Ignis's head ached. Despite that, it was not the first thing that Ignis noticed. It was the warm hand against his cheek, tickling at the skin near the crease of his mouth that caught his attention. It was a hand he had woken to against his cheek so many times, so long ago. It was a hand that Ignis had felt again only once before they went toward the outline of Insomnia in the darkness of the World of Ruin.
Just once.
He didn't want to open his eyes to the darkness. This dream, this memory, was beautiful. Noctis on his old bed in the Citadel. Noctis's heart beat against his ear. Noctis's lips against his own. Noctis's hand cradling his cheek.
"Ignis, wake up."
Despite being blind for ten years, it was difficult to keep his eyes closed. It was why he wore the glasses; Ignis knew that his eyes were unsettling. He had heard the brief comments in the days before leaving Altissia. In the direct aftermath of the loss of his eyes, someone had muttered about them. It was in the color, in the milky white clouds. Ignis tried to think of it as the milk stirred into coffee, but all he could imagine was puss and pain. It was all he felt, either way.
He didn't even know who had said it; no doubt they regretted their decision after Gladio threatened to break every bone in his body, but it meant little in form of an apology.
The truth of the matter was that he didn't want Noctis to see them when he woke. He never wanted to hear disgust in Noct's voice. He knew that Noctis loved him, but he also knew that what had happened to his face, the scars that had swallowed his eyes... How could someone love the feeling of it against their mouth when he himself could not bear to touch it? How could they feel pleasure when running their fingers across his raised and ruined flesh?
After Altissia, Noctis barely touched him. The pain was too fresh, the pleasure hard to accept in those moments of frailty. A few times they had given in to each other, the need for human contact driving both of them nearly mad. Yet Ignis had always feared allowing Noctis to make love to him without his glasses.
Only once, just once… In the never-ending night. It was too dark for Noctis to see, and Ignis wanted to pretend that they had simply extinguished the light.
With or without the glasses, Ignis never quite mastered the skill of how to move about his day without letting his eyes snap open to take in the inky blackness. Occasionally there was a murky color in his right eye, more of tease than actual sight, but—
Ignis's eyes opened to the brightness of Noctis's face.
It flooded back like a monsoon, and Ignis reached up to grab Noctis's face and pull him down. Warm, dry lips. Stubble on his cheek. Soft bed sheets under them. Hands through his hair.
A cough erupted from the side next to the bed and Ignis snapped his head away from Noctis to Regis. The king sat on the black leather chair in the corner of the room like it were a throne. The man was regal despite sitting with his cane across his knees and the tremor to his knuckles. Ignis could see the Ring on his finger, the one that Ignis knew caused constant and unending pain. It glimmered red the way Noctis's eyes did when he accepted the strength of the Astrals or pulled the Royal Arms from the Armiger.
Ignis at least had been blessed with never having been forced to see Noctis with the Ring upon his hand. That… that would have been more than Ignis could bear. Just listening to the sounds of pain were terrible in their own right.
"It is good to see that you have returned to us, none the worse for wear."
Following the King's hand, Ignis realized that the faint light from the morning sunrise had crested through the now open curtains. It must have been noon, slowly fading into dusk. Noon… the sun.
Ignis pulled away, though he didn't have the energy to be embarrassed. He didn't even drop his hand away from Noctis's face. "My apologies."
Forcing himself up onto his elbows, Ignis did a quick assessment of the room. Thankfully they had moved him into Noct's chambers instead of dragging him across the Citadel. His old rooms were located in the South Tower, far enough to be cumbersome and close enough for Ignis to make his way through the Citadel at any time he were needed.
Of course, that had been before Noctis had moved out of the Citadel… Now their home was hidden between Noctis's fresh sheets in the penthouse suite.
Regis did not seem to be fazed by their outward affection, though he did allow his peppered eyebrow to quirk up. "No reason to apologize, Ignis. Clarus was correct; after the events that transpired today, no doubt you must have been exhausted. But," the King said as he grabbed hold of the top of his cane, gently resting the tip onto the carpeted floor, "I believe you to have heard something just prior to your loss of consciousness. Yes?"
Ignis looked to Noctis, whose face had gone ashy.
"No. Iggy didn't hear anything. Right?"
When Noctis had been but a little boy, scared of the monster who spoke to him from inside of his closet, it had been Ignis to chase down the imaginary beasts. He would battle them in grand fights, using the small practice knives to slay Noctis's foes— or at least pretend to. It only took time for Ignis to realize that it had never been an imaginary Boogieman inside of his Prince's closet. Not when there was a Crystal willing to speak of the terrors of the eternal night.
It was worse than a Boogieman.
"Noctis," Ignis began, but Noctis shook his head.
"No. You can't hear it. You can't."
Ignis looked back to the King, who looked so much older than he had that morning. Or, rather, the way Ignis had remembered him.
"Noctis... I believe that Ignis was chosen by the Crystal in the Throne Room. You remember what I taught you of the Crystal and its Omens?"
Ignis had known so little about the Crystal, about what it truly was, before Noctis had gone into it. It had taken years of studying, years of pulling apart text after text, decoding and recoding, for Ignis to finally make sense of what the Crystal was. What it was…
Blood magic. Something tied to the Lucis line into their very DNA. The tests to figure out what magic the Oracle line held to combat the Starscourge had been one of the first of many failed tests into the blood. Lunafreya's body had been lost to the sea and her home to the Niflheim army's bombs, so what little was left had been useless. There had been an attempt to use the blood of those who were cured of the Scourge, but their blood was clean…. Nothing out of the ordinary.
Sania thought it could have had something to do with the magic of the Crystal, attempting to use what little DNA could be found of Noctis, even going as far as to use some of Noctis's old hair to extract scientific data. Each time they tried the samples would turn to ash under microscopes…
In all the years of studying, of searching Costlemark and Steyliff and every other tomb, Ignis had only been able to gather the bits and pieces of what the Crystal was assumed to be. Some believed that the Crystal had been a blessing from the Astrals to purge the darkness; it was what was taught to Ignis when he was child studying the mythos of Eos. And certainly there was lore, from paintings to stories, even to dated documents that spoke of the rise of the Caelum family…
Even of Ardyn Lucis Caelum. Not many, scant even a handful that had somehow been saved from the pyres of history, but enough. And each one spoke of the Crystal as a gift, as a promise to protect.
Yet there was something very peculiar about the history of the Crystal, one that had always bothered Ignis. It niggled at the back of his mind, the way a puzzle would that he had spent too much time looking at. The pieces would meld together until he rubbed his eyes and looked away. Yet every time he glanced away the pieces would move and he would be forced to begin from the very beginning.
History stated that the Crystal had been granted during a time of great strife to the Lucis Caelum family, to protect it from those who would use and wield it for power. Yet the books in Costlemark, the ones that were read in a language long dead spoke of a Crystal…
Solheim.
Ignis was shaken from his thought by Noctis, who smacked his hands against the bed.
"But Iggy's been with me for years!" Noctis burst, the springs under him bouncing in response to his violent outburst. "He's lived here since he was a kid. If it wanted him, it would have—it would have done this before! Not now. And he's never been close enough for it to influence him. There's a reason we don't let people near it." The passion in Noct's voice reminded Ignis that this was still his young, vibrant Noctis. Time in the Crystal had yet to steal that from him.
Yet...
Ignis could not remember a time before that moment where he and Noctis had spoken at any length about the Crystal, about its power. Other than the occasional joke or jab, they did not dawdle on the Crystal. Of course they had spoken of the Ring, of responsibilities and duties, about the magic the Crystal had given his line. Ignis had been by his side when he first pulled his ancestor's Royal Arms from the ether and as he drew out energy from the ground itself to use to craft spells. He knew that Noctis had the innate ability to call upon the magic as his father did, but he had never chosen to do so.
Yet, the Crystal itself?
Ignis could vaguely remember a day when he was young, too young to know better or to understand. Noctis was always such a rowdy and rambunctious little thing, always wanting to sneak through the Citadel. Ignis followed without question, following Noctis's chubby legs as they carried him long past his quarters, down the winding gold and onyx steps toward something Ignis had known even as a small child was something he did not want to see. Noctis had been fascinated, had even said that it had called to him. Ignis was old enough at the time to understand that the connection between the King and the Crystal was different than a mere mortal. He could never have such a connection to the Crystal, nor did he want it.
But the little boy had laughed when Ignis told him of his feelings, saying over and over that the Crystal called to him. Didn't Ignis want to hear it?
Called to him…
It was not the first time the Crystal would sing to Noctis and Noctis would answer… It took time for the terror to build up within Noctis. By the time he was attacked by the Marilith the desire to be close with the Crystal was long gone. In its place was the sheer horror that Ignis could understand and now, having lived through an Omen, empathized all too well.
There had always been a question Ignis couldn't answer, and in the scant amount of time between Noct's return and Insomnia he hadn't asked. Why hadn't he asked? Lack of time. Lack of willingness to accept the meaning behind a final question. Mostly, he was sure, was fear and anger and all-consuming guilt.
In Gralea, why had Noctis touched the Crystal? Had it been to save their lives?
"Noctis, please. I worry that this may have been caused by my request this morning. The Crystal has been known to make choices on its own to do what it thinks is best for our line."
Ignis did not want Noctis to find out about the wedding, Niflheim, the World of Ruin, his own father's knowledge about Noctis's Ascension... Not in this way.
But how was Ignis supposed to prevent the future from taking place if he said nothing?
"If I may?" Ignis asked as he adjusted himself to sit against the headboard. He let go of Noctis's face and hair, despite his own desperation wishing to cling like a child and never let go.
"Iggy, the Crystal didn't do anything to you," Noctis replied sharply, the burn of his cheeks reminding Ignis of all the anger and fury his King could keep under the surface.
"On the contrary," Ignis replied, allowing his tone to belie the honesty and terror he knew he could not fight or hide. "The Crystal gave me an… I believe it was an Omen." He did not mention to Noctis then what it felt like to have his skin burn off or the coldness of Noctis's own lips. Would Noctis believe him? Would Noctis want to believe him?
"But Omens don't happen, not anymore." He turned to his father. "Right? You always told me they didn't really happen anymore."
Ignis looked to the King, whose face lost some of its color. "I had one when you were four. If it was anything like the Omen young Ignis experienced… it is a small wonder that he was able to wake before the month was out."
"I… I don't get it. It's not possible."
Ignis had been taught when he was a little boy to avoid the Crystal's chamber. It was housed just above the Throne Room, and the smell of death seemed to hemorrhage through the stone. Yet other than when he had followed after Noctis, he had never gotten close…
No closer than the Throne Room.
"Noctis, an Omen is not something we can control. It comes when it wishes to those it deems worthy."
Worthy. Ignis snorted, making both Noctis and Regis look at him, though one was with cool collect while the other was a burning flame.
"I hardly consider myself worthy," Ignis began, but was quickly silenced by Regis.
"It does not matter whether or not you believed yourself to be worthy; the Crystal chose you to give its gift to."
A summer of passion and fear. Ten years of darkness.
A gift?
"Yes, Ignis. A gift. A terrible, capricious gift. But a gift nonetheless."
Ignis turned his cheek if he had been slapped, closing his eyes tight. Regis did not understand; he would never be able to understand exactly as Ignis felt. Those ten years, the times he had let his hand trace against the Crystal where Noct's hand was encased below. So close and yet Ignis could never touch that skin.
It took a moment for him to turn his face back. Ignis reached up to grab Noctis, pulling their foreheads together. Warm, living skin.
If it meant Noctis would live, Ignis would suffer a thousand years in desolation. He would give anything never to feel the blood squelching in his hands.
"But that doesn't explain how Ignis was chosen. He never went close to that fucking thing."
Ignis wanted to say something about Noct's language, but bit his tongue. It was such a Noctis thing. No decorum, none at all. He had never been expected to retain them in his personal life, and Ignis had never worried. As long as he remembered it for the Galas or the events, the rest of the time he could say as he pleased. Still, this was his King.
"That's not true, Noctis…"
Once; the night when Noctis had dragged him to the Crystal and… that was it… wasn't it?
"Once—when you were a little boy. You wished to show me the Crystal. I remember… I remember your mother."
Noctis swallowed. "My mother?"
Ignis frowned. He did not remember much about Queen Aulea. She had been a beautiful ghost of his memory, ethereal and wondrous. He tried to recall her face, her eyes, her smile and yet it was a blank page. Her pictures were scarce within the Citadel, though there were quite a few adorning the walls throughout Noctis's private rooms. The same blue eyes, the same mouth.
"It is one of the few memories I have of her." Ignis did not mention his last memory of the queen, how death had taken her by the Scourge. Noctis did not remember and Regis did not need to think back to that time. "She found us in the Crystal chamber. You wanted to show me something of great import to you, and I followed you."
If Ignis closed his eyes he could almost remember the voice that Noctis had told him was there but Ignis pretended wasn't. The small whisper in his ear, the one that made Ignis uncomfortable, the one that had always been there and yet to easy to push to the back of his mind. It was barely there. Unimportant.
"There was another."
Ignis looked to Regis quizzically. "No, I assure you, it was only once." After Noctis went into the Crystal, Ignis had clutched the sides of the Crystal and tried over and over to claw his way through. Something tapered off the power… something had drained the Crystal of its Light...
Regis looked away from him, unwilling to meet his eyes. "Aulea… she told me of finding you in the Crystal's chambers. However… there was another time."
"When." Not a question.
A command.
"Aulea and Noctis were upon their deathbeds... I was inconsolable. There are no words of apology that would be enough, Ignis. No one was there to comfort you; I regretted it immediately when they found you in the Chamber. It was too late for Aulea, but the Crystal reached out to Noctis. It told me that he would be the King of Light and I should have known then…"
"Known what?" Ignis could barely keep the quiver from his voice.
"The Crystal chooses those it deems worthy. You were just a boy, barely six, and we did not consider that the Crystal would take you… not then."
"But I wasn't taken then," Ignis responded immediately. "I remember when the Queen died. I remember when Noctis was taken ill. Not well, but I remember it. And more importantly, I was not sent back not the body of a six year old boy."
"It is true, the Crystal did not take you then… but perhaps it bonded with you. Or perhaps it bonded with you when you were even younger. Do you remember the light?"
Ignis nodded his head, looking into Noctis's blue eyes. "Of course I do. It engulfed the entire Citadel. Bright pink and blinding—"
Noctis squeezed his eyes shut. "Fuck, fuck," Noctis murmured, pulling himself away from Ignis. "No, you can't."
"Of course I can, Noctis. It's in the very walls of this Citadel, wrought above our heads. It's in the New Wall; it always has been."
Ignis could have heard a pin drop.
"Ignis, you can see the Wall?"
Noctis scrambled off the bed, flinging out his arms. "No, he damn well can't."
"I don't understand the importance; the wall is visible to all—"
Noctis spun on his heel, jabbing his finger toward Regis. "Only to those with the Crystal's power. You told me that, didn't you?" The hysterical note to Noct's voice only led more credence to Ignis's own confusion.
"When you were sixteen I was linked to your magic. I've been able to draw from the Armiger for years." Yes, he had been able to see the Wall longer than that connection, but…
"Yeah, but you were linked to my magic. But if you can see the Wall, then that means you gave something to the Crystal. You made a deal with it. The Crystal doesn't just give Omens, Iggy. You…" Noctis grabbed his head, screaming out a sound that reminded Ignis of the Daemons in the ruins of Insomnia. "Fuck. What did you trade? What did you do?" Noctis's voice cracked and Ignis tried to climb from the bed, his limbs feeling like lead.
"I gave nothing to it, Noct," Ignis promised, though the words tasted wrong in his mouth.
"If you gave it nothing, then you wouldn't hear it. You wouldn't see it."
"But I've heard it since I was a child—"
"Damn it, Ignis."
Regis finally stood, reaching out to grab Noctis by the shoulder. Ignis saw his walking stick tremble under the pressure. "Son, calm yourself— Ignis did not do any of this on purpose. We do not have any way of telling exactly what is going with the Crystal, what it has planned."
The wild look in Noctis's eyes… It was something Ignis knew well. That was the face Noctis wore when he woke from the night terrors that would grip his lover throughout his childhood and into adulthood. It was the reason Ignis stayed so close for so long, even after he had known that it would be seen as inappropriate if anyone found out. Wide-eyed, unblinking, feverish red to the cheeks and just the hint of something, an unknown color, in Noctis's eyes…
"Noctis. I assure you, if I knew anything more of the Crystal I would have told you. My interactions with it were limited and brief until…"
"Until what, Iggy?"
Was it fair? Was it right to share?
Part of Ignis wanted to hide it from Noctis, to protect him from the pain the Crystal would doubtlessly pour down their spines like frozen water. Yet Ignis could not lie to Noctis. Not about this.
Bracing himself against the backboard, Ignis answered. "Until you were taken into the Crystal."
Noctis pulled his shoulder away from his father's hand. "Wh—what?"
"We were outnumbered, locked inside of Gralea's Zegnautus Keep. The Daemons kept coming in waves… I couldn't fight them, not in my condition. Prompto and Gladio were on their last Elixirs and then…. They went quiet. So very quiet, I could hear them breathing." Ignis shut his eyes, remembering the inhuman sound underneath the roars. Heartbeats. Breath. More than once was the faint echo of a scream, a sob, a broken moan.
"But Daemons don't breathe."
Ignis shook his head. "I assure you, they do. The darkness's blight, the Plague the Wicked hath wrought. They… they were once human."
Both Noctis and Regis responded in kind, but Ignis shook his head and raised his hand. Oh, how much his hand felt like it weighed. "Please, this is difficult enough. Please, allow me to finish. I will answer any of your questions after."
In that moment it was clear that Noctis and Regis were father and son; the turn of their lips, their frowns… how had Noctis looked with his beard? How had Noctis looked when he died? No—Ignis knew better, he could not think of Noctis that way. Not now, when he was so alive in front of him.
"Then I insist that before we continue that we find a scribe to take down your words. We keep record of all Omens—"
"Absolutely not."
"I beg your pardon," Regis began, but Ignis spoke over him.
"My words cannot leave this room. There are scant few whom we can trust. I do not know much, but on our travels after the nights lengthened we met with a band of Glaives who had survived the ordeal. There were… there with men within the Kingsglaive ranks who acted as Niflheim operatives."
That has both come as a devastating blow, and yet…. Not surprising. Not at all. "The forfeit of lands, the deaths of their people… they did not consider you their king. The wounds were fresh and the treaty, while well-intentioned, did nothing to alleviate their concerns.
"There was a man who was once one of your elite. He told us of the uprising, of the trickery, of a plot by those within your closest circle. This man helped to escort Lady Lunafreya out the city, when… when the Wall fell."
Regis slumped back into his chair, dropping his cane. Noctis was barely able to stand, and Ignis wished that he could reach out to slowly guide Noctis down to the bed, to let him rest. They both knew what it meant if the Wall fell. They both knew the precious payment in blood.
"So. It falls."
Ignis nodded. "It does. In a fortnight or so. There wasn't much time between the announcement of the engagement and our departure." Iglis looked to Noctis, happy that it seemed this one point was already known to the other man. Noctis did not look pleased by the announcement, but… there would never be a wedding. After everything they had gone through as young men, after living and loving and dying…
"Ignis, who can we trust?"
Ignis looked to the King, at his parchment-thin skin and his trembling hand. "The Amicitia family and their staff, Jared and his young grandson. Cor Leonis. Monica Elshett. Dustin Ackers." There were not many that Ignis knew for certain were on their side.
"Do you know who was against us?"
"For certain? Drautos."
Ignis could see the pain in Regis's face, in the clench of his jaw, in the vein beating against his throat.
"Are you certain?" The King closed his eyes, and Ignis had to vocalize his reply.
"Undoubtedly. He is General Glauca."
The information of Glauca's true identity had been one of the only reasons why Ignis and Gladio had not murdered the man, Libertus Ostium, where he stood. The man had been a traitor, and yet…. Imparting that knowledge had at least filled in some of the gaps who what had taken place as Insomnia fell. And despite his act of cowardice, he had also protected Lady Lunafreya (no matter how it ended in blood and water and blindness.)
He had also given them a single blade… to be used when they found the other.
The room was silent for a moment before Noctis spoke. His voice somehow was measured, through Ignis could already hear the cracks. "The Glaive are lost causes. We can't trust any of them"
Regis turned his head to Noctis, eyes narrowed. "Not all. Ignis, you said that a man helped Lady Lunafreya. He would be beneficial to us, no doubt."
"I think it would be best to not involve him. While I do think he is a good man, I do not believe he can be trusted at this time. But—" Ignis stopped himself, but the glances from both Noctis and Regis spurned him forward. "There is another man. We never met, for I believe he passed during the battle of Insomnia. I was told that the Ring granted him its power—"
"That's impossible, Iggy," Noctis began, but was silenced by Regis.
"It is quite possible. Rare, incredibly so… I can only think of two recorded events; once by a Shield during the Rouge dynasty and another…" Ignis looked down to the Ring on his finger. He ghosted the tip of his finger across the red stone. "I cannot quite remember whom."
The softness of the King's words, the caress like a lover to his Ring, the Ring that Ignis knew to cause nothing but agony to the wearer…. There was more to it, and Noctis seemed to know so, too. Yet Regis said no more, instead dropping his hands back into his lap. "It is possible, Noctis. Did this man gain the power of the Ring of the Lucii?"
"I was told so. We later found a short letter addressed to Lady Lunafreya in the wreckage of Insomnia, along with a Kukri. It matched the one his friend gave us. The letter… he seemed very fond of her."
Ignis remembered how Prompto explained the paper to him; the shaky handwriting, the long-dried blood spatter, the promise for a better day and for a world with hope. A whisper of some kind of affection, because why would a man spend his last moments writing a letter to someone who would never see it? It was more of a comfort to him than anything else. Ignis could understand that feeling, more than he cared to admit.
"I believe his name was Ulric. Nyx Ulric."
Essh. Sorry for the kind of information dump. I genuinely hate information dumps, but I need these first few chapters to just be airing out old grievances so that we can actually get to plot and fun times. It sucks when you have one character with a bottomless source of information and he's having to try and fill in the holes. No wonder it's easier for characters to just keep in all the information they have.
Yet, for this story... it just wouldn't work. Ignis would never hide the truth from Noctis, and if they are to stop the Omen, they're all going to need as many hands on deck as possible.
If you notice any problems please let me know
Please review!
