Author's Note: Just one more chapter after this one. I am still new to this, so any review love you could share would be very welcome!


They stepped out into the cool, quiet night, piling their hastily packed duffles into the back of Pete's jeep. Rose felt anticipation in the air, buoying her up. Silently she stared out the window as the dark landscape began rolling by, her mind focused inwards. All the research she and Mickey had done, the help they had sought, had left them with no answers. She felt so frustrated and frightened by the unexplainable affliction that had taken hold of her, and a part of her grasped desperately at the ray of hope still glimmering within her. Maybe, somehow, the Doctor had found a way. A way across the impossible distance that separated them.

However, beneath that sliver of hope, a calm, rational voice urged her insistently yet gently to face the truth. The truth that, if he had been able, he would have met her here - in parallel London, in the TARDIS, in person. Not left her chasing phantom voices hither and yon across the planet. Stubbornly, defiantly, Rose shut that voice out - she had to.

The miles seemed endless. Across the water, then back on the road, hardly stopping, a sense of urgency driving them onwards. Most of the time they were silent, either lost in thought or asleep. As she had become accustomed to at home, Rose played off her frequent bouts of fatigue fairly easily. Mickey's watchful gaze always marked them, though, and he would silently offer what support he could, drawing her close to him protectively.

Rose tried to draw upon his strength, but she felt guilty knowing that she would have to beg off driving. Though this whole impossible endeavor was for her, she was terrified of losing control at the wheel - it simply wasn't worth the risk. Up until now, Mickey had willingly given her a lift whenever she needed one. Now she would have to make some excuse - that she was too distracted or anxious, which while true, was not the whole truth. Such a bald-faced lie, when added to the more subtle charade she'd been maintaining, suddenly felt like too much.

She was so tired, drained by her mysterious malady and the stress of covering it up. And if there was even the remotest possibility that she might return with the Doctor to her home universe, she couldn't leave things with her mum this way. Because part of her knew that Jackie would stay, just as she knew that, if she could, she would travel with the Doctor forever. Her heart ached at the thought of losing her mum even as it thrilled at the idea of being with him again. S'only a possibility, her mind whispered. Just follow the voice for now, that's all. And confide in mum. She deserves it.

They made a brief stop in a small town in Denmark, allowing a moment to stretch cramped limbs and refuel. On her way out of the loo, Rose just had time to register the sensation of sudden, overwhelming weariness as it crashed mercilessly upon her. She stumbled weakly into the side of the building. The rough bricks caught at her side, scratching her through her jumper but helping to slow her fall.

Breathe, she reminded herself, reciting the mantra that helped keep her sane. In, out. You are Rose Tyler. You've faced death countless times, witnessed the end of the earth. You've traveled with the Doctor and saved worlds. You have a family here who loves you, and somewhere out there, the mad alien you love is still alive because of you. You are a survivor. Now keep it together. Her head pounded and the strange blaze swept through her. She refused to surrender to her fury and fear, knowing that if she allowed them to take over they would destroy her. Though her body might eventually fall, her mind and heart were still her own, and she would fight until the end.

Moments later, by sheer force of will, Rose gathered herself enough to stand, though she still rested lightly against the wall for support. She glanced quickly about, relieved to see that no one had witnessed the sudden attack. Her renewed determination kept the frustrated tears behind her eyes at bay. With practiced casualness, she made her way to one of the tables inside the little store. In reality she fought for each step.

She let herself down into the chair with a sigh of relief, closing her eyes. The familiar questions assaulted her. What was happening to her, and why? She shied away from thinking of how it might end. She missed her brilliant Doctor more than ever - as if it were possible to miss him any more than she already did. If anyone could help her, he could.

A familiar squeeze of her hand caused her to look up. Jackie sat across from her, oddly quiet. Rose attempted a small smile and was surprised by the tears that abruptly gathered in her mum's eyes.

"Don't you know - you can't pretend to me, sweetheart." Jackie's voice quivered the way it always did when she was overcome by emotion, and Rose was awash with guilt and fear, dreading her next words. "You think I don't see? Your own mum? What are you hidin', Rose?"

Her knowing, hurt eyes pricked Rose's heart. What had she been thinking? No matter what else was going on in her life, this was her mum.

Rose's vision blurred as the words she'd been keeping in check poured out. "I'm so sorry, mum. I know I haven't been easy to live with. I just want so much for you to be happy." She grasped Jackie's hands tightly in her own. "And I didn't want to admit it to myself, either, not for awhile, but... somethin's wrong with me."

Pete and Mickey had hung back at first, sensing that the women needed some time to talk. Now they brought over the snacks they had purchased and joined the conversation. Rose proceeded to describe what she'd been experiencing as best she could. While they looked very worried, her parents did not seem overly shocked. For some time Jackie had been suspicious that something strange was going on, though she had been confused as to what it was and why Rose was hiding it from her. She had observed in silence, finding some comfort in Mickey's attentive care of her, knowing that at least Rose wasn't facing it alone. She had been on the verge of confronting Rose for several days before they'd embarked on this strange journey.

Tears, apologies, and hugs followed, though soon they all agreed that they needed to press on. Rose's heart felt lighter than it had in months. There was no question of Rose's driving. With Pete behind the wheel, they set off again, Rose curled up like a little girl in her mother's protective arms.


The Doctor leaned heavily against the console. All was ready. The TARDIS' course was set, orbiting a supernova, channeling the power that would send a signal across the Void.

One last goodbye.

He felt his ship's sadness, though he was once again startled by the complexity of emotion behind it. The loss was devastating to both of them. Ever since Canary Wharf his TARDIS had been acting strangely. He'd noticed some odd power fluctuations, probably a result of the trauma of that day's events, but it would wait. After this, he felt sure that he wouldn't want to do much of anything for awhile; he'd have plenty of time to sort it out then.

First he had to face this. Face her. He had endured so much in almost a millennium of living - war and betrayal and death, so much death. At least he didn't have to watch her die, he thought. Yet even as he cringed at the notion, he knew that the reality before him felt no less bleak, his hearts no less broken.

He had to be strong for her one last time. Surely he could mask the fact that his hearts were breaking; he had perfected that mask so well. He had hidden behind it, feigning indifference, trying to protect them both. Ironic, that.

Now he was left wondering if she even knew, and just the possibility that she didn't tore him apart. He knew she loved him, had known for quite some time. At the last, perhaps when he needed them most, he felt the last of his defenses dissolve into the air. He couldn't pretend anymore. Not with her.

She would know, in this last precious moment together, before she was ripped from his grasp forever - she would finally know how much he loved her. His precious girl. And he would treasure the smile that would blossom across her face one final time. A smile filled with joy and sadness, that could light the night sky with its brilliance.

And then... well.

Then he would carry on, same as always... except not. Rules broken, hearts shattered, hope lost. Broken once more, but without his Rose to heal him and make him whole.