The Mirror Image Iterations Chapter 3

I.

"So you each got $20,000 from Wil Wheaton?" Leonard asked.

Raj and Howard nodded. "And signed a contract, saying we provided the idea to Wil but he was the one who turned it into reality. But if the show is made into a series, we'll get 5% of the profits. 5%!"

"That's not actually bad," said Leonard, "Considering how much TV shows make these days. 5% of a million dollars is…"

"$50,000," said Sheldon immediately. "Not that much when you think about it," he said dismissively.

"Each," pointed out Raj.

"Oh, wait," said Sheldon suddenly. "What do you mean, if the show is made into a series? Penny said that it was a series."

"She was probably just excited," Howard said with a wave of his hand. "We all know how it is. First they have to make a pilot, and if the pilot is popular, then they make the series."

"And if the pilot is not popular," said Raj, suddenly concerned, "They don't make the series. Or they recast the actors and rewrite it and try again."

"Oh, no," said Sheldon. "What if Penny turns out to be John Hoyt instead of DeForest Kelly? Or Jeffrey Hunter instead of William Shatner?"

"Or Meg Foster instead of Sharon Gless," said Raj. "Or Genevieve Bujold instead of Kate Mulgrew?"

"Well, we have to make sure that doesn't happen!" declared Leonard.

They sat staring at each other, and then they heard it. There was a howl from Penny's apartment. Not the howl of a wolf, seeking its mate, but the howl of utter despair.

As one, they rushed across the hallway.

She stood in the center of the room, clutching a script. (They had all seen scripts before – scripts form Star Trek, Kung Fu….any show you could name were often auctioned on Ebay.) She stared at them, "like a deer looking into headlights," Sheldon would describe it later.

"Penny, what's the matter?" demanded Leonard.

"A messenger just dropped off the script, for the role I'm supposed to play. It's a show called The Steady State Theory. I just looked at it and…and…oh, Leonard…" she dropped the script and walked into Leonard's arms.

Howard pounced on it. Raj and Sheldon gathered round as he paged through it. The front page had the list of the actors and the parts they were to play – Penny was to play Agatha Parker. They hurried to find her first scene, which took place in a laboratory….then raised their heads to stare silently at Penny's back. Over her shoulder, Leonard looked at them. Solemnly, they returned his gaze, shaking their heads funerally.

"Penny, Penny," said Leonard comfortingly. "It's all right. So you've got a lot of complex dialog. You've also got four physicists who can help you understand it."

"Well, I wouldn't go that far," murmured Sheldon. "But we can certainly help you pronounce it."

II.

While Penny fortified herself by shopping for shoes online, Raj, Howard and Leonard read the script. Sheldon had been banished back to his own apartment – he was a very fast reader and had been driving the other three crazy by insisting that they turn the pages at his pace.

As Raj, Howard and Leonard read, they exchanged glances. Yes….these characters were very familiar, for all that they were women.

There was Henrietta Monroe, a super-intelligent woman who had gone to college when she was 11. She had difficulty in relating to others, was uninterested in men, and expected everyone to arrange their lives for her convenience.

Agatha Parker was the "normal" one – apart from the fact that she was very intelligent – she wanted a regular relationship with a man, but was too shy to approach anyone, in particular the handsome male would-be actor who had just moved in next door. She was the "peace-maker" among the group….the voice of reason.

Then there was Tomoe Terao, from Japan. Although she longed for a relationship, she had great difficulty speaking with men…indeed, she became mute in front of them.

And finally there was Helen Faraday, an over-sexed, predatory woman who was always chasing guys, and because she was very beautiful she always got them. But because of her tremendous intelligence, they never stuck around the next morning.

When Howard had grasped exactly how his "mirror image" was being portrayed, he threw up his hands. "What the frak is this? I try those lines and never get anywhere! And she gets everybody?"

"Well, think about it," said Raj. "Women can pick and choose who they go out with, they won't take just anybody. But if you were approached by a beautiful woman asking if you wanted to go to bed, wouldn't you jump at the chance?"

"Point taken," Howard admitted reluctantly. "God, women have it so easy."

"So, to summarize," said Leonard, "Penny is playing Agatha Parker, the "normal" one of the group. Kamiko Musashi, a newcomer actress, a Hawaiian of Japanese descent, is playing Tomoe Terao. Henrietta Monroe is being played by Katherine Hayes… I think I've seen her in something…she looks like Katherine Hepburn, doesn't she?"

The other two nodded.

"And finally, Helen Faraday is being played by Debbie Kendrick. Never heard of her, either."

"This is very bad," said Raj. "I mean, the plot is very good, but these actresses. Who are they? All newcomers. Except this Katherine Hayes. What is needed is established stars, like Bea Arthur, Rue McClanahan and Betty White."

"Yes, 40 years ago Rue McClanahan would have made a great Helen Faraday. And Betty White could have played the normal one, Agatha Parker. And Bea Arthur could have played Henrietta Monroe. But what actresses are there in their 20s today that can take on these roles? Nobody!"

"Hey, what about Summer Glau?" demanded Howard. "She'd be great in the Henrietta Monroe part. Just great. She'd terminate everybody."

Raj and Leonard exchanged grins.

Then Leonard said: "Okay, you guys. Let's get to work. I'll go next door and make copies of all the sheets with Penny's dialog on them (his printer also served as a fax, copy machine and scanner), and then we'll come back and help her go over the dialog."

Raj looked up. "I'd better go borrow a beer from Penny's refrigerator."

"Right," said Leonard, heading for the door. "The Impossible Missions Force is on the job."

"He, I heard that," called Penny.