Peeta

"I wanted to go back to get her, Peeta. And Finnick," Johanna Mason sits next to my bed. "When Katniss blew the force field, I couldn't move. Too close to the lightening tree, I guess."

I look at her. I know I can't blame her for Katniss being left behind. I don't even know who to blame. Haymitch for ignoring our deal? Plutarch for putting this plan in motion to begin a rebellion? Finnick, for not cutting out Katniss' tracker instead of mine? "I love her, you know," I say softly. "I've loved her since I was five years old."

"I know," Johanna replied.

"It was never an act for me. And after my heart stopped when I hit the force field, I don't think it was an act for her either."

"I know, Peeta."

I shut my eyes. Willing myself not to let any tears escape.

The monitor across the room blinks on, softly playing the theme accompanying so many mandatory viewings from the Capital. Caesar Flickerman pops on screen. "Hello! Welcome all my wonderful viewers to a very special edition of The Hunger Games review. The Quarter Quell. What really happened in that arena? I'm here, with our very favorite girl on fire, Katniss Everdeen."

I gasp loudly, tears springing to my eyes as I finally see my beautiful girl. She is beautiful, despite the very prominent dark splotches under her eyes. "What have they done to her?" I ask rhetorically. She's lost weight since I'd last seen her…10 days ago? Is that how long it's been?

"She's alive, Peeta. That has to mean something," Johanna replies.

"Hello Caesar," Katniss says. No smile for the cameras.

"Katniss. Walk me through what happened in the arena,"

Katniss looks from the camera to Caesar. "Well Caesar, I can tell you that I had no idea something bigger than us, than the games, was set in motion after Peeta and I nearly ate nightlock in the 74th Hunger Games. I can tell you that I was prepared to die in that arena to keep Peeta safe."

"But what was going through your mind when you shot the arrow that blew out the force field in the arena?" Caesar leans toward Katniss. I clutch at my sheets.

"I can tell you that before the announcement of the Quarter Quell, I was expected to perform a certain way to calm any uprisings that were happening in the districts. I can tell you that I did not perform as well as expected, people continued to defy the Capital in the districts, and in reaction I was sent to a second hunger games. My wonderful Stylist, Cinna, was brutally killed in front of me seconds before I entered the arena for the Quarter Quell, only because he turned me into a mockingjay with a dress." Katniss' voice has become more frantic with each word uttered. Caesar holds up his hand and tries to interrupt Katniss, but she's still talking. "President Snow expects me to say the right things, and do the right things, to pacify the districts. I will not be doing that. I will not bow to pressure to say certain things now, not when my district has been burned to the ground, and I know Peeta is safe. I can tell you, without any reservations, that I love Peeta with everything that I am."

I stop breathing as I hear what she's said. She looks straight at the camera. "I would have died for him in the arena. I'm living in captivity for him. And I would die for him now. Peeta, if you can see this, if you can hear me, I love you. I'm so sorry I figured it out too late."

Caesar looked frantically around him, as if he expected someone to turn off the cameras, to shut Katniss up. I sit up in my bed looking at my girl, and watched her, so very proud of her.

She continues to talk. "I can tell you I'm expected to address Panam and call for a cease fire. But I will not do that. I will not do that Caesar, and I will tell you why. We have lived in a world that accepts that every year for 75 years, it is acceptable to send children to their deaths. We have lived in a world that thinks it's normal for the Capital to live to excess, to eat and eat, and throw up only to eat more, while the people living in the districts starve. I know Peeta, wherever he is, is safe. I can only suspect that my family is dead. I will not say what President Snow wants me to say, and I will not be used as a tool to hurt Peeta," she is cut off when a peacekeeper appears, backhanding her face.

"Katniss!" I scream.

She falls to the ground, her face hitting the floor. Blood splatters surround her head and I see her chest move as the cameras turn off. Oh God. She's breathing. She's alive, but for how long? They will never let her live, not after what she said. I start screaming. I jump from my bed, ripping out my IV. I grab a nearby table and throw it across the room.

"Peeta!" Johanna screams at me, but her frantic call does nothing to calm my rage. A nurse rushes in, along with some people I assume are soldiers. The soldiers run for me, pushing me up against a wall while I struggle. The nurse injects me with something, making me weak. My final thought before succumbing to the darkness, is of Katniss' beautiful face, laying on the ground surrounded by blood. She doesn't even know her family is alive.