Hey y'all!!! This is the part of my poular stories where I advertise my not popular stories. The Napier Coven is a comedy with a little bit of drama, tradey, and romance. Also, my new story: All of the Other Ones is about a war between mythical creatures, but not just Vampires and Werewolves...

Enough promoting. Enjoy!


Emmett sat there, tapping his pencil on the desk. He had been there for hours thinking of more innuendos. So far, the only things he had written was a dirty joke, seven different terms for vagina, and a drawing of himself as a superhero. He was having a mental block.

Jasper walked up to him, holding a box. "How's it goin'?" Jasper asked knowingly.

Emmett glared at him. "What's in the box?"

"Well, Alice saw that you would need some help..."

"You're helping me?" Emmett asked questioningly.

Jasper shrugged. "Alice saw that even with this-" he held up the box "-you won't win."

"You can take your box and shove it up your..."

"As I was saying." Jasper dropped the box on the desk, making Emmett jump. "In here is five objects. You'll get ten points for each one you get Bella to use."

Emmett peeked in the box, and his jaw dropped. "How... Holy... What... No," he stuttered. He looked up at his brother, or at least who he thought was his brother. When did Jasper turn into a demon bent on Bella's destruction?

"Are you going to do it?" Jasper said after a while.

"What about Edward? What about Bella's health?"

Jasper rolled his eyes. "Bella will be perfectly fine. Trust me. As for Edward, that part of the bet still stands. However, you don't have to do it. I'm sure your picture of a superhero is a metaphor for something sexual." Jasper laughed before leaving.

Emmett searched through the box. He knew Bella would never even think about using half this shit. But when he saw one item, Emmett had hope. A plan started to form in his head. He only had two and a half weeks before the wedding, so he knew he had to act now.

At a different time in a different place...

"Are you sure you don't want me to stay with you tonight?" Edward asked.

"No," Bella answered. "I need some time alone to think about things."

"Okay," he groaned before kissing Bella goodnight. He left as she went into her house. Once Edward was far enough away, Emmett moved in. He knocked three times on the door and took a deep breath. Here goes nothing.

Charlie opened the door. He was surprised. "Emmett? What are you doing here?"

"Hi Charlie. I wanted to talk to Bella. May I come in?"

"Uh...sure." He stepped aside as Emmett walked in and went straight to the kitchen. He knew it was a stretch on so many levels, but he had to try.

He opened the fridge and pulled out a can. "He Charlie. Have you ever tried Red Bull?"

"No, but I've heard it's nasty."

Emmett turned around to face him. "It's not nasty. You've gotta try one." Emmett held the can out. His only thought was 'Do it.'

Charlie grabbed the can and opened it. He took one sip and spit it out. "Oh God." He gave the can back to Emmett and wiped his mouth. "That is awful."

"Oh well. See ya later." Emmett smiled knowing that his plan was working perfectly. He quickly walked up the stairs and stood outside Bella's room. Not knowing what to do with the excess Red Bull, he drank half of it. He had the same reaction as Charlie. But Emmett made sure not to spit any out. He could feel the drink rolling around in his stomach, making him sick. But he knew that he had to finish his plan.

He pulled out the flask from his pocket and filled the can back up. He swished it around a little before knocking on Bella's door.

"What do you want, Charlie?"

"It me. Can I come in." Emmett tried to use his sorry voice, witch was hard being that he has never been sorry.

"Fine," Bella huffed. The last thing she wanted was more of Emmett's bet shenanigans. Yes, she knew all about the bet. She isn't that mad at Emmett. More at Jasper for even thinking of it.

Emmett put on his sorry face and opened the door. Bella was sitting on her bed. He sat next to her.

"I'm sorry, Bella. I should have never agreed to that stupid bet."

Bella looked over at him in shock. "Are you saying you're going to stop acting like an asshole?"

Emmett sighed. He never knew how hard it was to apologize. "Yes. Here." Emmett held out the Red Bull. "Peace offering?"

Bella took it with a smile. "Thanks Emmett. I would hate to have a grudge against you when I become stronger than you."

"Yeah. Me too," he said nervously.

Bella took a big gulp of the Red Bull. Emmett cringed. He was sure that he was going to be caught. But he wasn't.

Bella licked her lips. "It tastes a little watered down. Why was it open?" Bella started to get scared. She thought she was being paranoid, but she was really figuring out Emmett's plan.

"A let Charlie have a taste. You should have seen his face."

Bella calmed down. Emmett tensed up. All that was left was to wait.

It didn't take long.

Within four minutes, Bella had finished the entire can. She has leaning against Emmett shoulders, hiccuping.

"Hey-hic-Emmett," Bella asked after being quiet for a while.

"Yes?" he asked nervously. He had never been around drunk people, but he knew that it wasn't going to be pretty.

"Do you-hic-have a-hic-big penis?"

"What!" Emmetts' eyes almost popped out of his head.

"It's just that-hic-you have so many-hic-muscles." Bella started rubbing Emmett's arm. "I was wonder-hic-ing if they were all-hic-over."

"What have I done," Emmett mumbled to himself. "Bella, I think it's time for you to go to bed." Emmett laid her down.

She giggled. "Okay. Are you going to stay with me?"

He shook his head and pulled the blanket over her. "I want you to stay here and go to sleep. Understand?"

She giggled again and nodded.

"Okay. Goodnight Bella."

Emmett got up and walked to the door.

"Goodnight-hic-big penis."

Emmett left before Charlie could see him.

Thirty-two more, Emmett thought. I am completely and totally fucked.


Don't worry everyone. There's more 'drunk Bella' to come. Woops, 31! *wink wink* OK, I need more ideas for the box. What do you want to see Bella use? And don't forget, whoever names the stakes of the bet gets a prize. So review me your ideas.

Edit: I am an idoit. Did no one catch that it said 38? Well, it's fixed now.