Atoli's POV
"Are we there yet, Atoli?" Bo asked as we went to the place where the main event will be held. "I'm so tired…" he complained.
"I know. I'm tired too." I said. "But we need to go and see the wedding."
"But why? I thought you hate Shino whenever she's with Haseo." He said. "Why do we have to see their wedding?"
I didn't answer. We just kept walking to the main event. I really want to see Haseo. If he's going to be happy, to finally smile in his wedding, I wanna see that moment to come. But something else made me want to back away, something that made me feel like it was a waste of time to go to the wedding, but I couldn't decipher what that feeling is. But that doesn't matter for now; all I wanna do is to see their wedding.
"Atoli?" Bo asked suddenly. "What's that?" he asked as he pointed his index finger at somewhere.
I glanced at him. "Where?" I asked as I tried to look at his direction. When I found out what he was pointing, my jaw dropped slightly in awe.
We were at the heart of Breg Epona, and in it were thousands of people wearing white clothes. There were several cherry blossoms surrounding the center of Breg Epona, sending small amount of silky pink petals flying through the sky by the gentle spring wind. White balloons were tied around the cherry blossoms. And, there was a huge church I never saw in Breg Epona-maybe people can only see and enter inside the unknown church whenever there is a special event, like the wedding. Whatever makes the church visible in special events, the church looked ancient yet beautiful in many ways. The church was decorated with white and pale blue tiles. Its massive door was wooden and was painted in brown, floral designs carved on it. Two large towers were separated at each sides of the church. Each of the towers had its own set of large bells, used for a certain event.
"Atoli, look!" Bo exclaimed as he tugged my sleeve, sending me back to reality. He pointed his index finger at somewhere again, this time his eyes wide open in excitement.
I glanced at his direction. My eyes widen as I realized who Bo was pointing at.
"It's big bro Haseo!" he shouted in joy, still pointing his finger at my most favorite person in the world.
Just as I thought….he IS handsome in a white tuxedo. He waved at the crowd with a smile, the kind of emotion I want to see in his face. I smiled as he walked down at the stairs of the stairs, but my smile changed into a frown when I saw somebody else followed Haseo behind; a girl with the same look as I have, but her hair was pink with a tattoo that looks like a small tear below on her left eye. She was wearing a white wedding gown, while holding a bouquet of pink flowers. She followed Haseo happily as she waved to the crowd. I narrowed my eyes at the bride. Who does she think she is, following my guy like that? I thought to myself angrily. Though I already knew she was going to marry my Haseo, it still makes me feel like I just wanna PK Shino. It was the first time I felt angry, to plot revenge on somebody I hate, and that felt…weird.
"Greetings, our dear visitors from Mac Anu, Dol Dona, and from Breg Epona." Gaspard's voice boomed out from the speakers around the streets of Breg Epona, making me forgot what I had just thought earlier. "And welcome to the grand wedding of the newly-weds, Haseo the legendary PKK a.k.a. the 'Terror of Death' and the Emperor of the three grand tournaments, and his wife-to-be the lovely Shino, to be wed here in the Breg Epona Cathedral as we celebrate their special marriage." He announced as he held the microphone. He was wearing a priest's white clothes, and he was holding a bible.
"I didn't expect you to be here, Atoli." A familiar voice said behind me. When I turned around, it was the green-clad Blade Brandier Silabus. A small smile curved on his face. "What are you doing here?" he asked.
The answer was obvious. "….I'm here to celebrate, of course." I replied bluntly.
"Really…? You want to see Haseo marry Shino? That's kinda odd for you, considering the fact that you secretly love Haseo." He said as he scratched his head. "…not that I was interfering your personal life or anything." He said with a chuckle.
"That's okay. I mean, well…now that he has Shino…I should be happy for him, right?" my sentence trailed off as I tried to fight my tears away. "Sorry, I have to go." I excused, my right hand covering my eyes from the tears or from the brilliant sunlight, and ran away.
"But the wedding is about to start!" Silabus called out.
"Atoli, wait!" Bo shouted as he followed me behind.
I ignored the two of them and continued running. To tell the truth, I don't know where I was running but I didn't care. Anywhere is good except the church. Because I was covering my eyes with both of my hands I kept bumping people, but I also didn't care. I never felt like this before. I never would have thought I could be angry, but because of what? This is a wedding. I should be happy, like Haseo was feeling right now. When I usually see weddings like Pi and Yata's wedding three months ago, I felt very happy. Everybody was happy, including Haseo. He was clapping and cheering and congratulating the newly-weds. Now Pi and Yata are very happy with each other. But now it's Haseo and Shino's wedding, shouldn't I be happy? The answer was supposedly 'yes', but if there's going to be a chance that I can change something about that, the answer is obviously; NO. Why should I give up? Haseo is mine. I've never been selfish before, but should I care? From the first time I saw Haseo, I tried my best to make him smile, to prove that I am worth for him. And I'm not going to give up that chance.
I stopped running from where I stood. I wiped my tears with the back of my hand. "Am I really that desperate to impress him?" I asked myself.
"Yeah, you are." A familiar voice said behind me.
I turned around to see Kuhn, his blue-haired ponytail swinging back and fround gracefully by the wind. "You've been invited?"
"Of course!" he answered with a cheerful smile. He placed his left hand on his chin. "Everybody is invited. Haseo and Shino invited most of the people they meet. If I'm not mistaken, they might've invited most of the people starting from Mac Anu, Dol Dona, to Breg Epona. I mean, Haseo is very famous, after all." He explained. "…speaking of which, why are you asking that question? Aren't you invited?" he asked.
What am I supposed to say besides saying to him that I wasn't actually invited? I gulped. "To be honest, I wasn't invited." I admitted.
His eyes widen. "W-wait, really? Gaspard told me that Haseo invited everybody. Why Haseo didn't invite you?" he asked.
I stared at the opposite direction. "Maybe he was busy organizing the event that he forgot to invite to their wedding"-my right eye twitched at the last word-"besides, I'm okay with that."
He examined me. "But how did you know there is a wedding, and why are your clothes torn?" he asked as he examined my torn clothes.
I stared back at him. "I know there's a wedding because Bo told me there is, and…"my sentence trailed off as I tried to think of an answer for the second question. "And…"
"And what?" he asked, tapping his foot in the ground while his arms were crossed.
My eyes drooped. "We had a fight." I finally answered.
He raised an eyebrow. "You fight with…who?"
I pursed my lips before I puckered them back. "…with Haseo. We fought with each other a few hours earlier." I confessed. I wasn't supposed to answer that, but guilt took the best of me.
"Really? I didn't expect Haseo to fight against you, but he is likely to do that to anybody, but still-I didn't expect he would do that to you!" he exclaimed. He scratched the back of his head subconsciously. "I feel sorry for you…really. Sorry to hear that, though."
"Oh it's okay, and thank you." I said. "The wedding is about to start. Are you gonna celebrate?" I asked.
"Yeah, I am! I wanna see Haseo marry Shi—" he paused when he saw that I was angry, which I thought my expression was less conspicuous-"Oooh…now I know why!" he said as he chuckled.
This time, I arched an eyebrow. "What do you mean by that?"
He laughed once more. "Are you jealous of Shino because she's with Haseo?"
I stared at him suspiciously. "No, of course not!" I lied. "What makes you t-think I'm j-jealous?" I stuttered
He placed his index finger on his chin as he stared at me suspiciously. "…Oh, really?" he said in a sarcastic voice. He turned around, "Well in that case…hmm…" he paused as he tapped his chin with his index finger, "does that mean you don't care about Haseo anymore?"
That's when a certain feeling started to swept all over me. I don't know what kind of feeling it was, or even the meaning of it. Was it guilt? Jealousy? It might be both. Or maybe more than just guilt and jealousy? I don't know what it really bothered me; all I knew was that I was speechless and immobilized right after Kuhn said the words I rather live without. Of course I care about Haseo. Why would I come all this way to the church of Breg Epona if I didn't care about him? But…is it "care" the only feeling I show to Haseo? Wasn't there anything else I felt for Haseo? More than just…care? But I already knew that feeling that is deeper than "care"; I just don't want to say it in front of my beloved Haseo. That deep feeling…it's driving me crazy! I just HAD to say that word out loud, but is today the right time? Well, it doesn't hurt to say it out loud, right? Especially if it was meant for MY Haseo.
"I love you, Haseo…"I whispered so quietly it was barely audible. But I knew I just had to say it out loud, so Haseo will hear my plea. I had to be more honest than just whispering the words. I need to shout them out.
Kuhn raised an eyebrow. "…What?"
I closed my eyes in embarrassment, my hands clenched into white-knuckled fists. The sides of my lips twitched as I forced myself to say the words.
This time, Kuhn's eyes widened. "What? What did you say?" he asked with clear curiosity in his voice.
I clenched my fists harder. "I love Haseo." I said, but I knew it wasn't loud enough. I need not only Kuhn's attention, but also everybody's attention. So I tried to exhale deeply, and it worked. I glanced up at the sky. I closed my eyes, letting myself to feel the world around me as if it was heaven. Then, I let the words slip through my lips. "I LOVE HASEO!"
Right after I said the words, I felt like I was in heaven…
When I opened my eyes, I half-expected to see Kuhn in shock. But it surprised me to see Kuhn so…happy
He blinked twice before he realized his mouth was catching flies. An energetic smile was plastered on his face. "Seriously? That's—" he paused.
I closed my eyes again, letting Kuhn say something that might embarrass me for the rest of my life. But to my surprise, that words that came out of his mouth gave me the most useful advice I've ever heard, or so I thought. I swear I could feel the stares of all the people around me.
"That's great!" he shouted. The huge crowd stared at us like we were crazy.
A woman with a face and body of a cat stared at me intently. "Hey, I know you!" she exclaimed as she pointed her index finger at me. "You're from that Moon Tree guild, right?"
A girl in a red witch dress who was with the cat woman gasped. "Yeah! That's the lady who's always with Haseo! I knew her name once…"
Now everybody was spreading rumors. A male Harvest Cleric narrowed his eyes at me as he tapped his chin with his index finger. "Are you sure? I don't think that's her. Isn't Shino the girl who's ALWAYS with Haseo?"
A male Edge Punisher slapped the back of the male Harvest Cleric's head. "No, you idiot! It's not Shino we're talking 'bout! Shino is Haseo's wife-to-be. We're talking about THAT girl." He said as he pointed his index finger at me.
Everybody stared at me like I'm the suspect. This is really driving me crazy!
I ran to the cathedral while covering my eyes so I wouldn't see the reactions of the many people in Breg Epona. Yet, there is no need for me to guess what their reactions are. I ran as fast as I could. I wouldn't even care if I have scratches and bruises from the accidental bumping from the people around me. I need to talk to Shino, to tell her to stop the wedding. That was not a want-a necessity, a need. But what for? Did she ever do something bad to me? Of course she did! She's about to marry MY Haseo, leaving me heartbroken just by thinking of Haseo marrying to another girl, especially to somebody who almost looks like me.
This time, it's personal.
