Over the next weeks Magina found out that he had a problem with mice. He addressed this when the vet came over one day for the cattle. The vet shook her head to Magina' question about poison or stuff. Not good for the environment. Too dangerous for other animals.

Traps weren't an option, either, because there were too many. He could place traps all over but he'd have to check on them constantly and there had to be many. A work that would take too much time. AT least for him. The rabbits were bad enough already.

But the vet had another option for Magina. He could get himself a cat. Or maybe two cats, considering that one alone wouldn't be able to get rid of all these critters. It was a good idea, Magina thought. Cats were beautiful animals and relatively easy to care for when they were barn cats. So he agreed and a week later the vet brought two with her. She also gave Magina some things he might need and told him all about cat care he had to know. While the vet checked the horses, Magina took the cats into the house. They should be allowed to move in and out of every building so they could find every hiding place of the mice. He hoped it would work but if not he could still think about other options for the mouse problem.

The remaining week was vet time. All animals were checked, the horses, dogs and chickens. The cattle had been looked after the week before, there were just a few check-ups due after some treatments. Magina liked the vet because she never cared about people. She focused on the animals so much that she almost never looked at the humans. At first he had assumed it was only him, that she didn't look at him because of his history but she did it with everyone. Magina had seen her do it on the market in town and that had been the moment he had decided he liked her. Because she just didn't care about humans and their stories. Except when they had to do with animals of course. But even when she was talking to a person she almost always petted a dog or cat or something in the meantime. She was always surrounded by one pet or the other. As if they were drawn to her, knew how much she cared for them.

It was expensive to have the vet come over but it was necessary. And it was good, because Magina sometimes missed the signs of an illness, as much as he tried to see everything. And it was something he was willing to pay for and which he did gladly. He'd rather buy less for himself than skip a vet week.

Calving season came and Magina was on his feet almost twenty-four seven. He slept outside, near the cattle, only leaving for short periods of time to eat and look after the other animals. He was glad that the cats had adapted quickly and could mostly fend for themselves. This was hard work with little time to sleep. So whenever there was a break, Magina slept. No matter what time of day or where he was. He simply lay down at a place that wasn't too uncomfortable, which just meant not rocks.

Maybe he should think about hiring help. He had been alone for a very long time now and it would be so much easier to do all the work when he could split it with a second person. But then he'd have to see whoever it was every day, would have to talk with them and stuff. Magina wasn't sure if he wanted that. It seemed constricting somehow. He didn't want to always have someone around, he liked being alone.

At that he thought of Kael. He sighed. He knew nothing about the man other than that he was beautiful. And that he liked kissing him. He couldn't know if he'd like to have him around. Maybe Kael was dumb. Or strange. Or vain. Or didn't like to get his hands dirty. He could as well be some pampered rich boy, considering the extravagant clothes he had worn.

Finding that out would require time. Something Magina didn't have. He sighed again. He couldn't even be sure if the man wanted to spend time together or just wanted to get laid. If it was the latter, Magina with his actual state of only having kissed someone, once, was probably not the best option for a satisfactory lay.

With having no phone to call Kael he supposed it might be a moot issue the next time they met.

This night Magina stared at the stars. He lay on his back in the grass, arms crossed under his head, a dog curled up on each of his sides. He was tired but it had been a quiet day (for calving) and he wasn't able to fall asleep. His thoughts circled around Kael. Magina felt almost obsessed, the way he couldn't stop thinking about the man. But he couldn't help it. He knew that it was all imagination, that the man was probably not half as perfect as he made him in these fantasies, but his heart nonetheless ached because he knew that he couldn't be in any kind of relationship with him. How would it be like, to lie here, side by side, together with him? To talk, to hold hands, to cuddle? To kiss underneath the stars? He dreamt about it this night and when he opened his eyes and Kael wasn't there, he was confused. It took a few moments for him to wake up and realize that it hadn't been real.

Magina sat in the grass and rubbed his eyes. The sun was just rising on a cloudless sky. His stomach growled. One of his dogs patted over and nuzzled his arm. The other was still dozing while three had remained on the ranch. For about a minute he indulged in the remains of the dream, in the feeling of happiness and contentment. Then he pushed it all away and got up to do the day's work. The most stressful part of the calving season was over but that didn't mean he could slack off now.

When the next market was held in town, Magina wasn't able to go. There had been a problem with some of the cattle and the vet was there. And in addition to it, he had found a part of the fence that needed to be repaired. Stuff he couldn't, no matter how much he might want to, postpone. He'd have to go into town on a different day to buy the things he needed. He couldn't leave now.

It was about a week later before he had actually the time to drive away for a few hours. Still he was anxious all the time and was back as fast as he could. A few of his cows were sick and Magina had to keep an eye on them.

At least his mice problem had gotten better, the cats being more helpful than he had expected. There were still mice around, of course, but not so many and they weren't in the house anymore. And the cats also helped to keep birds away from his garden, something that he had taken for granted until now, having birds eat berries and seeds.

All in all, though it was exhausting, the ranch went astonishingly well. And when the next market was, Magina went to sell cattle. It had been a year since he had been there, a year since he had kissed Kael in the parking lot, next to his car, for everyone to see. One year since the man had told him to call, which he hadn't done.

First business. Then shopping. And then he walked over to the rodeo circuit, leaving his two dogs at the truck. Magina was unsure what he'd do. Would he just watch and leave? Did he actually want to talk to Kael? Maybe he should apologize and explain. He stayed at the back, trying to find the man while being in a place where he couldn't be spotted too easily. But as soon as he saw Kael, he just had to get closer. While doing so, he moved towards the entrance of the circle, where the man would get out once he was finished. He just couldn't stay away. The man was amazing. Even more than Magina remembered. The dreams he'd had throughout the last year had definitely gotten less frequent, the image of Kael duller, diffuse.

Now that he saw him, Magina felt the need to talk to him. He wanted to apologize, wanted to explain. And so he waited. It seemed Kael took his time before leaving the circle and his horse. Magina didn't have that much time to dally around but this was important to him. Then he'd just sleep an hour less the next night to catch up on the time he had been in town (which was hard considering how little he already slept). But some things were more important than sleep.

Kael spotted him directly as he left. He didn't react other than faltering in his steps for a split second. He didn't come over, didn't smile, nothing, just kept walking. He was probably angry at him. At least Magina would understand if the man was. He followed Kael, who spun around as soon as he realized it.

"Oh, now you wait?" Kael looked at Magina with indifference but at least he had stopped.

They were in the middle of a path through the market, people all around them. "Um, can we go somewhere more private, please?"

The request got him a haughty look but then Kael nodded. He turned without a word and so Magina just followed. They walked away from the market further into town until only very occasionally a person was seen. They were probably all on the market.

"What do you want?" Kael crossed his arms in front of his chest. His hat shaded his eyes but Magina could still see the frown.

He knew what he wanted to say but at the first try the words got kind of stuck. He cleared his throat and tried again. "I wanted to apologize. For not calling. I'm sorry. I wanted to tell you the last time but you were gone too fast. I don't have a phone, I couldn't call."

The frown deepened. "You are kidding me. Everyone has a phone."

"I don't."

"Okay, maybe." He didn't sound as if he believed it. "But there has to be a phone on the farm. And the others working there must have phones. You could've borrowed one."

"I swear to you, there is no phone on the farm. Nowhere." He didn't say anything about there being no others. Though, now that he thought about it, maybe he could've borrowed the phone of his vet for a few minutes. Well, too late for that now.

"Where do you live? Out in the sticks? How can no one on your farm have a phone?" Anger seeped into his voice. He clearly didn't believe him.

"It is true, I'm sorry. Otherwise I would've at least called to tell you I have no time to meet with you. I'm not an arsehole." Kael didn't look convinced. He leaned against the wall of a house at his back, arms still crossed.

"You would've told me you have no time."

"Yes. I can't leave the farm for a few hours. Market about twice a year is the absolute limit. I'm sorry, I would've really liked to meet you and get to know you."

"I know there is a lot of work on a farm, but there is always free time as well. I'm not sure if you are telling the truth because it seems so unimaginable."

"I am! Why would I not call you? I'd do anything with you if I could. You are the most beautiful and breath-taking man I've ever seen! If I could, I would've stayed last time, I'd have called as often as you wanted me to, I'd stay today. But I can't. I have responsibilities and I can't just skirt them." Truth had to be a rare thing among people. Magina couldn't remember how it had been on the farm, before. Had they lied? Had they not spoken their thoughts? He didn't know. But he could see how the truth, how what he said affected Kael. It was like before, when he had told him about the dreams. The man seemed stunned by the words. Did no one ever tell him how gorgeous he was? Or didn't people tell each other things like that? Did he have to imply it somehow, mask it within other topics? He didn't know and he didn't care. There was nothing wrong with telling the truth or revealing one's thoughts.

His opinion only hardened when Kael grabbed him by his arms and spun them around, so Magina was pressed against the wall. Before his mind could see this as some kind of assault and react to it, the man kissed him. He brushed one hand through Magina's hair, knocking his hat off in the process, and almost immediately deepened the kiss.

Magina's head swam by this sudden action but he kissed back instantly. His body responded without conscious thought, pressing against Kael. The wall at his back gave him good footing as he tried to get closer. It felt amazing and he moaned into the kiss as his body responded to all the sensations. He grabbed Kael's shirt at his back, fisting both hands into the fabric.

The kiss was amazing. Not that Magina had any other kisses to compare it to, but he felt lightheaded and hot and hard within mere seconds. What Kael did with his tongue, how he sucked and licked, how he stroked in and out of Magina's mouth, how he moved his lips, it was perfect. Magina tried to keep up, to give as much as he got but his thoughts were hazy, at best. His hips rubbed against Kael's, feeling the hardness there and he just wanted to get more of it. He knew that if he kept that up, he'd come soon. But no matter how embarrassing that would be, he couldn't stop.

Especially when Kael began to move his hips, too, and panted, his moans so soft they were almost inaudible. Every tiny sound sent sparks through his body and made his cock twitch. He had never felt like that before. And then Kael pushed one hand into Magina's pants and squeezed his arse. He had to break the kiss or he'd never get enough air into his lungs. His breaths were harsh and too uneven and it felt so good he couldn't contain his moans of pleasure. He buried his face in the man's hair (when had he discarded his hat?). It smelled like sun and horse and something different, something nice, probably his shampoo or something.

Accidentally Magina brushed against Kael's ear with his lips. The answer to it was a jerk, a shudder and a moan. Just to see if this was a positive or a negative reaction, he did it again, this time deliberately, even licking over the shell with the tip of his tongue. The answer this time was definitely positive as Kael pushed his other hand into Magina's pants and pulled their hips together tightly, circling and pushing, his movements getting faster and more erratic. He couldn't concentrate on Kael's ears anymore but he kept his face where it was, his breath ghosting over the tip of the ear with every gasp.

Kael shuddered, then he moaned softly and with another shudder he came. Magina knew it but he would've needed just a minute more to follow. Now he wasn't sure what to do. Kael was completely motionless except for one shudder after the other while Magina thought his head might explode. He squeezed his eyes shut and tried to wait this out. All tension left the man and he slumped against Magina, his forehead resting against the wall at his back.

That had been… too good to be described with words. But Magina was still in a haze, he was still hard and though he was unbelievably proud to have brought this beautiful man to orgasm, without even being naked or something, he was aching all over and just wanted to get off. He would've rubbed himself off, just there, but Kael still held him too tightly to get a hand between their bodies or to move his hips.

"Hey Sunstrider!"

A voice from somewhere behind them made Kael startle. He straightened and spun around while Magina was still collecting his thoughts and trying to get his body back under control. Suddenly he was very aware of where they were. In the middle of the town. In a side alley but still right there, in the open. Oh shit.

"Sunstrider, what the hell are you doing here? Go somewhere more private!" There was a second man with the one who had called first, and now they both laughed.

"Looks like you had some fun here!" They laughed again.

"What do you want?" Kael sounded slightly annoyed.

"I was sent to look for you. The next rodeo begins in half an hour and you haven't shown up yet to take your place." A pause. "You should consider changing your pants, first, though."

With another laugh, the two strode away. "See you later, sunny-boy!" One of them called before blowing a kiss at Kael.

Magina was still leaning against the wall. He hadn't seen much of the two, had been half hidden behind Kael's back. He supposed whatever they had been doing here was over, no matter the state of his body. He'd simply take care of it at home. Or maybe, in his truck. He bent down to take his hat when he was hit by a sudden realization: The two men just now, they had called Kael 'Sunstrider'.

Dread formed in his gut as he got up again. Kael had turned back and taken his hat, as well, but hadn't put it back on. He held it in his hands and smiled some half smile. "Um, sorry for that." He grimaced a little. "Well, sorry for all of it. I got carried away, I know better than to fool around in the middle of town. And, um, sorry for, well, let's say, losing it." He looked at his hat and then low-key moved it over his crotch, where a telltale wet spot had formed.

It all didn't matter and Magina barely registered what Kael was saying. He had only one thing on his mind now. "You are a Sunstrider?"

With his grin gone and a frown on his face, the man nodded. "Yes, why? Is something wrong?" He must've picked up on the change in Magina's behaviour. There was something wrong, definitely. It was the fact that he had just been kissing a Sunstrider. Had been rubbing against him and made him come! A Sunstrider.

He had to get out of here. The arousal was gone, all good feelings were gone, replaced by things like disgust and anger. Hate. Magina wasn't sure yet if he hated himself or only the man in front of him, but he knew that he had to get away. This…

He straightened. "Don't ever come near me again." He pulled his hat low over his face and walked past Kael, careful not to touch him.

"What?" Kael blinked, not comprehending what was happening. "Why? What's the matter? It… I already said I'm sorry!"

Since he didn't slow down or anything, Kael almost yelled the last words. It wasn't about what had happened just now, it was about what had happened a decade ago. He had buried it deep enough so it wouldn't affect his everyday life, even though everything on the farm reminded him of before. But every time he met a Sunstrider, it resurfaced. He hadn't known Kael was one of them, he was too young for him to remember, Magina guessed. He must've been a boy, then, just like him.

He didn't remember how he got back home. His mind had shut off and he had driven his truck without even thinking about it. He greeted his dogs and let them bring him to the ground where he cuddled with all of them. Usually he didn't have very much time to pet them and play with them, but now he took this time. He needed it, needed the connection to another living being that he called friend. The five were happy about the attention. Magina pulled himself together for the remaining day, doing his chores and looking after all his animals. But when he lay in bed late that night, the memories came flooding back.

It had been a long time since Magina had left a light on during the night, but today he couldn't bear the darkness. He lay on his bed and stared at the ceiling. How could that have happened? How could he have fallen for a Sunstrider?

Sleep didn't come easily and then Magina was plagued by nightmares. Until in one of them, Kael appeared. At first Magina was sure this was all getting worse but strangely, the man took him by his hand, in the middle of fire and chaos and death, and just led him away. Magina was, even in his dream, too stunned by this turn of events not to follow the Sunstrider. As soon as they had left the farm with all the horrors happening, the dream changed, from a nightmare to the all too familiar erotic dream.

The dream was more intense than before, which was surely because of what they had done in town. And because the memories where fresh. After the nightmare, Magina sank into the comfort this dream gave him.

Only when he woke up was he disgusted by himself and by his weak mind. He was aroused but for nothing in the world would he jerk off to the image of a Sunstrider in his head. The fact that he'd done so for over a year now was pushed far away. He couldn't change anything about that now but he didn't have to go on with it like before. Not now that he knew who Kael was.

Magina wasn't sure if he dreaded the nightmares or the erotic dreams more when he fell into bed the following night. With every night in which he dreamt, which was almost every night, he was more on edge. Of course some mornings he couldn't remember but on way too many he could and he hated his mind for giving him all these images about Kael. And his body for reacting to them so strongly. He couldn't really do anything about it though, he couldn't make himself stop dreaming. He tried, he tried to change the dreams, tried to push his thoughts about Kael so far into the back of his mind that they couldn't crawl back, but it was no use. His dream-self wanted to be with Kael. And it cared nothing about the wishes of the awake-self.

As it had been before, when the memory faded, the dreams grew less intense. But they didn't go away.

Everything else was fine. The farm was good and the animals were, too. Magina was actually proud about what he accomplished every day. It was hard, no doubt, but it payed off.