Internal Conflict

Minerva and Catherine stood on the platform of the Hogsmeade station, shivering slightly in the chill September dusk. A cold wind made the leaves of the trees whisper and stirred the hems of their skirts.

They heard the train long before they saw it, and their apprehension grew as the signs that the train was approaching increased. After shying away from the larger students, they joined a large huddle of other First Years. When a rough-looking man called for them to follow, he led them down a steep, twisting path. The students clung to one another for support until the path flattened out and the sight of twenty-some boats greeted them. Catherine and Minerva were followed into their boat by a thin girl with long, blonde hair and another girl with curly, mousy brown hair left loose to hang to the middle of her back.

Minerva was startled when the boats glided from the shore unprompted. The rippled trails left by the boats were the only sign they left as they silently passed. Catherine slid closer to Minerva, as if it was Minerva's turn to be the brave one. She knew no more than Catherine; she had never discussed this with Professor Dippet or her parents.

One by one, the boats slipped through an arch covered by heavy, hanging ivy that was damp to the touch when pushed aside by their hands. Each boat glided to a pebbly, narrow shore, paused to let its passengers disembark, and slid silently away from the shore, into the dark recesses of the cavern.

Once the shore was covered by students, their whispers echoing off of the rough, torch-lit walls, the man who had led them to the boats raised his lantern as if counting, then turned and pulled the heavy metal door at the back of the cavern open, revealing a staircase cut into stone. At the top, he led them into a small waiting chamber and left them.

Panic set into a few students. They wondered if they would somehow be weeded out, the chosen few led further into the castle and the rejected sent home in disgrace. Just as one large-mouthed boy was proposing that they escape the selection by climbing through the window and dropping to the water below, the doors opened. Some students leapt back in surprise or fear; Minerva couldn't tell which. But she let go of the fear she had subconsciously been harboring when she saw it was Professor Dippet who stood at the door. Many looked mistrustingly at the balding man before them, but Minerva waved, and the Professor waved back. Catherine, who was on terms with the Professor through Minerva, smiled shyly.

"Students," the Professor's voice rose above the whispers and plotting, and the use of the word 'students' assured some that they would be accepted, "please follow me." The Professor led them through a magnificent Entrance Hall, complete with long marble staircase, and into an even more magnificent Great Hall. Four long tables, each holding older students already, ended at what was presumably the staff table. Minerva noted the empty seat in the center where the Headmaster, Professor Dippet, would sit. After she had taken her fill of the people in the room, she looked up at the ceiling, which she believed to be shrouded in darkness until she saw the moon and realized that it was the starless night sky she saw and remembered what Professor Dippet had told her about it – it wasn't really open to the sky but showed it.

Professor Dippet led them up to stand in a line before the staff table. Several of Minerva's new classmates fidgeted nervously, but Minerva herself was composed, on the outside, at least. Inside her, though, raged one large conflict, all hinging on her Sorting. Her parents had had a row about it last week – her father had hinted that she would be in Ravenclaw, like him, which her mother had taken offense at, being in Gryffindor. They had argued back and forth for a few minutes until her mother had hissed something like, "Prophecy," under her breath, and her father had instantly conceded. But Minerva had no idea what that meant.

When she refocused on the Great Hall, she became aware that Professor Dippet had placed a frayed, battered hat on a stool before them and had begun to call the names of the soon to be First Years. "Adams, Edward… Brighton, Jean…" Professor Dippet was reading off of a list of names as the hat shouted the name of the house each student now belonged to, which Minerva knew about thanks to her parents.

Events got tense when the Professor reached the Es. Finally, "Elderidge, Catherine," was called. Minerva clenched an unclenched her hands in her skirt as the hat sat on Catherine's head for a seemingly interminable amount of time. As Minerva released, smoothed, and re-gathered her skirt in her hands, the hat shouted "GRYFFINDOR!" The knot in Minerva's stomach lessened a bit more. She was decided. She wanted to be in Gryffindor. But would the hat let her? She didn't know how that worked.

"… McGonagall, Minerva…" Minerva stepped forward, taking deep, calming breaths as she sat on the stool and placed the hat on her head. The world went dark as the hat blocked out the light of the Great Hall.

"Interesting…" a voice inside the hat commented, "very interesting. Your mind, young lady, is a very conflicted place. You want to please your father, to be in Ravenclaw, and to have your intelligence be known. But you also want to make your mother happy, to be with your friend, to be brave like you've never been so far. In other words, to be in Gryffindor. There is the prophecy," Minerva's brain tucked that into the corner of her mind, "which implies that you are braver than you think. But I will not solve your inner conflict for you – you must do that yourself. So, I ask you, what do you want?" Minerva's inner conflict surged up again. It raged. She felt helpless. But no, it wouldn't be like that. She wouldn't let it. She would decide her own future. As she opened her mouth to whisper her answer, the hat spoke. "You have just proved yourself worthy of your choice by deciding it for yourself. Your determination places you where you want to be. GRYFFINDOR!"

Minerva raised the hat off of her head to see Professor Dippet smiling and applauding. She smiled and placed the hat on the stool as "Nelson, George," was called up. She slid into a seat at the long table next to Catherine. As she took deep breaths to calm herself, realizing that she was safe and where she wanted to be, they watched as "Nelson, George" became a Hufflepuff. Minerva noticed that the two girls who had crossed the lake with them still stood before the staff table. But as "Prewett, Evelyne" was called, the girl with curly brunette hair stepped forward and placed the hat on her head. The hat took little time deliberating, and soon Evelyne slid into a seat across from Catherine. About a minute later, the blond girl, "Taylor, Marie," joined them. As they smiled at one another in introduction, Headmaster Dippet stood up. "I am glad to see another year of students," clearly, there could be no doubt about their belonging here now, "and I hope you will all apply yourselves here. You will blossom and grow here, and some of you, I know, will be truly great." Minerva blushed as she felt the Headmaster's eyes on her. She didn't know how true it would be.