Original disclaimer posted on Chapter One...

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Book 1, Chapter 4: The Warriors of Kyoshi :: Aang Tries to Impress Katara With the Air Marbles

Aang: Momo, marbles please.

(Momo finds and gives the marbles to Aang.)

Aang: Hey Katara! Check out this airbending trick!

(Aang does the trick; the marbles spin rapidly in a circle in between his hands.)

Katara: (absentmindedly) That's great, Aang.

Aang: (crushed) You didn't even look.

Katara: That's great!

Aang: But I'm not doing it now.

Katara: Okay.

Aang: (convincingly) Katara! Look out! There's a wolfbat on your head!

Katara: Sounds good. (continues sewing)

Aang: HEY KATARA!!

Katara: Okay.

Aang: So... I can say anything I want and you won't even listen, will you?

Katara: That's nice.

Aang: Wow, this will be fun.

Katara: Okay.

Aang: Katara, you look awfully fat in that coat.

Katara: That's great.

Aang: Katara's a moron... and likes it!

Katara: (sewing)

Aang: Katara is the worst waterbender ever!

Katara: (still sewing)

Aang: Katara eats twice her weight every day!

Katara: (still sewing)

Aang: Hey, your hair looks like a honey bun with two onion rings attached to it. Gross, it even smells like it, too!

Katara: (stops sewing, looks monstrous) You did NOT just talk about my hair...

Book 1, Chapter 3: The Southern Air Temple :: Iroh Gets A Little Too Startled As Zuko and Zhao Discuss About His Search For the Avatar

Zhao: And by year's end, the Earth Kingdom capital will be under our rule. The Fire Lord will finally claim victory in this war.

Zuko: If my father thinks the rest of the world will follow him willingly, then he is a fool.

Zhao: Two years at sea have done little to temper your tongue. So, how is your search for the Avatar going?

Iroh: (tips over the stand of weapons he has been examining . There is a huge mess)(embarrassed) My fault entirely.

Zuko: We haven't found him yet.

Zhao: Did you really expect to? The Avatar died a hundred years ago--along with the rest of the airbenders.

Iroh: (stumbles and falls towards the war map, thus tearing it down to the ground) Oops!

Zhao: (furious) Anyway, it would be impossible to find the Avatar... unless you found some evidence that the Avatar is alive.

Iroh: (trips over his own foot and accidentally kicks over the tea stand, spilling all of the tea) My bad!

Zuko: No. Nothing.

Iroh: (twitches and punches Zhao in the stomach) Oops!

Zhao: (in pain) What the hell is wrong with you, Iroh!

Zuko: I haven't found anything. It's like you said. The Avatar probably died a long time ago.

Iroh: (unintentionally starts beating up Zhao)

Zhao: What the fu-(gets punched in the face) Stop it, you assh-(gets punched numerous times in the gut and passes out)

Book 1, Chapter 6: Imprisoned :: Katara and Haru's Father, Kyro, Discuss the Escape Plan

Prisoner: Tyro, the prisoners are complaining there aren't enough blankets to go around.

Tyro: I'll talk to the guards. In the meantime, make sure the elderly are taken care of. The rest of us will simply have to hope for warmer weather.

Katara: If you don't mind me asking, what's your escape plan?

Tyro: Excuse me?

Katara: You know, the plan to get everyone off the rig? What is it? Mutiny? Sabotage?

Tyro: Excuse me?

Katara: How are you going to escape this horrid place? Stealth? Resistance forces?

Tyro: Excuse me?

Katara: Uh... I don't know how to make it clearer than that.

Tyro: Sorry. Oh, we need help thinking of an escape plan.

Katara: ...Are you serious? I just asked multiple times what the plan was.

Tyro: We are planning to use mutiny, sabotage, stealth, or even resistance forces, if it gets really desperate.

Katara: Uh...

Tyro: I don't know how to make it clearer than that...

Book 1, Chapter 12: The Storm :: Aang and Katara Need to Go to the Market to Get Some Food

Aang: Look at those clear skies, buddy! Should be some smooth flying.

Katara: Well, we better smoothly fly ourselves to a market, cause we're out of food.

Sokka: Guys, wait, this was in my dream, we shouldn't go to the market.

Katara: What happened in your dream?

Sokka: Food eats people! (pause) And, Momo could talk. He said some very unkind things.

Aang: Sokka, stop messing around.

Sokka: I'm serious! It was so vivid.

Katara: I think you're just really hungry. We'll go get some food. Come on Momo!

Momo: (goes to Sokka) Next time you talk about me negatively, I'll take off your head and roll it down a cave.

Book 1, Chapter 16: The Deserter :: Aang Begs Jeong Jeong to Teach Him How to Firebend

Jeong Jeong: Get out.

Aang: Master, I need to learn firebending.

Jeong Jeong: Only a fool seeks his own destruction.

Aang: I'm the Avatar. It's my destiny to...

Jeong Jeong: Destiny? What would a boy know of destiny? If a fish lives its whole life in this river, does he know the river's destiny? No! Only that it runs on and on out of his control! He may follow where it flows, but he cannot see the end. He cannot imagine the ocean

Aang: Unless he's explored it already...
Jeong Jeong: To master the bending disciplines, you must first master discipline itself.

Aang: ... Doesn't fire teach discipline?

Jeong Jeong: But you have no interest in this, so I have no interest in you! Now, get out.

Aang: Maybe you should teach me how to firebend before I force a tornado to touchdown on your head.

Jeong Jeong: Are you deaf!

Aang: I just responded to all of your rebutles! You're the one who's deaf.

Jeong Jeong: How can I teach you if you refuse to listen?

Aang: Okay, Jeong Jeong, you're starting to piss me off.

Jeong Jeong: Water is cool and soothing, earth is steady and stable, but fire, fire is alive! It breathes, it grows, without a bender, a rock will not throw itself! But fire will spread and destroy everything in its path if one does not have the will to control it! That is its destiny! You are not ready! You are too weak!

Aang: Yo mamma weak...

Jeong Jeong: What?!

Aang: Yo mamma's so fat that the great wall of Ba Sing Se uses her for shade!

Jeong Jeong: Yo mamma's so fat that she takes a step from island to island to get to the landmass of the fire nation!

Aang: Yo mamma's so ugly that Ozai made her the fire lord just so the shadow would cover her face up!

Jeong Jeong: Yo mamma's so fat that she had mistaken the Southern Air Temple as an ice cream cone!

Aang: Yo mamma's so fat that she took the Northern Water Tribe as an ice cube!

Jeong Jeong: Yo mamma's so stupid that she thought Earth, Wind, and Fire was a musical group!

Aang: Yo ma-- wait a minute...

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[A/N: Ha ha, I was on a roll on the last sketch...