The Night of the Victorian Plot – Part 2
Welcome to America
Chapter 3
The Traveller
Walking along the track side they could see attached to the engine three carriages or cars. When they reached the last car there was a backplate with a rail around it and a gate through which one could gain access to the train. They followed Colonel Richmond through the gate and onto the backplate and through a door into the first car. This was set up as a sitting room, with a couch and two armchairs and a fireplace, with a speaking tube to one side.
"That's so you can communicate with the engineer while the train is in motion," Richmond explained.
The far end of the car was closed off to provide space for a small room and when they entered they found themselves in a galley. There was a pot-bellied stove with a coffee pot on the top and a saucepan and a frying pan hanging from hooks on the wall. There was also a small sink fed from a reservoir with a counter top and some shelving. The food supplies consisted of cured meats and sausage, also canned and dried goods including coffee.
"Any cooking you do will be rudimentary but at least you won't starve when you are a long distance from the nearest town," the Colonel commented.
"So this train is to be our transport to New Mexico," Artemus said,
"I thought that was obvious," was the reply. The Colonel was already entering the next car. The two Englishmen exchanged a grin and followed him.
Next they came to the sleeping quarters which consisted of two single beds and a chest and a wardrobe to store their clothes. There were several boxes stored on the floor.
"I'll leave you two to unpack those," Richmond said.
On the wall was a painting of the White House which Colonel Richmond slid upwards to reveal a collection of knives and firearms. There were also gun-belts hanging from the wall below the painting.
There was a screen behind which stood a bath and a water-closet, also in the second car.
The third car was empty but it was obvious that it was meant to be used as a stable. There were various items of tack hanging up and other necessary equipment for the care of horses. A supply of horse-feed had also been included. There was also a six foot by three foot cell with bars and a door with a heavy-duty lock.
"To bring Dr Loveless back with you to Washington," the Colonel informed them, seeing their puzzled expressions.
The two men looked at each other with wrinkled noses, imagining the horror of being locked in with horses for the fifteen hundred mile journey. It almost made you feel sorry for the prisoner, or the horses, depending on your point of view.
"Of course you have to catch him first," Richmond reminded them.
"What's next?" James asked.
"Now I need to introduce you to the engineer and fireman."
By the time they returned to the engine there were two men, dressed in oil-stained overalls and caps, busily readying it for departure.
"James West, Artemus Gordon, I'd like you to meet Nate Fowler and Otis Johnson, the engineer and fireman for the Traveller."
Fowler and Johnson wiped their hands and held them out in greeting.
"Nice to meet you," James said. Artemus nodded a greeting to them both.
"So you're the two limeys we were expecting," Fowler said.
"That's right," Artemus said. "I suppose we'll get to know each other better during the journey."
"No way of avoiding it," Johnson piped up.
"Where will you sleep?" James asked.
"There are bunks underneath the tender," Fowler said, "and we sleep out in the open if the weather's good and there are no dangerous animals about."
"And we cook our own grub," Johnson said, "but we share your supplies."
"No problem," James said.
"I'll leave you two to it then," Richmond said, turning to leave. He beckoned to the two Englishmen to follow him.
James shrugged at the engineer and fireman as if to say 'sorry, looks like this meeting is over'.
Richmond headed back to his carriage talking as he went.
"I've had my driver put your luggage on board for you. The train will leave as soon as she's ready to depart. Fowler will let you know when."
They saw two horses being led toward them and Colonel Richmond stopped and told them they should become acquainted with their mounts before they arrived in New Mexico. "They're both excellent animals," he said as they watched them being loaded into the stable car.
They had only been on board the Traveller for a short while when Nate used the speaking tube to tell them that the train was about to pull out of the yard and onto the railroad. James and Artemus were in the sleeping car, going through the boxes Colonel Richmond had left for them. James went through to the parlour car when he heard the noise from the speaking tube and acknowledged the message before returning to his partner.
"This box has your name on it," Artemus said.
James opened it and looked at the pile of shirts, cravats and ties.
"We won't have to do any laundry for a while," he commented.
"Take a look at these!" Artemus said, holding aloft a pair of thigh length black-knit underclothes. "I'm going to change into these as soon as we've finished in here."
"Yes, all these clothes are better suited to this climate," James commented as he came across several pairs of cavalry twill trousers in another of the boxes. "Have you seen the brocade waistcoats?"
"They must be a gift from the Colonel to help us feel more at home," Artemus chimed in. These suits are a bit outrageous though." He had opened the wardrobe and found several hanging up there, in his size. "It's the colours that are the problem," James said, walking over to take a look at them. "Grey is alright and the burgundy one is very smart but I really don't like the blue one with the piping and the green one needs to be set fire to."
"Well maybe I'll just wear the trousers. I have a couple of Jackets in tan corduroy and leather I can wear."
James shrugged. "Maybe we should just wear what we've been given. The Colonel's aim was for us to fit in after all," he added, noticing that his own suits were of a slimmer cut and quite flattering to his more toned physique.
"Yes, you're right of course," Artemus replied. "And I've been thinking about that," he added, sitting down on one of the beds. James joined him.
"What is it?" James asked.
"I think I ought to adopt an American accent."
"You ought to? Don't you mean 'we'?"
"The thing is I've been trained as an actor…"
"More like you picked it up during a misspent youth."
"Anyway, I have experience with accents and you don't." He paused and then said with an American accent, "I'm a keen student and I believe I could pass as a native."
"That's not bad," James said grudgingly. "But we need to pick up some American vocabulary."
"I think I have just the thing," Artemus said, pulling a small paper-backed book out of his inside jacket pocket. "I picked this up at the newsstand in New York when I left the hotel to try and find an English newspaper. It's called 'Cowboy Thrill Magazine'* and the way the characters in the stories speak is just what we need to learn."
"Let me have a look at that!" James said, snatching the magazine from his hand. "This is amazing," he said. "We can learn a lot about life in the west too."
"That's what I thought. It will take you a while before you can pass as an American though."
"What do you suggest I do in the meantime?"
"Well you should probably stick to saying 'yep' and 'nope' for the time-being."
James nodded and went about putting his new clothes away while repeating the two words in the best American accent he could muster.
"Oh and there's one more thing," Artemus said.
"What's that?"
"If we want to fit in I think I should address you as 'Jim' and you should call me 'Artie'."
"Do we have to?"
"Yes."
"Don't you mean 'yep'?"
Artie threw a boot at him.
When it was time for lunch Jim and Artie were already dressed in their new clothes. They went to the galley and decided to have some bread and sausage.
"A bottle of beer would go nicely with this," Artie said, "what a pity we don't have any."
"I still have some tea in my luggage," Jim said.
"We're American now," Artie proclaimed. "Let's have a cup of coffee. Have you ever made coffee before?"
"No, when I want to drink coffee I go to a coffee house and someone else makes it."
"Okay. That's American by the way,"
"Very good."
"Okay, why don't I sort out the food and you try to make a pot of coffee."
"Okay."
It took him twenty minutes.
"Yeuchhh!" Artie said, in an attempt to expel the nasty taste of the bitter, muddy liquid Jim had poured into a cup for him. "What the hell was that?"
"I don't think it's all that bad," Jim replied, rather offended by his friend's reaction.
"I am the only one allowed to make coffee on board this train from this moment until my dying breath," Artie decreed, "which will be significantly delayed if I don't drink any more of this filth." He backed up his words by going to the galley and throwing the rest of the contents of the coffee pot out of the window.
"Fine by me," Jim said with a hard voice. "If you want me you'll find me in the stable car."
Artie sat down on the couch and put his head in his hands. Living together in such close confinement wasn't going to be as easy as he'd thought.
To be continued
* Well done to those of you who remembered that this is the magazine Jim is reading at the start of 'The Night of the Turncoat'.
