Disclaimer: I still don't own Black Butler, and I honestly never will.


The Gamer: Fun and Games

"Here, have this."

'This' was apparently a skill book. Well, a whole lot of them.

"You ate without me? How heartless" Kim was doing that thing with her eyes that creeped me out. Sparkles.
"You left right as I finished, there you have your salad, and the eggs are in the microwave."

Kim had apparently went and bought... "The survival medicine handbook?"
"It's basically figsht aid, thought it could be udgeful"
"Don't eat with your mouth full."

As Kim stuffed her face, I gave a cursory glance at the books she brought.
Kim was glancing at me from time to time.

'You have acquired a skill book [First Aid], do you want to learn this skill?
Y/N'

'You have acquired a skill book [Sewing], do you want to learn this skill?
Y/N'

'You have acquired a skill book [Photography], do you want to learn this skill?
Y/N'

"Why did you get me a book about photography?"
"Dunnow, I faw it in the library and fhought it waf cwool." I could barely understand her, with all of that food in her mouth.
It was a miracle she hadn't choked.

I glared at her.
She swallowed.

"Once you're finished with learning them I will bring them back to the library. At least we don't have to worry about losing them, seeing as they don't get destroyed. Ah, and show me how they work, I wanna see."

I learned all the skills books she brought me. At least I didn't have to worry about her spending all of her money in books for me.

Of course, it wasn't my business what she spent her money on, but I would feel bad if she spent it on me.

'Quest Update! Learn 3 new skills [any] 3/3 –complete-'

"I'm done". Right now, the best I could do was level up the skills I already had.

"Okay, I'll return those books... after I finish this."

I used [Observe] on the aforementioned 'this'.

'Fried eggs. Quality: Decent. Rarity: Common. A fried dish that satisfies hunger and restores Hp.
+0'3 Hp Regeneration
-20 Hunger.
+3 Hp.
Very bland, Could improve if you added something'

Huh, so food gives benefits. I should improve my cooking skill then.
If food can restore Health, then I will probably need it if I encounter a monster.

I hadn't forgotten the quest. Not only could I encounter monsters, but I also was supposed to kill a bunch of them.

I couldn't even harm a fly. Well, maybe I had killed my fair bit of flies, but only if they became annoying first, it was self-defense at best.
I don't think I could kill anything bigger than a rat.
Maybe not even the rat.

Even setting aside the morals of killing at all, my Strength Stat was laughable. My only chance to kill a monster was by making it laugh to death.

Well, thanks to that skill book Kim got me, I could try to tie up the monster and then kill it. But to tie up the monster I would need it to stay still. And if I could keep it still long enough to tie it, then I wouldn't need to tie it up in the first place.
It's not like I could politely ask the monster to stay still while I bashed its skull in.

Sigh. This was complicated. Why did I even need to complete that quest, though? I mean, the money was nice and everything but... I didn't see any penalty if I took too long or failed... aside from the obvious 'death' that is implied when you fail to kill a monster.

I think I should practice the rope skill, maybe at higher levels I can throw the ropes or even tie them up faster.

Huh, I really didn't think I would actually find that skill useful.

But for that I would need ropes, which I don't have. Not so useful after all.

Sigh.

Where would I get ropes? Where could I get ropes? Did I even need ropes, or could it be something like a piece of cloth?
I should try at least.

Going into my room I fetched some shirt I could break to get cloth. Didn't I have a shirt Kala munched on?
I hGad been planning to throw it away or repair it.
I had thought of learning to sew, to mend all of my clothes Kala had used as a chew toy.

Hey, now that I got that sewing skill I can actually mend all those poor shirts, thanks to the book Kim brought me.

I found a particularly ugly shirt, which I should have thrown away even before Kala destroyed it beyond repair. She had made me a favor by destroying it, really. And I was now going to extend its life expectancy.


'Rope tying has leveled up by one'

The sound of my alarm jolted me out of my tying practice. And from watching anime.

The alarm was the one that was supposed to warn me it was time to go to class.

"What's that?"
"The alarm to go to class"
"But we don't have class today."

I blinked. "We don't?" As long as I was aware, it wasn't a non-working day.
"Didn't you read the mail? The University sent an e-mail to say that, because of the earthquake risk, they would close the facility for the week. Gosh, you have to be more aware of these things, what would you have done if I hadn't warned you? I can already see you outside class, looking lost."

That... was suspiciously familiar, but different in some way. It was almost as if I had already had this conversation... but different somehow.

"I... guess." I was confused, I wasn't even sure why. This dreadful feeling had nested in my stomach, every word out of Kim's mouth making me terribly unsettled.

Uncomfortable, I got up from the couch where I had managed to level up [Rope tying] the great amount of five levels. After the fourth level, I had joined Kim in her anime watching (one punch man was the one chosen for this session), although the downside of multitasking was that I was less concentrated and only managed to get one more level before we were interrupted by the alarm.

I blinked, why had I gotten up from the couch? I forgot already. Not finding any good reason to be standing doing nothing, I ended up sitting again.

Kim was eyeing incredulously the knotted piece of cloth I had in my hands. I think she whispered something, but when I brought attention to it she denied having said anything of importance.

I kept tying and untying knots. We were both silent, although I didn't find it awkward. She had stopped the chapter when the alarm started ringing, and had failed to start it again, instead she was silently staring at the characters, stopped in time, in the middle of the battle, deep in thought.

I used that time to keep leveling up [Rope tying].

Suddenly, "Did you learn how to sew?"

I wasn't expecting that abrupt change of subject, and I only managed to get a "huh?"

She sighed exasperatedly at me, and clarified. "I got you a book about sewing, you wanted to learn to sew before, did you learn?"

Well, yes of course, she had gotten me the book to learn it. A nod.

"Show me".

To say I was confused was an understatement, I couldn't see her goal in doing all of this. Maybe she wants to see my ability in action?

"I need sewing supplies" I would need at the very least a needle and thread. We didn't have any of that in our home, as none of us knew how to use them.

"If you pay for them I know a place where to get them, I can go buy them for you and you pay me when I get back."
"I can purchase them myself, if you tell me where to do it."

Kim snorted so hard that it must have hurt. "And have you getting lost? Hell, no. You can get lost in a one way street, I'm not risking sending you somewhere you have never been to."

Hey, I wasn't... no, scratch that, yes, I was that bad.

Even that... traits thing had been aware of it.

I could try practicing the [First Aid] skill I had gotten. I wasn't cruel enough to keep watching one punch man without Kim. Even if it was the fourth time we watched it.

Not much after Kim left someone called at the house's phone, but when I answered whoever was on the other end hanged up immediately.
Probably a prank call. It wasn't very funny.

Would the [First Aid] level up, even if I wasn't treating real injuries? I wasn't about to injure myself, obviously, but it would be good to know if I need a real patient, or if I could do some mock-Healing as if it was a real situation to level up the skill.

After some time I gave up, this wasn't working, I would have to wait until someone got hurt to improve this, apparently. That, or I was doing something wrong.

I should stop, maybe I could give myself a breather or I would work myself to the bone.
I was fearing that, now that my whole life was a game, it wouldn't really be the same to play other games and wouldn't be as fun as before.

Regardless, I took Tofu out of hiding, and sat it next to my computer, the newest thing in my room.

Tofu was there for moral support mostly, I knew it couldn't give any real support, but, back before I had Kim, back before I had any friends at all, Tofu had been there, next to me to face the big bad internet. Especially if it involved that scary world of the online and multiplayer.

I wasn't about to play anything like that right now, but it had become such a long tradition that it would feel wrong to change it now. I could never play at anything if it wasn't with Tofu by my side.

What should I play? I was feeling like some mindless playing like a tick tack toe against a computer. Strange, but a classic game that I would hardly get tired of. On the other hand, I also had this game I liked very much, and could play that instead. As I tried to make a choice, I looked at the toy by my side.

Tofu... was a gift. A very precious one. He may look a little bit scary, but I wasn't afraid.
Most people, when asked to imagine an angry clown, got an unnerving image from some scary horror movie.

Tofu wasn't like that. He was a clown, yes, and he may be angry-looking, but... I just couldn't explain it, maybe it was because I had been with it for so long...

I just couldn't be scared of Tofu, there was something, maybe the way the hands were too big, maybe it was the way its feet would be easily as big as it's body, it could even be the way it's head was ridiculously big, paired with those small, angry eyes, that made me think, 'maybe it's not the cutest thing around, but it's definitely not scary'.

I was a master in getting scared, so the fact that I wasn't scared by it, made it impossible for me to understand people like Kim, who thought the clown was a possessed by the devil or something equally disturbing.

I didn't understand her very well, but apparently she didn't like Tofu. She didn't like me bringing him everywhere I went. She thought it was creepy and that I coddled it so much that it would somehow gain life and kill me in my sleep. Or her. Which didn't make sense.

I looked at Tofu. Nope, still not creepy. I just couldn't see him that way. I probably should know from an objective point of view that there was something unsettling in that toy, maybe it was the way its firebrick colored hair was always carefully in place, like he spent hours trying to look presentable.

Maybe it was the way its red nose was remarkably smaller than what would be expected in a toy. Or the paper-white skin. Maybe it was all of this. Maybe it was something else. Or it could be nothing at all.
Whatever it was I just couldn't find it.

I yawned. Until Kim gets back what should I do? I really couldn't decide what to play.

Oh, maybe I could finish that book I was reading. I think I left it in my bookcase...
Yes there it was.

Well, this seems like a good way to pass the time. Maybe not the most productive, but not a bad one.

...

As soon as Kala got up and quickly went to the door I knew Kim was back. Sure enough, not long after, the door started opening.

I had discovered that, even if a book wasn't a skill book, you could level up your Stats by reading. I had managed to get my Wisdom two levels higher.

Now that I remember, didn't I have a Trait about learning from books?
I should make sure.

'[Bookworm]: +15% skills and Stats learned from books, written assignments are +27% faster.'

Yes, I did have something like that, I should have realized sooner, then, that I could level up Stats from books. Not only that, but apparently I could also level up skills?

Maybe by actually reading the book that gave me the skill? It seemed like a possibility.

Uh, Kim had already returned the books she borrowed from the library. The one about [First Aid] would have been especially interesting to look at, as I couldn't level it up without having someone injured.

"I got what you needed. Now come here and start sewing. And pay up". As impatient as always. I could have sworn I heard something about eating her hat, but that didn't make sense, Kim didn't have a hat.

I retrieved the money needed to pay for the supplies and got out of my room.

As soon as I did so the cat tried to slip in. Luckily, Kala, who had been by my side as I got out, dissuaded Cat the cat from entering... by running after him like she was about to make him her next meal.

She wouldn't do it, and Cat knew that... probably. He still fled.

I went to the living room and picked up the supplies, paying for them.

"It's a bit pricey isn't it?"
"You're just a stingy miser, this is good quality. It's called an In-vest-ment. In the time this will last you, you would have gone through three of the lower priced ones you like to buy. And this is even taking into account your stingy ways, and refusal to throw anything away."

Wao, I got all of this just by mentioning the price seemed a bit over the top, maybe she wasn't in the best of moods.
I wasn't stingy, I just didn't like to waste; there was a difference.

Something must be on her mind.

And I wasn't the one who would pry it out of her.

I brought the Kala-ruined shirts and even a pair of pants that had a small hole, but were still serviceable.

I would leave them for last, just in case I messed up.

I grabbed one of the shirts and started sewing. It wasn't a masterpiece, as I just started, but I clearly knew the basics like I knew the back of my hand.

'Your [Sewing] has leveled up by one'

By the time I got to the pants I had leveled up twice more, with notable effects in my sewing ability.

"I'll be damned, someone get me a hat"
"What?"
"Nothing, just... keep going"

There were times things just slipped past my radar, things I detected but was unable to understand, and sometimes I would know exactly what was going on before anyone else. This, sadly wasn't one of the last examples.

I knew something strange had happened to Kim, and it somehow involved me, but she didn't want to admit it.

Kim wasn't a coward or bashful. But she had a tendency to... deny very fervently any accusation of doing something she wasn't supposed to. Or not doing something she was supposed to. Like the laundry thing.

Either way, I apparently wasn't smart or wise enough to understand my own friend.

"I know you have more clothes that would need a mend, so you can go do that... while I go look for a psychiatrist or something."

Blink, what? Why would she-? "What, why?"
"Joking, just... never mind. You're too nice, you know?"

What?! Wha- that didn't have anything to do with the conversation did it?

Was the psychiatrist for me? Or did she think she was crazy or needed psychological help because she had done something I should be angry about?

Was this about the price of the sewing supplies?

Had she pocketed a bit of my money? Had she knowingly picked the priciest one, knowing that I liked to save money?

I didn't mind! Just... well, maybe I did mind, but not if she felt bad about it!

"Are you okay?"
Turning to me, she teared up, and suddenly grabbed me in a crushing hug, tears flowing like fountains.

She was asking forgiveness for something I couldn't understand, with all that mucus and tears running down her face.

It was a bit disgusting, but I endured it stoically, such was the price for friendship.

I forgave her for... whatever she wanted my forgiveness for. And very awkwardly patted her in the back.

That was the most comforting stance I knew. Yes, I was a friendless, awkward wallpaper with the facial expression comparable with that of a turtle. Excuse me for not knowing how to comfort a sobbing mess.

This was beyond my ability.

I wonder if I could make this into an ability.
Probably not, or it would have appeared already. Or maybe I wasn't doing a very good job.
Both options were equally likely.

She sniffed and sobbed for a while, but when she decided he had enough of using me as a handkerchief she mumbled something about making it up for something.

I wasn't about to let her walk away in that state, so I offered to go with her to... wherever she was going.

"Sniff, you dun't hav' to. Sniff, I just... I want to..." she didn't get farther than that.

That just proved my point.

She couldn't go outside like that, she was a walking fountain, a blubbering mess, AND her hair was a bird's nest.

I went to the bathroom to retrieve a brush while Kim became closely acquainted with the box of handkerchiefs we stored near the TV (one never knows when an emotive death will appear in anime).

Kim's brush was under the mirror, as usual.

Taking a second to look at myself I met the usual sight: Dropping, tired blue eyes, shoulder length messy brown hair, pale skin that needed far more sunlight than it was getting, dried lips and an impressive case of insomnia-induced panda eyes.

If I took a little bit more care of myself I would look... pretty average. I was the epitome of a forgettable face.

My hair wasn't in an eye-catching hairstyle or dye, it was plain brown, loose and it looked a bit tousled (Kim hadn't been gentle when showing her sorrow).

My eyes, even if they were blue, they weren't that shiny sky blue that people imagined when wishing for blue eyes.

I had slightly long nails, and some scars on my fingers.

All in all, I was a wallflower, a side character.

It didn't help that my default expression was 'Deadpan', and I had a serious case of 'I had fun once and it was awful'.

It's not that I couldn't have fun, it's just... it didn't show on my face.

Extreme expressions ended up fake-looking when in my face, even if they were not. That is if they appeared at all. My face seemed made only for brooding.

I blinked, that's why I didn't like looking at myself in the mirror. Thoughts ended up becoming darker and more depressing.

I fled from the bathroom.

Dedicating myself completely to the task of combing through Kim's hair was slightly relaxing, I rather enjoy participating in this mindless task, I wish she had longer hair so I could enjoy it more, but she always complains that long hair is a hassle.

"When you go out later with your mutt can you buy some pads for me please?"

'Minor New Quest! [Grocery Shopping]

Quest requisites:

-Buy all the groceries needed and bring them home

Quest Rewards:

-Groceries

-250 Exp points

Y/N'

Ah, yes of course. A nod.

"Thanks"

I kept brushing.

Cat came in like a rocket, Kala hot on his heels. Kim and I watched as Kala put Cat's whole head in her mouth.

After a while struggling Cat managed to escape Kala's play-attack and jumped at her face. Kala being the good sport she was, despite being easily the size of five or six Cats, let herself fall on her side like she had been defeated.

Cat wasn't about to throw away the advantage she gave him and pounced on my dog like a tiger pouncing their prey.

"Observe"

'Name: Cat
Title: spider cat
Level: 3

Health: 2/2 Hp
Mana: 0/0 Mp

Str: 1
Vit: 3
Dex: 7
Int: 2
Wis: 1
Luck: 1

This cat may be a rescued stray from the streets, but in this house, he may as well be king. His master's 'little kitty'. Devious and sneaky. Nimble escapist.

Status:
[King]: This Cat is at its home territory, he is King and owner of everything there is.
+10 Happy +20 Content
[Rival!]: The king is fighting valiantly against the menace of the big bad doggo, longtime rival of the king. It is his mission to win the fight and show everyone his superior skills against a bigger opponent.
+20 Happy +30 Confident'

Just 2 Hp? He was delicate.

But Kala's play fight didn't seem to be doing him a single point of damage, so they should be fine.

I knew Kala was careful when playing with smaller things, but I almost expected at least a bit of damage.

It was funny to read the [Rival!] thing. Who knew this was such a big deal for Cat?
I wonder if it's any different for Kala.

The house telephone rang before I could find out.

I picked up the phone. No one was talking.
Three seconds later they hung up.

You have to be joking, again?
Sigh.

"Who was it?"
"I don't know, some stupid that likes to pull pranks on people."

I should get going and go out with Kala. And buy pads for Kim.

"You need anything else?"
"Ehh... I think we're out of milk?"

I went to look.

"No, there's still a whole pack of it in the kitchen."
"And paper?"

We could use some more paper, yes.

"And more of my soda! I don't want to run out!" Kim's soda was... simply put, horrible.

"Observe"

'Lip-Soda. Carbonated water that tastes like tears and vomit. Acquired taste. Steel taste buds required to drink this.
+3 to Mp Regeneration for 3 hours
-2 to Hp Regeneration for 3 hours
+2 Mp.'

I don't know how she can drink that. Even the game coincides that it doesn't taste good.

I took a paper and pen and wrote everything that was needed. Yes, even the soda.

To buy things every week we both left a certain amount of money in a purse and when we next needed to buy something for the house or both of us, we would use that money.

I took the purse, the leash for Kala and got dressed.

I made sure I didn't forget anything: List? Right in my hand. Leash? Yes, of course, looped around my hips. Purse? Yep. Tofu? In its usual place inside my sweater pocket. The dog?

"Kala~"

Yes, right here. Keys? Inside the tool belt. I believe that is everything I need.

Gently but firmly pushing the Cat away from the door with my foot (the escapist description wasn't a joke), I ventured into the world, dog by my side.


'You have encountered an empty Instant Dungeon. Do you want to enter?
Y/N'

What.

Eh?

I looked at my dog. She didn't look fazed or anything. She was the one who usually warned me if there was something wrong.

I might rely on her a little bit more than was normal, but I didn't have the best eyesight. Too much reading, Kim says.

I should go somewhere to have glasses prescribed to me but... that never happens. So I was half-blind at best.

Still, I made do. I usually took notice of movements, colors, sounds and smells before actual little details.

My dog, in the other hand was far more sensitive to anything that was slightly suspicious.

So I might have started to rely on her for a lot of things, when I was outside my home (which I knew like the back of my hand, and therefore didn't need help navigating)

Kala was like my danger alarm.
And she wasn't ringing.
But the game was warning me.

I didn't know what an instant dungeon was. Kala didn't seem to notice anything wrong except for the very fact that we had stopped.

I didn't notice anything that would hint to this 'dungeon thing'.

I could say yes and find out.
Or I could say no and possibly dodge a bullet.

I had Kala with me, which was a confidence boost.
On the other side I always felt less confident when I was away from home.

Would I be able to escape the dungeon afterwards? How would I escape? Would another alert warn me I could escape just like now?

This seemed to be related to the game, seeing as the only sign that there is something wrong comes from the alert.

Maybe I would be able to find out why I suddenly woke up with these abilities.

On the other hand, who said there was an answer at all? Maybe this wasn't related at all with my ability, and I could get in trouble for entering.

But... this said it was empty, right?

I opened the Inventory and dumped the groceries in it. Huh, this was convenient.
Just in case I put a hand on Kala's side, as I didn't want to accidentally get separated, and very reluctantly pressed 'Yes'.

For a moment I thought nothing had changed. But by the way Kala's ears suddenly perked up I knew.

Something had changed.

It was silent.

In the city, you could always hear a car or a bird or the bustling of feet as people walked to their destinations.

This was strange, uncomfortable.

It was unnatural.

It wasn't quiet in the way that it was completely silent, I still could hear my own breathing, instead it seemed like the whole city had been abandoned by all life.

Unsettling.

Kala seemed to think so, as her ears seemed to dart around in an attempt to find out what had happened, why it was so silent, where had all the noise gone.

"It's alright Kala, everything's alright."

Except that it wasn't because I was dreading the moment something would crawl out of the shadows and attack us.

Except that it didn't happen.

'You have entered an empty instant dungeon, to exit use [Escape ID]'

ID? Wasn't this famil- the Settings! I had disabled an option about automatically entering ID! I was lucky I had looked at the Settings, or I would have been very confused if I suddenly found myself here. So ID meant Instant Dungeon?

Escape ID, huh? And... How was I supposed to use it?

I halfheartedly raised a hand and called "Escape ID!" I think that when using active abilities I needed to say out loud the command, to activate them.

I'm not sure if I was expecting it to fail. Luckily it didn't.

'You have created a new Skill, [Escape ID]'

Huh. It worked. Well, no it didn't, I was still here, but at least I had created the ability.

Opening the Skills Menu I looked at my brand new skill. Because I had no idea what I just did.

[Escape Instant dungeon]: lvl 1.
Use your Mp to break the dungeon and escape from it or completely destroy it.
-If the user created the dungeon
Cost: 0Mp
-If the user is different from the creator of the dungeon, then chance of destruction = (Skill Lv+((Int+Wis):100))+Mp spent - (Opposing Int+Wis).
-If the creator from the dungeon is not the user and creator is not within the dungeon then. Chance of destruction x4.
Cost: Variable.

Oh, that was...
I could create dungeons?
Yes, that's most of what I actually got from all that. I wasn't a math geek. All of those formulas went right over my head.

I have very little Mp, so I doubt I can actually escape if the creator is around. But seeing as this is an empty dungeon then that means that the creator is not inside, right?

Maybe?
I was suddenly less sure about this. I should get out, this was a bad idea, bad, bad idea. Bad things happen to adventurous people.

I should turn around like the coward I was and run home. Once there I could have a look at creating my own dungeons or whatever.

"Escape ID!"

'You have not enough MP to activate [Escape ID]'

What?

Having a look at my status I saw that I must have somehow wasted my single Mp when trying to create the skill, because it was a pitiful 0/3 MP.

I could have started crying rivers. I didn't, though.

I just noticed I actually have 3 Mp now. And even then I was still needing to replenish it.

Didn't I have Kim's gag-inducing soda among the groceries?
Didn't that heal MP?

I must really be desperate to be even considering drinking that.

I took it out.

Did I really need to? I mean how long does it take to regenerate Mp naturally?
Did I even need to drink all of it, for its effects to be of use?

Crossing my fingers I took a sip.

Only highly developed suppression of gag reflex allowed me to drink that mouthful of soda.
That didn't make it less awful.

Disgusting. I hope that is enough.

A wail of despair. It wasn't. I needed to drink all of it. I felt like puking.

I couldn't do it.

A growl.

A bark.

I knew Kala's bark better than I knew my own voice.

That bark wasn't Kala's.

OhMyGosh WhatWasThat?!

...

What.
Was.
A.
Wolf.
Doing.
In.
Here.

It didn't seem very happy with us.

The thing was big and black and the size of a freaking house. It was the size of an elephant!
Not that I had ever seen an elephant in real life. I think it was the size of an elephant.

Observe gave a name to call this hellish thing that could give Cerberus a run for its money.

'Name: Biscuit
Title: None
Level: 23
Hp: 149
Mp: 11

Str: 48
Vit: 27
Dex: 29
Int: 2
Wis: 1
Luck: 1

A Demon Hound. The Smartest of the Hell hounds, can breathe fire and change into a humanoid form. Don't expect to be able to negotiate with it though, the Demon Hounds only listen to those they deem worthy.
It seems you invaded its resting place and it's not very happy. Don't expect to live much longer.'

WHO THE HELL HAD THE BRILIANT IDEA OF NAMING THIS THING BISCUIT!
AND LOOK AT THOSE STATS! LOOK AT THEM!

I was dead meat. I would become its chewing toy for the rest of my life.

I chugged down Kim's Soda like my life depended on it, because it did.

I was so dead. Kala would probably become this monstrosity's plaything, if she was lucky.

Was THIS the type of monsters I had to kill?! And five of them?! The game was crazy.

The game was crazy and it wanted to kill me.

"Escape ID!"

I was firmly grabbing Kala's collar in an attempt of preventing her from charging (or fleeing, she looked pretty scared, too) the monster.

'Escape ID failed.'

OMG this wasn't working! My chance was too low! I was too stupid!
And here I actually meant with low Int, but I might as well be really stupid.
Too stupid to live. That's what I was.

Of course Dalia, you see a mysterious alert, and what do you do? Meddle in things you shouldn't! And now we're going to dieeeee.

Kala started wagging her tail at the hellthing.

No Kala nooooo, this is way out of your league! This thing doesn't want to play! It's annoyed at us for being stupid morons!

I was in the middle of panicking and if Kala leaves to go play with a thing the size of a freaking mammoth I might as well surrender myself to insanity. My heart cannot take this.

Kala, brave, valiant Kala approached that big bad demon wolf thing.

And started playing.

"Biscuit" didn't seem very amused. I could see that, and I wasn't a dog.

Sadly Kala was socially inept when it came to understanding when someone didn't feel like playing, and started running around the dog-wolf-Demon-devil-thing.

She even pulled her favorite move when playing: turn around and smack somedog's face with the side of her rear, followed by a sneak attack, Instant retreat or playful smile depending on how she was fancying.

Of course the thing was massive, and she barely smacked its left paw.

The difference in size between them was as big as the difference between Cat and Kala.

Meaning this thing could easily fit half of my dog inside its mouth.

I think my mind broke or something. I was much calmer.

Was this because of that Gamer's mind thing?

I could not defeat it, I could not escape.

I really didn't know what to do.

Apparently Kala already decided what she wanted to do.
That happened to be something among the lines of 'play with this massive creature that has a resting face that induces nightmares and fear in the hearts of people'.

Sometimes I thought my dog was very smart. This was not one of those times.

I should probably look for a corner to start crying in, this looks like it will take a while.

At the very least the demon seemed to stoically accept all of Kala's attempts at playing, without really engaging in attempts of its own.

Maybe it was tired?

It somehow reminded me of Kala after our walks, when she's lazily trailing behind, or when Cat tries to play with her, but she just got back and doesn't feel like it.

Responding, but not initiating.

The thing sat, and for a moment I thought that quake alert had been true.

"Biscuit" was completely on its side, with Kala being a nuisance around it.

I think it though us too stupid to die.

At least I was pretty sure Kala was.

But, things had not changed at all.
I still couldn't escape from here.
I was apparently going to need to wait until the dog broke the dungeon or left. Or I could keep downing that horrible soda and trying to escape.

My stomach was still throwing a fit for my previous recklessness, so that was out. Urgh... my poor tummy... I gagged.

But now I had a slightly enhanced Mp Regeneration so I could keep trying to escape as my Mp recovered.

This was going to take more than a little while.


'Minor Quest Complete! [Groceries]

Reward:
-Groceries
-250 Exp points

"Hello..."
"You look like shit. Are you okay?"

Why thank you, it only took four hours to get that mutt to break the dungeon for us.
And for my trouble I got covered in slobber from head to toe, as thanks for having the great idea of offering my meat-groceries to a giant demon mutt.

"Yes..."
"You took longer than normal... Did you get assaulted by the dogs at the park? You didn't buy the meat before going to the park, right? You know that never ends well, right?"

I knew, and while I had technically bought the meat before going to the park, everything should have been fine, because I had it in my inventory. Except that I got trapped by a Giant-Demon-Cerberus-Thing and only escaped after I gave it my food as sacrifice.

In the end it didn't matter, I went back and bought more meat. And soda. This time with my money.

My face must have said something I didn't because she sighed exasperated, and then started laughing.

"Go have a bath or something, I can cook today."
"No, I will cook. After I bathe." I wanted to level up cooking. That would let me cook an item that could heal Hp and Mp. I could store it in the Inventory and see if they spoiled in there. Then hopefully this wouldn't happen again.

"Okay, definitely not complaining here".