Author's Note: One of the longer chapters (actually, I think this is the longest chapter, um). Please enjoy!
Chapter 2
In the end, I turn into a stalker.
I quickly figure out which class Kagami is in — he's not a hard person to find. With his bright red head and his rambunctious way of speaking, he stands out easily. His classroom is right across from mine, and often I'll try and peak in when passing.
Most of the time, he'll be sleeping, sometimes talking to what appears to be air.
During lunchtime, he often goes to the cafeteria to buy an insane amount of food, even though he always brings a bento with him (which he finishes in record time). Later, after classes, and during cleaning, he'll always speed through it as fast as he can so he can race to basketball practice. Sometimes, he'll get caught skimping on his duties, and someone has to chase after him, and ask him to do a proper job.
Of course, I'm not surprised he still plays basketball. In fact, if he didn't, I think my whole image of him would've been shattered. When I first met him, he seemed so full of life and so full of love for basketball and for playing it and sharing it with anyone he could.
If anything, I wish he could play for eternity.
And yet, I've never gone to see him play since I've been here. The gym has just been a few steps away, but I've never gotten the courage to visit their practices. I hear them in there, shouting and running about, shoes squeaking, balls dropping across the floor. The sound is enticing to me and sometimes I near the gym without realizing it — before I come to my senses and turn away.
For one, Seirin doesn't have a girls' team, so even playing basketball with him would be impossible. But, maybe — if I were to —
I clam the idea down, and keep walking. I walk past the gym. I walk past his classroom. And when I see him in the hallways, laughing loudly with a teammate, I'll walk past him without saying a word.
Two months has passed since I first entered Seirin and it's come to my attention that I have a problem. One that I can't really fix by myself.
I have a terrible case of crushing and every day it's getting worse. My brother used to say that people who hold back their feelings are no good and that they should always say what they feel. I thought his words flighty, but maybe I understand it a bit now. Maybe that's the way Kagami thinks.
If I can't fix this problem myself, perhaps I need to go to its source . . .
After months of being a pseudo-stalker, I've decided it's finally time to make my presence known. Or something like that.
So, after basketball practice ends one day, I wait outside, near the shadows. I'm hoping Kagami will come out alone — except he doesn't.
It's after a while, when I hear the basketball resound inside the gym that I realize he stayed late to practice more.
Well, I suppose that worked out well.
I straighten, gripping the straps of my bag, and prepare myself for — for something big, undoubtedly.
The door of the gym is cracked open and when I push it, it swings wide with a jarring noise that makes me cringe.
"Oh," a voice says. "Kagami-kun, someone's here."
I start. There was someone here besides Kagami?
It's the boy who's in his class, the one who always evades the eye. I should've known . . .
His eyes peer at me, a question on his face. Kagami turns from where he'd been dribbling and looks me up and down. His face is blank without recognition.
"What are you doing here?" he asks bluntly.
"Kagami-kun," the other boy, Kuroko, reprimands.
"Sorry," Kagami says. "I mean . . . do you need something?"
I feel frozen in place, my tongue heavy in my mouth.
Kuroko tilts his head, then says, "Is there something you want to say to Kagami-kun?"
I must've been staring at Kagami. I swallow. "U-uh, yes. I mean —"
Kagami looks at Kuroko like he's crazy, but Kuroko just nods, a quick tip of the head, and then he moves past me, saying, "Kagami-kun, I'll be leaving then. See you tomorrow."
"W-wait, Kuroko, hang on! You —"
But Kuroko's already gone.
And it suddenly falls on me that I'm alone with Kagami Taiga.
He runs a hand through his hair, spiking it up. Then he turns to me and I feel all my muscles seizing up. "Well?" he says gruffly. "What'd you want to say to me?"
Even when he's being impolite, there's a certain charm to him. Perhaps it's strange of me to think that. To think that his wild and bright hair is attractive, that his eyes which can burn holes into you are exciting. His height and build all tower over me, a girl who's already smaller than the average. He could probably easily crush me if he wanted to.
But I've seen his kindness, the way it flashes so brightly, and seems to consume him — and you — in that moment.
He squints at me now, like he's trying to decipher why I'm here. "Hey, aren't you that girl from before?" he says.
My heart leaps for a moment. Does he remember —?
"The one they almost pushed down the stairs."
And just as quickly, my hope plummets. I suppose it's too much to expect him to remember me after so long. I'm hardly anything spectacular, but he, on the other hand . . .
"Are you going to say anything at all?"
He's starting to get irritated.
I swallow. Clear my throat. "My — my name is Hashimoto Izanami." The words barely squeak out of my mouth.
"Oh. Okay. Nice to meet you, then. I'm Kagami Taiga."
Like I didn't already know that.
"I — I wanted to —" My cheeks are reddening as I speak and I realize I really had no idea what I was going to do once I reached this point. Confess to him? Tell him we once met as kids?
But he speaks before I can finish. "Hey, you wanna play basketball with me? If you don't know how, I can teach you."
It is just like last time. And he has no idea.
(Briefly, I wonder if he frequently offers to teach girls basketball, but then I dismiss the idea.)
"S-sure," I say. "And I — I already know how."
A grin splits his face. "Great! Since Kuroko left me, I have no one to practice with. Not that he's that great to practice with anyway . . ."
I set my bag down by the wall and roll up the sleeves of my uniform. Kagami is already dribbling the ball again, that wide smile still on his face.
"I'll go on offense first," he says. "And you'll be on defense. Is that okay?"
I nod, and make my way toward the hoop before leaning into a defensive position.
"All right, here I come!"
I set my eyes on him, ready for his move — but he's fast, faster than I anticipated. In one short moment, he's moved past me and dunked into the hoop behind me, leaving me stunned.
"Are you sure you know how to play?" His words are teasing.
I breathe in and take the ball he offers me. It feels smooth and comfortable in my hands and I do a few experimental dribbles as he gets into position.
Unlike him, I don't give a warning.
I dash forward, and when I pass him, I see his eyes widen. The basket is only yards away now. With this momentum, I can —
There's a flash beside me and then he's slamming the ball out of my hands. It ricochets through the court, but he doesn't go chasing after it. Instead, he's staring at me with a different light in his eyes.
"You're fast," he says.
"So are you," I reply.
Even after that brief movement, I am breathing hard — but I don't think it's entirely from the sport.
He is quite near me, still staring at me, and I don't think he realizes it. I step away and his eyes lose their focus a moment before snapping back to attention on me.
"I guess you are pretty good," he says, grinning.
I almost smile back, his grin is so alluring. I say, "I've played since I was a kid."
Since a certain someone introduced me to the sport and got me addicted with it, I want to add.
"Really?" His voice is laced with excitement. "Then we should play some more!"
And so we do.
Eventually, having forgotten my original goal, I say, "I should be headed back now. T-thanks . . . for playing with me."
"Oh, right." He glances at the time. "I guess . . . it's getting dark, isn't it?"
Wait, dark?
I panic and peer out the gym doors to find that it has indeed gotten dark.
We've been playing for that long?
"Is something wrong?"
His voice shakes me out of my thoughts and I swallow, turning back to face him and steeling myself for what I'm about to do next.
"U-um, do you — do you think that maybe you could do me a favor?" My hands wring themselves together and I can already feel goosebumps forming on my skin from the darkness at my back.
He blinks. "Sure, what do you need?"
"C-could you maybe . . . walk me home?"
For a moment, silence.
Then, "Yeah, why not? Where do you live?"
I let out a breath. He accepted and didn't question.
"Not too far," I say. "I hope it won't be out of the way for you."
"I don't mind," he says. "It's to keep you safe, yeah? Since it's dark out."
Well, that's not entirely the reason, but . . .
I nod. "Mom doesn't like me being out by myself after dark."
He stretches his hands over his head. "Understandable. Hang on, just let me get my stuff, then we can get going."
"T-thanks," I say, relieved.
A few minutes later, by some chance and stroke of luck, Kagami Taiga is walking me home.
I probably walk closer to him than is necessary, but every small noise and movement makes me jump, and I like the feeling of having him right beside me. The distance between the streetlamps seems entirely too far, and each time we enter the small space of darkness between them, I clutch the folds of my clothes and tense up, afraid the dark will swallow me whole.
Finally, Kagami says, "You're scared of the dark."
It's not a question.
"Is it that obvious?" My voice is quiet.
"If that's why you really wanted me to walk you home, you could've just said," he says.
"But . . . it's kind of stupid, isn't it?"
He shrugs. "It's not like fear is something we can control."
Somehow, the words calm me, and I feel my body relaxing slightly.
But then he continues. "I don't think that means you should just give into them, though. There are some things you can overcome, after all."
"What do you mean?"
"Well . . . you can't live your whole life living in fear, you know? Sometimes, you have to face them head on."
"And then what? Once you face them, they're gone?"
He gives me a sideways look. "No, probably not. But maybe, once you've faced them, and looked them in the eye . . . after that, you'll realize that you won't always be so powerless in front of your fears."
We walk a few steps in silence. "I never thought you thought about stuff like this," I say finally.
"It's not that hard," he says, almost a bit defensively. "Everyone has fears, after all."
"Some just a bit more than most," I say, letting out a bitter laugh.
"What . . . do you mean?"
I stop and as he does, too, his arm brushes against mine.
"I'm just saying . . . some people live in their fears and can't get out of them, no matter how hard they try."
"I think you're thinking about it the wrong way," he says, frowning. "Being afraid of something and trying to overcome it isn't something you have to do alone."
My breath catches. Because, for a moment, it almost sounded like he —
"I'll help you." The tone of his voice is decisive, like he'd made up his mind a long time ago. "I'll help you get over your fears."
I don't really know how to react to his words. Because he sounds so confident in them, like he didn't just offer something like this to a girl he barely knows. He sounds like what he's doing is an everyday occurrence. Overcoming fears. Maybe, to him, it is.
I smile. I say, "Thanks, Taiga."
He starts at the sound of his name, but he doesn't question it.
And I'm left wondering why I called him that.
A/N: Honestly, Kagami is pretty crush-worthy. I mean, he may seem kinda rough on the outside, but have you seen that smile? And he can be such a cute dork at times (though, admittedly, most all of the KnB guys are adorable dorks). Anyways, thanks for reading and thanks to those who have favorited, followed, and left reviews!
To a guest who left a review last chapter: Izanami's last name, "Hashimoto," contains the kanji for bridge (橋). Also, the word for water is "mizu," so I don't know, maybe that's what reminds you of river. :P
~ J. Dominique
