Authors Note:
Thanks for the reviews guys, they're awesome! So this is the second flashback of Rose and Emmett which takes place quite a lengthy time after the first flashback.
This has probably been my most favourite scene to write ever, a lot of research and thought went into it because I had to find the perfect scene. (You'll figure out what I mean soon.)
Enjoy!
Flashback
I walk into Drama class with Steph behind me and sit at my usual seat. I don't look at him once. I've had enough of seeing his evil glares full of hatred. It's become common knowledge that he doesn't like me, nobody (including me) knows why, but no-one questions it. No-one questions anything to do with me.
I wonder, just like they do, why everytime we speak we come to blows. It's not even as if I go into it telling myself I'll start an argument, it just tends to happen. I've tried to be nice to him, I've tried being nice around him but he doesn't seem to care. He still treats me as if I'm a disease and avoids me like I'm the plague.
"Right, I'm sure you'll all be excited to know that the computers are down. Something to do with maintenance, they're fixing it as soon as they can though. This means I've had to improvise todays lesson." Ms Hart says before turning to write the words partner and improv on the board.
Whispers scatter throughout the room as everyone looks toward their best friend with an excited look.
"Settle down. I'm choosing the pairings, there's no need to get so excited." She says with a devious smile on her face.
Everyone groans at her words, worried they'll be paired with someone horrid.
All that runs through my mind is 'please not him, please not him'. Anyone but him.
"So with your partners you'll be picking out an iconic film scene from my magic hat and then you'll perform it to the rest of the class. Oh stop it, it'll be fun!" She promises us as the groans worsen. "I've put you together at random."
"Abbie, you're with Drew. Holly, you're with Ethan. Rosalie you're with Bradley. Emmett you're-" "Bradley's not here miss, he's ill." Someone shouts out loud.
"Well Rosalie you're with Emmett then."
The classroom quietens as all eyes fall on either me or Emmett. Miss Hart carries on throwing out names together but no-one focuses on her.
I keep my head down not wanting to look up because if I do, everyone will be able to see the dread across my face.
How could this be happening? Why was it happening?
No, instead I'd have to speak to him and perform a scene with him infront of my entire Drama class, while each of them stare at us knowing he hates me.
"Right, now for the sce- what is it Emmett?"
"Any chance I can switch partners?"
Is he fucking serious? I don't bother looking towards my left where I can hear his voice because I'll probably end up strangling him on the spot.
He tends to do that to me, he makes me want to strangle him one second and then kiss him the next. But no-one knows I secretly pine after him, no-one knows that I crush on him, that I find myself thinking about him when I'm alone.
If people knew they'd just end up asking questions and laugh at me.
'Why do you like a guy who treats you like shit?' 'Why do you like a guy who openly flirts with every girl at school but when it comes to you, he becomes a monk?' 'You guys have spoken like three times, how can you like him?'
They're all valid questions but I wouldn't know how to answer any of them.
Why do I like a guy who treats me like shit? Why am I striving to break down this facade I've took years to build just so he can like me, or even send me a signal of approval? How can I like him when everytime we've spoken, an argument has followed?
The first time we met he'd called me out on all my shit and basically said he didn't like me. The second time was here in Drama class. We had a supply because Miss Hart was busy giving birth and because it was unexpected, we had to improvise the lesson.
She decided on us all sitting in a big circle and said for us to ask any student a question and then for them to act out the answer. When it came to Emmetts turn, he looked straight at me and my heart sped up.
My mind ran at a hundred miles an hour because he was finally looking at me. He was finally giving me the attention I wanted off him. (I know, it sounds stupid, but it was just the way I felt.)
But then he opened his mouth and asked 'why do you treat everyone like shit?' I was speechless to say the least, just like the rest of the class. Stephanie had looked shocked but she admitted to me after, that it just made him seem hotter because he was so daring. I argued and said he's an 'egotistical jerk who gets off on bullying others' but I agreed inside.
I agreed because even though he was mean to me, I had witnessed him being nice to others and that's the guy I was crushing on. It wasn't the side of Emmett I got to see personally, it was the side he showed everyone else.
The third time was the reason I always found myself making excuses for his rude behaviour towards me.
"No. Partners are final. Abbie get up here and pick a scene out of the hat."
I feel my face burn as it turns red. I can see that everyone wants to laugh but they don't dare go through with it. I can tell they're probably all as anxious as I am about how this will turn out.
I lift my head higher, refusing to be the weak girl I used to be. I'm Rosalie fucking Swan, I will not be mocked. Not anymore.
"Rosalie, your turn."
I get up even though my legs feel like jelly and make my way towards the front of the class, hoping with all my might that we get a comedic scene or some sort of friendship scene.
I put my hand into Ms Harts magic hat and dig deep. I pull out a scroll of paper and the words 'Alyssa and Holden declaration of love scene from Chasing Amy' are written on it.
My heart drops and I freeze up. I'm a hopeless romantic at heart so I've seen every romantic movie out there. This one just so happens to be one of my favourites and so I know exactly what scene this is already.
"Well, what scene is it?" Miss Hart probes.
"E-erm, the declaration of love scene from Chasing Amy with Alyssa and Holden."
I hear a few giggles and a few intakes of breath, but I don't look towards the sea of students and I definitely don't look anywhere near his direction.
He probably thinks he's got the worse end of the stick being as he shows obvious distaste towards me, but I'm the one who has to pretend it doesn't all affect me.
I go to sit back down and think of a million excuses to use to maybe get out of this situation, even though I know they'll never work. Ms Hart is the strictest teacher here at Parkins, there's no way I'm getting out of this.
Once everyone has their scenes, Ms Hart gives us the rules. We're not allowed to run through the scene, it has to be in the moment, but we are allowed to learn our lines and speak with our partners on how we want to play it out.
"Also this is a drama class so I want everything to be as close to the original scene as possible. You'll be glad to know I'm permitting the cussing, just for today. I'm also allowing the kissing. Remember though, this is all about working with your partner to improvise, if you mess up a line, think fast but think hard. Work together, play off eachothers weaknesses and strengths."
There's a few excited voices as people get ready to rinse the swearing allowed rule she's set for today, and the guys whoop as this means they get no strings attached kissing.
"Off you go. You have ten minutes, and no run throughs."
Everyone gets up to go to their partners and I turn to find mines expecting him to be walking upto me but he's as still as ever. I wait a few seconds longer but it doesn't seem as if he's getting up, so I walk over to him.
Did I mention he's stubborn?
I sit beside him, hating that the drama department uses double desks to save room for the stage space in the classrooms.
"Have you seen the movie?" I ask as I hand him the script Ms Hart gave me earlier.
"I have a younger sister, of course I have." His answer is so matter of fact that he makes me feel stupid for asking the question. How was I supposed to know he had a sister when we weren't even friends?
He's belittled me within seconds.
"So you're familiar with the scene?" He nods at me with a tight grimace on his face, as he reads through the lines.
As usual he obviously doesn't want to speak to me.
I breathe slow as the minutes clock by and we sit there in silence, as we've both decided ignoring eachother works best. I don't bother reading through the script, I know the scene word for word. Plus I don't want to think about what happens at the end of the scene.
"So we'll sit down beside eachother for the car scene, you get up, go behind stage, I'll follow and then we'll walk out across stage together and then go opposite ways, and then-"
"Yeah, yeah that's fine." I say quickly, not wanting him to say the words out loud.
"Ok class, time's up. Abbie and Drew, get up on stage."
I look towards the clock and wish that there's only ten minutes left of the lesson, sadly there's half an hour till lesson finishes. So unless there's some sort of miracle, we'll be performing today.
I don't bother focusing on the acts before mine, frankly even if I tried I don't think I could.
How am I going to get through this? I'm not even a good actress. Not that much acting would be required.
"Emmett, Rosalie. You're up."
We both get up and walk on stage. The tension in the room becomes thick as everyone perks up a little, eager to see us in this scene together.
Emmett grabs two chairs from the back of the stage and places them side by side. I sit on one, and he's on the other.
I wipe the sweat off my hands and count to ten in my head.
You can do this. It's just acting. Pretend it's just you and Emmett.
"3.. 2.. 1, go."
I wait a few seconds and then I'm Alyssa, acting out a scene with my Holden.
"Why are we stopping?" I say facing forward before looking towards him.
"Because I can't take it." He says, his eyes on me.
"Can't take what?" My breath hitches as I wait for the words to come.
"I love you." It's weird hearing him say it to me, and even though this is acting, they affect me the same way as if they were said in any other situation.
"You love me?"
"I love you. And not in a friendly way, although I think we're great friends. And not in a misplaced affection, puppy-dog way, although I'm sure that's what you'll call it. And it's not because you're unobtainable."
His words hit a cord as I recall him saying that to me the first time we met. Suddenly I feel like I'm Alyssa. I get just why she reacts the way she does for the rest of the scene.
"I love you. Very simple, very truly. You're the epitome of every attribute and quality I've ever looked for in another person. I know you think of me as just a friend and crossing that line is the furthest thing from an option you'd ever consider. But I can't do this any longer."
The pain in his voice is visible. It's so good that I can't help but fall under his trap. Just like every other girl has over this past year he's been here. I feel my nose itch and my eyes burn, watching this scene brought tears to my eyes, so playing it out with him of all people will probably turn me into a wreck.
"I can't stand next to you without wanting to hold you. I can't look into your eyes without feeling that longing you only read about in trashy romance novels. I can't talk to you without wanting to express my love for everything you are. I know this will probably queer our friendship - no pun intended - but I had to say it, because I've never felt this before."
He misses out a few lines but you can't tell, plus it doesn't affect his performance, he's still smashing every line he gets right. I find myself wishing all of this was happening in a different situation. That one day, Emmett expressed his undying love for me, but this is the closest thing I'll ever get from him.
"But I couldn't allow another day to go by without getting it out there, regardless of the outcome, which by the look on your face is to be the inevitable shoot-down. And I'll accept that. But I know some part of you is hesitating for a moment, and if there is a moment of hesitation, that means you feel something too."
My cheeks feel damp and I bring my hand up to my face and realise I'm crying. I look out to the rest of the classroom but no-ones moving. They're all enraptured by his performance, sucked in, believing every word, just like I am.
"There isn't another soul on this fucking planet who's ever made me the person I am when I'm with you, and I would risk this friendship for the chance to take it to the next level. Because it's there between you and me. You can't deny that. And even if we never speak again after tonight, please know that I'm forever changed because of you and what you've meant to me."
I feel my heart aching inside. I didn't ever get where the word heartbreak stemmed from, but now I do. Now I get it all too much.
I get up and walk off stage as Emmett speaks his next line to the crowd.
"Was it something I said?"
I've never really understood why Alyssa got out of the car, Holden just gave her the best speech known to mankind and she just walks away, but I understand it now. I understand just why she has to walk away.
Because it's too painful to stay. It's too heartbreaking knowing that their situation will never work. It's doomed to fail. She's gay and he's straight.
I like him. He hates me.
Emmett walks off stage and towards me and for a second I see the worry across his face when he sees my tears, but then I realise this is all an act, literally.
I walk on stage backwards with my thumb out towards the students.
"What are you doing?" He asks me. I'm grateful that right now I don't really need to be looking at him because I know if I do, the last part of my heart will break.
All of this is becoming way too close for comfort, it's all way too realistic. Except I'm Holden. I'm the one pining, and he's Alyssaa, the one who doesn't even realise.
"Get back in the car and get out of here."
Please just go. Just run out of the classroom. I can't do this any more.
"You're going to hitch to New York?"
I nod at him even though I'm supposed to say yes out loud. At the moment I can't bring myself to speak.
"Aren't you at least going to comment?"
Stop doing this to me. Stop making this all seem real. Stop fucking with my head!
"Here's my comment, fuck you."
"Why?" He asks.
Because I'm falling in love with you, I want to shout at him.
"That was so unfair. You know how unfair that was." Do you know how unfair you're being Emmett?
"It's unfair that I'm in love with you?
No it's unfair that I'm falling in love with you and you don't even care for me in the slightest. It's unfair that I'm the type of person who wouldn't be accepted, so instead I have to pretend to be someone else. It's unfair that you didn't even give me a chance to be myself, you judged me within seconds, just like everyone else.
"No, it's unfortunate that you're in love with me. It's unfair that youfelt the fucking need to unburden your soul about it." I take a step closer to him and hit him right in the chest. This bit doesn't happen in the movie, at least not yet. But right now I'm in the moment, I'm improvising. I'm not being Alyssa. I'm being me. "Do you remember for a fucking second who I am?"
I don't care that the whole classroom probably thinks this is real to an extent, or that the whole school will know by lunch because this is my chance. This is my chance to scream and shout and hit him.
"So? People change."
"Oh, it's that simple? You fall in love with me and want a romantic relationship, nothing changes for you with the exception of feeling hunky-dorey all the time. But what about me? It's not that simple, is it? I can't just get into a relationship with you without throwing my whole fucking world into upheaval!"
But I want to, I want to be the kind of girl you could love. The kind of girl you'd be proud of. Not the one I'm now. But you make me want to so bad.
"But that's every relationship! You just have to take the risk."
I realise he's changed the last line, so I think on my feet as I scream the words towards him.
"Risk?!" I hit him again, harder and it feels so good. "THERE'S NO 'RISK' HOLDEN! I'M FUCKING GAY! THAT'S WHO I AM! AND YOU ASSUME I CAN TURN THAT AROUND JUST BECAUSE YOU'VE GOT A CRUSH?!"
"If this is a crush... then I don't know if I could take the real thing if it ever happens."
It's his line but I feel as if he's pulled it right out of my mouth. Word for word.
According to the movie scene the tears should have stopped by now, in fact they never should have been as crazy as they were, but I can't stop crying. I can't stop the sadness spreading inside of me.
"Please, just go." I whisper, not knowing if this is still us acting or something more.
I turn and get ready to walk off stage, wondering if I can just stop it there and leave the last part out. Would anyone notice? Maybe I can say I didn't think that part was mandatory to the scene.
I try and shake off my tears as I take my first step away from him but I'm pulled back around and his mouth is on mine.
It's hard, hot and extremely passionate. I grab onto his hair and pull him closer, trying to lift myself up off the ground as much as I can, to try and meet his six foot two self.
There's no catcalls or whoops like there was for the other kisses everybody had seen today. This time there's just pure silence.
So I block everything out and kiss him just like Alyssa kissed Holden. After all this is just acting right?
We pull apart and I look down at my shoes and wipe at my cheeks. I brush my lips slightly but I don't feel it, they've gone numb.
A steady clap starts as Ms Hart smacks her hands together. The rest of the class are silent though, all of them staring at us wondering what the fuck just happened.
I know why it is they're confused.
The scene in the movie didn't end exactly like that. I was supposed to walk away, I was supposed to walk off and then run back towards him and kiss him.
Instead I got pulled back and was kissed by him.
"Bravo! You two should definitely consider joining the Drama club. That little twist at the end with Emmett kissing you instead Rosalie, was clever. Excellent way to spice the scene up."
Slowly the rest of the class start clapping along with Ms Hart as they slowly start to believe it was all planned.
The bell rings seconds after and I walk as fast as I can off stage and out the room. I don't look back at him and I don't look at anyone else.
I'm Rosalie Swan and Rosalie Swan doesn't fall in love so easily. She doesn't. At least not the Rosalie I showed to everyone else.
Authors Note:
What do you think? Did I use the correct scene or do you guys have any suggestions as to what would have worked better? If so, let me know.
Don't forget to review, I'd love to get upto 20 reviews, you may just get the next chapter if I do!
Thanks for reading. X
