LUNCH, WEEK TWO, DAY FOUR
I walked back into the office, holding a McDonald's bag in one hand and a large Diet Cola in the other. I knocked on the door of Michael's private office and grinned, "Hey…Michael?"
"He's not in at the moment," Pam grinned back, using her receptionist tone and looking up from her desk. "may I take a message?"
"Yes, this is Intern 'Zohan'. Tell him that I was going to give him the fries from my meal but will now have to share them with someone else. Please inform Mr. Scott that I apologize." I slipped the fries out of my bag, filling the room with the scent. "I thought it'd be okay to indulge today. Since it's Thursday and all."
"TGIThursday?" Andy called from his desk, soon followed by the squeaking of the wheels of his chair toward us. I groaned. Andy was not exactly my favorite person in the office.
"Yeah…so?" I replied, putting a few fries into my mouth with a curious look. "Want some fries?"
"Yes I diddly-do!"
Killed the joy of sharing right there. "Take 'em." I handed over the whole container of fries and looked over the rest of the office. "Hey, where'd Dwight go?"
"Sales call with Michael," Andy managed through a mouth full of deep-fried potato.
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Zoe On-Screen Interview
One thing I hate about being an intern? It's basically like being a temp. You do what other people aren't there to do. So when Dwight is off on a "sales call", I have to do his work.(pauses) Why do I doubt he's on a sales call? Because he's with Michael. It's probably something corporate-related and they're only saying it's a sales call.
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My face fell, "Oh? Does this mean I have to take his regular calls?" Please say no, please say no, pleeease say no!
"You could, but I don't think you should," Jim turned in his chair to join the conversation.
This answer was met by a grin from me. "What? Am I not sales material yet?" I questioned, taking the burger from the paper bag, unwrapping it and examining it. After I finished talking, I took a bite, listening to Andy as he answered with a full mouth–again.
"Not quite, young grasshopper. You have much yet to learn before you can make a good sales call."
I swallowed my bite of meat, bun, and cheese with a shrug, "Yeah, I guess you're right…if I knew what you were talking about."
"Don't understand me, little one?"
I stole one of my french fries, "So you're insulting my height now? Technically you're shorter than me right now. You're the one sitting down and I'm standing."
"You dare take fries from the master?"
I nearly choked on my fry. I swallowed and laughed, "Are you kidding me? Dude, Andy. Love ya, but this is not a martial-art movie. Speak English, modern dialect," I took a few more fries, "and I gave you these, I can take back as many as I want."
"No take-backsies!" Andy complained, snatching the fries back and stuffing them into his mouth. "Ha!"
I made a face of disgust at the sight of potato guts squishing around in Andy's mouth. "Ew." I looked over at Pam, "Any clue on when Michael and Dwight will be back?"
"Four, maybe five," Pam replied as she tapped her pencil on the surface of the desk. "Tomorrow morning, maybe?"
I rollled my eyes, "They're in New York?"
"Corporate stuff."
I marked one point on the invisible chalkboard in front of me, dragging my finger down about two inches from my eyeline, giving the cameraman across the office from me a 'I know things' look at him. The cameraman waved at me and lowered the camera from his face. I blushed and ducked my head. Brendan.
"What? What is it?" Pam whispered, noticing my sudden shyness. "Forgot something? See someone?"
"Oh, it's nothing. Nothing at all."
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Zoe On-Screen Interview:
No I don't have a crush on anyone in the office. Not anyone involved. (pauses, shifts nervously in seat, clears throat) Did I tell you guys I'm getting my first outfit of "casual business attire"? Yup! Going to Target after I'm done today to go pick it out. I saw this really cute black blazer and slacks. And there was an adorable light purple button-down that I liked. I'm using some of the graduation money I got from my family. I'm using the rest on an apartment. (shy smile)
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WEEK THREE, DAY ONE. JUNE TWENTY-SECOND.
It's Monday.
Ugh.
Nothing to report.
"Hey hey Little Miss Fancy-Suit!" Michael called, grinning at me as I brought in his coffee at nine-thirty like I had made a habit of doing. He was complimenting–I hoped–on the new look I was sporting to my internship. It wasn't exactly the one I had descibed to the camera crew on Thursday. Truthfully, Kelly had come with me to Target and picked it out for me. It was still black slacks and blazer, but with a more official-looking white button-down shirt.
"Thanks, Mr. Scott. I thought it would be appropriate for today."
"And why would that be, Zo-Zo?" Michael asked, taking the mug from me and sipping from it. I sat on his desk, turned at the waist to look at him, and stuck out my lower lip ever so slightly.
"Mr. Scott, I want a job here."
He chuckled, "Why?"
"Well, with college falling through like a one-ton weight through plywood…I need something to do sustain myself financially until I can get into Scranton Community College. And I need tuition money for when I do actually get into college."
"Aren't you staying with your folks?"
"They won't give me any money. Plus I've already made the down payment on an apartment using my graduation money that my extended family gave me." I sniffed, slipping off his desk and into the seat across from it. I made my lower lip quiver, "Please Mr. Scott. I need this job. I'll be a coffee-girl…copy-girl? How about an assistant? All of the big-wigs at corprate have them, right? Why not a regional manager?"
"You're an intern."
"BUT…but, but, but, but…I won't be an intern come August, right? Right?" I begged, digging through my mental book of make-daddy-get-me-what-I-want tricks from my pre-teen and early-teen years.
Most of the tactics were unproffessional and probably would still work on Michael, but still. I wanted to retain my dignity. "I'm not asking for this as an intern. I'm asking for it as a…a daughter. Your daughter in the Dunder Mifflin Scranton family." I made the most innocent and pleading face that I could. "I consider you my father here. Could you please gimmie the job, Daddy?"
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Zoe On-Screen Interview:
Dignity still in tact, kissing up to the boss to get a job, pulling the "Please? For me?" face. All part of a good saleswoman. I could totally sell paper in person.
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He looked at me for a good solid minute before leaning back in his chair, mumbling, and resting his elbows on the table. "I'll have to think about it. Would you still think of me as a Dunder Mifflin Daddy to you if I said no?" he inquired warily.
I nodded, "Oh yeah. But I would go into a rebellious rage and run off with a cameraman or something. Maybe trash your office, mope around the break room, burst into tears when you walk by. Scream 'Why don't you love me!?' and run out of the room. That kind of rebellious daughter crap."
"I see. I'll think on it. G'bye, Zo-Zo darlin'."
I stood up from my seat, calmly walked out of his office, and sat in a stray empty spinny-chair. I eyed Dwight for a moment, wondering what it'd be like to prank him. I wondered if he was still freaked out about the website having a sentient brain and all. It'd be fun to try that. The essay was alright but hardly worth doing again. Pretend to flirt with the producer's assistant or a cameraman and "inform" Jim and Pam that I was sleeping with said producer to get a permanent spot on the show? I smirked evilly. That might work. Even better, I could say it was someone from corporate, get Jim and Pam in on it so I could get some professional advice. I could see it all now, it was practically perfect in almost every way.
I took out my phone and shot Jim a text 'hey, thinking of pulling a prank for the first time. help plz?'
'who did you have in mind?'
'andy, maybe dwight?'
'andy is better'
'k, what should I do?'
We eventually came to the conclusion on what exactly I would do to prank Andy. And I admit. It was pretty devilish. I definitely needed to take lessons from Jim for my dorm-mate if they were a total ass.
This prank was going to be so much fun!
