Update time! I decided to put this out sooner than I planned because a lot of you seem to like it, thanks for the reviews and favs. BTW, you Peony Ai readers, don't worry the next chap is coming soon.

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Disclaimer: Naruto belongs to Masashi-sensei


If I don't laugh I'd cry

Chapter – 3

Last time:

"What?" he asked with a little bite in his voice.

My eyes widened from shock and sudden realization and I pointed at him.

"Thief!" I cried and his brow creased in confusion.

"What?"

"THIEF!!!"

The thief blinked at me then looked behind him to see if there was any one else in the room then back at me again.

"What thief?" he asked.

"You! You're the thief!" I glared at him, I couldn't believe it, I caught the thief already! "Baa-chan! The thief's in here!!" I screamed down the hallway.

"What are you-" the thief dropped his handful of stolen supplies on the table and stepped towards me but I jumped into defensive stance (I took Taekwondo since I was five......off and on) and he stepped back.

"Don't come any closer or I'll scream!" I told him seriously and he looked at me like I was stupid and disgustingly annoying.

"I'm not a thief, my name is Uchiha Sasuke and I'm-"

"Why can't you get a job and earn a living like everyone else huh!?" I told him and I saw a knot of angry veins appear on his forehead as his fists clenched.

"BAA-CHAN, THE THIEF'S IN HERE!!" I screamed down the hall again, what was taking her so long?!

"If I were a thief, usuratonkachi, why would I tell you my name?" he asked me with a voice that was obviously straining to maintain patience.

"Hey! Don't call me names!!"

"You're a moron."

"Hey, you bastard, at least I'm not preying on the narrow budget of innocent high schools!!"

The thief's eye twitched and then he growled, "That's it, I'm leaving." He began to walk to the door which was the only exit and which I was blocking.

"Oh no, you're not getting away!" I stuck my head out into the hallway again, "BAA-CHAN, HE'S TRYING TO GET AWAY!!!"

"Get out of my way idiot or I'll kick your ass." He threatened me.

"NO! YOU'RE GOING TO JAIL LIKE ALL OF YOUR KIND!!!" I told him and he cringed and held his temples.

"Do you ever shut up!? You're so fucking loud and every time you open your mouth the dumber you sound!"

My eyes widened from shock. How can he be so rude when he's the one who was stealing here!!? The guy tried to get passed me but I wouldn't let him, I moved to the same corner of the door he did to block his way. He bumped into me then, for a moment I was hugging his body which was more slender and less muscular than mine, he smelled like a clean bath and some weak cologne. He shot me a fierce glare with those coldly black eyes and then shoved me, I stumbled back a bit, surprised by how strong he was, but I refused to give up! I grabbed the sleeve of his sweater and yanked him back before he could get passed me completely.

"What the hell are you doing!? Let me go!!" he said angrily as he tried to pull his sleeve, and also his arm, free but he couldn't so he kicked my knee.

It friggin hurt!!!

"Argh!!" I cried out and released him so that I could comfort the throbbing spot. "Hey, where are you going!!? I shouted at his quickly receding back. He was already fuming down the hall but I ran behind him and with a deafening war cry tackled him to the floor.

"THE FUCK!!!" he exclaimed.

"I TOLD YOU, YOU'RE UNDER ARREST!!!" I shouted as I tried to pin him down, but he was really fighting back, we rolled over.

"YOU CAN'T ARREST ME DUMBASS!!!"

We had been tussling and fighting on the floor in the middle of the hallway for a while, probably a couple of minutes. There was a allot of cursing, biting, and pulling of hair, the last time I fought like that I was…..okay, never mind. He kept calling me names and trying to get away but I wouldn't dare let him. Soon students started trickling to their classes and they saw us.

"Naruto, what's going on?" Gaara asked me when he came; the thief was on top trying to strangle me at that moment.

"Oh my God!" Sakura gasped.

"What the heck!" Ino besides her.

"N-Naruto?" Hinata looked frightened.

"G-Gaara," I struggled to talk and breath, "Ge-get Baa-chan."


Fifteen minutes later I was sitting outside of principal's office, a security guard on either side of me, hair more chaotic than usual, my clothes dirt stained and ruffled and a little torn, and I was grumbling, "How was I supposed to know he was a new teacher?"

"Didn't he try to tell you?" Kotetsu (security guard #1) asked me.

"No! He didn't say a thing!" I said bitterly and Izumo (security guard #2) watched me more closely with a skeptical eyebrow raised.

"Really Naruto? Really?" he asked me in a very knowing and irritating way and I folded my arms stubbornly.

"Maybe he did okay." I said and the two glanced at each other as if to say 'knew it'. "Just shut up, I'm supposed to be sitting here quietly." I told them and suddenly the door opened and the hag came out and right behind her was that guy; the new teacher's clothes were messed up too but for some reason, that really annoyed me, he was just a little neater than I was. I glowered at him, "I give you my word that this won't ever happen again, and one more time, I apologize." Baa-chan bowed and as she did she shot me a look that made my heart skip about four to five beats, Geez. "The rest of your time here at Konoha High will be a pleasant one, I'll make sure of it." (again with the petrifying death glare)

The new teacher, what was his name?....Sasuke?- he couldn't seem to care less how genuine Baa-chan's apology was. He just maintained the same vacant expression.

"And Naruto will write you a formal apology." The hag added and I jumped up.

"WHAT!!?" everyone eyed me, including Sasuke, his stare was cold and when he saw my pained expression because of the tedious punishment, I couldn't' believe it, the bastard smirked.

SMIRCKED!!!!

I wanted to slap the little devious smile off his face!!

"A 600 word apology should be enough." He said and Kototsu held the back of my shirt because I had unconsciously began moving towards the bastard, luckily Baa-chan didn't notice.

"Naruto?" she said my name in a tone of warning when I just stood there glaring curses upon him.

"Yeah- 600 words- got it." It felt like I was chewing on glass when I said that and the son of a grumpy bitch teacher just shrugged.

"Hn." He said and left. I watched him go down the hall wishing his hair would combust from my eyes.

But then Baa-chan grabbed my ear and used it as a leash to pull me in to her office.

Great, here comes the hour long lecture.


Dad picked me up from school because the hag kicked me out early.

"So what was he really doing with the supplies?" Dad asked in mid laugh, Dad is and probably will be the only authority figure in my life who would find all this funny.

"He was searching for the role." I grumbled blushing from embarrassment when Dad laughed out at that.

"Stop laughing at me! It could have happened to anyone."

"What ever will help you sleep at night son." He gave me one of his affectionate grins (which people say looks a lot like mine).

"Baka! Keep your eyes on the road!" I told him.

"Oh right, sorry."

Dad is a Physics Professor and Head of the Physics Department at Konohagakure U. He's a renown genius, has his own lab and written a handful of boring physics books, but a complete air head when it comes to everything else. Eight years ago he got into a really bad accident and had to learn how to walk all over again, I haven't been able to trust him with himself since.

"Did you eat anything this morning?" I asked him when I noticed that his skin was a few shades paler than usual.

"Right, I forgot." He said doing one of the many nervous gestures we share, the apologetic grin and itch at the back of the head, it works well on weak minds.

"*weary sigh* I'll make you lunch when we get home."

"I can't stay, I have to counsel this student on his thesi-" he stopped when he caught my look, 'the shut up and do as I say if you enjoy breathing' look (learnt it off of Baa-chan).

"So are you going to apologize to Uchiha-sensei?"

"I have to write a freakin 600 word apology." I growled feeling my anger swell dangerously. I felt like kicking something.

Dad smiled at me like he thought I was cute, "Well you better get started, this sensei sounds like no joke. He might try to avenge himself."

Avenge himself? If that meant more Naruto hate then it wouldn't be new to me. He should join the club.


Next chap coming soon. ^^