Chapter III

And so I come with the next story to be updated! Hopefully the wait was not too rough. And if it was, here is to the chapter making up for it. Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed the previous chapter; at least some of you did it seems. Anyway, not much to ramble about here, so on with the reviewer responses.

Dantrlan: Do you actually have anything to say or are you just farting into the wind? Oh, just blustering? Right, then move along.

Htler28: Most of my stories are a "mess" by someone's standard or another. So if you have suggestions for improvement I'm all ears.

Nihatclodra: DanMachi isn't actually in the story, I'm just using its deities to replace some of the ones from the other stories. The world and non-gods of DM will never appear. So don't get your panties in a wad. Set up things first, then explain them. It's called En Medias Res.

Kayen1024: No, Issei is not in the story.

Oh it's certain to be a thing of beauty.

Orumon: I know, and Shirou will be doing what he can to fix that in her.

Travis Moon: Long review? My dude, I have seen reviews four times that length, so don't fret over it. And I understand. I hate canonical, Fate/Stay Night Shirou as well. Despise the little moron. That's why the Shirou I'm using is a cross between the two from Fate/Kaleid.

piddle: Was it really that subtle?

dragonfighter11: That's how a lot of my remakes start out. Same set up with things branching out from there.

Guest: Made? He seemed like a massive douche in canon anyway. I don't think I really changed anything.

Guest: You're talking about FSN Shirou.

Guest: Him being alive locks off several girls, among other things. She ruined a lot of things in him.

ulttoanova: I can promise you she will be.

Eher: Glad to hear it.

treyalexander63917: Yes, but it's going to slow down pretty quickly once the two get out of their obsession with Him.

Shashenka: No, I am using only the properties of its alchemy, nothing else.

Not Signed In: That might be a little too often to check, LOL, and I generally try to aim for a semi-original storyline.

Guest Q: Yes. There's nothing else from that series, but yes, he was.

Indeed they are.

Dragonslayer0110: Yes.

A Guest: Nope. Not him.

KRP: I've revealed three, but more are coming.

correnhimself316: Yeah, Eustoma's not the greatest of role models.

DALucifer13: Um... purple?

HungrySnack: There is never a reason not to add DxD.

Dante Fernandez: The character model is Siegfried from Eiyuu Senki.

PanickingNoob94: Maybe, but even if you read the original Campione, this all goes by pretty quickly too. Not an excuse, just saying. As for those two, yeah, they'll butt heads for a while. From what I recall of the LN, yeah, Doni was a major douche. Look up Hephaestus from Is it Wrong to Try to Pick Up Girls in a Dungeon. I'm fairly certain that's a woman.

Reishin Amara: Indeed she will.

Trasgo Madaraz Artifex: I see. Well not everything will be included unaltered.

The Indominator: If you have suggestions, go right ahead.

Bravemaridin: Not a popular opinion, it seems.

ultima-owner: That he does.

Blade1986: A very nice summary. More insanity, that much I can promise.

Servant Ruler: Well at least it keeps you on your toes.

edboy4926: It will take some doing, but they'll get what they deserve.

hnh058513: More than likely.

Neither.

It's certainly possible.

Lord Naruto: I know, but I like using Eustoma more.

Only if you think it exists.

superpierce: I might take a look at it, but I don't read FanFiction much anymore, just write it. And yeah, FSN Shirou was a pain.

Look up Siegfried from Eiyuu Senki.

enigma95: Seems pretty consistent from what I remember. He always seemed like an asshole.

I know.

Templars are a division of the Catholic Church.

Well hopefully you like how it goes from here.

mx2432: I see. Interesting. Never seen it mentioned anywhere in any canon, but I like it, so I used it. Nope.

Umodin: That's how they usually start with my remakes.

Lord Apeiron: Noted. Doesn't seem rushed to me, but I'll see what I can do. Not sure what I can do about "clunky" dialogue, since it seems fine to me.

Archleone: No. If someone pisses Shirou off (And to be clear, that doesn't mean just being rude to him. It'll have to be attacking someone he loves) and he doesn't see a compelling reason to let them escape, they're as good as dead unless he's not strong enough to kill them.

I'd like to think that's the case with him anyway, though some people aren't as keen on that.

As I told someone else, yes, alchemy from FMA. But that is all, no characters, story, items, or events from that series will be featured. Don't worry, there'll be that eventually, I just want to get some things established first.

Actually, I'd argue it is the best analogy in this situation, with the idea you were trying to convey.

And that finishes that! Phew, a big one! On with the show!


Irina noticed his gasp and smiled. "Like it, Shirou?"

"You look beautiful…"

Irina's smiled widened excitedly.

"Why do I have to be part of this?" Xenovia questioned as she stepped out of one of the stalls, now wearing a sleeveless black top, though it was slightly translucent, causing her thin black bra underneath to be easily seen, extremely small jean shorts, which hung so low her panties were slightly visible, and knee-high black boots.

Shirou stiffened as his face turned bright red.

Irina, seemingly unfazed, answered, "Don't you want to look good too?"

Xenovia huffed as she folded her arms under her bosom.

Shirou winced and turned his head away with a hand over his nose.

Pointing to him, Xenovia noted, "See? He's disgusted by this outfit."

Lucretia snickered in amusement. "Oh I assure you that's not the case. He's more than likely thinking how quickly he can get you alone with him now."

"I – I am not!" Shirou exclaimed, Xenovia staring incredulously.

'Yes, you are,' Sieg and Brunhilde commented in unison.

'Shut it!'

Kuroka, sitting on Lucretia's shoulders, back in her feline form, remarked "Hey, Blue, you should probably know something."

"What?" Xenovia replied.

"Your shirt's see-through."

Xenovia blinked in confusion before looking down at herself. "Is that a problem?"

"Yes!" Shirou shouted.

"Just wanted to make sure you knew. And no, just gets him hard."

"You! Quiet!"

"Why?"

The teen then took notice of Lucretia's extremely form-fitting, bright green dress, held up by a the thinnest of halter straps, just barely hiding her bulging cleavage, causing him to gulp uncomfortably.

"Something wrong?" Lucretia asked with a snicker, noticing his lost expression.

However, his attention was taken away when Hephaestus stepped out of the changing room with Asia, the blonde now wearing a simple white dress with thin shoulder straps, black, thigh-high stockings, and a blue sweater jacket.

Shirou smiled and remarked, "Well you looked adorable, Asia," causing the blonde to blush with embarrassment. "Huh? Hephaestus, aren't you going to get something?"

The redhead merely shrugged. "I can change my clothing at will, plus what I have on is what I like."

"Right, then."

"I – Is it really cute…?" Asia asked timidly.

"Of course it is, it's absolutely adorable," he answered, causing her to smile with elation.

"So what now?" Lucretia suddenly asked.

Shirou turned to her in consternation. "Huh? What do you mean?"

"Well you've defeated Doni and you've proven that you're a Campione to the Elders. What do you want to do now?"

"Well I –"

"Will be returning home," a new, even-toned voice remarked.

Shirou turned in slight terror to see a tall woman with dark, even-cut, chin-length black hair, dark grey eyes, and a moderate bust wearing an all-black suit approaching him. "M – Maiya!?"

Lucretia looked at the woman curiously. "Oh? You know this one?"

"Sh – She used to work for my dad."

"Interesting."

"A – Anyway why a –?"

Maiya interrupted him, "Your mother sent me when she heard a god attacked."

Shirou frowned in mild annoyance. "… Right… anyway, got Illya's gift and Liz's chocolates."

Maiya nodded in approval. "Good. Now let's go, and bring your brood mothers with you."

Xenovia glared as Irina turned bright red, both shouting, "Brood mothers?!"

"Yes," she replied plainly.

Shirou sighed heavily. "… Please ignore her," he groaned, the two just staring at him silently.

Lucretia folded her arms under her voluptuous chest with a smirk. "Oh? Don't want us to produce your heirs?"

Twitching an eyebrow, Shirou retorted, "How the heck am I supposed to respond to that?!"

'Honestly,' Siegfried urged, to which Shirou responded immediately.

'Honesty would not be beneficial right now!'

'Oh? How so?'

"Are you leaving…?" Asia asked with a somber frown as she grabbed his sleeve.

Shirou frowned slightly before turning it into a smile. "Yeah, but –"

Again, Maiya interrupted, "All of you are going as well."

Kuroka, sitting upon Lucretia's shoulder, waved her tail with interest.

"Lady Irisviel was most insistent I bring you and any girls you are with back after all."

Shirou looked at her with a flat expression. "… Why did she just assume there would be any…?"

"Because you are you."

He just stared as Brunhilde commented, 'Sounds about right.'

"And Lady Irisviel wants to meet the bearers of her future grandchildren."

Xenovia's eyebrow twitched furiously as Irina's face turned a fluorescent shade of red. "Grandchildren!?" they both shrieked.

Shirou just groaned heavily, whilst Lucretia noted, "Sounds interesting."


Several hours later, as the group boarded the plane, Shirou sighed heavily. 'And I thought this would just be a simple trip…'

'Your Luck should have told you otherwise,' Brunhilde chided.

'I was hoping…'

'That was a mistake.'

"So… what is Japan like?" Erica asked as they walked, pulling Shirou from his internal dialogue.

"H – Huh?"

As they sat down, she reiterated, "Your country. What's it like?"

Shirou leaned his head back and folded his arms in thought. "I've… never really thought about it, honestly. I wouldn't really know how to describe it to someone who's never been there."

"I could try," Irina chimed in.

"Really?"

"Well it has been some years since I've been there, but I can give it a shot. Hm… I guess, it's really pretty. There are a lot of buildings, and it can get kinda stuffy in the summer, but everything around is so pretty to look at. The food's good too."

"The food?" Erica asked, Shirou immediately noticing her perk up.

"Yep!" Irina chirped with a nod and a smile.

"I see…" Erica responded, seemingly trying, and failing, to hide her excitement.

Xenovia and Shirou both stared in disbelief.

"Preparing to fatten yourselves up to prepare for his children?" Maiya questioned.

The girls just stared at her with varying expressions of discontent.

"What?"

Shirou groaned heavily. "Stop trying to force them…"

"But Iri –"

"Is baby crazy. Nothing more."

"I see." She then held up a leash tied to a very annoyed Hephaestus. "Even the fertile Goddess?"

"WHAT THE HELL!?"

"What?"

"Why do you have her on a leash?!"

"To make sure she doesn't escape."

"She's a goddess, not a damned dog!"

The two just stared at each other frustration as the redhead sighed heavily.


Sometime later, Shirou sighed as he and the others approached his house. "This is going to be an interesting return…"

"Oh?" Erica asked, intrigued.

Turning to the others, Shirou urged, "Maiya and I will go in first and try to explain everything. If all of you enter at once it could cause problems."

Lucretia frowned in disappointment as Irina, pouting, replied, "Right…"

Shirou then walked through the front gate with Maiya before calling out, "Mom I'm home."

Like a bullet, Illya rushed out of the house and leapt at Shirou, tackling him with a heavy hug. "Big Brother!"

Shirou grunted and stumbled back to try and make sure he did not fall.

"You're back, you're back!" she cheered repeatedly.

"H – Hey, get down, you could get hurt if I fall," he retorted. He then saw Liz standing in the doorway nearby. "… Liz, if you help me you'll get your chocolates."

With unprecedented speed, Liz was immediately there and grabbed Illya off of Shirou. "Aw…"

"Thanks," Shirou offered, patting Liz's head.

"But I wanted to hug him so much!"

Shirou was almost disturbed by her level of excitement. Deciding to shift focus, he turned to Liz. "… Where's Mom?"

Liz, almost rudely, answered, "Not sure. Chocolates."

Shirou chuckled lightly and pulled a chocolate from his bag, and noticed Liz's gaze following it. At that moment he got an idea. He pinched the piece of chocolate between two of his fingers and raised his arm.

Liz perked up in response and dropped Illya, focusing on the sweets.

After a lengthy pause, Shirou flicked the piece out, Liz hopping forward to catch it in her mouth, with Shirou immediately flicking another; which Liz swiftly and easily caught as well. He kept flicking more and more to her until she got right next to him, at which point he held a piece in his hand, which Liz, still with her mouth, grabbed swiftly.

Shirou chuckled in amusement and patted her head gently.

Sella, meanwhile, stared in confused disbelief. "It's like taming a dragon…"

Still petting Liz, Shirou turned his attention to Sella. "Can you find Mom? Maiya and I need to explain the situation to her."

Sella frowned uncertainly but nodded. "Sure…"


Shirou brought everyone into the house and explained, mostly, how he met them. Though he kept certain details scant due to Illya's presence.

Iri put a hand on her chin in thought. "Hmm? So these are the girls you picked up from Italy?"

Puffing her cheeks suspiciously, Illya retorted, "I told you Big Brother would."

Siegfried could not hide her laughter at that. 'Ouch, even the kid knows you're a lady killer.'

Shirou, annoyed, rebuffed, 'I don't kill people!'

Siegfried gaped in shock. '… Is he always this dense?'

Brunhilde answered her with a sigh. 'Yes. Yes he is.'

Shirou twitched an eyebrow, before being drawn from his internal dialogue by Iri.

"So? Introduce me."

Nodding, he proceeded. "Right. I am sure you remember Irina."

Iri blinked curiously as Shirou motioned to Irina before her eyes began to sparkle. "Oh? Oh! My, my, you've grown to be so beautiful, Irina! You're a beautiful daughter-in-law!"

Irina began fidgeting in her seat with a bright red face. "D – Daughter-in-law?!"

"Yep!" Iri chirped with a small clap, Irina giggling incoherently as Xenovia sighed in exasperation.

Motioning to the blue-haired woman, Shirou introduced her as well. "Her friend Xenovia."

"Oooh. Blue-haired future grandbabies from this daughter-in-law."

Xenovia frowned slightly, Kuroka's tail swishing about, amused.

Iri then turned and saw Lucretia, a small frown creeping onto her delicate features. "I see you brought Zola with you."

Lucretia just smirked confidently in return. "Oh? Don't want a cougar daughter-in-Law?"

"No, I just remember hearing stories from Kiri about you."

"Oh? I hope they were good."

With as pleasant a smile and voice as usual, Iri responded bluntly, "They weren't."

"Oh?" Lucretia asked with a growing smirk.

Shirou looked between the two in concern. "U – Uh-oh…"

'What Uh-Oh?' Siegfried asked, confused.

'If we don't do something these two might come to blows…'

"So, tell me, what are your intentions with my son?" Iri questioned, continuing the conversation.

With a wide, sly smirk, Lucretia answered, "To train and educate him in the pleasures of a woman and make sure he's drained dry every day."

Iri clapped her hands together with a smile. "I can approve of that."

Shirou was tempted to slam his face into a wall. "Are you kidding me!?"

'They seem to be getting along just fine to me.'

"Is something wrong, Dear?" Erica asked in bewilderment.

"I am not," Iri answered with a sudden sober expression.

Shirou just stared in disbelief before Hephaestus questioned out loud, "So, can I go home yet?"

"No," Maiya answered bluntly, annoying the goddess.

Looking to the redhead, Iri questioned, "So who's the red-haired daughter-in-law?"

"Makunosai," Maiya answered immediately.

Hephaestus twitched an eyebrow irritably, feeling an urge to strangle the black-haired woman.

Iri merely nodded in understanding before turning her attention to the blonde in the group.

Putting a hand on her chest confidently, she introduced herself. "I am Erica. Erica Blandelli."

"And the maid daughter-in-law?"

Bowing formally, Arianna answered, "Arianna Hayama Araldi."

Iri nodded in approval as she looked around the room before smiling with anticipation. "I see. So when can I expect a grandbaby making orgy?"

Shirou slapped a hand over his face in disbelieved annoyance.

"Not sure yet," Lucretia retorted.

"Kill me…" the teen lamented.

Xenovia rebuffed, "We couldn't even if we wanted to."

Shirou just stared quietly. "… I don't know how I feel about that."

Iri, smirking in amusement, added, "Quite an addition to the harem."

Shirou groaned before beginning to argue, only to decide it was not worth the effort. "There is no – oh forget it… I'm going to bed…"

Illya looked at him in shock. "H – Huh?! But you just got home!"

"Jet lag," he retorted bluntly.

"Okay…" Illya pouted as he left.

"Goodnight."


In his room, Shirou flopped onto his bed heavily. "God I'm tired… and can sleep like a log…"


The following morning, Shirou awoke with a groan, feeling a large amount of heat around him and a rather light amount of weight atop him. 'Can't… move…' Opening his eyes weakly, he saw Liz on his left, hugging his arm tightly between her mounds, Irina wrapped around his right arm in the same way, and Illya sleeping peacefully on top of him. '… Craaap!' Hearing an all-too familiar snapping sound, he slowly looked up in horror and saw Iri holding a camera with a smirk. '… Oh no…'

Snickering to herself as she approached, Iri noted, "I'll pick up Illya so you can start making babies."

Shirou paled in further worry. '… Brunhilde, do something!'

His only answer was Brunhilde moaning sleepily. 'S – Sieg stop!'

'… Shit! Can this get any worse?!'

His question was answered by a loud knock at the house's front door. "Senpai?! Are you home?" a demure voice called out.

Shirou's face went completely pale. 'FUCK YOU E-RANK LUCK!'

"Senpai…?" she called out again, this time with worry.

'… Why…? Why is Sakura here!?'


He eventually managed to wriggle himself out of the girls' embrace and to the door, Sakura, an attractive young woman with elbow-length violet hair with one bang hanging down longer than the rest on the right side, stopping just above her slightly above average bust-line, a red ribbon tied in the left side of her hair, fair skin, and pupil-less, violet eyes, wearing a white, black, and red school uniform with a shawl and thigh-high stockings, came in, rather abruptly, and swiftly saw the rather large gathering of people in his house. Her face flushed red, she began to stutter and stammer in bewilderment.

"C – Calm down Sakura," Shirou eased, trying to stop her from having a heart attack.

"Th – There's so many girls… where'd they all come from… why are they at your house…?! Are you stashing chicks!?"

"Where the hell'd that come from?!" Shaking his head of the weird verbiage, he answered heavily, "Italy was a lot crazier than expected…"

"I – I see…" she answered slowly before sitting down.

Iri, smiling as pleasantly as ever, added, "They are all his future wives, like you."

"R – Really?" she asked, seemingly unfazed by the remark.

Turning to Sakura in concern, Shirou argued, "Don't listen to her rambling nonsense!" seemingly unaware of her disappointment.

Iri argued once more, But it's not. All you girls are my daughters-in-law. And Sakura, if you want first babies, take him now."

Sakura immediately began to turn an even brighter shade of pink at that comment.

"Please stop…" Shirou begged, the embarrassment threatening to eat him alive.

Lucretia looked Sakura up and down in thought before turning to Shirou. "Hmm… Your first?"

Shirou's face turned an even brighter red. "Wh – What?! No!"

Lucretia's curiosity turned to concern. "I see…"

Sakura's face also contorted in worry.

Shirou stood up with a hurried, uncomfortable laugh. "Right! I need to go to school! Let's go Sakura!"

Sakura just nodded in confusion as he hurried her to the door.

Iri suddenly perked up in realization. "Oh! That reminds me. Someone came to see you the other day." With a sly smirk, she added, "A girl, too."

Shirou turned to her slowly, concerned but listening. "… Oh…?"

Nodding, Iri continued. "She said she was the student council president."

Blinking curiously, Shirou raised an eyebrow. "President Shitori?"

"Ah, yes. Her."

"She say why?"

Iri shook her head in denial. "No. She just asked if you were here and left." Iri's sly smirk then turned completely lewd. "Moving up in the world quite swiftly."

Shirou just hung his head in shame. "… Please stop trying to hook me up with every girl you see…"

"But I must!" Iri answered proudly with a determined fist.

Shirou just groaned as he hurried out the door with Sakura.


Eventually, they arrived at school, going their separate ways before the gate.

With a concerned sigh, Shirou ran through his mind. 'I wonder what Shitori wants… Best go see.'

"Emiya," an even-toned voice called out.

Turning in surprise, Shirou saw a young, curvy woman with long black hair down to her waist, with two long bangs hanging over her generous bust, a violet left eye and light brown right eye behind half-frame, square glasses, wearing the same uniform as Sakura, though without the shawl. "Huh?" 'That's Tsubaki Shinra, the Student Council Vice-President, right?'

Brunhilde answered in affirmation. 'Yes it is.'

"Vice-President Shinra?"

'She's also a devil.'

'You mentioned that once.'

"Sona would like to meet with you," Tsubaki explained firmly.

Shirou nodded in understanding. "That's what my mom said, and I was already on my way there to meet said devil."

Tsubaki narrowed her eyes suspiciously but motioned to the main school building. "This way."


Shirou followed her through the long hallways, up all the way to the fifth and top floor, where, in the middle of the hallway against the front of the building, stood the Student Council Room.

Waiting inside was Sona, a young woman around Shirou's age with short black hair in a bob cut, violet eyes, a slim figure, and wearing the female Kuoh uniform, a black mantle with white trim added on top, along with rounded, violet-colored spectacles. "I want you to join the Student Council."

Shirou narrowed his eyes in thought. "Oh? Why?" 'I highly doubt she has any interest in me personally. Just my power.'

"I want you for your mind."

That answer caught him a little off guard. "… Eh?"

"You heard me."

"Right…"

Adjusting her glasses, Sona continued. "Yes. You have amazing insight on people, and an intuitive mind that would be an invaluable asset to the Student Council."

"A – Ah. Thanks. I think. Though if I join I won't become part of your Peerage, President Shitori."

Sona frowned in slight frustration before fixing her expression. "I see. Disappointing."

Shirou just shrugged with a smile. "Sorry to disappoint you."

A more playful glint filling her eyes, Sona changed the topic. "Though I have heard an interesting rumor I'd like you to verify."

Shirou's expression soured with suspicion. "Oh…? Does it have to deal with my trip to Italy?"

Sona merely nodded. "That it does. So, is it true? Are you now a Demon King?"

Deciding deception was inadvisable, Shirou merely shrugged and told the truth. "Yes. It is. I killed Verethragna and have his Authorities. I also killed a Campione that attacked me for no reason except for 'fun' and gained two of his while releasing the rest."

Sona's smirk widened. "My, my, very intriguing."

Shirou huffed derisively. "I guess. I just blame my E-Rank Luck."

That remark got Sona's confidence switched to surprise. "E-Rank is hardly what I'd call that."

Shrugging, he added, "That's the lowest scoring though."

With an amused chuckle, she retorted, "I guess we have different perspectives then."

"Guess so."

With a hefty sigh, Sona returned the subject to its original place. "That said, adding you to my Peerage, even if I were to try and force you, is now impossible. So, I instead propose a different arrangement."

"Oh?"

"A mutually beneficial partnership. You give me something I want, and in return I provide you with something you want."

"And what can you provide me?" Shirou rebuffed as he folded his arms.

"Let me tell you my end of the bargain, and then we can go from there."

"Sounds fair."

"I'll skip the pleasantries and come out with it. I have goals to change the political system of the Underworld, and having a Demon King at my back would make my goals far easier to achieve."

"And those are?"

"Currently, in the Underworld, there are only two ways to become a High-Class Devil, the effective ruling class of our society. And that is to be born into an existing High-Class family or to be a member of a High-Class Devil's Peerage and prove yourself worthy of becoming a High-Class Devil yourself. As I'm sure you can see, this leaves very little room for social mobility."

Shirou nodded in comprehension. "And you wish to use my influence to help setup a system to increase the rate of social mobility."

"Yes. My biggest problem is education. Only pure-blood High-Class devils receive a proper education. So I plan to establish a school for all devils to attend. The first step to social mobility is education."

"True," he answered with a nod.

With a small sigh, Sona returned, "So, what do you consider appropriate for your end?"

Shirou put a hand on his chin in thought. "Hm… an alliance with your family."

She raised an intrigued eyebrow. "How so?"

"Allies in combat and you helping me gain influence in Devil Politics."

She nodded with a curt smile. "I can agree to that. And frankly, I'd wager I'm one of the best for that kind of deal, not to brag."

"Oh?"

"My… eccentric, elder sister is one of the four rulers of the Underworld. She herself is completely useless but it gives our family friends in high places."

"Serafall?"

Sona nodded, rather surprised. "Yes, her."

"Ah. Heard about her from Mom."

"Your mother?"

"Irisviel von Einzbern Emiya."

Sona's eyes widened subtly in surprise, though she quickly contained her reaction. "My, quite the parentage you have."

He just shrugged in response. "We're not blood related, so I didn't inherit anything like that from her. Merely adopted for as long as I remember."

"Interesting."

"Maybe."

"That said…" Sona then reached a hand out to him.

"Huh?" he muttered.

"To seal the contract."

"Right…" he answered apprehensively before grabbing her hand, shaking the girl's soft hand.

Sona nodded with a small smile. "There, that seals the contract. I look forward to working with you, Shirou Emiya."

Shirou returned with a nod. "Same to you. Sona Shitori."

Blinking in thought, Sona spoke up once more. "About that. My name is actually Sona Sitri."

"Noted," he replied with a nod. "But I'll call you Shitori still to keep it a secret. Wouldn't want anyone unlearned to learn your Devil name."

Sona just smirked as he turned and left.

"So goodbye for now," he added as he left.


Shirou sighed as he walked towards his classroom before hearing a voice call out to him. Turning, he saw a teenage girl with wavy brown hair that extended just past her shoulders, medium-length bangs hanging down over her forehead, just above her amethyst eyes, clad in the female uniform, and round, frameless glasses, running up to them, her large bosom bouncing enticingly. He paled in worry. "Mina! Don't run!"

She hummed in thought before she was caught by one of her own feet, causing her to trip.

"Crap!" he cursed before running up to her, catching her as she fell. "You okay, Mina?"

The girl just laughed weakly. "Y – Yeah. Sorry, Shirou."

"Flirting in the halls already?" a new voice teased, a girl with elbow-length brown hair that hung down over her face in a multitude of bangs, multiple strands of hair poking out behind her head, and some of it braided in two ponytails that hung on the front of her body, amber eyes, and wearing the female Kuoh uniform with the vest covering her moderate bust, and large, pink-rimmed glasses.

Shirou just looked at her confused. "Oh, it's just you Aika."

She pointed down.

Shirou looked and realized his left hand was firmly sunk into Mina's voluptuous chest. He turned bright red and stepped away from her.

'Pity…' Siegfried pouted.

After chuckling, Aika then stepped up to Shirou and grabbed his cheek, hard. "Now, what did you mean by it's 'just' me?"

"E – Eh? Ow, ow! Please let go!"

Aika pouted and released his face with a rather loud snap. "So, you get me anything in Italy?"

Rubbing his sore face, Shirou shook his head. "No. Because you didn't ask me to get you a gift."

Aika twitched an eyebrow and grabbed both of his cheeks. "A girl shouldn't have to ask!"

Mina laughed weakly and tried to get Aika off him. "H – Hey be nice Aika…"

Aika frowned and released the red-haired teen with a sigh. "Geez… you're too soft on him, Mina."

'She's soft alright,' Siegfried sniggered.

Shirou huffed at the girl. "I prefer her softness over your pinching Aika."

Aika snickered victoriously. "Oh-hoh? Admitting you like her boobs, huh?"

Shirou winced as his face turned red.

Siegfried could not, or did not try to, contain her laughter. 'You walked into that one. So go walk right into them.'

'Shut up. Brunhilde, why did you let this pervert in my head?'

Siegfried answered bluntly. 'I'm good with my hands.'

Shirou twitched an eyebrow, hoping to hear a retort from Brunhilde.

'Sh – She is…' she answered with a shy tremor.

Shirou just groaned in exasperation. "Let's just get to class…"

"Yeah…" Mina agreed as the three headed in.


Shirou stretched his shoulder uncomfortably as he sat down. 'Those three really made me stiff this morning…'

'Oh something was definitely stiff,' Siegfried commented.

'Shut up please…'

'Why should I?'

Interrupting his internal dialogue, a doddery old man with a balding head of hair walked into the classroom. "Sit down everyone, I have an announcement to make…" the old man stated slowly.

Shirou twitched an eyebrow furiously. '… This has to deal with the girls. I just know it.'

"We've got two new teachers joining us today, and a couple new students. Oh, and Mr. Kusanagi has resigned as your homeroom teacher…"

'Two teachers?'

"Come in…" the old man urged as the door open and two people entered the room.

'Knew it…' Shirou grumbled in his mind as Lucretia walked in with Hephaestus.

Lucretia bowed gracefully. "Lucretia Zola. I'll be your new homeroom teacher."

Hephaestus waved lazily. "Makunosai, your home ec teacher."

Shirou sighed in small relief as the boys in the class went wild for the two beauties. 'Good. Seems they aren't going to do anything that will cause me problems.'

Lucretia chuckled at the rowdy class. "Now, now, boys, calm down. I'm already taken."

Shirou paled before sending a glare at her. 'Don't. You. Dare…'

"Now let's see… Ah! There you are, Shirou!"

Shirou frowned, ignoring the other guys in the room who stared death at him.

Lucretia looked at her fellow redhead with a smirk. "Well?"

Hephaestus folded her arms with a huff. "No. I'm not going to play into your prank."

Lucretia pouted, though still smirking. "Aw, you're no fun."

"I am when I want to be."

Shrugging, Lucretia redirected the conversation. "At any rate, we have a few new students as well. Come introduce yourself, girls."

The entire class gasped in awe as Xenovia, Irina, and Erica walked into the room.

Shirou twitched an eyebrow furiously. '… None of them better…'

"I'm Irina Shidou!" the chestnut-haired beauty introduced with a bright smile.

"Xenovia Quarta," added the short-haired girl plainly.

"Erica Blandelli," finally the blonde added with a formal smile.

Mina stood from her chair with surprise. "Irina…?"

Irina looked at the brunette with surprise before a wide smile formed. "Mina!?" she exclaimed before diving at the girl with a hug. "It's been so long, Mina!" The two laughed before Irina noticed the guys in the room staring at the sight and drooling. She stood up with a frown in return.

Shirou groaned, knowing what was coming.

Pointing at the staring onlookers, Irina chided, "Eyes off! This is only for Shirou! We've already pledged our lives to Shirou Emiya!"

Mina looked to the side, blushing, but said nothing.

Shirou just sighed as the class scowled at him before grumbling, "And don't glare. I have no control over my childhood friends."

After the class calmed and everyone moved to their seats, Shirou twitched an eyebrow at the seating arrangement. Mina sat to the right of his desk as usual, Irina to his left in a previously empty desk, Erica behind him, Xenovia in front of him, and Aika to the left of Xenovia.

Hephaestus, giving a simple lecture, smiled in slight amusement as she watched.

Shirou sighed heavily. 'This school year just got much more annoying…'

'Because your harem is here?' Siegfried questioned.

'Shut up.'

'Nope.'

Brunhilde sighed in defeat as Shirou pinched the bridge of his nose.


"What is with you?!" Shirou bellowed as he spoke privately with Irina and the other new attendees.

"H – Huh?" Irina stammered as she stumbled back in shock.

"What do you mean, my husband?" Lucretia questioned.

"That! You being at my school is one thing! I can get used to it but what's with that 'pledge your lives to me' bullshit!?"

Xenovia folded her arms with frustration. "I had to take that pledge when we were assigned to serve…" Glancing at Irina, she added, "Some took to it more gleefully than others."

Shirou's jaw almost hit the floor. "… Heh?"

Lucretia, who was still smirking with amusement, who added, "The Mage's Association is subservient to the Campiones, so any mages living within a region are automatically pledged to that King. And since I was there when you became a King I was to be your mage bride."

"Right… So why did you and Hephaestus do that crap then…?"

"Iri didn't want me and the vacationing goddess freeloading."

"Yeah, I get that. But you didn't have to barge in with all that stuff about me!"

Lucretia pretended to pout. "Aww… You didn't like it?"

"Whether I liked it or not isn't the point. The point is that I've now got a target on my back from just about every guy in school! And even some of the girls!"

"You're not scared, are you?"

Shirou sighed as he folded his arms. "Of course not. Even before transforming I could've handled them easily. But that's the problem, they're all essentially normal humans, they don't know anything about the magical world, plus I can't just go around killing people. Meaning having them trying to shank me is going to be a real pain on the ass!"

"Then we'll deal with them," Erica remarked firmly.

"No! You can't just go around using magic on people or fighting them. But now, I'm going to have all kinds of people at my throat and I'll need to fight back without using any magic or alchemy and making sure I don't kill them! It's going to make studying extremely difficult! GRAH! FUCK YOU E-RANK LUCK!"

"What are you shouting about so early in the day?" an annoyed voice asked.

Shirou turned in surprise and saw a tall, buxom woman with long, wavy purple hair tied in a folded ponytail at the back with two long locks hanging down, framing her face, accentuating her dark red eyes, wearing a white, frilly blouse with long sleeves and a wide neck that revealed a large portion of her voluptuous bust, including the mole on her right breast, along with a small portion of her black, lacy bra underneath, a short, form-hugging black skirt with a small slit up the right side, black high-heeled shoes, and long, thigh-high stockings with lacy black garters visible at the edges of the skirt, along with frameless, squared glasses. "O – Oh. Ms. Suzune…"

'Great stonking tits!' Siegfried howled. 'They're almost as big as Lucoa's!'

Shirou winced at the voice howling in his mind.

Suzune turned to Hephaestus and Lucretia. "So you're the two new teachers?"

"That we are," Lucretia answered.

The purple-haired beauty then turned her attention to Shirou. "I suggest you return to class, it is not yet break time."

"I was already on my way there."

"Good."


Later in the day, Shirou sighed as he sat on the school's roof eating his lunch alone. "Nice and peaceful…" As if to make a fool of him, the door to the roof opened.

"Shirou Emiya?" a voice asked.

Shirou turned and saw a girl with fair skin, bright blue eyes, and long, waist-length, blonde hair and an impressive bust wearing the female Kuoh uniform. "Whoa… Y – Yes."

"My name is Yuumi Kiba," she introduced with a bow.

"Right."

'Devil,' Siegfried stated plainly.

'I know,' he grumbled in his mind.

"Are you busy?" she asked.

"No…"

"Then will you come with me?"

"Sure…" he answered apprehensively. "Lead the way to wherever we're going."

Yuumi nodded with a pleasant smile.


He swiftly regretted his decision as she brought him to the unoccupied, old school building off from the main academy grounds. '… Creepy building.' "Do you devils always love stereotyping?"

Yuumi flinched slightly, but her expression remained unchanged.

"I mean, creepy old building? Definitely a stereotype."

"L – Let's just head inside."

"Sure. Not like this is a trap or anything. Would be stupid if it was."

"I – Indeed…" she muttered uncomfortably.

"There's no need to be nervous."

"R – Right."

He then followed Yuumi into the building until they reached a large set of double doors.

"Here it is."

"What's… it?"

"The Occult Research Club." Pushing the doors open, she ushered Issei into the room.

It was a large room with few decorations on the back wall where the doors sat, a small number of windows on the left wall with the curtains drawn, several simple paintings on the far wall, and multiple more paintings on the right wall with a door in the far corner on the right-side wall, along with a large, red rug on which a wide table and large chair at the back wall of the room and an elliptical red table with two couches on either side of it sat.

"You could have chosen better to remain anonymous."

"It wasn't my choice…" she lamented.

"I figured. You seem smart enough not to follow stereotypes." He gaped as he saw three people inside.

The first was a young woman in her late teens with a buxom figure, light skin, long, crimson-red, waist-length hair with a single strand sticking up off her head, loose bangs covering her forehead and framing her face, blue-green eyes and wearing the female Kuoh uniform with a small cape added on that fastened in the front just above her ample bosom.

The second was a young woman the same age as Rias with long black hair tied in a ponytail that still managed to reach her ankles that had two long antennae sticking out and sloping backwards along with violet eyes and a bust even larger than Rias' own, larger than even Lucretia's.

The third and final was a petite girl who appeared to be around fifteen, with short white hair with two slightly longer bangs going past her shoulders and several loose bangs around her forehead, while the back was in a short bob cut, along with hazel eyes, a black, cat-shaped clip on both sides of her hair, as well as the Kuoh Academy uniform, the variant without the mantle.

Shirou gave a small sniff as he stood.

'Orgy!' Siegfried exclaimed with excitement.

Motioning to the group, Yuumi introduced them. "This is our club president, Rias Gremory, the vice president Akeno Himejima, and one of the other members, Koneko Tojou."

Shirou looked over the three in thought. "Full-blooded, part angel, and part kitten."

Koneko stared at him silently, though Rias smirked with intrigue. "You're a perceptive one indeed."

"I just have a nose for these things."

"Dog," Koneko bit quietly.

"No."

"Now, now," Rias remarked with mild amusement. "No need to be rude."

Koneko frowned silently.

"So, with your apparent knowledge of the supernatural, that means I can get to the point."

Shirou furrowed his brow in thought. "… You… don't know my family very well if you assumed that I'd lack knowledge of the Moonlit World.'

"Well sometimes families of humans would rather keep their children ignorant of such things."

"Even Magus?"

"There are even cases of that. But that's not important now."

"I want to make one thing clear before we go any further."

"Oh?"

"I won't join your Peerage. After all, a Campione is too powerful for a devil to even try to reincarnate."

Rias' eyes went wide with surprise at the statement. "This is certainly a most interesting turn of events."

"So Sona didn't inform you?"

"Sona knows about you as well?"

"That's a no. And yes, we have an agreement already set in place."

Rias pouted in frustration. "Well that complicates things."

"Not necessarily. I'm still willing to form an agreement with you, you just need to give me something Sona isn't already, and that doesn't go against the agreement I have with her."

"I see…"

"So tell me what you want."

The room quickly went silent, with the only sound being Koneko munching on biscuits.

Shirou raised an eyebrow at the silence.

Suddenly, Akeno began to speak. "There is somethi –"

"Akeno," Rias interrupted sharply.

Shirou frowned suspiciously. "Let her speak."

"It's nothing relevant to our discussion." Under her breath she remarked, "There's nothing you can do anyway."

Akeno blinked in thought before a small smirk formed on her lips. "It's alright if you push him away, Rias. You'll just have to suffer for the rest of your life."

Shirou frowned deeply. "… And why is that…?"

Rias turned to the raven-haired beauty with annoyance, Akeno continuing. "She's been forced into a political marriage with a man who is wholly despicable."

The red-haired teen narrowed his eyes angrily. "… How do you want it dissolved?"

Akeno's smirk widened. "Well, if it's a direct order from a King, the majority of the Underworld is likely to comply. Of course, the man himself is likely to resist."

"Too bad for him then. So what do I have to do to cancel his marriage? Just cancel it?"

Akeno shrugged slightly in response. "You could do that. But it's more likely to be accepted if you offer a better deal."

"Okay…? Like what? A weapon of some kind? Territory?"

Rias began, "I would say –"

"Her marrying you," Akeno suggested, interrupting Rias.

"A – Akeno!" Rias stammered in embarrassment.

Siegfried snickered in amusement. 'Called it.'

Shirou just shrugged in response. "If that's what she wants. We could always break it off later."

Rias looked at him in shock.

"What? If it helps, I'll give it a shot."

"Right…"

Akeno nodded appreciatively before smiling slyly. "You're certainly willing to help someone you just met."

"I can tell you're not lying Sadist Queen."

Akeno's eyes widened subtly as she stiffened.

He then looked at Rias. "It's not just that. I can't stand by and do nothing when I have the power to help."

Akeno returned a small smile of appreciation.

Shirou then changed the subject slightly. "Anyway… shall we formalize it?"

"Yes," Rias answered with a nod before reaching a hand out to him.


"What a day…" Shirou groaned as he left the school. 'I know I'm tempting fate here, but please no more crazy…'

'Never tempt fate,' Siegfried warned.

Shirou stood still and looked around suspiciously. "… Am I safe? Maybe I am…" Sighing in relief, he rounded a corner and bumped into someone, feeling his head wrapped in softness. 'Shit…' Pulling back, he saw a mature woman with long, hip-length, dark brown hair that had two strands sticking up from the top of her head, bangs hanging down over her forehead, parted in the center with a single lock hanging down between them, falling between her bright, emerald eyes, wearing red, half-frame glasses, an ankle-length, white lab coat, a sleeveless, turtleneck, green sweater with vertical stripes that greatly accentuated her wide bosom, a dark grey miniskirt with a slit up one side, nearly to her waist, thigh-high, dark brown stockings with black garters that disappeared under her skirt, and navy blue high-heeled shoes.

He stepped back and bowed. "Oh. Sorry about that…"

'… Whoa… who's this babe?' Siegfried asked in awe.

'Chisato Hasegawa, the school's nurse.'

Chisato just shook her head in response to him.

"Anyway… Something wrong?"

"No," she answered bluntly.

Shirou sighed in relief. "Ah. Good to hear, for a second there I thought something bad came up."

"I see," she replied before walking away.

After a moment's pause, Siegfried noted, 'By the by, she's an angel.'

'We know,' both Shirou and Brunhilde answered.

Siegfried was silent in shock for a moment. '… Seriously? How?'

'My nose knows these things,' he answered cryptically.

Siegfried pouted in frustration. 'Right…'

'Anything else before we head home?' Brunhilde asked, redirecting the conversation.

Shirou put a hand on his chin in consideration. 'Not that I can think of.'


Shirou sighed in relief as he walked through the front door. "Good to be home…" he sighed only to be tackled in a firm hug.

"Big Brother!" Illya cheered as she hung from his waist.

"H – Huh?!" he stammered in surprise, ready to react, only to realize it was her. "Oh. Hey Illya."

Illya just giggled happily, only for Sella to grab her by the collar and pull her away.

"You need to do your homework, young lady," the maid chided.

Illya pouted defensively. "Aww…"

"That won't work on me."

Illya huffed in defiance.

Shirou chuckled and patted her head gently. "It's okay, Illya, we can play later."

"Okay…" she responded as he headed for his room.


Shortly later, as he worked, he heard a knock on his door. "It's open."

In walked a curious Iri. "Do you have a moment?"

"Of course," he answered with a smile.

"So, how did your first day back go?"

Shirou slumped in his chair with a heavy sigh. "Crazy. And made deals with two devils."

Iri put her hands on her cheeks with excitement. "Wow! Two more girls already!"

The boy just stared up at her, annoyed. "… You don't know that they're –"

She bluntly interrupted, "The only two important devils you could meet are Sona and Rias."

He twitched an eyebrow at her block. "… They aren't in my harem."

She cooed in further excitement. "So you finally admit you have one!"

Shirou slammed his hand on the desk. "A threesome is not a harem!" he argued before wincing as he realized what he had just said. "U – Uh, that… I…"

Iri's eyes widened in disbelief.

Shirou began to sweat in fear. "W – Wait, I can explai –"

"You've had a threesome already!?" she asked with starry-eyed glee. "With who?! When?! How was it!? Can I meet them!? When are they due!?"

Shirou sighed heavily and decided to just answer her questions. "Yes. Sakura and Chisato. Three months ago. Great. No clue. And what?"

Iri, now leaning in overly close to Shirou's face, demanded, "When will I get grandbabies!?"

"How should I know!?" he blurted out.

Siegfried laughed proudly. "I underestimated you, kiddo!"

'Please shut up…'

Iri pouted in disappointment. "Well if you've already done it once, do it again until I have grandbabies!"

"Do you even realize that you're basically whoring out your own son!?"

"Adoptive," she corrected with a playful smile.

Shirou just twitched both eyebrows as he looked at her in disbelief. "… Still! It's not right!"

Wagging a finger angrily, she accented, "Grand. Babies. Need. Them."

Shirou just continued to stare in annoyed disbelief.

With a sigh, Iri added, "If not you, then Illya."

That immediately got him to wince before he stood up and closed the door. "… Why…? Why is my mother so insane!?"

'She is grandbaby crazy,' Brunhilde noted.

Siegfried, who had been laughing madly throughout all of this, added, 'I've seen women be baby crazy before, but this is something else!'

'… I'm beginning to regret you keeping Siegfried here, Benny…'

'Benny? BENNY!? He calls you Benny?!'

The two went silent at her. '… Shut. Up.'

'No!'

Shirou just groaned heavily as he slumped onto his bed.


Later that night, Shirou sat at the dinner table, eating with everyone else, but his attention was averted when he noticed Asia trying to use chopsticks to eat her breakfast, and failing to do so, in a manner he found completely adorable.

Shirou frowned and pressed his hands together before a knife and fork appeared in his grasp, however, he was interrupted.

"Need some help Asia?" Irina asked as she sat next to the blonde.

Asia puffed her cheeks in frustration. "Y – Yeah… these sticks are hard to use…"

"Here, then let me show you."

Shirou simply smiled as he watched the two, dispelling the silverware in a small burst.

Shortly after finishing her food, Illya turned to Sella. "May I be excused?"

Sella, surprised by the girl's sudden formality, merely nodded dumbly. "Y – Yes, of course."

Illya responded with a gleeful giggle as she ran around the table and leapt onto Shirou's arm. "Let's play now!"

Shirou merely chuckled as he stood up, holding the girl. "Okay, okay. What do you want to do then?"

"A game!"

"Alright, let's go," he replied as he set her down and followed her to her room.

Irina smiled pleasantly as they left before frowning somewhat. "They sure are close, aren't they…?"

"Indeed…" Xenovia added with her frown, hers tinted with more suspicion than Irina's.

Smirking slyly, Lucretia offered, "Want some tips to get closer?"

The two just stared in silence.

Iri, smiling, interjected, "Please do. The blue one will give me some exotic grandbabies."

The two's expressions began to change dramatically red.

"Shall I help?" Maiya offered.

Their faces were now immensely red.

Erica then broke the tension as she commented, "I'd gladly do him."

The duo looked at her in shock as Iri smiled happily. "Oh how nice!"

Asia tilted her head in mild confusion. "Do him? Do what?"

Iri looked at her in shock.

Maiya, seeing this, noted, "Shall I?"

Iri immediately put her hands between Maiya and Asia, as if to further shield Asia. "No! She's too pure!"

"Accepted."

The blonde just tilted her head in further bewilderment.


Shirou, sitting on Illya's bed next to her, asked, "So… What are we pl –?" only to receive his answer as she plopped a gamepad into his grasp. "Ah…"

"Let's play!" she cheered with excitement.

Shirou, not wanting to dampen the mood, just nodded. "S – Sure…" 'How does this work again…? Hm…' Despite his lack of knowledge in video games, he surmised the one she got going was a racing game and nodded to himself. 'Well… This might be easy…'

Illya grinned with excitement as the game started, only for Shirou to immediately send his car zooming out ahead of hers. "F – Fast!" she exclaimed before starting hers, not two seconds out she failed a sharp turn and slammed into a barrier.

Shirou laughed quietly. 'Yup… drives just as bad as Mom…'


And done! I hope everyone enjoyed it. Be sure to let me know with a review if you did. If you were confused, unsure, or simply have questions on anything, let me know in a review and I will do what I can to address your concerns. Though if they are related to spoilers I cannot promise a satisfying answer here, as many people dislike spoilers; so you would be better served with a PM. If you did not enjoy it, review if you must, but try to have a point, please. Oh, and understand proper English diction. That said, enough babbling, until next time, bye-bye!