Before and After 102
Oh San Diego
Three weeks it's been since I've been out here at my Aunt Meg's place. She never mentioned that her stepdaughter Kumiko lived here with her. I always thought Kumiko lived in Japan with her father. Having another girl my age and in my same situation made things a little easier. She had her boyfriend back home was well… but he was all the way in Japan.
Today was a normal day at work. First thing make coffee, go get doughnuts, and then go around refilling coffee, more doughnuts. Next I would get a minute to sit in on a call or even go to a meeting where they discussed new software or the next upcoming operating systems. On Thursday nights all the interns were required to go to a night class. Well it shouldn't really be called a class since there were no grades or no real assignments, but it was literally teaching us everything we needed to know about building software for computers and all the troubleshooting behind it.
In the evenings the interns went around filling papers, shredding papers and if we were lucky we may get to take over someone's spot during the shift change where the morning workers left and the evening workers arrived.
After six o'clock we were finally able to go home. Kumiko and I road in a cab together every night out to dinner and then home or to Aunt Meg's. My feet always hurt so terribly. It didn't even matter if I wore flats or heels my feet would ache by the end of the day. I kicked off my shoes by the door and ran upstairs to the room I shared with Kumiko and plopped down on the bed. I dug out my cell phone to see that I had missed a call from a strange number. I shrugged it off assuming it must have been someone who dialed the wrong number. I scrolled down to Vincent's name and pressed the call button. I rolled over on my back and stared up at the ceiling while I waited for him to answer. I pulled the clip that was digging into the back of my head as I lay, out of my hair and sat it on the table beside my bed.
"Hello…" Vincent always sounded so down when I talked to him. It hurt me to think that he was even possibly sad without me there.
"Hey sexy!" I said trying to sound cheerful even though I was really sad without him here. This experience would be so much better if he could only be here with me.
"Hey…how is everything?" he asked.
"Pretty good. I just miss you so damn much. Oh…hey there's someone else on the line, can I call you back really quickly?" I heard a beeping that indicated another call.
"Sure…" he said before hanging up.
I answered the other call. "Hello?"
"Hello…uh…is this Amaya Arai?" a male voice asked. I was a bit shocked.
"…ye…s." I answered slowly, a bit confused. The guy chuckled at my confusion.
"This is Hideki. You probably don't remember me, but uh… I just ran into your mom last week and she said I should give you a call." He said. I swallowed hard. Hideki was one of my ex boyfriends in between my on and off relationship with Trace. I broke his heart when I had to confess to him that I was still in love with Trace and I could no longer see him.
"Uh… oh, of course she would… My mother is always trying to set me up with people, but actually I..." I don't know what made me hesitate to say that I was taken, but in those seconds of silence Hideki cut back in.
"The reason why I wanted to give you a call is that I'm going transferring to a college out there and it would be nice to meet up and hang out with someone I know. You know, there's nothing scarier than moving to a new place and feeling totally alone."
The kind Amaya that could never say no instantly chimed in. "Oh, of course. When are you coming?"
"Next week." He answered. Something seemed a bit weird about the whole situation, but nevertheless I agreed to meet up with him when he got here. He didn't say anything that sounded like he wanted to hang out as more than anything but friends so I didn't feel like it would be wrong. We talked a while longer about simple stuff like how our families had been and our career plans for the future. I glanced over at the clock and realized that we had been chatting for over an hour.
"Oh! I'm sorry to cut you off, but I promised someone I'd call them back after I answered the phone to you." I said.
"Oh, ok. Well, see you next week." He said.
"Alright, bye." I hung up with him and quickly dialed Vincent's number. It rang and rang but he never answered. I called him three more times and he didn't answer. I prayed he wasn't angry at me.
∞∞
Next week was here quicker than I was ready for it and I found myself in a taxi with none other than Hideki himself. I was shocked at how handsome he had gotten over the years and by the way he stared at me I assumed he liked what he saw as well. My stomach churned as I began to feel bad. Vincent would flip out if he knew I was going to dinner with another guy, it didn't matter what my motives were he would be mad.
Today was a Saturday so I didn't have to go to work today or tomorrow. After dinner with Hideki, I was supposed to meet up with Kumiko at a club downtown. Aunt Meg had a new man she was seeing and he was taking her to a jazz concert Palm Springs and they wouldn't be back until tomorrow evening.
The restaurant Hideki took me too was very classy and the menu was ridiculously expensive. I looked around at the plates coming in for other tables and the portions of food were so tiny! As I scanned the menu looking for something I could try to choke down my phone rang loudly in my purse. I quickly answered it.
"Hello?"
"Amaya… is everything ok?" Oh right, it was Saturday and I hadn't called Vincent yet. He knew I didn't work on the weekends and at the very least expected a call from me on each of these days if I couldn't talk to him through the week.
"Yes, everything's fine. I'm sorry I didn't call you earlier. Kumiko and I have been hanging out all day and we're going to a club later."
"Amaya…" Vincent said with a tone I understood meant that I better not do anything stupid.
"I know I know. I'll be a good girl." I said smiling as I looked down at the table.
"You had better be." He warned. I continued smiling. Even though I hated when Vincent switched over into that fatherly mode, he still made me smile.
"I will."
"I'll let you go then…" he said with a sigh.
"Ok." I looked away and spoke in a quieter voice. "I love you."
"Goodbye, Amaya." He said hanging up on me without returning the words. I tried to believe that was just him being him, but I needed to hear him say it more often. Anyways, I looked up at Hideki hoping what I was about to say wouldn't hurt his feelings.
"That was my boyfriend, Vincent… If you've talked enough with my mom you'll know she is not happy that I'm with him." I sighed as I looked down at my menu, afraid to look the poor guy in the face. I jumped slightly as I felt him touch my hand with his.
"Does he make you happy?" he asked looking me dead in my eyes. I nodded quickly. "Do you love him?"
"With all my heart." My voice quivered slightly with emotion. Hideki took his hands off mine and leaned back in his chair.
"Then that's all that matters. Well, there's one more question… Does he mistreat you?" It felt a little weird answering these questions from Hideki, but I did it honestly.
"No, he would never intentionally mistreat me or anyone. He's a really good guy, it's just… he's been through a lot so he doesn't trust people so that's what makes him come off so cold sometimes."
A waitress came over and interrupted us as she placed a glass of water in front of both of us and took our order. I had no idea what I was getting so I just said "same" after Hideki ordered. Throughout the rest of the dinner he continued to question me about Vincent and I pretty much just ended up telling him the entire story of how we met and our relationship. I left out all the details about the demons inside him and how one of them gets completely out of control sometimes. It felt good to talk about it to someone new. He listened very intently and advised me to just wait things out with my mother and that she'd eventually come around. Dinner with Hideki was great after all and clubbing with Kumiko was even better…
The two of us stumbled into the empty condo together laughing loudly at completely nothing. "Let's drunk dial our boyfriends…"
Kumiko said once we landed on the couch together. I stopped laughing. "Vincent would kill me if I drunk dialed him. He didn't want me drinking out here…" I giggled. "I promised I'd be a good girl."
Kumiko laughed. "Yeah right…my Ryou-chan knows me better to think I'm a good girl." She stared up at the ceiling with a naughty grin on her face. She dug around in her purse for the longest time before she picked up her cell phone and called her boyfriend. I listened for awhile as she slurred sweet nothings to him.
I found myself sobering up quickly when I heard my phone ringing an hour later. It was three in the morning here so it must have been five in the Midwest. Vincent was the only person that would call me at that time so I didn't even look at the screen as I flipped it open and answered.
"Hey sexy…" I said trying to sound tired instead of drunk.
"Did you make it home alright?" Woah this was not Vincent!
"Hideki?!" I exclaimed. "Uh…yeah I'm home ok… I…thought you were my boyfriend calling."
He chuckled. "That's ok. I don't mind being called sexy." I sobered up real quick when I heard his flirtatious comment.
"Yeah…well… Vincent would fly here and destroy the whole city if he thought I called another guy sexy. Hey… I'm about to go to sleep so I'll talk to you later." I said sitting up and pulling off my high heels. My heels were so marked up from wearing uncomfortable shoes…
"Ok, sleep well." He said. I frowned at my phone as I hung it up. Did he not realize what me having a boyfriend means? He shouldn't be calling me and talking to me like that. I shook my head. I couldn't worry about it now… After I took a long shower I went to bed.
∞∞
Sundays became Vincent's and my official webcam day. We would spend up to six hours, separated by small breaks, talking to each other like this. I looked in the mirror really fast before I went to go log in. I dropped eyedrops in my eyes to take away the redness and smoothed my hair back into a low ponytail. I didn't even bother getting dressed. Doing laundry was such a hassle here because the laundry mats were always so crowded there's even at least six other people in there at all hours of the night and early morning.
Once I was satisfied with how I looked at the moment I picked up the phone and sat down at the computer. A grin spread across my face as soon as I saw Vincent sitting there in front of me. He barely smiled back.
"Hi there!" I said waving and giving him the cheesy grin I could. He rolled his eyes and his tiny smile widened a bit.
"Amaya." He nodded in response to my greeting.
"Whatcha doin?" I asked in a sing song type of voice.
"Looking at you." He said honestly. "How was your night? You look quite tired."
I nodded. "It was fun. Kumiko's a blast." I grinned thinking of the awesome club she took me to last night. The spotlight was on us for a while as we danced on tables and participated in all the body shots. I never let another guy drink anything off me, though so in that sense I was a good girl.
"Mm hmm." Vincent looked into the camera at me. He narrowed his eyes at me as he asked. "Were you sober?"
"O..of course!" I said. Not even through a web cam, could I lie to this man.
"Amaya. I'm not playing around with you. You know I am not the one to play games. When I said I didn't want you drinking out there I meant it. You don't know that place well enough to just run around letting loose doing everything you're big enough to do."
I rolled my eyes and sighed loudly. "Vincent, I'm young and I'm just trying to have fun! Relax!"
Vincent only frowned in response. He looked away and then back at the screen. "The moment I relax, something will happen to you and I'll never be able to forgive myself."
"What I do is not your problem."
"It is my problem, you're the one I love! When I fall in love with someone, I love hard." Vincent got up out of his chair and walked away, but stayed on the phone with me. It hurt me not to be able to chase him down and make him look at me when he was talking to me.
I sighed loudly. "I'm sorry."
"You're not sorry Amaya and you're only going to keep doing what you want to do. This is exactly why I should have never let you in." he said.
"Stop talking like that. There's no room for regret now, Vincent. Not after what I've done…" I said referring to the fact that I am now immortal for him.
"Your motivation for doing that mustn't have been clear. If you really loved me that much you'd listen to me." His voice was softer and by the tone he sounded a bit hurt.
Being the emotional person I am, I instantly started crying. "I do love you Vincent. But you know I can't say no to people. Kumiko, my cousin is just like another Rena. They provoke me." I sniffed and wiped my eyes.
"I don't want to hear your excuses. If that's all you have for me today then I'd rather end this conversation here." His tone and returned to its normal monotone and I could almost feel him shutting me out.
"Fine." I replied. "I guess I'll talk to you later then…"
He hung up without saying goodbye or anything and left me to lie on my bed and cry. Kumiko came into the room looking a mess in her huge grey suit pants, tiny white T-shirt and her hair up in a huge bun right on top of her head.
"What's wrong?" she asked plopping down on the bed next to me.
"Vincent's mad at me." I said through my sobs. I wasn't really crying because he was mad, but just because I was starting to feel as he if he was regretting allowing himself to fall for me and that hurt.
"Psh… don't let a man make you cry. If he makes you cry he's probably not worth it anyways. You should dump him and get with that Hideki guy. He was super hot!" she said shoving my shoulder playfully and giggling.
"No…I really love Vincent. I'm starting to feel like the decision to come out here was a big mistake." I sat up and wiped my eyes.
"Girl, if it wasn't for you worrying about him all day we'd be having a blast out here! I vote dump him." She said as she hopped off my bed and skipped off to the bathroom where I could hear her hacking up her insides. I sighed loudly and crawled back underneath my covers. There's no way I'd dump Vincent. There's no way I'd even let him dump me! And something about Hideki seems fishy…
