Hans von Hozel: Tommy
Disclaimers: Bill Compton belongs to Charlaine Harris. Tommy belongs to Alan Ball.
Tommy, an alligator, was making a creeping on the bayou.
"Wah, wah! Mama! Wah!" Tommy was crying for his dead momy that he kilt.
All of a sudden, Vampire-Douchebag!
The Vampire Queen, Bill hovering through teh woods. She was going fast to cockblock sexing at the house next door.
"No sexing the telepath! No sexing the telepath with a big wang!" she cries.
Tommy watche Bill's big white head.
"Marshmallow!" Tommy cries. Happy, he laugh, loving to eate mashmallow.
The Queen make a scary face, red blood tears. Then she sees Tommy.
Chompy chompy bitey bitey. Tommy bitey down on teh Queens' giant white head.
"Yeek!" she cries. "Ah'm being eaten by a warm-blooded alligator!"
Tommy bites down on the vampire douchebag's flacid neck flesh. He gases and pukes.
"No marshmallow!"
Tommy crying he goes into water. He sees for real marshmallows.
"Yummy! I loves marshmallows!"
Tommy eats the marshmallows and laughing.
AN: Again I ask: WTF is wrong with me? I toyed with kiling Tommy but I couldn't. OMG, since he offed his disgusting parents, he may just be my favorite character on True Blood.
