In My Life


a Dash companion (with props to daphnebeauty for the hooded sweatshirt idea)


"Hey there, Jim." Castle pounds his father in law's back and pulls him inside the loft. "Dash has been-"

"Papa!" Dash cries, practically falling down the stairs to get at his grandfather. "Daddy says we play all day!"

"It's Christmas Eve - I think that's exactly what it's for," Jim says, kneeling down to catch the boy in a hug. It doesn't last long; Dash is already jumping around, the hood of his green T-rex sweatshirt bouncing.

Kate laughs from the kitchen and wipes her hands off, coming for them. Jim stands, the boy in his arms, and gives Kate a one-armed hug; she kisses his cheek and then pulls back to stand at Castle's side. "Hey, Dad. Glad you got in town before the snow."

Rick smiles at her, lacing his fingers through hers. "I heard we're only supposed to get an inch or two this afternoon."

Jim shakes his head, shifting Dash in his arms. "I heard that too. And I got chains on the tires. No problem. Your mother coming, Rick?"

"She'll join us in the morning. Early. I think she's got something tonight?"

"Christmasy party at the school," Kate adds. "Dad, you sure you don't mind taking him for a little while?"

Jim is grinning and squeezing Dashiell's knee even as the boy squirms. "Not at all. I thought I'd take him to see a few of the lit-up trees, play in Central Park for a while. We'll be back here by lunch."

"Sounds good. Castle has a secret plan to wear him out," Kate laughs. "That fits right in."

Dashiell is trying to climb his grandfather's torso, hanging over Papa's shoulder. Lately, he likes to be upside down. Castle reaches over and snags him by the hood, tugs it over his head so that it looks like the open mouth of the t-rex. Dash roars from beneath it, his own face mostly hidden.

Castle chuckles. "Be good for Papa, wild man. Remember the good behavior chart?"

Dash twists around in Jim's arms and bounces a little, pushes the hood back. "Yes!"

"Tell Papa what you have to do," Kate murmurs, leaning in to kiss his cheek, ruffle his hair. "How you get stickers."

"I get stickers, Papa! When I do the right things."

"Like," Castle prompts.

"Like obey. And listen. And - and - and what else Daddy?"

"If you don't cry about coming home when we're done playing. That's a big one. And when there's a loud noise or a bright light or a lot of people crowding around, then being calm and staying with Mommy or Daddy or Papa. That gets you a sticker."

Jim switches arms, pulling Dash over to his other side. "You'll have to help me, Dash. When you think it's something that should get you a sticker. Okay?"

"I can help," Dash nods. "I'm a good boy. Santa comes."

Castle sees Kate smirking from the corner of his eye. "Of course you're a good boy," she says softly, her fingers reaching out again to comb through Dash's hair. She's been so much more touchy-feely lately; he secretly thinks it's the pregnancy hormones, and he hopes they last.

He reaches for Dash's coat on the floor of the foyer, holding it up. "So, Papa will let us know how many stickers you get while you're with him today. And when you get back for lunch, you can put them on your chart, okay?"

"Okey-dokey," Dash says, bobbing his head up and down crazily and extending an arm for his coat. "I will holds hands when I cross the street, too, Daddy."

"Oh, that's a good one. Definitely get a sticker for that."

"And. Uh. . .I will be good?"

"That's the general idea. What if Papa tells you to do something?"

"I do it! And I get a sticker!" Dash offers his other arm and Castle slides his coat on him. Jim tugs it closed and works at the big black buttons one-handed.

"That's right, buddy. So. You guys ready for some fun?"

"Yay!" Dash claps his hands together and then leans out for Kate. "Bye, Mommy."

Kate cups his cheeks and gives him a loud smack of her lips. "Bye, baby." She pushes him back into her father's arms and smiles. "Thanks, Dad. See you in a few hours."

They head out the door, and Castle shuts it behind them, then turns and glances at Kate. There is so much to do. They've been trying to get Christmas stuff done for weeks now, but Dashiell is like a leech; he wants to be glued to one of them all day long, peeking over their shoulders and hanging on to their legs and asking about every single thing they try to hide from him.

"Whew. Time to wrap presents. Oh, and the stocking stuff. I have a few more things to get."

She bites her bottom lip. "When does Alexis get here?"

"At lunch. But she's going right back out again. She won't be able to distract the kid for long, if at all."

Kate smooths a hand down her stomach and sighs. "Get going, Castle. Lots to do."


"You might want to put the sword away, Sir Dash." Castle dips the end of Dashiell's plastic sword with his thumb and gives him a look.

Dash sets his face in a pout and opens his mouth to say something, but Kate beats him to it.

"I don't think that was a suggestion, Dashiell."

She levels him with a look too, and Castle hides his smirk behind his hand as he turns for the fridge. "Put it away, son. Mommy needs your help with the cookies."

His son's face transforms, and he practically chucks the sword towards the living room.

"Dash. No throwing. Pick it up and put it away."

"Where?"

"Somewhere Daddy or Papa won't step on it." Kate pushes against him with her knee, and Castle brings the sticks of margarine to the counter.

"What else?" he murmurs, scanning the recipe.

"Food coloring," she offers, reaching past him to the spice rack for vanilla and cinnamon.

He ducks his head to kiss her neck, lips at her skin, and feels her shiver. Her hand swats at him, and he moves away, grabbing food coloring from the pantry. "Need flour, sugar-?"

"Yeah, that and baking soda. Um. What else. . .brown sugar."

He grabs those as well and piles them on the counter, watching her move in the kitchen. From behind, she doesn't even look pregnant. Her outline is off, different, but nothing that looks as-

Well. Then she turns back to him.

But the roundness of her belly barely seems to make a dent in her movements or her abilities. She's on desk duty, of course, but they've still got six weeks before the due date, and Kate's only concession seems to be getting more sleep.

They could battle it out for the title of champion sleeper; she wakes at ten on Saturdays and seems mortified she's slept in so late. But he thinks it's funny-

"Castle. Go make Dash wash his hands. I think he forgot that part. Oh, and sticker him. Remember? I think it's a total of four so far."

He steps in and steals another kiss just as her father comes down the stairs from the guest bedroom. Castle laughs against Kate's mouth and backs away, searching for Dash.


Castle winces but Kate just sighs from the couch and shakes her head, hugging Dashiell back with both arms, crouched low to get at him. "Thank you, baby."

When Dash pulls away, red and green food coloring has stained the last pair of pants Kate likes to wear - she said that just this morning, how she can't find pants that fit right and she loves these and-

Red and green fingerprints, smears, an entire palm print. On the back of her pants, atop her thighs, all over. Actually, it's kinda funny. Castle meets her eyes and she's smiling softly. She's looked like this all afternoon, actually. Warm, fuzzy. Like she's melted with Christmas cheer.

"Daddy, did you see what a good job I did?" Dashiell says, tugging away from his mother to look at Castle.

"I did, my man. Such a good job with those cookies."

"Even Mommy says I did so good a job," he says with relish, his chest puffing with pride. Kate is giving Castle a raised eyebrow when Dash turns his face back to her.

"Oh, yes. I think you did a great job, baby. You're very helpful."

Jim reaches down and swings Dashiell up into his arms. "How about you and me play knights?"

"Oh yes! Santa might get me castle. But I got swords."

Jim carries him up the stairs, and Castle reaches out to Kate, slides his fingers over one of her thighs as he comes to sit next to her on the couch. "Looks good, red and green-"

Kate nudges him with a knee. "Hush. Now I have no idea what to wear."

"Wear sweatpants," he shrugs.

"For Christmas Eve dinner?"

"Wear that dress I got you-"

She claps her hand over his mouth, laughing. "Hush. That's not a dress and you know it."

He grins and kisses her palm, licks sugar crystals from the skin of her thumb. She shivers and closes her eyes, getting that withdrawn and out of focus look again.

"Kate?" he whispers.

Her eyes open slowly, brimming and rich, and it takes his breath away.

She leans in, brushes her open mouth over his lips, her own breath quick and heavy against his cheek. He grips her at the waist, what he can, feels the baby move between them even as Kate's fingers curl at his neck and pull him in.

Her kiss is slow and languid, hot; she strokes her tongue across the roof of his mouth, then around his and deeper, velvet and dark and wet.

He shudders, fingers digging into her skin, tries to keep from drowning in it.


Kate answers the door.

"Sorry I'm late."

"Who's that?" Castle yells, and comes around the kitchen towards his wife.

"It's Allie," Kate laughs and Castle huffs at both of them. Alexis steps farther into the foyer and drops her bag.

"It's Alexis," he grumbles, taking a hug from his daughter and away from Kate.

"I don't mind Allie," she says, squeezing him tightly and kissing his cheek. "I never had a nickname before. And it's just a joke between me and Mom."

"Allie!" Dashiell crows from the top of the stairs.

Rick sighs.

Alexis giggles. "Okay, well. Maybe it's catching. Sorry, Dad." She gives him puppy dog eyes but heads for the stairs and her brother.

Dash stands still and makes her come to him, arms held wide, and Alexis gathers him up, raspberrying his neck as he squirms.

Kate's fingers slide around Castle's wrist and then curl in his palm, invitingly. He gives in and takes her hand, their fingers lacing together. She's close at his side, hip brushing his, the belly bumping into him.

He knocks their hands against her side, rubbing the back of his fingers to the spot where he knows the baby likes to hang out. Or has been lately, either a knee or an elbow. He thinks it's a knee, but Kate says that'd put the baby upside down. Which he likes, because it means both Dash and the baby are hanging around upside down lately.

"Hey, buzz buzz in there," he murmurs, leaning over to kiss her stomach.

Kate's thumb pushes into his forehead, arrests his movement. "The bee references are getting old, Castle. Making me feel like a hive."

He laughs and looks up at her, apologizing with a curl of his lips. She shakes her head at him. At least she went ahead and changed into a loose pair of yoga pants. They tend not to stay up, but the blousy purple shirt she's wearing definitely hides any gap in material.

Too bad.

"BK is doing good today," he says instead. "Lots of movement for the sleepy bee."

"Lot more than usual, yeah," she murmurs, glancing up as Alexis brings Dashiell back down the stairs in her arms. The boy is wriggling around and chattering nonstop, nearly hanging off of her.

"Are you going back out again?" Castle asks.

"Yeah, sorry," Alexis winces. "I can stay for dinner."

"No, no. Neglect your poor, old Dad. Use us for Christmas dinner, and then go have fun."

Kate knocks into him with the belly, glaring. "Ignore him. All we'll be doing is trying to get this one into b-e-d so a certain Grinch can set things up."

"You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch!" Dash yells.

Alexis grins back and pretends to drop Dash to the floor; he giggles like a fool and clutches her.

"Allie you play with me?"

Castle groans. Like the kid hasn't had every single person playing with him all day long. "Buddy, we just got back from ice skating with Gram. How about-"

"Oh, Dashy, tell me about ice skating," Alexis says, carrying him to the couch and bouncing him down on it. "Tell me all the stories I've missed and we can play something quiet downstairs."

From the kitchen, Jim calls out, "Dash, remember the little girl with the pink hair? You told me about her."

Dashiell turns back to Alexis and grabs her, hands against his sister's cheeks, his eyes wide. "Pink hair! All over pink."

Kate shoots a look to Castle, askance on her face. He just shrugs at her; the girl wasn't that crazy looking, but it really stuck with Dash apparently.

"Allie, it was so bright it hurted my eyes."

At Kate's burst of laughter, Castle feels the baby kick out. He puts his fingers against her belly, stunned all over again by it.

She meets his eyes, her face filled with it, beautiful and serene and almost ethereal. Like she's just beyond his reach right now, listening to some quiet voice inside, the pull of their baby girl.