"Offly hot outside to be wearing that eh?" the doctor said in an annoying Canadian accent. Kurt shrugged and let his father talk. He kept his voice low so Kurt

wouldn't hear.

"Okay I guess I should have brought him sooner...it all really started after he was like nine or so, but now he seems totally withdrawn and he won't eat!" Burt exclaimed babbling worriedly. "He even still wets the bed sometimes"

"Hm...strange" the doctor nodded and looked back up at Kurt. Well I guess we better take your vitals" he said and gestured to Kurt to hop up on the scale.

Kurt did with a angry frown. Why did he have to be here?

"and how old are you?" he asked scribbling on a notebook. "sixteen" Kurt muttered and they all watched the numbers.

95pounds

"my...oh my you're very small" he said and wrote some more. Kurt shoved his hands in his hoodie pockets and looked down.

"I dance a lot" he mumbled.

"let's have a listen to your heart" he said and did the normal ritual.

"Kurt have you experienced any traumatic things or are you self-mutilating? Cutting, burning or pricking"? He asked writing some more.

Kurt shook his head, "why would I?" he lied rolling his eyes.

"no binging and purging or acute food refusal?" he asked and Kurt shook his head again. "Ok well we took blood samples and they will be looked at other than

that...I want to see him back soon" the doctor said and pulled Burt aside.

"watch after him a lot...something is obviously off".

Burt felt angry aren't they suppose to know about this stuff?

They headed out, Kurt wrapped his arms around his stomach like it hurt.

"So um if there's anything you want to tell me...feel free" Burt said

starting the car.

"nothing you shouldn't already notice" Kurt said in a angry tone.

Why won't he figure out?

XxXxXx

When they arrived home Finn held his hand out, Kurt looked at it. "what do you want me to do?" he grumbled. "high five dude" he smiled

stupidly.

Kurt shook his head and moved on.

He walked to his room, his anxiety high. He went to his bathroom and pulled out his secret stash of cigarettes. No he didn't smoke...okay maybe a little but it curbs appetite.

He light it and took a few drags, then took his his jacket. He turned his arm over revealing his mutilated wrist. Jagged cuts all over. Each

one telling a story of his worst days.

Taking one last drag he placed the cigarette on his wrist. Twisting it like he was putting it out. He had to bit his lip to keep from

screaming out.

He exhaled fast when he dropped the remaining rest of the cigarette in the garbage. The burn was round and red, bubbling up. He walked out of his bathroom and sighed laying down. He needed to practice, Mr. Shuester expected them to sing tomorrow. Then he had

dance classes.

He shuddered at the thought of being in the same room with Him.

He wished he could just curl up and stay asleep forever. Just dream about him and his mother.

"dinner Kurt" Finn said walking in. "ok..." Kurt whispered more to himself. "Kay..." he stood there. Kurt looked up, "can I help you?" he asked and Finn looked around nervously. "um Burt wanted me to make sure you came down" he replied. Kurt sighed and followed him down. At the dinner table a bowl of salad was thrust at him.

"just try" Burt said with a hopeful voice.

Kurt groaned. He didn't want to have to puke. Why wouldn't his father leave him alone?

"do I have to?" he asked and Burt nodded. They sat there until Kurt busted into tears. Everyone stared. Shocked.

"why do you hate me?" he sobbed and got up. He walked out angrily but

not before slamming his fist into the wall.

Burt sat there speechless, he looked over at Carole an she gave a him wide eyed look. "what's his problem?" Finn asked when they heard his door slam.

"maybe it's just a hormonal thing" Carole suggested to Burt. "no...he's had strange outbursts like that since he was little. I think it's because of his mom" he said and shrugged.

"I don't know" He muttered shaking his head.

XxXxXx

Kurt woke up before everyone else, when he passed Finns door he looked in. He was sprawled out, snoring yet looking completely content. Kurt

wished he could sleep like that.

He wished he could be normal like Finn. A star have everyone at his feet. Not as stupid...but other than that Finn has a great life.

Kurt shook his head and walked to the kitchen. "hey" he heard and jumped with a yelp. His father walked in. "couldn't you warn me?" Kurt

growled and started cleaning up the water he spilled.

"sorry I have to go to the shop early...and I thought we could spend time together" Burt shrugged and grabbed some coffee. "joy" Kurt

mumbled sitting down.

"so what's new? Anything going on?" Burt asked taking a seat just as

Carole walked out.

Kurt eyed him suspiciously. "no" he replied.

"Hm" he nodded.

"you know you can tell me anything right?" Burt said and Kurt nodded

mutely.

Burt got up just as Kurt did and tried to pull him into a hug. Kurt jerked back and walked out. Burt looked at Carole with a hurt expression.

XxXxXx

"Earth to white boy" Mercedes said walking in the class room. Kurt opened his eyes and lifted his head from his hand. "huh?" he said.

"how long've you been here?" she asked taking a seat next to him.

"too long" he groaned as the teacher started drowning on. He found it hard to keep his eyes open.

He shook his head and rubbed his eyes. Tapped his foot and fiddled with his pencil.

He rested his hand on his cheek and slowly let his eyes close...

Kurt was in a room. It was small and suffocating. He stood confused. Where was he? He tried to move forward but something clanked. He looked down, he was chained. "what?" he thought. He opened his mouth wanting to scream. But nothing came out. It was dark, a thick scary darkness.

But there was a familiar smell of axe cologne that He always wore.

Suddenly someone came up behind him grabbing his shoulders. His face next to his ear. His hot breath blowing on his ear.

You're so beautiful...he growled.

Kurt wanted to twist away, run to his father but no he couldn't he was paralyzed.

Nobody has to know...

Kurt let a scream rip through his throat, his eyes flying open to the bright classroom.

Except all eyes were on him, Mercedes was staring at him worriedly. Sweat dripped down his face and his body shook.

"um..." he mumbled and the teacher walked over. "are you okay?" he asked touched Kurts arm. "don't touch me. Don't touch me" Kurt said gathering his books. "I-I didn't mean to" he said and watched Kurt leave.

He didn't even know where he was going until he found himself outside in the warm sun.

The breeze no where to be found. Kurt walked to his car throwing his stuff in the seat in the back. fumbling with the key then dropping them. Kurt groaned and let tears fall down. He sobbed setting his forehead on the steering wheel. His shoulders shook and his stomach churned.

He was such a freak.

Suddenly there was a knock on the window. He gasped, wiped his eyes and rolled down the window.

"can I help you?" damn the quiver in his voice.

"my name is Blaine" he said and held his hand out, Kurt stared at it.

"okay um...this is gonna sound weird but can I get a ride?" he asked and Kurt furrowed his eyebrows

"s-sure?" Kurt said and Blaine smiled. This boy was definitely strange yet oddly compelling. With his tangerine-hazel eyes and slick curly hair.

He settled in the seat and buckled his belt. "hey thanks man I thought I'd be stuck here" he said Kurt stared at him in disbelief.

"what?" he asked smiled awkwardly at Kurts gaze. "why are you trusting a stranger to take you home? Don't you know it's dangerous to just walk right up to strangers?" Kurt said feeling angry. This boy had a chance. He didn't have to go through what he did. He wasn't used and broken like Kurt was

"um I was under the impression if you did turn out to be a pedophile or murder I could easily get away I mean..." he smiled. "you're tiny". With a slight laugh.

Kurt cracked a smile. "whatever where to?" he asked and Blaine bit his lip. "do you know where Dalton Academy is?" he asked and Kurt raise an eyebrow. "yeah and what are you doing here? Its two hours away" he asked.

"definitely not spying on the competition" Blaine said looking at his hands. Kurt backed the car up, "busted" he laughed a little.

XxXxXx

"forgive me for not asking your name" Blaine said shaking his hand. "Kurt...Kurt Hummel" he told him and looked down. This boy was definitely handsome.

"so I guess I'll see you around?" Blaine said and Kurt looked up. "r-really?" he didn't mean to sound like a stupid schoolgirl.

"sure" he smiled and they exchanged phone numbers.

Kurt drove back to his house and busted through the doors.

"hey kiddo" Burt said helping Carole with dinner. "father I'm in love" Kurt said waving at Finn who was playing a hand held at the table.

"How much money?" he asked looking up from the recipe book. Kurt crossed his arms, "it's not clothes...but there is this one outfit" he

started but Burt cut him off. "so it's a..." he started.

"yes dad it's a boy" Kurt finished smiling.

"how did you meet him?" he asked focusing on trying to mix some batter.

"um that's not really relevant...he was a hitchhiker" he mumbled and Burt looked up. "Kurt! How old is this boy? Jesus Christ!" he exclaimed.

"chill father, he's like sixteen or seventeen and he needed a ride back to Dalton" Kurt said nibbling on a carrot stick.

"well watch yourself" he replied and Kurt rolled his eyes.

Kurt sat and argued with Finn about what song would be best for sectionals.

"Oh god..." Kurt thought a moment. He looked at the time 6:35

"shit I'm going to be late for dance" he said and got up a familiar ache starting in his stomach.

"Oh no your teacher called...no practice today but he wants you to go early tomorrow" Burt said. And Kurt stopped cold.

"w-why?" Kurt asked hoping the look of fear wasn't to noticeable.

He shrugged, "whatever you guys do in there" he chuckled. "dancing and stuff.

Kurt bit his lip and tried to settle his churning stomach. "Kurt are you okay honey you look a little pale?" Carole asked. Kurt

held his stomach trying to coax it not to upchuck what little he ate today.

But thinking about being alone with Him. Alone. With no one around. Made his stomach sour...

Kurt groaned and hurried to the trash can. "aw gross" Finn said getting up and walking out.

"Kurt!" Burt said running over and touching his back. "no...no don't touch me" Kurt said heaving again.

When he finished and straightened up weakly. Shaking, he put a hand to his forehead.

"I'm fine...I'm fine" Kurt said walking towards his room.

He softly shut his door and walked to the bathroom. Taking a long, hot shower.

Kurt laid down putting on his iPod and closing his eyes.

Imagine there's no countries

It isn't hard to do

Nothing kill or die for

And no religion to...

Imagine all the people

Living life in peace...

Kurt opened his eyes when his phone vibrated.

Sooo, I hope I don't sound like a major creeper but I'd like to have

coffee soon :)

-Blaine

Kurt smiled weakly. He looked up when his father walked in quietly. "Kurt we need to talk" he said and Kurt quickly tapped Blaine a reply.

Friday around two is fine ;)

He put his phone on the table and looked at his father when he sat on his bed.

"Kurt...you know you're my world right?" asked and Kurt smiled shyly. "yeah".

"then tell me what's going on" he sounded desperate.

Kurt forced a fake smile, "wrong? I'm fine dad nothing is wrong" he lied.

"Kurt, you started crying when I said your scarf didn't match your hat" he said.

"I-I take fashion very seriously father you should know that" Kurt laughed nervously and swallowed. His mouth suddenly dry. "your grades are terrible and you just don't look good" he added and Kurt placed his hand on his fathers shoulder.

"dad I'm fine trust me" saying those words made Kurt die a little bit more.

Please daddy, save me!

Kurt's head was spinning and tears threatened to spill.

"okay..." he didn't sound convinced as he kissed Kurt's forehead and walked out.

Kurt gasped, wore out.

Yet sleep never made it's way to Kurt.

XxXxXx

Kurt shuddered, closing his eyes.

Blocking it out. Wondering why he had to suffer through this hell. He planted kisses on his neck, and shoulder.

Damn you're so much older

He chuckled and dug his nails in Kurt's back and shoved his tongue in Kurt's mouth. He moved his hands down to Kurt's jeans, "I've waited to damn long for this" he said and started pulling at Kurt's clothes.

"No! Don't please" Kurt cried out desperately trying to get away. He couldn't take this away. Couldn't take another 'first time' from him.

the man smacked him across the face, he sat there a moment stunned. He grabbed Kurt by the hair and pulled his head back. "Listen princess you'll give me what I want whether you make it go smoothly or not" he hissed and dropped his hold. Kurt sobbed silently and looked longingly at the door. "Lay down" he said in a fake gentle voice. Kurt shook his head, a sob escaping his throat.

Another hard smack, blood trickled down his chin. "Now" he demanded and Kurt closed his eyes and shook his head again. "Please...please no" he begged trying to catch his breath.

"Damn i liked it better when you listened right" he muttered and stood. "Get up" he said grabbing Kurts arm roughly. Kurts legs felt weak and shaky wanting so bad to give out. The blow came to his stomach and caught him off guard. He fell against the wall behind him gasping for air. He drew his fist back and punched him in the face. Kurt kept his head low, "Now are you gonna listen?" he said in his ear with a smile. Kurt nodded with a small groan.

He held Kurts head up and smirked, "You're even cute when you're covered in blood".

Kurt felt his stomach twist sickly. "please..." he muttered as the man lead him back over to the couch.

Kurt laid down his vision going spotty for a moment, then focusing as the man got on top of him. Pulling his shirt and pants off, he smiled hungrily when he looked at Kurts near naked form.

He grabbed at Kurts groin, making him gasp.

"I'm going to love being you're first princess"

XxXxXx

Blaine was, totally not, okay maybe a little in love with this Kurt kid.

True they'd only hung out five times after the whole hitchhiking thing but there was something so compelling and mysterious about that chocolate haired boy.

"Earth to Blainers" Jeff said poking his cheek. Blaine swatted his finger away, "What did I say about calling me that?" Blaine muttered angrily

"Do i ever listen to your lectures?" Jeff asked and Blaine rolled his eyes. The end of the day bell rang and he checked his phone.

No New Messages.

"Our little Blaine is lonely" Wes said looking over his shoulder. Blaine shut his phone and spun around, "No..." he rubbed the back of his head. "This Kurt kid really has you good doesn't he" David asked as they walked towards the coffee shop.

I want to go sing a romantic song outside his window kind...Blaine thought miserably.

Thats when his phone rang, "Hello" he answered there was a pause as someone breathed into the phone.

"Hello?" he asked again, "Blaine?" Kurts voice sounded unbelievably small and broken. "Kurt is that you? Whats wrong?" he asked avoiding his friends kissy faces.

"I need you" Kurt whimpered into the phone, "A-are you hurt?" Blaine asked getting up and grabbing his keys. His friends stopped and listened seriously now.

"I dont know" he cried and Blaine bit his lip. "Where are you at I'm coming" he said and started towards his car.

"I dont know" Kurt repeated miserably. "O-okay I'll track your phone...hold on I'll be there, okay I'll be there" Blaine said and fumbled to unlock his car, he didnt even notice when his friends slid in his back seats.

"Don't hang up!" Kurt nearly screamed, sobbing into the phone. "I'm not honey, I'm not...just talk to me" Blaine said and watched as Wes climbed in the front seat.

Kurt babbled helplessly about something Blaine couldn't understand so he pulled his phone away from his ear and tapped on the IPhone to find Kurt's location.

His mouth dropped open and he placed his phone back to his ear, "Kurt how in the crap are you 10 miles away from home?" Blaine asked. "I-I dont..." Kurt started but stopped. "Kurt? Kurt answer me" Blaine said near speeding his way to Kurt.

"Blaine I'm gonna go find a shower okay?" Kurt said in his crying hysteria. "NO!" Blaine said and went through a yellow light. "No Kurt stay right there" Blaine continued listening to Kurt cry.

It began to rain and Blaine went faster, finally he saw Kurts small form sitting against a vacant building. He had his arms wrapped around his knees as he shook and and cried. He was soaked his hair dripping and his boxers sticking to his pale body.

It's a good thing no one was around...

Blaine jumped out dropping his phone, he ran to Kurt. "Kurt?" he said leaning down to Kurt's level. "Blaine?" he answered in his small voice. Blaine held his hand out and Kurt stared at it like it would bite him.

dried blood under his nose and near the side of his mouth scared Blaine. But not as much as his eye which was dark and swollen shut.

"C'mon Kurt I'm going to take you home" Blaine said and got up holding his hands out. Kurt, shakily, took it and Blaine pulled the emaciated boy up and helped him step by step to the car.

His shirt was soaked and clung to his body, Blaine couldn't help but wonder why he didnt have pants on...

he shuddered at the thought, Wes got out letting Kurt in the front. Blaine blasted the heat watching Kurt shake violently. Kurt let out a yelp of pain as he sat down. "Dont worry I'll get you home" Blaine said and drove off. "Kurt where do you live?" Blaine asked Kurt didnt respond his gaze set on the dash.

"Um Kurt-" He started but Kurts body seized forward, "Blaine...I'm going to be sick" he groaned and Blaine stopped pulling over, thanking god again he was in the country with no one around. He hurried out and helped Kurt out. Holding his hair out of his face while he puked.

XxXxXx

Half of the people in his room he didnt even know, but he saw his father. "Oh god Kurt!" he said trying to pull him in a hug. "No..." Kurt whispered and walked past him sitting at his vanity.

"Kurt what happened? Blaine here told me what happened" He said and Kurt shrugged. "I'm fine...I fell down" Kurt mumbled his thoughts thick and syrupy.

"Kurt you're not yourself...I'm taking you to the hospital" he said and grabbed his sons shoulder. "Dont touch me" Kurt growled getting up and knocking over his powder which spilled.

"Kurt please let us help you" Blaine moved forward. "I'm fine" Kurt screamed and put his hands to his ears. "I'm fucking fine why dont you just leave me alone?" he yelled crying. They all looked at him shocked.

XxXxXx

Getting Kurt into the car was hard, getting him out was even harder. He screamed and jerked around, Burt and Blaine holding him. "You guys hate me!" he cried as they entered.

The worst part for both of them was when they strapped him down and sedated him.

As they brought him back Burt and Blaine told there story's or well Kurt's.

"Well we'll see what we can do" he said and they waited.

Hours passed before they were called back, when they were the doctor stood somberly.

"Burt..." these people knew him to well...

"Your son is suffering from RTS" he said and Burt shook his head. "Define" he muttered.

"Rape Trauma Syndrome"


So I didn't know that was a real syndrome but it is! There will be more angst packed chapters :) Review

Medical Notes:

Symptoms of RTS are

Diminished alertness. Numbness. Dulled sensory, affective and memory functions. Disorganized thought content. Vomiting. Nausea. Paralyzing anxiety. Pronounced internal tremor. Obsession to wash or clean themselves. Hysteria, confusion and crying. Bewilderment.

I like keeping my stories medically accurate