The Misguided Adventure of Mavis Jennings

DISCLAIMER: Do I need to do a disclaimer for every chapter? Ah well… I do not own LOTR, Katy Perry songs, or any other fandom mentioned in this fanfic. Yay.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Thanks so much to everybody who read and followed! Rainbow Sprinkle Brownies to you! Comment! (NO FLAME!) So sorry that this update took so long. I was SO BUSY! But I do have the next few chapters planned out, they just need to be typed up and edited, so the updates should be coming much more frequently. FOR GONDOR!

Chapter 2- "I'm Wide Awake"

"Ugh"

Have you ever woken up in the middle of the night with a really full bladder? Yeah. It happens to everybody. So you sigh, get up, and go into the hall. Then you have to turn on the hall light. But when you do, the light blinds you and your eyes instantly start to water.

That's what I felt like when I regained conscience. I sat up, and my brow furrowed when my palms touched hard rock instead of the dead-ish grass of my backyard. Also, I was really cold. Like, really cold. And my shoes were gone. Of course, they were only cheap flip flops, so they must have come off when I fell.

When I squinted my eyes open, there was a… sword tip? What?

I blinked up, my eyes following the sword to whoever was holding it. I was surprised to see to guys that looked like they were a medieval festival. I mean, seriously. They both had green capes, trousers, baggy shirts… they even both had curly hair. The one holding the sword was of a pudgier sort of build with blonde curly hair, but the look in his eyes was murderous. The other dude had brown curly hair, a wiry build, and… were those his real eyes?

Before I had the chance to ask him, (I was confused, okay?) the Blondie butted in. "I don't know, Mr. Frodo, she could be on the enemy side, but…" Blondie looked at me calculatingly. "We should give her a chance," creepy-eyes responded "but be on your guard, Sam. We can't trust anyone we find out here"

I looked around again, totally mystified as to where I was. I looked again at the two guys. I took a deep breath. Then I remembered the sword point. So I did the most rational thing possible—I screamed.

Blondie quickly had dropped the sword, "No, misss… no, no." He raised a pudgy hand to cover my mouth. I reproachfully swatted it away, trying to get myself up. Blondie and creepy-eyes backed away, looking around fearfully like I was a bomb about to explode.. Creepy-eyes raised a hand to just under his neckline.

I backed away also. "Okay, I don't know where I am, but if this is some kind of joke… it isn't funny. Please, like, stop. Now."

Blondie looked at me as though I was crazy (which was probably a perfectly rational thought). "The only one of offense here is you, miss! What would a long-shanks, dressed in such strange attire, be here?"

He had kind of a cute accent, vaguely familiar. I hadn't traveled much and was awful with recognizing languages and accents, but I would have placed it somewhere from Great Britain. Working class, maybe?

It took me a moment to register what he said. I blinked again, feeling more and more alert with each second that passed. "Excuse me? I have strange attire?" I looked down at my T-shirt and flame-style jeans. "You should see yourselves! And who are you calling a long-shanks? I'll give you a long-shanks, buddy!"

Blondie backed away more, looking a creepy-eyes. Creepy-eyes finally spoke up. "She may be one of the enemy, Sam. We are not to trust her." I opened my mouth. "Aka-scuse me? Seriously? One of the enemy? I am standing right in front of you! And in case you didn't know, I did NOT want to be here. Now take me back to Minnesota, now."

Blondie (Sam?) looked like he was about to speak, but creepy-eyes spoke up first. "Be careful what you say, Sam. She may already know too much."

Sam looked at me with his eyebrows raised. "But what should we do with her, Mr. Frodo? She might go reporting to… him." I rolled my eyes. "Wow, hashtag dramatic." The Frodo-dude looked at me as though I was a pesky fly on the wall. "We must take her with us, Sam. We can take no risks. Do you have the elven rope?

My eyes widened. Were they about to tie me up? Oh no. Sam was getting something out of his pack… he was coming towards me, looking sorry… oh, no… "DUDE!" I yelled as he tried to grab my wrists. "PERSONAL BUBBLE!"