A/N: What can I say other than I'm sorry? I had meant to write this chapter before I went on vacation in August but never got to finish it and then when I came back I was swamped with work. Seeing the last episode though really inspired me to continue writing this because I will not stand for Leo dying. So I hope this ridiculously long and fluffy chapter will make up for my lack of update over the last several months! You may notice I've kept some little references to the show in there but generally speaking I've changed things.
April awoke to the sunlight streaming in through the blinds. If she imagined hard enough she could almost feel the warmth from the sun's rays. She knew she was going to miss being outside but she never even realized how much she'd miss the warmth of the sun.
The blankets pulled over her provided sufficient warmth and she didn't quite feel like removing herself from that yet.
Her eyes cracked open for a second before fluttering closed again as she cuddled further into the mattress, letting out a small, contented sigh.
She let her eyes rest for a little while longer, even drifting back off into a light sleep. She had mostly recovered from her sudden illness the day before but it had taken its toll on her already weakened body and despite getting a good night's sleep she could still feel the exhaustion.
She wasn't sure of the time but she knew the nurses would be coming in to check on her soon and bring her breakfast and she wanted to sleep until the last possible minute.
When she felt herself slowly waking up again she let it happen. Her eyes slowly opened and she blinked herself awake, clearing the fog of sleep from her eyes and then her eyes found the clock.
The big red numbers read 8:15 and compared to what she was used to the last week and a half it was a nice change. The worst of the nausea had always seemed to always hit at the very early hours of the morning, startling her awake and sending her running to the bathroom before her brain could even wake up.
Then the damn machine would beep and send nurses running to her room and she'd be awake until the afternoon when a day of not eating much and chemo took too much out of her and she fell back to sleep.
She was glad to not have to wake up to that for once. This morning she felt better than she had since she'd been there.
Her eyes then drifted from the clock to the window where she could see the bright morning sun against blue sky through the tiny cracks in the blinds.
After a minute, she shifted her arm under her head and looked down at the cot beside her bed.
After a second her eyes widened as she realized the body sleeping on the bed was most definitely not her sister.
Though his face was hidden from her, his dirty blonde hair was unmistakable.
"Leo?" She whispered to herself and then squeezed her eyes shut for a moment, wondering if she was still dreaming, and then reopened them to find him still laying there.
Then yesterday's events hit her memory - how he was there when she felt sick, held her while she slept, went to the bathroom and never came back. How her mother told her he had been rushed to the Emergency Room and went she went over to check on him, they told her that she wasn't allowed in to see him. She worried until a sweet nurse came in and told her that he was awake. She thought about visiting him but in the end decided not to mostly due to her own exhaustion.
Her eyes widened further and she sat up quickly. "Leo!"
"What?" Leo shot up quickly, jolted from his sleep. He groaned a second later, his eyes closing as his head spun and pounded. It continued to pound for a few seconds before it slowly started to fade and he rubbed the side of his head as he reopened his eyes.
April was sitting up, her eyes wide in concern, meeting his gaze for a moment before her eyes flickered to the bandage wrapped around his head.
"What the hell are you doing here?" She asked.
He slowly twisted around to face her, the hint of a smirk tugging at the corners of his lips. "Well I was sleeping."
"Leo." She frowned. "You're hurt."
He brought his hand up to his head and felt the bandage still around his head. He scoffed quietly, shrugging his shoulders. "What this? It's nothing." He quickly uncurled it and neither of them failed to notice the splotch of dried blood before he curled it up and tossed it away. "Just a little bump on the head."
"What happened?" She asked quietly, the frown still on her lips.
He let out a little sigh and looked down for a brief moment. "I had gone to the bathroom and it just hit me, that's the way it usually goes." He shrugged as he looked back up at her. "Comes out of nowhere, gives me a few seconds warning. Sometimes I can fight it and push it back but this time..." He shook his head and paused, his stomach twisting at the fear in her eyes and he returned the smile to his lips. "But I'm fine...really."
She shook her head, clearly not believing him. "You hit your head."
He nodded slowly. "Bathroom floor...not the best cushion." He remarked lightly.
She swallowed thickly. "I...tried to come and see you. They said you were unconscious."
"April..." He looked at her seriously and it always unsettled her when he did that. "I'm fine."
She nodded slowly though the concern was still written on her features. "You didn't have to stay." She nodded to the cot, her lips twitching up in sarcastic amusement. "I'm sure it's not very comfortable."
"You know..." His lips twitched up too. "I think the actual patients get the short end of the stick because some of the hospital beds in this place are worse."
She let out a little huff of a laugh as she looked down shaking her head and Leo was grateful to see that smile again.
"Why did you stay?" She asked, looking back up at him a second later.
"I was going to go home but after what happened I wanted to check on you…" He paused, inhaling deeply. "And I didn't exactly feel well enough to drive home. Didn't need a motorcycle accident on top of all this." His lips twitched up in a smirk and his voice was light, trying to make humor out of the situation. His smile fell when he saw April looked anything but amused. "I didn't want all the questions from my parents." He concluded more seriously. "I just needed a night of peace and I sure as hell wasn't going to get that going home so I stayed."
April's face softened and she nodded in understanding. "Did you get it? Your night of peace?"
"I did." He nodded. "All the machine noises are actually soothing when they're not your own."
That earned a little smile from her and she shrugged lightly. "I don't know….I'm getting used to them."
"Not me." He sighed. "There are a lot of things I grew accustomed to spending so many nights in a hospital bed. Those damn noises…" He shook his head. "Not one of them. Plus all the wires and tubes," He scrunched up his nose, subconsciously rubbing his arm where his IV had been placed just hours before, "without all those things it's not so bad."
"So not being a patient, you mean?" She asked in amusement and he tapped the side of his nose in affirmation and she laughed quietly.
"But enough about me," He said quickly, "How are you doing? You look better."
April smiled slightly, nodding. "I am better...well as much as I can be I guess."
"No more fever?"
She shook her head. "I am fever free. I still feel weak and exhausted but I suppose that's not going to go away for a long time, is it?"
His face scrunched slightly. "Afraid not."
She sighed. "I thought as much."
"If it helps," He said with a light shrug, "I think you're handling it quite well."
She looked at him in silence for a few seconds and then smiled softly. "I have my moments."
"That's only human. It's not easy - I'd be worried if you didn't freak out."
She chuckled quietly. "Well...I have a great support system."
"You do." He agreed and averted his eyes momentarily, glancing wistfully at the ground. "You're lucky."
April frowned as she watched him. He always tried to take the focus off of him, even during times when his own cancer started acting up, and she realized now it was because he thought nobody cared. He brushed off the fact that his parents were too busy but the more time she spent with him the more she could see how truly it affected him.
"Hey Leo." She called to him softly and he lifted his head. She gave him a small, warm smile and slowly extended out her hand toward him.
He raised his brow, staring inquisitively at her out stretched hand and then his lips twitched and he stood, walking the few steps to the bed and took her hand, sitting on the edge of the bed.
She squeezed his hand and looked him in the eye. "I will always be there for you."
His brow twitched but his face went otherwise blank of emotion. His throat bobbed as he suddenly swallowed and had she not been watching him intently, she might have missed his jaw tightening.
He inhaled sharply and opened his mouth to reply but was subsequently cut off by a knock on the door.
They kept their gaze on each other for a longing second and then turned their attention to the door, their hands remaining together rested on her bed.
"April?" A voice called as the door opened. "Are you awake?"
The door opened to reveal a nurse carrying a breakfast tray and she paused, eyes widening in surprise as her eyes fell on Leo.
"Leo." Her voice shot up a little and she looked between the pair and April felt her face flush under her gaze and she finally slipped her hand off of his.
His fingers twitched at the loss of her touch but his face lit up in his usual smirk as looked at the nurse.
"Good morning, Nicki. How are you doing today?"
She narrowed her eyes slightly but her lips twitched up in amusement. "I should be asking you the same question." She replied as she walked into the room. "I heard you had quite the fall last night."
April glanced to him and he casually shrugged. "Nah, it was nothing."
She hummed incredulously but dropped the subject. "They said you left."
"Thought I'd spend the night with my good friend, April here."
At that Nicki smiled and turned her attention to April, placing the breakfast tray on the table beside her.
"How are you doing today, April? Feeling better?"
April nodded with a small smile. "Yes, thankfully."
"That's good to hear." Nicki then turned to the machines beside her bed, quickly looking at the stats. "Your vitals are looking good. We'll have to do a few tests just to make sure your levels are still at a good number after your sudden fever yesterday."
April nodded quietly and then looked over at Leo as he suddenly rose off the bed.
"Well I will leave you to that wonderfully fun activity...I should really be going. Don't want my parents to worry too much." She could almost feel the heavy sarcasm dripping from his words.
"Alright." She said softly. "Leo?" She followed him with her eyes as he crossed to the other side of the bed. She smiled warmly as she caught his eyes. "I'm glad you're alright."
He smiled back at her. "Right back at you."
They held each other's gaze for another few seconds and then he started for the door.
"Feel better, Leo." Nicki called after him and he paused in the doorway to thank her, smile once more at April, and then continued out the door, closing the door behind him.
April let out a quiet sigh and hadn't even realized the affectionate smile on her lips as she stared at the spot he stood just seconds ago.
Nicki watched her and smiled knowingly. "That is quite a good friend you have there."
April's cheeks flushed a deeper pink and her smile widened. "I know."
Leo hadn't been back to visit her in a couple days much to his dismay. When he got home, just as he suspected, his parents were bombarding him with questions. Well, his mother was. His father was once again out running his campaign and wouldn't be home until the following day.
Despite insisting he was fine and that he only stayed at the hospital because he didn't want to leave his motorcycle there alone over night, he endured his mother's blubbering about how she heard from the hospital but not from him, and how he didn't answer his phone, and she was worried sick.
Then he heard the whole thing from his father once he returned home - however that didn't last very long as he was pulled into yet another meeting.
His mother was insistent that he stay home and rest and he listened just to get her to stop bothering him about it. That and also, the massive headaches hadn't stopped long enough for him to go out and do anything.
And just as he had suspected, within three days his little episode was completely forgotten about and they were back to ignoring him.
They did care, he reminded himself, but only when he was on the brink of death. The little daily headaches didn't faze them. Granted, he didn't tell them about it but he was sure it would go unnoticed.
It was on the fourth day at home when he woke up with just a dull ache in his head, one that he was more than capable of dealing with, and mostly, he was sure, due to the boredom of being trapped up in his home.
He showered, got dressed and ate something, briefly telling his mother that he was going out.
She glanced up, giving him a once over, and satisfied that he looked well enough to venture out nodded to him.
He let out a sigh of relief as soon as he stepped into the parking garage. He always had a few choices to make when it came to driving - all of his father's sports cars available to him.
His lips twitched up when his eyes fell upon one in particular that reminded him of the one he had "stolen" to test drive with April.
And as tempting as driving one of the cars was he went immediately to his motorcycle. Nothing felt more freeing than straddling the bike with nothing surrounding him but the wind whipping past.
His lips curled into a smile as the engine roared to life and he drove off, leaving the boring house behind him.
In the past spending any more time at the hospital that was necessary was completely unthinkable. In fact there were a million other things he could be doing - adventurous, dangerous things. Yet he pulled into the familiar parking lot without a regret.
He knew where he wanted to be - or more importantly who he wanted to be with and if the only place he could see her was the hospital than that is where he would go.
As much as he missed the open air and the outside world being cooped up inside the last three days, he found he missed her just as much.
He passed a few nurses in the hallway, all surprised to see him and asking if he was alright. After explaining he was there as a visitor, they smiled and sent him on his way.
The Leo from a few weeks ago would have laughed at him if he saw him now. Spending what precious time he had left in a hospital and not to mention going completely soft over a girl.
April Carver was not just a girl though. She was his cancer friend, possibly the only person in his life who understood what he was going through. Oh he had been to cancer support groups, all filled with people who were going through the same thing and he found camaraderie with them but he connected with April on an intensely emotional level unlike he ever felt with anyone before, cancer patient or no.
So he walked proudly to her room, happy smile and all, because he was happy. For once since his diagnosis he was truly happy and it was because of her. Imminent death or no...He couldn't help feel the weight on his shoulders lift whenever he was around her.
As he neared the door to her room, he could hear low voices from inside and wondered if her family or possibly the doctor was with her. He paused seeing if he could make out any voices but he heard nothing but muffled voices through the thick door and then knocked before trying the door.
The first thing he saw was Beth leaning up against the bathroom door and then the empty bed and his smile dropped, his brow furrowing in concern.
He hitched his thumb toward the bathroom door. "Is she in there? Is she alright?"
Beth nodded, straightening up but smiling sadly. "She's alright she's just...having a bit of an emotional moment."
Leo raised his brow and suddenly April's voice came through the door. "Are you talking to someone? Who's there, Beth?"
"It's Leo, April." Beth called back through the door.
"Leo?" Her voice squeaked in surprise and then she groaned and he felt a small tug at his heartstrings. He hadn't heard that reluctant tone to her voice when saying his name in a while and it stung a little.
"Everything all right in there?" He answered back.
He heard her sigh. "Leo...please, look...now is not a...a good time." She sounded frazzled and like Beth had said, emotional.
He turned a questioning gaze to Beth and she pressed her lips together, shrugging lightly. "Her hair." She mouthed to him and his eyes widened in realization and then he nodded in understanding.
He motioned his head for Beth to step away and she eyed him warily for a moment. He lifted his brow back at her and she sighed quietly before stepping away.
"Is this door locked, April?" He asked, his hand moving to the door knob.
"You know very well that it can't be locked." April shot back weakly.
"Are you naked?" Was his next question and Beth's brow shot up.
"What?" April cried from inside. "No!"
"Good, then I'm coming in." He waited a few seconds, to see if she would protest but at her silence he pushed the door slowly open.
April was standing in front of the mirror, her arms over her chest, her face pale and pulled down into a deep frown. She didn't turn to look at him as he came in and even avoided his gaze through the mirror.
Her hair was thin on her head but still there except for a few patches where it had begun to fall out.
It was not as bad as she probably imagined it to be but the expression on her face told him that it was enough to hurt her.
She stood quietly as he approached her. He stopped just behind her, his chest just barely touching her back and his hands fell onto her shoulders in a comforting gesture.
She let out a slow, shuddering breath and seemed to relax slightly at his touch. Finally her eyes flickered to his reflection and met his eyes there, locking gazes.
She slowly tilted backwards, closing the final gap between their bodies and leaned against his chest.
His eyes drifted from her reflection down to her hands which were clenched together at her chest, and his clenched at the dark brown locks clutched tightly into her fists. His hands slid down her arms, unintentionally pushing them even closer together until his hands covered hers and he slowly uncurled her fingers.
He took the long strands of hair out of her palms and placed them on the sink. When he looked back up at her, her eyes were glistening with unshed tears and her bottom lip trembled.
"April." He whispered her name and a small sob escaped her lips and her eyes closed tightly as a few tears rolled down her cheeks.
"I know!" She exclaimed as he gently spun her around to face him, keeping a comforting hold on her upper arms. She shook her head quickly before opening her eyes, blinking past the tears. She didn't look at him but instead at the spot on his chest where the collar of his shirt met his skin. "I know, it's stupid. I should have been expecting it and I was. I knew it was coming but...I guess I wasn't as prepared as I thought for it to actually happen." She shook her head, slower this time. "Being sick, day after day, spending my days stuck in this place...it was a reminder that I do have cancer but this," She flipped her hand up toward her hair, "This..." She continued more softly, finally lifting her eyes to meet his. "This makes it real, doesn't it?" She finished in a whisper.
It constantly stunned her how comfortable she was around Leo. Out of anyone she thought she'd be most comfortable talking about her hair loss with her mother, Brenna or Beth. And they'd comfort her without a doubt, make her feel better about it in the best way they could but they'd always have that sad, pitiful look in their eyes. That look was lacking in Leo's eyes. He only looked at her with a calm understanding, his eyes held some sadness, yes but only because he felt the exact pain she was feeling at one point.
"Yes." He said softly but he drew in his lips as he inhaled slowly and her lips twitched in preparation of one his usual snarky comments.
"But it's just hair, right?" He lifted his shoulders, keeping his gaze intent on hers and she knew his comment was intended to comfort not hurt. "It grows back."
She swallowed thickly, nodding her head and then sighed. "Yeah I know...but-" She shrugged her shoulders in return.
He pursed his lips, his eyes squinting as he slowly turned his head from side to side as if examining her.
She narrowed her eyes suspiciously. "What are you doing?"
"I think the bald look could work on you." He finally told her and she scoffed, gently shoving at his chest.
"Shut up."
His lips curled into a smile and scoffed back at her. "I mean it!"
She gave him an incredulous look and he simply lifted his hand toward her face. Her face softened as she watched his movements carefully. The back of his knuckles brushed across the top of her forehead and he slid his hand down the hair framing her face, lightly twisting the thin strand around his pointer finger before finally pushing it behind her ear and then without hesitation resting his hand over one of her bald spots.
Her breath hitched as his fingers brushed across her scalp and her eyes once again stung with tears.
Her eyes fluttered closed as he tilted her head toward him and he leaned in, pressing a tender kiss to her forehead.
His lips burned against her skin and sent a flood of warmth from her head to her toes, pooling heavily in the pit of her stomach.
She let out a small sigh, tilting her head into his hand still cradling the side of her head.
"Hair, no hair..." His voice roused her and her eyes opened to meet his and her heart was pounding in her chest. "...or some hair...you're still gorgeous."
Her lips slowly curled up in a smile and she slowly shook her head. "You're ridiculous." She scoffed quietly and then bit her lip. "But thank you."
He smirked at her and there was such an honesty in his eyes when he looked at her, she felt the stress of the whole situation just lift off her shoulders.
She just now realized her hands were rested on his chest and she could feel his heart beat strong beneath her palm. It was a silly thought perhaps, after all his heart beat every single day but that simple reminder of his life made her realize how much she appreciated him being there.
Her lips twitched up and she didn't realize she hadn't taken her eyes off his chest until he spoke, a twinge of amusement in his voice.
"Penny for your thoughts?"
Her smile grew a little wider as she was pulled out of her thoughts as she looked at him. She decided they had had enough of sappy moments for the time being. Leo didn't get sappy very often and the amused glint in his eyes showed her that his sappy moment had passed so she didn't dare tell him what her actual thoughts were.
"Nothing." She shook her head and he raised his brow but before he could get in a word, she continued.
"Everyone tells me that it'd be less traumatic to just cut it all off at once. What do you think?"
He nodded. "I've always found the Band-Aid method very effective."
She turned her head. "You think I should then?" She asked hesitantly.
He shrugged. "I think you should do what you want."
She groaned, rolling her eyes, gently pushing at his chest. "I don't know, that's why I'm asking you...you've been through all this. As my cancer friend...what do you think?"
His eyes flickered to her hair and his lips twitched slightly before looking back to her eyes. "It's not my decision...and I don't want you hating me because I told you to cut your hair off."
"I'm not going to hate you." She sighed in exasperation but then fell silent as she bit her lip in thought. She swallowed over the sudden lump in her throat as she met his eyes. "Would you do it for me?"
His brow shot up in surprise. "You want me to shave your head?"
She nodded quietly. "Please."
He blinked at her in shock and then nodded slowly. "If it is what the lady wants then the lady shall have it."
She shot him a bemused look, narrowing her eyes slightly and he smirked back at her.
"You sure?" He asked a moment later and she let out a slow breath before nodding.
"Yes I'm sure. I don't want to see it falling out every day...I couldn't deal with that. It sucks either way and shaving it all is the lesser of two evils, I suppose and there is no one I'd rather have do it than you."
"Okay." He nodded once. "Your wish is my command. Just say when."
She swallowed once, hard before answering. "Now."
Once again his brow shot up. "Now?"
"Yes now." She repeated. "I just...I want to get it over with. Band-Aid method, right?"
He pursed his lips and nodded his agreement. "Yeah, alright. I will get my supplies." He waggled his brow mischievously and she smirked at him, shaking her head in fond amusement.
They stayed where they were for a few more long seconds, neither wanting to part from the other's embrace but eventually Leo stepped away, his hands trailing down her arms, pausing to hold and squeeze her hands briefly before dropping them to his sides. "Be right back, then."
She nodded, smiling slightly and he returned her smile briefly before turning and walking out of the bathroom.
He quickly caught Beth's eyes from across the room, nodded to her once and then disappeared out of the room.
April let out a soft, quiet sigh before walking out of the bathroom.
She felt her face suddenly flush as she caught sight of her best friend sitting on her bed, eyeing her with a knowing smirk.
"What?" She asked innocently though the smile on her lips was more than enough to give her away.
"What indeed." Beth shot back, smiling herself. "Girl goes in bathroom on the verge of an emotional breakdown, handsome rich boy goes in after her, and both come out grinning like idiots."
April ducked her head, trying to hide the smile on her lips and blush on her cheeks to no avail. "Leo just...gets it is all."
"He's getting something alright." Beth muttered and April's eyes widened and she gaped at her friend.
"Beth!"
Beth shot up her hands. "I am just saying. Not like it hasn't happened before."
"It was once and neither of us were hospitalized at the time, thank you." April shot back at her, rolling her eyes as she came to sit beside her on the bed.
Beth hummed, narrowing her eyes and April nudged her gently.
"Alright, I'll drop it...but where did your prince charming go?"
April glowered for a moment at the comment but let it go. "He...went to get a razor." She said quietly.
Beth's smile faded and her eyes widened. "What, seriously?"
April bit her lip, nodding. "I think it's just easier...everyone says it is." She shrugged and let out a sigh.
Beth nodded and reached out for her hand. Their fingers laced and she gave her hand a gentle squeeze. "It will be alright. Plus this means you get to wear some pretty awesome wigs."
April barked a small laugh, a smile tugging at her lips. "Yeah. Plus side to everything, right?"
She leaned her head against Beth's shoulder and Beth leaned her head against hers. They sat in a comforting silence until Leo appeared back in the doorway, holding up a razor with a smirk and that glint in his eyes.
"I'll leave you two to it then." Beth said and gave April's hand one last squeeze before hopping off the bed.
She paused in front of Leo in the doorway and gave him a warning glance. "I don't know how you could mess this up but if you do...you're answering to me."
Leo's brow shot up and he lifted his free hand to his forehead in mock salute. "Yes ma'am."
She narrowed her eyes at him, huffed quietly, and then looked over her shoulder at April who gave her a small smile. She waved at her and then moved past Leo out of the room.
"Alright then." Leo walked into the room, pulling out one of the chairs into the center of the room and then plugging in the razor before turning to her and patting the seat.
April sat on the bed, her fists clenched tight in her lap, staring wide eyed at the chair. She swallowed and then slowly rose up from the bed and walked over to the chair.
She closed her eyes briefly as she sat down, clasping her hands together in her lap.
She winced slightly as she heard the razor click on and the buzzing rang loud in her ear and once she felt Leo's hand on her shoulder, she jerked away.
"Wait!" She cried, bringing her hands to her hair.
Leo moved the razor away from her head and she peered sheepishly over her shoulder at him.
"I'm sorry...I just...I don't know if I can..."
He clicked the razor off and placed it down on the table nearby, pressing his lips together in thought.
"Tell you what..." He started, turning back to her and she eyed him inquisitively. "I'll show you mine if you show me yours."
Her brow shot up and he elaborated, "Head wise."
She turned her head, her brow now furrowing. "What do you mean?"
"I shave you and you shave me."
Her eyes flickered to his head, full of lovely brown hair, unaffected by the chemo she was currently suffering.
"You'd shave your head?" She asked incredulously.
He shrugged. "Yeah why not? Been there, done that. No big deal."
She shook her head slowly. "You have no reason to. I mean...you're not getting chemo treatments."
He stared at her in silence for a few seconds debating on mentioning the recent change of mind regarding his surgery. The last few days stuck inside had really made him think about it and he was pretty much decided on it at this point. He knew he had to tell her...probably soon but he decided against it for now and simply shrugged.
"It's just hair, it grows back."
Her lips twitched slightly. "Leo, you don't have to..."
"Yeah but its already decided so, what do you say, mine for yours?" He lifted the razor, waving it back and forth.
She eyed the dreaded device for a few seconds and then met his eyes again, heaving a sigh and then nodding. "Alright...let's do it."
"You look like an alien."
April and Leo sat on her hospital bed, her near the pillows, him at the foot, facing each other. Both of their heads successfully shaved, they retreated there and had just been taking in the appearance of each other in silence for the last minute.
"You look like a baby." He shot back without a thought and her lips pulled into a smile before a laugh bubbled out of her lips. She leaned forward, burying her head in her hands, muffling the sound of her laughter.
Leo grinned as he watched her, a few sniggers of laughter escaping him as well.
He had been right - the bald look did suit her as well as it could. She was beautiful, with hair and without and especially with that smile, illuminating her face and the sound of her laughter was music in the air.
"Oh my god." She breathed out as she sat back up, a few little giggles still escaping her lips, and placed her hands over her head, the smile still on her lips. "I can't believe I did that."
She felt around her bald scalp, her face twisting up in a way he found absolutely adorable. "It's not too bad is it?"
"Could be worse."
"How?" She laughed incredulously.
He paused, pressing his lips together. "Alright I was lying." He admitted casually and she broke out into another fit of giggling, once again burying her face in her hands.
She let out a low groan, running her hands over her face until they fell down on her lips and she couldn't help but smile at the way Leo was smirking at her.
She let out a soft sigh, focusing her eyes on his newly shaved head and slowly shook her head. "I appreciate the fact that you did it but Leo...you really didn't have to."
His eyes widened just the slightest bit, too fractionally for her to notice any alarming change, as he realized that the perfect opportunity to tell her was presenting itself.
There was no use delaying the inevitable any longer.
In his usual non-chalance he shrugged his shoulder. "I figured it'd be easier."
The corner of her mouth twitched up. "Oh yeah like the neatly cropped hair you had must have been such a daily hassle for you."
"It was actually." He defended and her chest shook with quiet laughter.
"But that's not what I meant." He continued and she pressed her brow together.
"Then what did you mean?"
"Technically they only needed to shave the one spot," He used the tip of his pointer finger to circle around the place on the back of his head where the tumor rested, "but if they're going to shave something, why not just shave all of it?"
April stared at him silently, all traces of a smile fading from her lips as she tried to process what his words were implying.
"Wait..." She said softly. "Shave your head...for what exactly?"
"Brain surgery is a lot easier with a shaved head."
April blinked at him and then her eyes widened and she leaned forward. "Brain surgery? What-" Her mouth opened and closed, gaping at him like a fish and he smirked at her in amusement.
"You should see your face right now - priceless."
"Shut up!" She leaned across and gently shoved at his bended knees. "You're getting the surgery?"
"I believe that's what I just said, yeah."
April slowly shook her head. "You seemed very anti the idea the last time we spoke about it."
"I changed my mind." He answered simply.
"Why?" She asked quietly. "I mean...it just seemed like nothing would ever change your mind about it."
He inhaled slowly before replying, "I thought nothing ever would."
"Then what did?"
He was silent for a few seconds, keeping his eyes focused on hers, with an intent stare that were speaking the words he was too afraid to say aloud.
Her back straightened up as a realization swept over her face.
"Leo...don't say it was me..."
His heart pounded in his chest as he held her gaze for another few seconds and then he scoffed. "What? You? Don't flatter yourself, there. And they say I'm the pig-headed one."
She narrowed her eyes at him in mock annoyance and he returned a smirk at her, hiding the fact that his stomach was turning in knots.
He had scoffed it off but she had hit it right on the head. She was the reason or at least the main reason behind his change of mind. He wanted her to know it too and he scolded himself for brushing it off.
He let out a quiet sigh, quickly growing serious and the sudden change in his features immediately captured April's attention and she frowned, leaning in toward him again.
"What is the reason?"
"I didn't see the point before." He told her. "I accepted that I was going to die and was content with living my life, making something of myself, until that day came. The risk of something going wrong was too great for me to take."
"I know the reason why you weren't going to...why did you change your mind?"
He swallowed over the lump in his throat and clenched his jaw as he met her eyes.
"I found something worth the risk."
Her breath hitched, her eyes widening. "Leo..." She whispered.
He lips twitched in a small smile and he lifted his shoulders in a shrug. "Besides, what kind of cancer friend would I be if I didn't live to see you kick cancer's ass?"
She smiled tearfully and then slowly moved onto her knees and inched towards him. He watched her every move, his brow twitching.
She paused just in front of him, locked gazes with him, smiling slowly and then she leaned in wrapping her arms lightly around his neck.
His brow shot up in surprise but then his arms lifted to surround her small frame, pulling her gently against him.
Her warm body pressed against his briefly brought his mind back to that wonderful night of passion they shared on the couch after Jackson's funeral. He quickly pushed back the thought but smiled against her shoulder anyway finally fully aware of what his decision meant. If it was successful he could have endless moments like these, wrapped in her warm embrace.
April closed her eyes, resting her head against his, enjoying the feel of bare skin pressed against bare skin. It was an indicator of their shared disease, connecting them on several different levels, but it was also a sign of hope. Her chemo treatments would work and his surgery would be successful and they'd both come out of it alive and cancer free.
She wrestled with the fear of losing him and she knew there was still the chance that she could. Brain surgery was dangerous and risky and that was why Leo had refused it for so long but at least with it there was a slight chance he would live.
"I take it you think its good news then." She could practically hear his smile and a shiver ran down her spine at the rumble of his voice against her ear.
She tightened her hold on him for a few seconds and then released, pulling back to look down at him.
She was practically sitting in his lap, her hands resting on his shoulders and his eyes shone as he looked up at her.
She suddenly had the overwhelming urge to kiss him, though if she was honest with herself that urge had not gone away since she last kissed him.
Her heart leapt as his eyes flickered down to her lips and then back up to her eyes and it was like a spark had come to life between them and they couldn't stop what would happen next if they wanted to.
Her hands trailed up his neck and then settled on the sides of his head, her thumbs resting on his cheeks. Then she lowered her head and her lips met his and warmth flooded their bodies at first contact.
He inhaled sharply through his nose, his arms tightening around her, one hand sliding up her back, the other resting at her hip as he kissed her back, soft and tender.
It was only a few seconds before she could feel the strain of lack of oxygen tugging at her lungs and she reluctantly broke the kiss, keeping their foreheads pressed together and eyes closed.
After another few moments she started to feel the weakness in her legs and lowered herself back onto the bed, her hands falling back to his shoulders.
His eyes opened as he felt her pull away and he smiled slightly as he met her gaze.
She smiled back at him for a few seconds and then her smile slowly faded, her eyes growing serious and a little wary.
"Are you sure about this Leo? I never wanted to pressure you into changing your mind."
The corner of his lips twitched up. "You didn't pressure me to do anything. You gave your opinion and I didn't listen to it."
She scoffed a small laugh and he smirked in return.
"I knew that you wanted me to get it - and even then for a little while it still wasn't enough to change my mind. Then I saw you in this place, I saw you sick, and I saw you fighting and I realized...I wanted to see you beat this thing. Then a couple days ago when I fell, I woke up worried about you, thinking about how you must have felt when I never came back...and I didn't want to make you feel that way. And I guess most importantly...I was glad that I had woken up and scared as hell thinking... what if next time I didn't? Then I realized...yes, I'm terminal but dying is not my only option. It's the safe option, the easy option...but it wasn't the option I wanted anymore." He sighed heavily, practically rolling his eyes at the thoughts in his head and then allowing himself to be sappy for this one moment. "I needed a reason to live - you gave me that reason and I'll be damned if I'm letting it go."
Her hands had left his shoulders and were now clasped with his, resting on his lap. She gave his hands a squeeze and smiled at him softly, at a loss for what to say.
She had silently hoped that Leo would change his mind about the surgery but she never expected him to, not really. She didn't know what to think about being the reason he did change his mind...being the reason he wanted to live.
She thought back to what Brenna had said about taking the chance of a relationship with Leo. Now more than ever it seemed taking that chance was worth the risk.
If he survived the surgery, and if this chemo worked on her, they would be able to live life normally - have a normal relationship without the threat of death right at their feet.
His confession only just proved that he felt the same way about her that she did about him. He wanted to be with her too and now they actually stood a chance.
"When is it?" She asked after a minute of silence. "Your surgery?"
He blinked a few times, his brow twitching in slight confusion as he was pulled out of his thoughts. "Oh," He said once he came to and shrugged, "I don't know...I haven't exactly scheduled it yet...or told anyone else besides you that I decided to have it."
Her brow shot up. "Not even the doctor? Why not?"
"Well it all happened rather quickly - my decision, I mean. One minute I was sure I didn't want it, then I wasn't sure what the hell I wanted, and then I was sure I did. I will talk to her soon though...before it's too late."
"Too late?" April frowned, her heart dropping and Leo nodded seriously.
"They did an MRI after my fall a few days ago. Leo Jr decided he wasn't quite finished growing."
April's eyes widened and fear flooded her. "It grew?"
"Yep." He popped the "p". "She told me the surgery option was still on the table...for now. That's what really got me thinking about it, I guess. I needed to take the opportunity before it passed me by. I'm not really sure I believe in fate or destiny or whatever but you coming into my life, shaking things up, right when Leo Jr decides to grow a little bit more? Well I'm not blind to signs."
Her heart lurched. If she hadn't met Leo he never would have considered the surgery at all. He would have let the brain tumor kill him and the world would be without Leo Hendrie. And so would she. She wouldn't have known the difference...in fact his death would be nothing but a story to her. Bruce Hendrie would probably drop out of the race and his competitor would become elected by default - the newspapers would go crazy.
Now he was so much more than a story and her stomach churned uncomfortably for ever reducing him to such a thing. Even if he did act like a complete ass in the beginning.
He was her friend, a true friend, different from her longtime friendship with Beth but just as emotionally connected if not more so. They had kissed, several times, and even slept together, which she realized still hadn't been talked about since that night.
Then again, maybe it didn't need to be talked about. Their feelings for each other had been all but said in plain words between them. It had happened spur of the moment and they avoided talking about it because they were afraid, or at least she was, to acknowledge her feelings for a man who could be taken from her at any moment. However it was not just a meaningless fling and she knew he thought so too. Leo tried to cover up his emotions but she could see the truth in his eyes every time he looked at her. Not to mention his confession of her being the reason he chose to live. That pretty much spoke for itself.
Whatever there was between them it was real and tangible, undeniable to either of them, or anyone around them.
She wasn't sure if she believed in fate or destiny either but maybe it was a sign.
A sign that everything would be alright. That they would be alright.
Their cancer could destroy both their lives but it brought them together where life otherwise wouldn't have. He would support her through her chemo, give her the strength to carry through, and she would inspire him to get lifesaving surgery.
A small smile flickered back to life on her lips and in response, his did too.
"A sign." She murmured, looking down at the joined hands and slowly shifted her hand so their fingers now interlocked and she rubbed her thumb softly against his.
He let out a small scoff and her eyes lifted back to his. "I know it sounds ridiculous."
Her smile widened slightly and she shook her head. "No...It doesn't."
He lifted one eyebrow and she almost laughed at how pronounced the action looked against his now bald head.
"Maybe you are supposed to live...maybe we both are." She explained. "It's a really sucky way to do it but maybe this was the universe's way to bring us together."
"Or maybe the universe is cruel and wants us to get close only for one of us to die."
Her face immediately fell and she gaped at him, digging her fingernails into the back of his hand. "Leo!"
He winced, grinning sheepishly. "Sorry. Force of habit."
She scoffed, rolling her eyes. "You don't really think that, do you?"
He squinted his eyes slightly in thought and then shrugged. "Nah, not really. I probably wouldn't be getting the surgery if I did. Just the opposite really...I'm doing it to prove the universe wrong. I have a reason to live, to beat this thing, and I'm going to. Or at least, I hope I'm going to."
Hope. That was the key word in this situation. All they had to rely on was hope.
She relaxed somewhat, a half smile tugging at the corner of her mouth, though a knot still sat heavy in her stomach.
"Me too." She said quietly. She let out a slow breath, drawing her shoulders together as a sudden chill passed over her. She couldn't tell if she was actually cold or if it was that small prick of worry washing over her.
Leo must have noticed her shiver because his brow pressed together in concern. "Are you cold?"
After another few seconds and feeling the familiar chill seep down into her bones, she nodded, wrapping her arms around her chest. She sent him a half smile. "I guess I never realized how warm hair actually was."
The chill did in fact stem from the top of her head, spreading downwards. She would have to get a wig and the sooner the better.
Before she realized what was happening Leo was sitting up and moving towards her.
She looked after him, confused, as he crawled past her to rest behind her against her pillows. Then he reached out and pulled her arm away from her chest, gently tugging her toward him.
Once she realized what he was doing, she relaxed and smiled, inching herself slowly backwards until she was half rested against the pillows, half rested against him.
His arm surrounded her shoulders and pulled her tighter against him and she let out a contented sigh as his body heat immediately radiated against her.
She snuggled further into him, resting her head against his chest, reaching for his free hand and entwining their fingers together.
It sent a weird tingle down her spine when she felt his lips brush against the exposed skin on the top of her head. Having no hair she may never get used to...but that feeling was maybe one she could.
She let out yet another sigh, closing her eyes, relishing in the simple comfort of his embrace.
Her smile widened as she felt his chest rumble under her cheek with quiet laughter. "Comfortable, are you?"
She hummed, nuzzling her nose into his chest. "You're like my own personal heater."
"Oh good." He answered dryly. "Glad I'm useful for something."
She smirked, weakly squeezing his hand, his warmth already starting to lull her.
She had to admit it was a lot nicer to lay with him when she wasn't dazed with fever and could actually appreciate it.
His thumb started to lazily rub across her upper arm and if he continued she knew she wouldn't be able to stay awake for much longer.
It was usually around this time that her body grew weak and she required a nap to refresh and she was more than content to fall asleep in Leo's arms.
"Leo?" She whispered, quickly falling out of consciousness.
"Yes?"
"Don't leave, 'k?"
He gently squeezed her arm and once again she felt a feather light kiss against her head.
"Wouldn't dream of it."
She smiled against him and finally let herself fall asleep, her worries and fears slipping away with her, wrapped warm and happy in his arms.
