I stand at the edge of the meadow, head back, inhaling deeply. The yellow flowers give off the sweetest scent, a thing that reminds me of a better time. I kneel down, picking a single flower and examining it in my hand. Its petals contained the most vibrant yellow, a colour I am yet to master. Not too bright, not too dull. One would say, perfect. My gaze falls past the flower, down to the ground, where I press my hands firmly into the earth. This here, was district 12. Down there, under this sea of yellow, lays the hundreds of innocents who were not lucky enough to escape the fire. My friends, family, anyone I'd ever cared about, gone. Buried under this layer of dirt. I feel a slight pang in the back of my brain, hot and all too familiar. I find myself starting to tremble.
Katniss killed these people, started the rebellion, caused the fire. She brought this onto them! Images of screaming children burning to death, skin red and raw. People fleeing the district. Panicked looks, searching for their families. Screams and gurgled cries when they find the bodies. My family, trapped inside the bakery. I can see it now, them huddled in the bathroom, clinging on to each other for dear life, literally burning to death.
All the while, Katniss sits in 13 turning a blind eye, locking herself away. That stinking mutt! That coward! She should be one whose dead, not my family.
My eyes fly open and I can feel the remains of the Tracker-Jacker venom coursing through my veins. "It's not real. Not her, she's not a mutt. She's your wife, your beautiful wife." I murmur, reassuring myself that it was just the venom talking. Clumps of dirt and flowers are solid in my hands and I relax, letting the crushed blossoms fall back down to the ground.
In times where I lost control, I just had to hold on and fight through it. I'd always be fine in the end, Katniss had learned to steer clear when I had the rare occasion. Although it had been happening a lot lately. I put it down to the fact that Katniss isn't here. That I need her to stay by in for me to keep my sanity. Without her, I was loosing it myself.
Maybe that's what it would take for us to be together in the end?
Forget the Star-crossed lovers from District 12.
The deranged-lost lovers from district 12.
