Diclaimer: I don't own D. Gray - Man.
Warning: Physical child abuse and very vague mention of attempted sexual child abuse…and so on…
!Very important Info!:
This is a side story for both "Secrets" and "The Joker, the Jack and the King"
This is set when Mana meets Fem!Allen/Ellen after Neah betrayed the Earl. She is seven in this part…
Third Part: Mana Walker would forever walk forward, one step at a time...
Mana Walker was nothing but a human. A plain human that had nothing all that special about him. His only real gift was entertaining others, so it was only natural that he took up the profession of a traveling performer. He had traveled to many places, choosing to never stay in one place to long.
If he stayed in one place for to long then he would see that ugliness. People hurting other people for no other reason then to hurt. Mana always liked to see the good in things, he had always been able to see things in black and white.
But now, after he had lost everything dear to him, Mana had trouble seeing anything other then the ugliness, anything other then the black. He could remember preaching to Neah about how there was still good in the world. That humans, that humanity, could still be saved…
Mana Walker may have been a human, but he had been seen as family to the Clan of Noah. He had been allowed to stay on the Ark with Neah when the Earl had come for him. He had been part of that family for a short time…
If you could call two years a short time.
He had a hard time excepting it all at first, but he was also always one to adept to anything life throw at him. It had taken some getting used to, granted, but Mana had excepted his brother for who he was. For What the Clan of Noah planed to do, for the role Neah would play in it. Neah may be the Fourteenth Noah, the Chosen Child, but he would always be Mana's little brother first, but again he was only human.
So Mana had taken to studying magic to make himself useful. He hated being a burden to anyone, let alone his little brother. He had excelled at it apparently, because even the Earl had been imprested. But none of that metered anymore.
Neah was dead, Miria was dead, his sweet little niece was...
Mana's ties to the Clan of Noah gone with his brothers death. He wasn't sure exactly what had happened, he had simply left Maria and little Ellen to fetch more food, when he returned he had found the small wooden cabin partly destroyed and the bloody body of his brother.
An Exorcist that he had never seen before sitting on the ground next to his brothers body. Mana had understandably flown into a rage and had attacked the red haired man. But Mana was only human and the Exorcist had beaten him, and then had explained that Maria was dead and Neah had gone and tried to kill the Earl. That his little brother had returned to the cabin only to die a few hours later from his wounds.
Mana had wept brokenly over the cold body of his brother...
He wept for hours because he was simply human and there was nothing else that he could do…
The Exorcist had left, one of Mana's spell books in hand. His green eyes full of regret but oddly determined. The clown had stayed and buried his brother. He had eventually (once he could find the strength to leave his brothers side) looked for the bodies of Maria and his small little niece, but was an able to find them…
He walked away from that little wooden cabin by nightfall. He walked forward with no thought of to where he was going. He would walk until he died, Mana decided. It was as simple as that.
Mana walked and lived…
A small peace of hope buried deep in his heart at the fact that the Exorcist had said nothing about his niece being dead. Without a body Mana could hope…
He made a living as a clown. Earning just enough to continue moving, hoping that death would come for him quickly, trying to not see all the black around him as he went. He continued like this for seven long years…
Mana had just joined a traveling circuses. Him and his companion, Allen the mutt, joining the troop as a temporary Clown. He had been with the troop for a few days when his little dog came up beaten and dead. The traveling Clown had felt a small twist in his heart, but he couldn't find it within himself to cry.
He had just finished burring him, his mind lost in a memory of when he had buried his little bother…
"Is he really dead?" a young voice asked, though the tone was oddly empty and cold for sounding so young. Mana, still dressed in his Clown attire had turned to the serous of the voice. His dark gray eyes met a pair of eyes filled with dull silver.
Those hauntingly familiar eyes set in a equally familiar face, and for a moment Mana had forgotten that the small child had asked him a question. His heart clenching in pain and hope. His eyes stung but the tears wouldn't fall. The traveling Clown shook his head and force his heart to not beat so fast…
"Yes, he's dead" Mana forced out. His eyes still not leaving the small frame of the child standing next to him. Silver eyes blinked slowly and then turned to look at the grave. Mana frowned at the dead look within the small girls eyes.
The small child blamed the dogs death on one of the other clowns, but Mana was barely hearing what the little girl was saying. His heart aching for what he had lost, but the years telling him to not get his hopes up. He had seen plenty of little Ellen's after all. None of them were ever his little niece, and his heart would break just a little more each time he found himself hoping…
Mana was an observant man when he chose to be, so he watched with his calculating gray eyes. He took note of the color of her eyes first, they were truly silver, no blue or any other color mixed within them. He took note of the color of her hair, which was a light brown, badly in need of a good brushing.
Mana noted the little thing was obviously malnourished, her small frame thin and almost nothing but bones. Her skin an almost sickly pale and Mana was himself sickened to see the bruises that covered her small thin body. Mana had the feeling that he knew who had beat the girl, and voiced his question. The clown that the child blamed his little dogs death on...
"Did Kojmo beat you?" He asked. This earned the clown a angry glare, those silver eyes flashing sharply.
"Shut up!" She hissed at him, her thin lips pulled down in a furious frown. Mana simply offered the poor little thing a sad smile.
He was such a sad foolish old man. Letting himself think, yet again, that there was still something in this world…
Mana sighed and moved to stand, the little girl kept her small hands in the pockets of her dirty brown dress. She slowly crouched down after watching Mana stand. Her silver eyes looking so empty that Mana could feel the pain in his heart increasing at the sight.
No child should have that look in their eyes…
"One of these days I'll leave this place." she whispered quietly, her voice still filled with that horrid emptiness. Mana frowned, but then forced a smile on his lips. He bent back down and pulled a peace of candy from his pocket. Mana had learned to always keep some on hand long ago, children loved it if you gave them candy after all...
He was about to open his mouth to offer the poor little thing a peace when an angry voice called out, cutting him off. "There you are you little rat! Its dinner time. Do your job or your out on your worthless little ass!" The head cook bit out as he came to stand a few steps away from the clown and the child.
Mana frowned again, and he so badly wanted to tell the man to not speak to the little girl that way, but again the words died on his tongue when the small girl next to him slowly stood.
Mana frowned deeper at the blank look on the child's face and also stood. He watched her hurry passed the furious cook when the man smacked her on the back of the head. The small child didn't even cry out as she stumbled and then fell to the ground, her hands leaving her pockets to break her fall.
"Hey!" Mana called out, his anger rising at seeing how the girl was being treated, and by the look at how she merely stood and brushed the dirt from her clothes, told him that this was a normal thing.
To say Mana was angry was an understatement. In his opinion the worst thing one could do was hurt a child.
Yet another black stain that he didn't want to see…
The cook fixed him with a look. "Mind your place! You're a temp, and the Troop Leader can still kick you out and not pay you." The man hissed and turned to stalk passed the little brown haired girl.
Those silver eyes were looking at him oddly and Mana offered her a soft smile after a heavy sigh. The girl blinked and took a step back, and Mana could see that she was not used to being shone kindness. That hurt the worst, seeing that look on that face. He was over joyed however when her small lips twitched up just slightly, before she turned and ran after the cook.
But not before Mana caught sight of her left hand.
His heart was in his throat and for the first time sense his brothers death, Mana wished for all the world that he could still cry.
Only so he could weep in joy.
He didn't know what to do, a few hours later found the traveling clown pacing his wagon. Leaving the little girl here was no longer an option, now that he knew for sure that she his sweet little niece. But he was also sure she wouldn't just come with him, with a man that she didn't know just because he claimed to be her uncle.
Mana shook his head and decided that he couldn't keep himself from going to see her any longer, his heart wouldn't let him wait. He had thought he had lost everything, but now, after seven long years, he had found a piece of the family he thought lost to him…
The old clown exited his wagon and made his way to the kitchen. Though he was promptly told that the little 'rat' had not come back from bringing Kojmo his dinner. Mana frowned and quickly made his way to the other clowns wagon.
What happened in the few moments that fallowed Mana opening the door to that wagon would forever be blocked from his mind. He would ever allow himself to think about what would have happened to his little niece if he hadn't shown up when he had. All that Mana Walker knew and cared about was the other man was nothing but a bloody mess on the floor. That nothing was left of that blackness.
Mana stood over what was left of the other clown and fought down the need to chuckle darkly. His gray eyes narrowed and he dimly noted that the madness that all the Noah seemed to passes must be genetic…
Though that thought was in itself funny, as the Noah were genetic memories…
The old traveling performer turned and took the shaking girl by the wrist and pulled her from the wagon. He continued walking and didn't look back.
Mana Walker was nothing special.
He was nothing but a human that had a little bit of magic talent. His real talent was entertaining others. He was nothing more then a traveling Clown, who's brother happened to be the Fourteenth in the Clan of Noah.
They both carried the Noah gene and any children that they had would also have the gene. Mana was just a normal human, but he was not stupid. This little seven year old girl had the genes of Noah within her blood. His sweet little niece had Innocence within her left hand.
She was her parents daughter, plain and simple.
Mana was not a Noah, and he would never awaken as one. His gray eyes flickered to the thin little thing that he was pulling behind him. Ellen's sliver eyes still unfocused and unseeing and Mana was partly releaved at this. She wouldn't remember any of it. A child shouldn't have to live and almost experience such dark and black things…
Mana turned his eyes back to the road before him, his lips pulled into a straight determined line. A carriage past them on the old dirt road, but Mana didn't pay it any mind. He knew that the Earl would be looking for this child, for Neah's child. He knew that the Black Order would want another accommodator, another soldier of god, another weapon to use in thier war. It was a miracle that they hadn't found her already…
But he wouldn't let them take her.
His lips twitched at the corners, threatening to pull into a maddening smile. He wouldn't let this twisted and horrid war take the only thing he had left. He would keep Ellen from the war even if the price was his life.
Mana was a human, his brother a Noah. His sister-in-law an Exorcist.
But that didn't mater.
Mana Walker saw everything in black and white, his niece the only shade of gray. "Keep walking, don't ever stop…" he whispered under his breath. Fully understanding what would happen if he stopped now…
He was a performer and this would be his best performance ever. Mana Walker was a Black Clown, he would put on a show so grand that neither side of the war would see the small child fallowing just two steps behind him for what she truly was…
"Keep walking, until the day you die."
He would keep walking, one painful step at a time. He would keep smiling and pretend that he couldn't see the red that stained his path. Mana Walker was a simple human, a human that had simply taken in a stray little 'boy' that he had found and named 'Allen' one cold Christmas day…
"Don't worry Neah, Allen will be a great clown…"
A well dressed young man, looking to be no more then eighteen years old, stood just a little ways away from the main tent of the circus. His almond colored eyes half lidded as he stared at the patch of dirt before him. One of his white gloved hands raising and coming to rest over his heart.
"Tyki-pon~!" a happy sounding voice called out to him, and the young man turned to the one who had called his name. His brown eyes narrowing and lips twisting into a frown. The older man that approached him was dressed in a dark brown suit, with a black over coat hanging over his shoulders. His light brown eyes watching the young man as he walked up to him. "What are you doing way out here?"
Tyki shrugged his shoulders and turned his eyes back on the small mound of dirt. "I felt like I should here." He answered in a board tone, seeing no reason to lie to the Maker. He didn't know way he had felt the need to come out this way, there was nothing to see.
Just a shallow hole and a pile of dirt, with a small ball covered with dim yellow stars…
The middle aged man standing next to him smiled a little wider and nodded his head. He turned and started to make his way back to the tents. "I got what I came for, so we can leave at anytime.~"
Tyki narrowed his eyes and turned to fallow after the oldest of the Clan, his lips still fixed in a frown. What was that urge that had been pulsing deep in his heart? He had the feeling that this was where he needed to be, but he couldn't shake the feeling that whatever reason that he needed to be at this spot he had already missed...
The Third Child shook his head and focused on the older mans back. "Hey Earl, are you going to tell me why we came out here in the first place?" Tyki asked as they returned to their waiting carriage.
The Millennium Earl, in his human form, chuckled and sang out. "To move forward, Tyki-pon.~" Adam answered. "Chasing after something that we shouldn't have lost in the first place."
Allen kept her lips turned up in a friendly smile, but in all her fifteen years she had never felt such a pull. He sat on the floor between two middle aged men, the pile of her friends clothes next to him. She forced down the urge to shudder when his eyes finally turned from the cards in his hands to look at her through his thick pair of glasses…
She forced herself to not show how much his burning gaze affected her, Allen doing her best to shake the feeling that he could truly see her from her mind.
It felt like he could see through her deception, her mask.
It wasn't all that hard to push those thoughts away however, once she got the cards in her hands….
Yeah! Finished! Please review!
