A/N:

Thanks, as always, for the support and feedback.

This chapter is one I really wanted to write because I love the conversation JJ and Hotch have when the team find out she's pregnant in season 3 and I really wanted to write a scene where she does confide in him. There will be more of Will and JJ in the next chapter but as much as I adore them together, I don't think it suits JJ's character to have him holding her hand all the time, so I wanted this just to be JJ and Hotch.

Anyway, I hope you like it and feel free to let me know what you think :)

/
/

Will had offered to go with her – he wasn't due at work until later in the morning so it wouldn't have been any trouble. But she'd insisted she would go herself. She'd told him to take Henry to school and stop worrying; she was a big girl and it was only Hotch that she was speaking with. All of that was true, but now, as her shoes clicked across the floor of the quiet bullpen and she approached his office, she wished her husband was by her side. It was irrational, but she was half expecting some kind of seismic shift in the world the instant the words left her mouth. Like somehow it would be all the more real when someone else knew.

She took a deep breath and smoothed down her blouse, momentarily imagining that there was a bump underneath which would give her away before she was ready. Mentally scolding herself for being so nervous, she knocked on the door.

"Come in," came Hotch's reply, almost immediately.

"Hi," she greeted him, with an anxious smile as she stepped inside closing the door behind her in case any of the team should arrive while they were talking.

"JJ, you should be at home," he told her seriously, noticing that she looked as pale and tired as the previous day.

"I need to talk to you about something," she replied. "Have you got a minute?" She looked uneasy and not at all like the confident woman he knew she was.

"Of course – take a seat," he instructed, pointing to the sofa in the corner of the office. He stood up and moved across the room to join her, since something told him this conversation was not one they should have with the formality of a desk between them. "Is everything OK?" he asked with a slight frown.

JJ looked down at her hands, which she clasped and rested on top of her knees. It was just Hotch – why was she letting herself get so worked up?

"I don't know why I'm finding this so hard," she remarked, with an uneasy laugh.

"Is something wrong?" Hotch was becoming more concerned by her odd behaviour.

"No," she assured him. "Well…Not really."

"JJ," he commanded softly, placing his hand tentatively on her shoulder. "What is it you need to tell me?" He studied her face closely, noting the lack of colour in her cheeks and the shadows which surrounded her eyes. She looked worn out - like something was sucking the energy from her.

"I'm pregnant," she blurted out, before the words could become stuck in her throat.

A smile crept across Hotch's face.

"Is that all?" he breathed with relieved laugh. "For a moment there I thought you were going to tell me you were seriously ill!"

"I'm sorry," she replied with an apologetic smile. "We haven't told anyone yet and I didn't know what to say. I thought you might have guessed yesterday."

"That's OK," Hotch assured her, still feeling the sense of relief that there was nothing wrong with his friend. "And I had my suspicions yesterday but I thought you would have told me if that was the case." He widened his eyes, trying to remind her of when she had kept the same secret while pregnant with Henry. It was only because of Will that she had been forced to come clean last time and he'd hoped she'd trust him more if it happened again.

JJ's unease seemed to turn to guilt in response and Hotch immediately felt bad.

"Congratulations, JJ," he offered with a smile. "I'm just glad you've told me now."

"Thank you," she replied, her voice cracking slightly under the strain of an unidentified emotion.

He noticed she wasn't smiling.

"It is good news?" he questioned, not wanting to pry but unable to ignore the fact she looked as though she would burst into tears at any second.

Not now. Just get a hold of yourself, Jennifer. As she felt the all too familiar sensation of hot tears pooling in her eyes, JJ begged her out of control, hormonal body to obey her for the next few minutes at least. She really didn't want her morning to involve crying all over her boss. Especially since she already seemed to have momentarily scared him into thinking she was dying.

"Yes, it's good news," she quickly responded, in a quiet voice. She raised her head to face him but to her traitorous eyes he was only a blurry face topped with a dark mass of hair.

"Then what's wrong?" he asked.

"Nothing's wrong," she assured him shaking her head and trying to blink away the tears. The flood of relief at revealing her secret, the effect of Hotch's kindness, and the fears and memories which were always at the back of her mind were all competing for her attention and her head felt like it might explode. She supposed that in a sense, it was already doing so, in the form of the silent tears which were now spilling down her cheeks.

"JJ, you're crying," he remarked, with a hint of surprise.

"I know I'm crying!" she snapped, wiping her face with her sleeve.

He scanned the room for a box of tissues, which he quickly found and retrieved for JJ. He remembered Haley's tearful outbursts when she was pregnant with Jack, but it was an entirely different matter to see one of the strongest members of his team doing the same.

"I'm really sorry about this," JJ apologised with an embarrassed smile, as she slowly regained control, and dabbed at her eyes with a tissue.

"It's OK," Hotch replied, returning an understanding smile.

"I wasn't such a mess with Henry," she continued.

"You don't have to explain," Hotch assured her. He could see that she was embarrassed by her uncharacteristic behaviour and he wanted her to feel comfortable again.

"No, I do; I want to," she insisted, straightening up and looking a lot more like herself. She took another deep breath and forced herself to look Hotch in the eye. "I had a miscarriage. It was about three years ago when I was in Afghanistan. I only told Will after… after Askari."

Hotch was watching her with a mix of sympathy and admiration. It amazed him that she could have gone through so much during her time away from the BAU, and during her abduction, and yet still continue with her job with even more commitment than before, or sit before him and calmly recite the details of a personal tragedy.

"So this baby," she continued, her hand drifting to her stomach. "It's a lot for both of us to deal with. We're happy; but it's complicated."

Hotch nodded in understanding.

"I'm so sorry…" he began, but she shook her head to stop him.

"I only wanted to explain why I didn't say anything until now," she informed him. "And why I don't want anyone else to know yet."

"I understand," he assured her. "What do you want to do about work?" He knew there were other practical reasons for her revealing her pregnancy and he was sure it would make her life a little bit easier if they could address them.

"I don't know," she admitted. "Will wants me out of the field and I don't want to put the baby at risk but…"

She didn't need to finish her sentence; he understood. Their work was so much more than just a job. While JJ put her role as a mother first, it didn't mean she could completely sideline her work. Being a profiler and an agent was a part of her and she needed to keep that part alive; she needed to feel that she was doing something for the world into which this child would be born.

"We can work something out," he promised and she knew that he would do everything he could to help her protect her unborn child and do her job.

"Thank you," she replied with a grateful smile.

"But for today, I want you to go home and get some rest – you still look exhausted. Take a few days and then we'll sort out the arrangements surrounding your duties," he ordered, making it clear that those days off were not optional.

"OK," she agreed, standing up to leave before she the tears threatened to begin again.

Hotch also stood up and showed her across the room, pausing and placing his hand on her arm before opening the door.

"Congratulations again," he smiled, a rarely seen look of genuine happiness spreading across his face as he fully processed his agent's good news. "To both of you. If you need anything just let me know."

"We will," she responded, feeling touched by his response. And she was surprised by how much lighter she felt now that she had the support of her unit chief and friend. Will had been right about telling him, and while she would do anything to prevent the "I told you so" she was bound to receive, she was happy that she'd listened to her husband. On this matter at least.