"Oh, well," Rhys wryly says as they peer through the hedges separating and hiding them from the zombies, "this is just great."

"There are a fair few of them, yes." Ianto frowns.

Rhys snorts. "I guess Jack has another genius scheme up his sleeve, then?"

"Rhys!" Gwen snaps from beside him. "This is hardly constructive!"

"No, Gwennie!" Rhys sharply whispers back. "This is a waste of time. We should have stayed at the flat!"

"Well, why didn't you?" John drawls.

"Because of Captain Wow, here!"

Tosh and Ianto shush Rhys from raising his voice, trying to keep themselves unnoticed by the zombies.

"Will you stop it?" Tosh gives Rhys and Gwen a look. "We'll won't get anywhere by moaning."

As if on cue, the zombie pinned to the tree gives a low groan, catching Jack's attention. And gives Jack a brilliant idea. He spins to look at Gwen and gives her a wide grin. Gwen looks back at Jack, alarmed.

"Right," Gwen stares at the zombie after a few minutes, hands on her hips. She turns to the group and nods. "Let's all shake out, get nice and limber."

"Honey, I'm always nice and limber." John grins filthily from where he stood.

"Or not," Gwen deadpans and fondly watches Rhys give Hart a death glare. She points back to the zombie, careful to keep her distance, and starts giving them pointers. "Take another look at the way he moves. Remember, very limp." She smiles. "Almost like sleepwalking. Look at the face, it's vacant with just a hint of sadness. Like a drunk who's lost a bet."

The rest murmur at her unsurely, but Gwen takes it positively anyways. "Okay, let's all try, shall we? Ianto."

Ianto frowns, before giving his face a carefully mastered blank look and groaning lowly (reminding Jack too much of Ianto's, well, other groans for comfort), mimicking the zombie's actions as well as he can.

"Nice," Gwen watches approvingly. "Good vocal work."

"I bet he got lots of practice, making sinful sounds like that," John comments. Jack sharply hits his arm and everyone opts to ignore him.

"Okay," Gwen then turns to Estelle, who is right beside Ianto. Estelle is looking blankly at a spot behind Gwen, face unresponsive, and doing a very good act of it. "Estelle, that's excellent!"

Estelle gives a little jump, as if startled, and looks bewilderedly at Gwen. "Oh, sorry, dear. I was miles away."

Gwen is speechless and goes ahead to the next person, Tosh. Tosh reluctantly does her impression of the zombie. "How about that?"

"Good, good!" Gwen cheers. She turns to her boyfriend expectantly. "Rhys?"

Rhys makes a half-effort, and Gwen frowns at him. "Rhys! It's mournful, sorrowful, you're dead and you hate it. Go." Rhys does better this time, and she accepts it well enough. "Much better. John?"

John takes a drag from his cigarette and nonchalantly says, "I'll do it on the night."

"This is the night," Jack points out to his friend. John sighs, and does a mocking version of a zombie act. Jack laughs at his friend incredulously, asking, "What was that?"

"What about yours? Who died and made you fucking king of the zombies?" John challenges, and Jack returns it with a frown. He does a better impression than John does and his friend relents, "Yeah, that's pretty brilliant."

"Okay," Gwen claps her hands, "Let's all try together now, shall we?" She sees them all exchange dubious glances, but they were on a tight schedule. "One, two, three—" Deep breaths.


All together in one line, they anxiously make their way through the street full of zombies by imitating them. So far, none have caught on, but Ianto can't help but pessimistically think that something will ruin their illusion soon enough. The Hub is only a couple of meters away, its dark brick structure looking imposing and safe enough.

Ianto quietly pulls Tosh back towards him when a zombie strays too close to her for either of their comforts, and he sees Rhys do the same for Gwen. Jack is doing well enough, leading the troop towards the pub entrance, with he and John flanking Estelle's sides.

Either he's paranoid, Jack thinks, or some of the zombies are starting to catch on, because too many of the ones they passed turn back to follow them. Rhys and Gwen urge everyone faster so that their group is quickly right in front of the entrance. Jack tries to open the door, but it's locked. Shit.

"Alex," Jack whispers harshly to the small slot on the door. "Alex, Yvonne, are you there?" From the side, the zombified old lady who often is in the bar with them turns her milky eyes towards their group. "It's Jack and John. We come in all the time."

"They can hear you," Ianto murmurs to Jack, getting more nervous by the second.

"We can do the quiz," Jack pleads to the owners, assuming they were inside.

"They know," Tosh adds in, as she sees more and more zombies look towards them.

"Stay in character!" Gwen tells everyone, gripping her boyfriend's arm desperately.

"I can't see them," Jack says, inwardly cursing their luck.

"Jack," Ianto whispers, crouching beside him, "we have to get inside."

"Break the window?" Rhys offers. Gwen looks at their surroundings, considering.

"We can't do that," Tosh says. "We'll be totally exposed."

"We are totally exposed," Gwen then says. "Rhys is right, break the window!"

Not liking the idea, Ianto asks Jack, "Is there another way in?"

"Well, yeah, there's a—" Jack is about to reply when an annoying ringtone pierces through the air. John's ringtone.

"Two seconds," John tells everyone, plopping down on a wooden bench and answering the phone, "Hey, poodle."

Everyone gapes at him. Jack stands up, staring at his friend with a disbelieving expression.

"Alright?" They hear a woman say through John's mobile.

"Yeah, love, I can't right now, sorry."

"You get anything yet?"

"Nothing," John replies mournfully. "I'm a bit in the middle of something. Yeah, it's weird—"
Jack smacks the phone out of John's hand in one swift movement.

"Oi, what are you doing?" John exclaims.

"What am I doing?" Jack whispers harshly. "What are you doing, you stupid asshole?"

"Fuck off."

"You fuck off!" Jack half-shouts and hits John's arm not too lightly. "Fuck fucking off! I've spent an entire life—"

"Jack," Ianto tugs at Jack's blood-stained sleeve, but he ignores him for the time being.

"Look at me," Jack says at John, who had been looking down for his phone. "I've spent my entire life sticking my neck up for you and all you ever do is fuck things up—fuck things up and make me look stupid. Well, guess what? I'm not gonna let you do it anymore. Not today!"

"Jack," Ianto whispers to him insistently, tapping him on the shoulder.

Jack spins to look at Ianto, whispering back none too softly, "What?"

Wordlessly, Ianto points to the street in front of them. Where every zombie has their eyes straight at them.

"Oh." Jack gulps.

"You said something about another way in?" Ianto asks weakly.

"Yeah," Jack points somewhere to his right. "There's a—"

Gwen overturns a nearby metal bin to free it from its trash, and with all the strength she can muster, throws it right at the pub's glass windows.

"No!" Jack nearly pulls his hair out when the glass shatters open.

"Get inside!" Gwen shouts over the moaning of all the zombies.

"No," Jack shakes his head, mind quickly trying to figure out a new plan. "They'll just follow us. Keep up the act, I'll have to do something," he says determinedly.

Ianto stops him. "What do you mean do something?"

Jack just gives him a tired grin. "Don't worry, I'll be fine." He then grabs Ianto by the shoulders and gives him a soul-searing kiss.

During Ianto's momentarily shocked daze, Jack runs away from the group and steps up on a bench. "Hello, hello, over here!" he shouts to the zombies. "Come on, that's it! Over here!" All the zombies bring their attention at Jack, hands up and reaching towards him. "Oh, shit. Okay, guys, wait till I've gone, then get inside," he tells his companions.

"Gone where?" Ianto, Estelle, and John all echo at the same time.

"I won't be long, I promise." Jack gives them a blinding grin and jumps right into the crowd of those flesh-eating monsters. "Come on, you pasty-faced fuckers! Let's go, follow me!" He shouts as he leads the crowd away from the Hub's front entrance. "Come and get it, a running buffet! All you can eat!"

At Jack's growingly distant voice, they all exchange uneasy looks. They didn't want to think what Jack's act of sacrifice meant for him – if he was going to come back to them alive or not.

"So," Rhys slowly starts, "shall we go in, then?"

They all climb into the pub through the window, except for Estelle, whose eyes are fixed on a bouquet surrounded by trash. It must've been in the bin. She picks it up and sees the tag on it.

"Come on, Estelle," Tosh gently leads her to their makeshift entrance. "Leave those."

But she doesn't put them down, only saying, "I think they're for me."


They sit silently in the pub, only daylight serving as their source of light. The curtains of the shattered window are pulled over to give a semblance of a cover, but they stay a good distance away from it anyways. Estelle, Tosh, and Gwen are sitting on chairs while the men stand near them.

"He's been gone a good twenty minutes," Rhys comments from beside Gwen.

"Seventeen," Ianto quietly corrects. He knows this because he's been counting.

"Either way," Rhys sighs, "we need to think about what to do with the window. We're totally exposed."

"We could block it," Gwen says.

Tosh frowns at her, "But how will Jack get back in?"

"I'm sure he'll knock," John snorts.

Gwen stands up, looking around the pub, and finally sees the light switches. "We should get some lights on."

Ianto starts, quickly moving to try and stop her, "Gwen, wait!" But Gwen already flips them.
Nothing happens.

"Power's off." Gwen tsk's.

"That's a good thing," Ianto slowly says. "We shouldn't advertise our whereabouts any more than we already have."

"No, of course not," Gwen sullenly pouts. "I'm just being proactive! There's no lights, no power, and there's a hole in the window."

"You did that, love," John comments from by the game machine.

"Somebody had to do something!" Gwen hisses back. "I don't think you noticed, Vera, but we were in trouble! Somebody has to take control of the situation and if none of you are prepared to accept that responsibility then perhaps I should!"

Tosh shifts uneasily in her seat and Ianto lays a comforting hand on her. There's silence for a moment, then Estelle asks, "Will Jack be gone long?"

Gwen huffs as Ianto reassures the older woman, "He'll be back soon."

"How could you know that?" Rhys asks, dubious.

"I don't think he'd leave us," Tosh quietly says.

"Wouldn't he?"

"I think what Rhys is trying to say is," Gwen jumps into the conversation, "Ianto, how can you put your faith in a man you've binned for being unreliable?"

"A man whose idea of a romantic night spot and an impenetrable fortress is the same thing," Rhys grunts.

Ianto looks at his two friends, frowning, "Look, I know neither of you have ever approved of my relationship with Jack, but I doknow that Tosh is right – Jack wouldn't just leave us here. His plans, while mostly foolhardy and stupid, do work effectively enough most of the time."

"And what, are we counting this to be one of those times?" Rhys says. "We're in a pub! What are we going to do?"

"I could get a round in," John suggest cheerfully.

"You, shut up," Ianto tells John. He puts his attention back on the couple, who are both looking agitated and tired – just as the rest of them. "Guys, I'm sure we're all exhausted and ready for all of this to be over, but we can't just leave Jack out there. At least wait for him and barricade the window when he gets back."

"What then?" Gwen crosses her arms in front of her chest. "How long? Days, weeks, a month?"

Rhys then realizes something, choking out, "What about food, what are we gonna eat?"

"Toasties," Tosh grits out. She's irritated at this redundant argument already.

"Yeah," John grins, "there's a Breville out back."

"Oh, great, then!" Gwen throws her arms in the air in sarcastic relief. "Saved by nibbles!"

"Must be why Jack took us here before he buggered off, then," Rhys dryly adds.

"He's coming back!" Ianto glares at them. Any other day, he'd be amazed just how in-sync Rhys and Gwen were with each other when they were in the same side of the argument, all things considering.

"Why?" Rhys shouts. "Because he promised?"

"Ianto, love," Gwen tries to sweet-talk the younger man. "Even if he does, do you think his plan will be anything more than sitting and eating peanuts in the dark? Is he just gonna stroll in and suddenly everything's okay?"

"No, I don't know, Gwen!" Ianto finally shouts. It startles them all, even Tosh and Rhys who've known him for years before any of the others, because Ianto isn't the shouting type unless he's reached his boiling point. The last time he did, well… "I don't know any more than you do. But what I do know is that we're here now and we have to make the best of it. Because I want to live through this shit of a day in one piece with all of you, and I know you want you and your precious Rhys to do so as well!" Without taking his glaring eyes off a wide-eyed Gwen, he adds in a low whisper, "Hart, get me a double vodka."

"Right you are, Ianto." John immediately goes to do so, and the fact that he calls Ianto by his name (and not his customary 'Eye Candy') shows that even he was shaken by the younger man's outburst.

"I'll have a drink too, actually." Tosh sighs, standing up from her seat to follow Ianto to sit by the bar. "Would you like a drink, Estelle?"

Estelle just smiles absently. "Hello." That makes Tosh a little worried.

"I could do with a pint." Rhys sighs. He tentatively sits beside Ianto's tense form and lands a hand on his fellow countryman's shoulder. "Sorry, mate," Rhys apologizes sincerely. "It's just been a long day."

Ianto lets out a huge breath and gives Rhys a tired smile. "It's fine. I know how you feel about Jack."

Gwen, however, is stubborn. "Right, great!" She scowls at everyone. "We'll have a party and get completely smashed while the whole city gets eaten. We've got our nibbles, some mini cheddars." She throws packets of snacks at each of them.

"Gwen!" Rhys hisses at his girlfriend, but she doesn't relent.

"We've got Twiglets, and hey, look, Hog Lumps!" And she throws it randomly in the air, only for it to be suddenly caught by a large hand.

They all turn, and see Jack standing there, as if he hadn't even left.

"Hey kids." Jack grins and gives them a wink. "Miss me?"

"Jack!" Estelle beams and rushes towards her son. Jack kisses her cheek and gives her a gentler smile.

"Hello, Mom. Are you alright?" Then he asks the rest, "Everybody okay?" At Ianto's nod, he lets out a sigh of relief. "Any sign of Alex and Yvonne?"

"No." Tosh shakes her head.

"Checked upstairs?"

"It's locked."

"What's the phone situation?"

"Dead," Tosh answers, "same as the power."

"Okay." Jack nods, opening the pack of pork rinds Gwen had thrown at him. He looks up from his task to see Ianto in front of him, arms crossed and a small smile playing on his face.

"Nice of you to join us," Ianto says. There's obvious relief in his eyes.

"Yeah, well." Jack grins at him, "I promised, didn't I?" He offers the snack to Ianto. Ianto just rolls his eyes fondly and takes a piece for himself.

"How did you lose them?" Rhys asks from the side.

"I just gave them the slip," Jack shrugs nonchalantly. "It wasn't that difficult. They're not all that. In fact, I had more trouble in college whenever I had to sneak out of the ladies dorm—"

"Well, how did you get in?" Gwen cuts him off.

"There is a back door." Jack frowns at her. "I tried to tell you before you smashed the window."

Gwen is in a mood – that much is obvious – when she scoffs. "But it wasn't me blowing our cover by having a little tiff with your wife."

Jack's eyes throw her a glare. "He's not my wife."

"I concur," John pipes up from behind the bar. "Jack's the wife."

Jack turns indignantly to his friend. "Hey! If anyone's the wife, it'll be you."

"Oh," John waggles his eyebrows, "but I'll make a great wife."

Ianto's cough prevents Jack from retorting, and he can see that the younger man is a little displeased at their turn of conversation. Jack fancies to think he's jealous, even a bit. "So," Ianto carefully asks, "what's the plan, then?"


"Would anyone like a peanut?" Jack asks the silent group. It's nighttime and dark; they're sitting collectively in a booth, snacking on nibbles, their table filled with empty alcohol bottles.

There's an awkward silence, and then—

"Let's all have sex," John says, very seriously.

Everyone looks at him bewilderedly before Ianto dryly comments, "And I thought the end of the world couldn't get any worse." Rhys snorts to cover a snicker and Tosh bites her lip in amusement at that.

"Aw, come on, Eye Candy," John whines. Jack is glad he's separating them both. "End-of-the-world orgy and all that!"

"No." From Ianto's tone, Jack is sure that the young man was glad that he's separating them, too. He can't blame John for trying though, because Jack would fancy a shag too before he dies.

Suddenly, a bit of light makes its way through the windows, and Jack jumps up from his seat. "The power's on!"

"It's not," Gwen says with a frown. "I tried it earlier."

"The streetlights are on." Tosh points out, looking at the bright windows they've blocked with chairs. "It means the grid isn't out – it's just the fuses. If someone can flip them back on, everything should work."

"We can watch television," Jack gestures to the telly in an upper corner. "See what's going on around Cardiff and beyond."

"What about the lights?" Ianto asks, thinking.

"Yes," Gwen counters to Jack, "We don't advertise our whereabouts more than we already have."

"The lights should be on a separate circuit, though," Tosh says.

"I'll just flip the mains breakers, then." Jack shrugs. "It's quite simple, Gwen." He goes to the door with a plaque saying 'PRIVATE' on it, and enters the hall. There is Alex's quarters, but a quick try reveals that it is firmly locked shut, so Jack moves on in the dark to where he was sure the circuits were. He squints to carefully look at each switch, flipping a few on.

"Is that it?" Jack calls out to the main room after flipping the last switch.

"That's it," Ianto hollers back.

Jack should've left everything else alone, really, but he decides to flip another one. That one turns on the street light outside, and Jack sees through the back door's window something that unsettles him very much.

The zombies followed him.

Hastily, he flips the switch back off and pulls the blinds to cover the window. He ignores the hammering on the door as he swiftly goes back to the others. He doesn't see the doorknob of Alex's room twisting and rattling as well.

Jack shuts the door to the hallway, eyes frozen on the floor, and inwardly trying to think of another plan to keep them from getting infected or eaten. He's trying not to panic, really.

Meanwhile, Tosh is standing near the television and flipping through the channels. Everyone watches as they're met with only screens saying "STAND BY FOR MORE INFORMATION" with trepidation.

"Rhys," John walks up to the other man, "have you got a quid?

Rhys doesn't register the question first, and then absentmindedly goes through his pockets. "Uh, yeah," He says, handing John a couple of coins.

Tosh is still flipping through the channels when Jack dazedly walks towards Ianto to stand beside him. "Never anything on, is there?" Ianto tries to joke, but when he is met with silence, feels something is wrong. One look at Jack's face confirms it. "Jack, what's wrong?"

Jack snaps out of his thoughts and looks at Ianto with almost-hysterical eyes. "I think we might have a bit of a problem."

"What do you mean?" Reluctantly, Ianto asks.

"They followed me." Jack swallows the lump in his throat, looking back at the PRIVATE door.

Ianto's eyes widen a fraction in alarm. "Jack, I thought you said you gave them the slip."

"Yeah."

Ianto glances back at their oblivious companions and whispers as quietly as he can, "Well, we'll just have to be extra quiet then, won't we?"

Jack nods jerkily. Then they hear a squeak and a few feet away from them John is starting up a game in the game machine and that is not a good thing at all. The loud music from the machine confirms it all.

"John, no!" Jack and Ianto shout at the same time in growing horror.

Ianto grabs John away from the machine as it spouts out change from the win, while Jack hastily pulls the plug to turn it off. Still, the damage has been done.

Shadows start appearing nearer the pub windows, and they can hear the shuffling of feet coming towards them. The windows start to rattle from zombies pawing at the glass and low groaning can be heard from outside. There isn't a doubt as to who had come.

They all move closer together, none making a single sound. They're trapped.

Jack feels Ianto placing a hand on his shoulder and moves closer to the small comfort. John and Tosh flank Estelle's sides protectively, and Gwen curls an arm around Rhys'. All accounted for, it comes as a surprise when an extra hand lands on Rhys' shoulder.

"What the fuck?" Rhys shouts when he takes in the bloodied face of a zombie Alex. He jerks his shoulder away and pulls Gwen with him to maintain distance from the zombie.

"Where the fuck did he come from?" Gwen exclaims wide-eyed, gripping her boyfriend's bicep enough to hurt.

Everyone freezes when the jukebox starts playing Queen's Don't Stop Me Now, of all songs.

"Who the hell put this on?" Jack asks in bafflement.

"It's on random!" John answers.

"Oh, for fuck's sake," Ianto grinds out as they all slowly back away from Alex.

"Okay, Gwen, Tosh," Jack starts commandingly. "Get Mom somewhere safe. Rhys, kill the Queen."

"What?" Rhys asks, scandalized.

"I meant the jukebox!" Jack sees the three hurry to comply with his orders, and thank fuck for that, but the music still plays. "Ianto, John, grab something weapon-y."

"What about the rifle?" John points over to the gun above the bar.

"It's not real, John!"

"How about cocktails?"

"What do you mean?" Ianto says over the music.

"The flaming spirits— a bottle of brandy, get a rag in, light it," John explains. "Kaboom."

"But the whole place could go up." Jack smacks John in the arm.

Ianto then smacks Jack's arm. "Well what, then?"

They get backed up against a pool table and inspiration hits. Jack rolls and jumps over the pool table to grab the pool sticks. "Well, how about some pool?" He tosses Ianto and John each one.

The Queen song hits its chorus, and the three of them start hitting Alex's head and upper torso with their sticks – suspiciously to the beat of the song, Tosh and Gwen notice from their seats with Estelle.

The zombie just isn't going down, however, and it manages to grab Jack's weapon. Jack stumbles back and lands on his arse, but gets momentum to stand back up again, ready for another assault.

"I can't find the switches!" Rhys frustratedly shouts at Jack.

"Then get the fuses!"

Rhys runs to the back and immediately reaches the fuse box, randomly flipping switches to try to get the right one. Lights flicker on and off outside, the zombie hoard becoming even more fixated on the Hub building. Rhys flips another one, and the light outside the door beside him goes on, letting him see silhouettes of hands against the glass through the blinds. Rhys freezes when the glass breaks and the zombies start reaching for him so he scurries back into the main room. He narrowly manages to dodge Yvonne, also a zombie, from taking a bite of him before shutting the door.

"Why is Queen still on?" Jack yells at Rhys.

"We have a situation!" Rhys says, gesturing back to the hallway he just came from.

"I know!"

"Fuck this!" John throws his pool stick on the ground. "Two seconds."

"John!" Jack drops his stick as well, opting to push Alex back just enough for Ianto to give him a large hit on the head with a fire extinguisher. He even hoses the zombie with it.

Still, Alex goes for Jack again, and he struggles to keep Alex at least arm's length away from him.

"Jack!" Gwen calls, taking a dart from the dartboard and throwing it at them. It narrowly misses Jack's face.

Jack scowls at Gwen. "No!" But Gwen tries again, and this time it hits Alex's arm. "Okay, yes! Yes, in the head!"

Gwen beams and plucks another dart to throw. Only that one doesn't hit Alex's head – it hits Jack's. She gasps as the dart impales the side of Jack's skull.

"Ow!" Jack screams in absolute pain. Gwen is staring at him, wide-eyed and horrified.

"Jack!" John growls a few feet away. In his hand is the rifle.

Jack catches the gun as it's thrown at him, ignoring the pain of the dart piercing his skull (for fuck's sake) for now, and uses it to attack. Alex's head makes a sickening crunch when the rifle impacts the side of it. With a scream of raw frustration and anger, Jack pushes Alex to the jukebox that's still bloody playing until his head is buried deep into the machine. Sparks fly and finally the music stops.

No one says anything for a moment, all staring at the destroyed jukebox and the dead pub owner.

"Why the hell didn't you just shoot him?" John rolls his eyes.

Jack breathes deep, in and out, before turning to his friend. "John, for the last time, it's—"

BANG.

The shot hits the wine glasses atop the bar and Jack is thrown aback by the recoil as everyone else jumps in surprise.

"I fucking knew it!" John crows. "What did I tell you? I was right!"

"Okay, fine," Jack breathes when he's upright again. He reaches for the dart in his head and steadily pulls it out, a little blood spurting out of the wound. "But dogs can look up."


"Alright," Jack says after they've found the box of bullets for the rifle. Wrapped around his head to cover his head wound is the red tie Ianto had been wearing. "Has anyone fired a gun before?"

"Oh, yeah." John grins.

"Apart from John."

"I'm a pacifist," Gwen declares.

"Okay," Jack sighs, "apart from John and Gwen."

"Sorry," Ianto frowns at Jack, "what was John's experience?"

"Uh," Jack glances back uneasily at his friend, who smiles in mock innocence. "He shot his old girlfriend's ex-boyfriend in the leg once." Then Jack thinks about it again and frowns. "Or was it her brother?"

"I think you should do it," Tosh immediately says.

Jack shakes his head. "I think we should all do it."

"How can six people operate one gun?" Rhys asks in confusion.

"No one has any real experience, okay?" Jack insists. "We've only got—"

"Twenty-nine," John says after counting.

"Twenty-nine bullets."

"Oh," John nudges Jack. "Call them shells."

"Twenty-nine shells," Jack corrects himself exasperatedly. "We really need to work together in this. I need someone to help me reload, everyone else to keep a look out. I'll fire. As Bertrand Russell once said, the only thing that will redeem mankind is co-operation." He gives everyone a determined look. "I think we can all appreciate the relevance of that now."

Ianto raises an eyebrow at the quote, and when Jack is near enough, he murmurs, "Was that on a beer mat?"

"Yeah," Jack gives him a sheepish grin. "It was Guiness Extra Cold."

Ianto just fondly sighs and smiles at him. "I won't say anything, then."

"Thanks." Jack smiles back, sincerely.

A loud crash brings their attention to one of the windows they've barricaded with chairs.

"They definitely want to come in," Tosh says, looking at the grabby hands with alarmed eyes.

Jack turns to Ianto, giving the young man a small peck on the forehead and tells him, "Get Mom out of the way." Ianto just nods and rushes back to where Estelle sat. Jack calls out to the others, "You guys, let's go! John, give me some shells."

And he starts loading the rifle.


"Estelle?" Ianto gives her a reassuring smile. "Would you like to come with me?"

"Oh, that would be lovely." Estelle beams back, still clutching on the bouquet of flowers, and stands up to follow him. "It's nice to meet you, finally," she tells him as he leads her away from Jack and the others, who are loading as many bullets as they can into the rifle. "Jack's always talking about you."

That startles Ianto a little bit. "Really?"

"Yeah." She then gasps in pain. "Ah."

Ianto gently sets her down on a seat against the wall worriedly. "Estelle? Are you alright?"

Estelle doesn't answer, instead shakily reaches for something beneath the collar of her shirt. "I've got something for you," she says. With trembling hands, Estelle presents a necklace to Ianto. "Jack's father gave me this – his real father, I mean. I know it's rather on the feminine side, but I'd like you to have it."

It's a nice necklace, and its history is even more precious. But… "Estelle," Ianto uncomfortably tells her, "Jack and I have—"

"It seems only right." Estelle gives Ianto a shaky smile. She then closes her eyes and grimaces in pain.

Ianto notices her cradling her wrist, and with trepidation he turns it to look and sees tissues peeking from her sleeve. Pulling back the cloth, he glances at Estelle's resigned face and finally peels the tissue from her skin.

On her wrist, a gaping wound starts oozing dark blood.

Ianto gasps and his head flies to look at Jack's mother in comprehending horror.

"I didn't want to say anything," Estelle quietly says. "I thought Jack would be worried."

"Ianto?" Jack looks at them with a questioning look, mentally asking why they haven't gone yet. Ianto isn't sure how he's supposed to look at Jack in the eye right now.

Thankfully, Rhys suddenly exclaims, "Here they come!"

The barricade they put on the window collapses, and Jack says to them, "Stay behind me!"

"There's one!" Gwen points.

"Sorry," Jack smirks at the zombies. "We're closed!" He pulls the trigger, but nothing happens. "Wha—"

"The safety!" Tosh hastily points out.

Gwen comments, "That happened to me on stage."

"Oh," John rolls his eyes at all them, "cock it!"

Jack cocks the rifle, points, and shoots with a bang. He misses, but it was close enough. John grins at him smugly.

"Over there!" Gwen shouts and points to a newly shattered window as Jack takes another shot at a zombie and misses.

"Over where?" Jack cocks the gun again. He shoots again, and this time it hits. Aw, yeah.

"Three o'clock!" John tells Jack, referring to the one Gwen saw. Jack turns a little to the right and fires a shot at them.

Tosh has caught up with their method, of course. "Quarter to twelve!" she shouts amidst the sound of multiple zombies groaning.

"What?" Jack exclaims, shooting at random zombies at this point.

"Eleven forty five!" Rhys says.

Jack groans. "Keep it simple!"

"Top left!" John then exclaims. Jack turns to said direction, everyone following behind him, and pulls the trigger, only for it not to work. "Reload."

"I was going to!" Jack snaps, working shells into the rifle hastily. A female zombie is rising to enter through the window and Jack looks up just in time to give it a nice, bloody headshot.

"Nice shot!" John whistles.

"Okay, Tosh, Rhys, Gwen," Jack says commandingly, pointing at the open window they've been shooting at. "Let's block up this window. John, take over for a sec." He then hands the rifle to his best friend and rushes to his mother.

"What is it? What's wrong?" he asks. Estelle's face is getting paler, her expression rather dazed.

"Jack," Ianto murmurs, "I'm so sorry."

Jack looks at Ianto's sad expression and sits beside his mother to wrap his arms around her. "Mom, what's wrong?"

Estelle smiles weakly at Jack. "I didn't want to be a bother."

Jack sees blood seeping through her cardigan sleeve, and pulls it back to see— He immediately covers it again, throat dry. "Mom, I don't understand."

"The man in his pajamas," she gasps out. "I didn't want to say anything, thought you'd be upset."

"No, no," Jack's voice hitches. "You should've said."

John sees Jack holding his mother close in despair, and knows something is wrong. He frowns. "Hey," he tells Rhys. "Take over for a sec." And gives him the rifle before he rushes over to Estelle, Jack, and Ianto.

Tosh and Gwen have also turned their attention to the scene a couple of feet away from them. Rhys asks, "What the hell's going on?"

"Estelle's hurt!" Ianto replies.

Tosh immediately runs to them worriedly. Rhys absentmindedly hands the gun over to Gwen and follows Tosh towards the others. "I know first aid!" he calls.

Gwen just stares at the rifle in her hands.

"Mom," Jack pleads as he lays her down the seat. "Just hang on, Mom. You're gonna be fine."

"Jack," Estelle struggles to say. "I never thanked you."

"For what?"

She smiles at her son and weakly raises the flowers her hand still gripped. "For these. 'To a wonderful mum.'" A few tears start dripping down Jack's face. Estelle wipes a few away. "It's been a funny sort of day, hasn't it?"

Suddenly, she freezes, and then starts convulsing. Everyone else silently watches as Jack pleads and cries and sobs over his mother's body, feeling grief overwhelming them as well. She finally stays deathly still.

The sound of the gun cocking startles them all.

They all turn to see Gwen determinedly standing over them, rifle pointing right at Jack and Estelle.

"What are you doing?" Jack whispers harshly. Gwen flinches a bit, but stands her ground.

"We have to deal with her!"

"Gwen!" Tosh exclaims in an appalled voice.

Ianto is outraged. "For Christ's sake, Gwen!"

"She's gonna come back!" Gwen shouts, frazzled. "She'll change!"

"She's my mom!" Jack yells back. "She's not going anywhere."

"She's a zombie."

"Don't say that!"

Gwen presses her lips together into a thin line. "Move aside," she barks. "I'm gonna count to three—One… two… three—"

Jack smashes the end of a beer bottle and furiously points it right at Gwen's neck. "Don't point that gun at my mom!"

"Jack!" Ianto says. "Calm down!"

However, just as he says that, John shatters the end of his own bottle and points it at Gwen as well. "Don't point that gun at Estelle!"

"For fuck's sake, John, don't exacerbate things!" Ianto says frustratingly.

"What does that mean?"

The sound of another glass shouting catches their attention and now Rhys had joined in, threateningly holding his bottle at Jack. "Don't you dare hurt Gwen!" he growls.

Tosh is pale and alarmed at the turn of events, and pleads, "Please, can we just stop and think about this?"

"Tell her to put the gun down!" Jack says at no one in particular.

"Look, she's gonna change," Gwen starts vehemently. "You know I'm right. And when she does, she'll kill allof us."

"Gwen is right!" Rhys tells Ianto. "That's what your ex can't seem to realize!"

Jack gapes at them. "That's what this is about, isn't it?" He laughs hysterically. "It's just- neither of you like me! He's always hated me and she can't decide between despising me and wanting to fuck me so now they want to shoot my mom!"

Rhys grinds his teeth. "She's not your mu—"

"Rhys never thought I deserved him or that I was good enough," Jack continues, barely aware at what he was revealing to Ianto about his friends. "And we all know Gwen's in love with Ianto."

"That is not true," Gwen immediately gasps in denial. Rhys finally shuts his mouth.

"Oh, yes it is." Jack snorts. "You may spend half your time looking at other men like me or trying to find stability with Rhys, but it's ridiculously obvious what you really feel."

Gwen shakes her head and insists, "That's not true."

"Yes, it is," Rhys says quietly. Ianto looks on at everyone with a carefully blank face.

"What?"

Rhys sighs at stares at Gwen wearily. "We all know you only hung out with me and Tosh at college to get close to Ianto," he says. "And when he knocked you back, I was there to pick up the pieces." He nods towards a quiet Tosh, who wouldn't look Gwen in the eye. "Tosh and I've come to terms with that, Gwennie. Why can't you?"

Gwen avoids eye contact with anyone, and where Ianto stood says, "Ianto, I want you to know that my feelings for you—"

"Gwen," Ianto sternly says with a low voice. "There are slightly more pressing more matters at hand here."

"Yeah," Jack growls, "like the fact that 'Gwennie' is pointing a gun at my mom!"

"I'm not the one who's being unreasonable, Jack!" Gwen yells back.

"Christ, she's not dead!"

"She's finished!" Gwen says. "For a hero, you're quite a hypocrite. I don't know what I ever saw in you!"

Jack sputters at her in disbelief. "You're the one who's gone from Gwen bleeding heart Cooper to- to serial mother killer!"

"I'm not a mother killer! I'm doing this for our own good!" Gwen clenches back. "She's not your mum anymore, Jack. In a minute she'll be just another zombie."

"Don't say that!"

John makes an affirmative growl. "We're not using the zed word."

Then Tosh steps up to the group and shouts, "Please, can we just calm the fuck down!" She pushes the gun to point in the ground and at that, everyone else drops their beer bottles to their side.

"Thank you, Tosh," Ianto coughs. Then he glares at Gwen, "Now, I can see what Gwen is trying to say—"

"Thank you," Gwen says unhappily.

"Even if she is being a bitch," Tosh mutters. John snorts in agreement.

"And Jack," Ianto turns to his ex and rests his hand on Jack's neck. "Jack, look at me." He gives the older man a devastated, sympathetic look and continues, "I can't imagine how hard this must be for you, but we can't afford to fall apart. Jack—cariad—I know you don't want to hear this but—"

They freeze as from the corner of their eyes they see Estelle's body sit up slowly. They turn at her just in time to see her open eyes – and as they slowly back away – see it milky white. Just like the rest of the zombies.

Gwen hastily hands the rifle to Jack. "You do it," she nervously says.

Quietly, Jack takes the firearm and stares at it before readying himself to shoot. "I'm sorry, Mom."

Estelle stares at Jack with wide eyes, too much reminiscent of how she did the same thing when she was alive, and Jack falters.

"Do it!" Gwen exclaims and that makes Estelle growl at her, before her brain decorates the wall with a splatter after a bang.

Jack drops the gun and numbly stares at his mother's corpse.

"Well," Gwen says. "I think we're all agreed you did the right thing there—"

Jack slaps Gwen to the ground and she immediately latches on to the gun Jack had dropped, pointing it right at him. She pulls the trigger, but nothing happens.

"Gwen!" Rhys looks at his girlfriend in disbelief. It was one thing to point a gun on a person that's already dead, and a whole different thing to point it at their friend's ex, as much as they didn't like him.

They're at a standstill for a while until Gwen scrambles to her feet. "Right, I'm leaving."

"What?" Tosh asks, alarmed.

"I'm not staying here." Gwen starts unblocking the door.

"Gwen, don't," Ianto's calm is betrayed by a small tremble in his voice. "It's suicide."

"I think you should go," John adds.

"We will." Gwen tries convincing them. "We can defend ourselves."

Rhys stares at her. "What do you mean 'we'?"

She turns to Rhys with a betrayed look. "What do you mean, 'what do you mean we?'"

"Gwen," Rhys slowly says. "Opening that door now would be a very, very silly thing to do."

"What, so you're gonna stay here with him?" Gwen makes a gesture to Jack's direction.

"Look—"

"After everything he's done to us so far?"

"Let me finish!" Rhys roars. "You were the first one who wanted to go! Jack didn't ask us to come here—we came here for the same reason, because we didn't know what else to do! Now get away from that door this instant!"

"But—" Gwen steps to the side, closer to the window.

"Gwen!"

Gwen stops in front of the covered window and looks at her feet. "I'm so sorry, Rhys."

"Love," Rhys says gently. "Maybe I'm not the one you should be apologizing to."

Gwen bites her lip and hesitantly glances at Jack. "Jack, I—"

A loud crash makes them all jump and the window behind Gwen breaks open, allowing zombies to reach their hands into the pub and grab her.

"Gwen, no!" Rhys runs forward and tries to pull her back in by the leg, the others following to save her. John picks up the gun and goes to reload it as fast as he can.

"No!" Gwen screams. "No! No!"

"Gwen!"

Even as they grip her legs, it doesn't stop the zombies from ripping through her clothes and opening her stomach with their bare hands. The monsters take out her intestines easily and eat them, the four of them only able watch in morbid horror at the act. Her limbs start getting ripped off, and soon they were left with only Gwen's legs as her torso was carried off deeper into the wave of zombies.

"Gwen!" With a tight grip on his girlfriend's detached leg, Rhys runs to the door and unlocks it.

"Rhys, no!" Jack, Ianto, and Tosh scream after him.

Rhys opens the door and braces himself. "I'm coming, Gwen!" And he runs into the crowd, batting away the zombies in his way with Gwen's leg.

The three of them move back to where John stands, rifle at the ready. They all watch as around them, zombies start finding ways into the pub.

"Oh, dear," Tosh says weakly.

"Cocktails?" John asks the group, and Ianto immediately nods.

"Do it."

John hands the gun to the younger man and runs behind the bar. To buy time, Tosh takes a barstool and with a battle cry, uses it to push a line of zombies back out of the pub. Ianto gives the gun to Jack to help her, and Jack handles the gun as if he's been doing so all his life.

"Stay back!" Ianto barks at the zombies, he and Tosh standing their ground with effort. Jack is shooting at the zombies carefully, not wanting to waste any bullets on misses, while John is hastily trying to make an explosive to use.

"Jack, hold them!"

John finally lights up the rag hanging out of the bottle's opening and grins. He runs and stands near the PRIVATE door, ready to throw and calling out "Heads!" when the door bursts open and he is grabbed by multiple hands into the hall.

"John!"

John emerges from the door without the cocktail. "Hey, Jack, look who it is!" He grins gleefully and gestures behind him. From the hall, a still naked Owen appears.

Jack gapes. "Fuck-a-doodle-doo!"

"Jack!" Tosh and Ianto shout. "We can't hold them much longer!"

John's inattention costs him, however, because Owen gets a hold of him, and John is too busy prying him away to notice Yvonne sneak up from behind until it was too late.

"John, no!"

Yvonne bites him in the neck as the same time as Owen, who goes for his arm. John screams in pain, and Jack points the gun at them.

"Owen!" Jack cocks the gun when his housemate raises his head to look at him. "I said leave him alone!" He shoots and hits Owen right in the eye.

After Owen falls on the floor, Jack sees his friend under too many zombies. "John!" Jack calls out, but there's no reply. He doesn't have time to save him, however, because the zombies are right over their shoulders and they have to move.

"Jack." Ianto grips his arm, Tosh still trying to push zombies back with the barstool. "Bar!"

The three of them run and jump over the bar's countertop to get behind it. For a moment, Ianto falls on top of Jack before they have to part. They stay low on the ground as the zombies continue to reach for them.

"John!" Jack calls out again. "Joh—"

A body falls beside them in a loud thump and John groans. Tosh grimaces at the amount of blood he has on him.

"What?" John moans at their stare. "Chuck us a cloth, will you?"

Jack looks up and reaches to take a wiping cloth off the counter, tossing it to John afterwards. He then stands up, opens a bottle of brandy, and starts pouring its contents right on the counter. He lights it up and the zombies are thrown aback by the sudden ring of fire.

"Where are the shells?" Ianto asks when Jack slumps back down.

John thinks for a second. "They're on the bar."

"Oh, for the love of—" Jack curses and he stands up again, quickly looking for the box of bullets. It's standing right amongst the flames and whenever Jack tries to reach for it, he only gets burned.

"Forget it." Jack drops down beside Ianto. "What are we gonna do? Where are we gonna go?"

John raps his knuckles on the floor. "The cellar."

"Maybe we can get out!" Tosh says hopefully.

"There's a hatch out on the street," John tells them.

Ianto grimaces, "You mean go back outside?"

The old lady Hub regular manages to find a way into the bar. Jack groans.

"Oh, give us a break!"

Suddenly, bullets from the box start ricocheting all over the place. One luckily hits the lady right in the head, and they take that opportunity to go into the cellar.

"Go, go, go!"

Jack helps John down the stairs, Tosh behind them, and Ianto firmly shutting the door. He drops John's bloodied self on the ground with a grunt.

"I can see the street," Tosh says, pointing at the strip of light above them. Jack reaches and tries to open the doors, but to no avail.

"Come on," he grinds out, "Come on! Why won't it open?" He rattles the doors in frustration.

Ianto glances back at Jack from where he kneels in front of John. Firmly, he places the towels he found in the cellar on John's wounds to slow the bleeding.

Jack sighs, and sits on the floor under the door. "That's it then," he says miserably. "We're trapped. 'Hey, let's all go to the Hub!' Whose fucking idea was that?" He presses his palms against his face and then runs his hands through his hair. "Man, I've really ballsed this up."

Ianto and Tosh share a glance and without a word, Tosh takes Ianto's place by John. Ianto sits beside his ex, putting a comforting hand on his shoulder.

"No, you haven't," he murmurs.

"But I have, Ianto." Jack groans. "I couldn't save us. I couldn't save Gwen or Rhys. I couldn't even save Mom. I'm useless."

"You shouldn't feel so responsible, Jack. You tried," Ianto says. "You did something, that's what counts, yeah?"

"Yeah, I suppose." He sighs.

The cellar door creaked ominously. They all share a knowing glance.

"Do you think they'll get through?" Tosh asks.

Jack nods in resignation. "Yeah."

"How many shells have we got left?" Ianto asks Jack.

Jack thinks, mentally calculating on how many they've put in and used. "Three." He shrugs. "I suppose we could take a few of them out if they stand in a line."

"I wasn't thinking about them."

Jack and Tosh don't say anything for a moment. "I know." The older man murmurs and Tosh bows her head.

The creaking above them gets louder.

Jack frowns. "Wait, what about John? There's only three shells."

"I don't mind being eaten." John grins and waggles his eyebrows. It's amazing that, even at this time, he can still joke about that.

He rolls his eyes at his friend and grabs the gun from beside him. "How are we gonna do this?"

"I don't know," Ianto frowns. "Uh, one of us has to go first."

"Maybe one should do the other two and then do themselves?" Tosh suggests uncertainly.

"You should do me," Ianto says, and even if he's not looking at Jack, they both know he meant him. "I'm not sure I can handle a gun properly – I'll probably muck it up if I have to do myself."

Jack shakes his head. "I don't think I've got it in me to shoot my flatmate, my mom, and my boyfriend all in the same evening."

Ianto looks at Jack with an unreadable expression. "What makes you think I've taken you back?" Ianto says slowly. "And I thought you hated that word – boyfriend."

Tosh discretely looks away and quietly fusses over John to give the two of them a semblance of privacy.

"Well…" Jack reaches to stroke Ianto's hair. "You don't want to die single, do you? And I've been thinking about a lot of things-"

"Actually," John dryly cuts them off, "I would like to be shot. Like, now."

Jack ignores him. "And well. I've changed. I haven't had a smoke since yesterday, I promise." He lightly jokes. John slurs a confirmation at that statement.

"Maybe we should have one now." Ianto reaches into his back pocket and pulls out a very familiar pack of cigarettes. Tosh giggles in amusement when Jack sputters.

"What?" He raises an eyebrow at Jack. "You left them in my flat."

"Yeah," Jack snorts. "In the bin."

"I was desperate."

"Sneaky monkey."

Ianto smiles sheepishly at him and hands him one. "Sorry." Jack lights his lighter, but before it could go near the cigarette, he sees Ianto notice something from behind him. He turns around and brings the flame higher to light up a control with buttons. He, Ianto, and Tosh look at each other in realization.

"Come on," Jack tries to pull John up. "We're getting out of here."

John doesn't budge, however. "I might just stay here," he murmurs. "Figured you guys should make a proper go of it."

"What are you talking about?"

John nods to where Ianto stands, behind Jack. "I only hold you back."

"Yeah, but—"

John shakes his head and Jack knows a lost argument when he sees one. Quietly, he hands John the rifle. "Maybe you should have this."

"Don't you want it?"

"No." Jack tries to be casual, but he hears his voice break anyways. "You'll probably be better at it anyway." He takes a deep breath. "John, I'm sorry."

"What for?"

"Cause I was shouting at you earlier on."

John snorts and waves it off. "It's alright. Had worse from this one chick in secondary school, remember? And I'm sorry too."

"It's okay."

"No." John says. "I'm sorry, Jack."

It takes a moment to register Jack's mind, and when it does he already catches a whiff of it. "Oh, God, that is so not funny!"

John smirks. "I'll stop doing 'em when you stop laughing."

"I'm not laughing!" Jack tries to hold back a grin but fails. "It's gross!" It doesn't take any more than a second for the smile to fall off again, though.

"You'd better be off," John says. Jack silently nods and places his cigarette between John's lips and lights it for him. The cellar door breaks open.

"Bye, John," he murmurs to his best friend.

"Cheers." John gives him a rare, sweet and sincere smile. He whispers, "Love you, you know. And you should tell the same thing to Eye Candy over there, too. From me and from you."

Jack gives him a shaky and teary smile. "Lame."

He stands up, grabs a small axe, and joins Tosh and Ianto, who are standing quietly and solemnly at the platform.

"Goodbye, John," Ianto says, eyes looking suspiciously teary. "Thank you."

"Anything for you, Eye Candy."

With a push of a button, the three of them rise up out of the cellar and into the street outside the Hub. Most of the zombies are apparently inside the burning pub, but Jack doesn't doubt that they'll be noticed soon. So he turns to his two remaining companions, "Ready?"

They nod back. "Ready."

Just then, a large truck runs over some zombies and stops right in front of them, bright lights blinding their eyes. Several uniformed soldiers come out from the back and go stomping towards the building, machine guns ready and shooting at the undead. After the assault, the three of them stare as the soldiers rush into the pub and two particular figures catch Jack's eye.

"Oh my god," one of the figures breathes. "Jack!"

"Doctor?!" Jack stares at him incredulously. "Rose?!"

The two run towards them, giving a couple of zombies a good smack along the way.

"How are you doing?" The Doctor asks.

Jack, Ianto and Tosh share a glance. "Surviving." Jack shrugs.

"They're taking us somewhere safe," Rose gently explains. "We thought you guys might want to tag along."

"Is it only the three of you?" The expression on the Doctor's face was sad when they numbly nodded. "Well, glad somebody made it. Come on."

They follow the couple tiredly, and when Jack reaches for Ianto's hand, Ianto takes it without any hesitation.


Epilogue

"Next – the story of ten-year-old Jasmine Pierce, who fought off the reanimated corpses of her entire family. It's all coming right up on Zombies From Hell."Next channel.

"Six months on and, to many, the events of Z-Day must seem like a bad dream. As we now know, the phenomenon resulted from the use of—"Next.

"…Not something I ever expected as a newscaster to have to say on air. 'Removing the head or destroying the brain.' Incredible."Next.

"The fact that the mobile deceased retained their primal instincts make them ideal recruitment for the service industry, as well as other roles such as—"

Jack groans awake and staggers downstairs to the living room. He hears before sees Ianto on the couch, watching television. He lets out a big yawn before joining his lover in the well-decorated living room.

"Hello." Ianto smiles at him, giving Jack a kiss the moment he sits down, and turns off the telly.

"What's the plan then?" Jack asks.

"Right," Ianto thinks for a moment. "Cup of coffee, of course. Head down to Tosh's for lunch, veg out in the pub for a bit, wander home, watch a bit of telly, and go to bed."

"Perfect," Jack grins. "I especially like the last one." He strokes Ianto's leg suggestively. Ianto just rolls his eyes in fondness before getting up.

"I'll get the coffee on."

"You know what I like!" Jack calls after him. "Oh, I might pop into the garden for a bit."

"Go on, then."

"Two seconds," Jack murmurs before going out and heading for the shed. He closes the shed door after entering, grabs a controller, and plops right on the ground.

"Player two has entered the game," the game's voice says and Jack reaches for the television's remote control. John moves towards it just for a little bite but Jack swiftly pulls his arm away.

"John!"

Zombie John groans in response.

FIN.


Comments and/or Reviews are loved and appreciated!