I see this in other stories so I feel obligated to include it too.
Warning: Alcohol consumption and the potential for a dangerous situation, but its obviously not. I wouldn't do that.
Drink responsibly.
Diaries of a Deckhand
Killian Jones was 20 when he first saw her, dark hair, dressed in reds and golds, buying herbs at the market. He'd been in the process of searching through a merchant's charts when he saw her.
She looked up and smiled at him, he blushed brightly, averting his gaze, trying to concentrate on the maps he was looking for, Oz, he was looking for one of Oz. The legendary place, few have seen but its existence had never been questioned.
When Killian looked back up, the woman was gone.
Killian sighed.
She's way out of my league…probably looking at someone else behind me…a woman like her would never look twice at a man like me.
She'd look at Liam if he was here and not stuck on that bloody island eating coconuts running away from the demon children. Killian looked back at the maps, Oz, if he found a way to Oz, legend had it he could find the ruby slippers and transport himself that way.
He could find Liam.
That night he dreamed of dark hair and kind eyes.
XXX
He hadn't meant to talk back, hadn't meant to be disrespectful, but his words had slipped before Killian had even realized it.
"You're tearing the sails!"
Liam's sails.
"Stop!"
Liam had bought them with him when he was ten, and the Captain was slicing them up because some wench said they were in her sun. He couldn't help it, it was disrespectful to the Jolly Roger.
But here he was, back at port with his back sliced up nearly as bad as the ship he had tried to protect, tried and failed.
Killian took an unsteady step forward, seeing the blood dripping onto the ground.
Just get away, somewhere safe, an alley, an abandoned hut. He told himself. The Captain hated when he got blood on the ship and in all honesty, Killian hated being seen after a particular bad night, he just wanted to slink away, lick his wounds before retuning, pretending that nothing had happened.
He spotted an alley behind a tavern, hard to see unless one was looking. He breathed a sigh of relief ducking against the wall, going as far back as it allowed, falling to his knees in this hidden area.
Killian didn't know at what point he fell asleep.
(Asleep sounds better then unconscious after all)
"Hey, sir? Come on wake up, are you alright?" Killian stirred. "How much have you had to drink?" Someone was touching him, hands on his head trying to get him to sit up. He gasped as pressure was placed against his back. The figure pulled away.
"Nothing." He said in a daze forcing himself to his feet. "Sorry, I'll go." He said instinctively. He'd have to find somewhere else to rest and recover. He took a couple steps before he suddenly felt light headed and he leaned against the wall for a moment, breathing deeply. He heard a voice far off before arms secured themselves around his arms, being careful not to touch his back.
Killian didn't know what was going on as he thrashed to get away.
"Hey, sir? Look at me." Said a voice directly in front of him.
Dark hair. Kind eyes. A smile.
"It's you…" He slurred before passing out completely.
XXX
Killian woke up on a couch on his stomach, he tried to sit up, but the simple movements made him cry out in pain.
"Hey, relax." Said a calm voice, a hand on his arm; Killian pulled away in surprise. "You lost a lot of blood, but you're stable now." They continued, not replacing the contact. He slowly eased and started making sense of the situation. She held a bowl of soup in her hands. "How about something to eat."
The dark haired maiden was sitting beside him. It appeared she had cared to his wounds, but that didn't make sense, no one ever cared for his wounds.
(Save for Victor and Elizabeth, but that was because of their debt to Liam.)
It had to be a trick. He had to get out of there. He rose to his feet mumbled a rushed apology, and a quick thanks before trying to rush out the door. However, Killian Jones was not that lucky. The kind sweet look on the woman's face turned stubborn as she grabbed him by the ear as he tried to flee.
"And where do you think your going?" She demanded. "I did not patch you back together just for you to ruin all my hard word mister. You are going to sit here, eat my soup whether you like it or not and recover, do I make myself clear?"
Killian, stunned was pulled back to the couch, sitting with his back away from the side, nodding dumbly. The brunette smiled, handing him the mug. "Good." Sweet expression returning.
"My name's Milah." She introduced.
"K-Killian." He replied.
XXX
It didn't take Killian long to learn a bit about the brunette. She was the town's healer, the most beloved maiden. She hated seeing anyone in any sort of pain, so when someone had a problem, no matter what it was, she did her best to solve it.
When she was around town, most did anything they could to keep her happy, to cater to whatever demands she had. She never took advantage of anyone, but when someone tried to be stubborn, tried to bully her in anyway, did anything that Milah saw as a challenge, the other side of her came out.
A fiery wrath that had any sane man scurrying to make her happy again, her tongue could rip a man to shreds.
In exchange, Killian told her some stories, mostly counting adventures from Liam, other times, the amusing antics Killian witnessed from the crew. Her eyes brighten and she laughs with that laugh of hers that one would confuse with an angel's singing.
It was no surprised to Killian, that after only a few days of staying with and conversing with her, Killian fell head over heels in love with her.
There was just a small problem, the beautiful enchantress was wed to a brave knight and had a 10 year old boy, Bae.
So when his wounds are healed enough, he bids goodbye to Milah, expecting a polite reply and perhaps some warning about falling into the harbor (his explanation this time about his injuries).
"Killian?" She asks hesitantly, holding his hand with both of hers. "Next time the Jewel is in port, would you please visit me?"
In the back of his mind, Killian wonders if it's appropriate for a married woman to seek his company, but in that instant he doesn't care.
"Of course." He says like a promise, watching her eyes as he leaves.
He must have imagined the longing in her brown eyes.
The next time he visits, he brings her a story of traders trying to take advantage of his captain, of how they threatened him with the Queen's name and it made them give the Captain whatever they wanted. He gives her a package of rare spices and herbs he managed to procure as well. She smiles and welcomes him inside for dinner.
The following time he visits, he has a broken arm and a story about slipping on the mop. He had broken the wooden creature he had purchased for her.
The visits soon begin to mesh together to the point that he forgets how many times she's greeted him, just that she smiles every time and occasionally hugs him. On occasion her grip lingers a tad longer than expected, other times they fall asleep talking on the couch and he has to hold her so she won't fall off.
He tries to be a gentleman, but he's found it become more difficult as she looks moe beautiful under the light of the moon
It occurs to him that in all his visits, her husband is never around, never present. At first he had worried, worried that he'd find him there in his home with his wife in potentially improper situations.
But he is never confronted, he never even hear the man's name.
He asks her one day, as he teaches her to play dice as his brother taught him.
(With loaded die)
Her grin disappears, tension reaching her features, she clenches her fists so tightly they turn white.
"He's out." She says simply, curtly. She obviously doesn't want to talk about it.
He visits her dozens of time in the following months, enough times to finally earn the luxury of meeting her son, her Bae. She hadn't wanted him to meet the boy as he didn't like being around her patients.
(Apparently there were a lot of them)
"But you're not one of my patients, at least not just one of them, you're my friend." She insists. It brings a smile to his face because even if he cannot act on his feelings, his feelings of being hopelessly in love with Milah, at least he can be her friend.
It's enough for him.
"Bae, this is Killian." She says. He looks at the boy in his clean nice clothes his long dark hair and the suspicious look he was giving him.
"Why's he dressed like that?" Is all the boy can say, arms crossed.
"Baelfire!" Milah lectures, Killian chuckles.
"I'm a sailor." He replies. "This is what we wear." The boy shrugs, telling his mother some excuse about how the tutor wants him to read some book. Killian knows a thinly veiled excuse when he hears it, but doesn't take offense. He'll take whatever Mialh and her son have to offer him, whether that be an acquaintanceship or even friendship.
It's more than he has, more than he's had in nearly a decade.
XXX
He's on his way to visit Milah again when he hears it, quite muffled sobs. It makes him stop in his tracks as he looks around for the source of the sound. It comes down an alley, sitting on a box, a boy curled in on himself crying his eyes out.
"Lad, are you alright?" He says hesitantly. The boy jerks his head up, looking right at him. He recognizes those brown eyes anywhere. "Bae?"
The boy quickly wipes away his tears. "I'm fine." He mutters. "Perfectly fine!"
He's not fine, but he doesn't look physically hurt.
"Bae? What happened?" Killian asked. "Or at least, if you don't want to tell me, how about I walk you home so you can tell your mother?"
He shakes his head stubbornly. "I don't want mom to know." He eventually spits out. "It'll just make things worse."
Killian's not sure what to do, so he simply sighs, pulling himself up besides Bae on the box. "Alright lad, your call, tell me what you want me to do, besides leaving here all by your lonesome." He tells him.
"I don't know how to sword fight." He admits. "I should know, my dad is legendary with his sword, but I can't seem to get it right." He admits. "The other kids started picking on me when I messed up, asking how I could possibly be my father's son if I can't do it right."
Killian sighed in understanding. He thinks back on his last time holding a sword, when he held it and tried to fight off the Captain's men. It had been a failed incident, but Killian remembered at least the basics.
"Then lets fix it shall we?" He asked. "If I may?"
Bae looks up wide eyed as Killian picks up a stick from the ground, handing it to him. "I'm a bit rusty, and I don't have a sword of my own, but how about I show you what I know and we go from there? Can't have these lads picking on you eh?"
He sees a slight smile on the boy as he whipes away his tears and holds the stick in a clumsy stance.
"Alright, widen your feet ok now…"
XXX
He walks Bae home after a couple of hours of practicing and he seems more hopeful than he had been before, thanking him dismissively before rushing to his quarters to study. He arrives just in time to see Milah crying on the couch.
Killian's reaction is instinctive, hand on her shoulder, asking what had happened, what was wrong.
"Another month! He's going to be away for another month!" She wails, pulling herself into his chest. It surprises him, but he wrapps around her stroking her hair, trying to get Milah to calm herself. "I love him Killian, but he's never around anymore, all he cares for is his position in the army, what about Bae? What about me? If that man's not too careful I'll…"
She stops, hand over her mouth, apologizing under her breath,
"I shouldn't be doing this feeling this…" She mumbles.
"Doing…feeling…what?" He barely has the courage to ask. He doesn't dare hope.
"I shouldn't be falling in love with you." She admits as she kisses him, softly but surely.
"Just as I shouldn't have fallen head over heels in love with you." He admits once the tender embrace ends. "I'm sorry Milah, we shouldn't be doing this, you're married."
She nods in agreement.
He advises her that in a month, when her husband returns and she has a long chat with him, to ask him to show his son how to wield a sword properly.
Milah agrees to that.
XXX
He doesn't see her again for another 3 months, wanting to give her space and wanting to get over her, but every day without her feels more painful than the last. It just so happens that when he turns 21 in her village, the crew rallies around him. He finds drink after drink in his grasp.
"Come on lad, have a drink! Be one of us for the night! Stop your moping!" They holler practically dragging him inside, much to his conusion. These men had barely said two words to him without a scowl or a shove. Killian found their sudden friendliness rather alarming.
But Killian was never one to look a gift horse in the mouth. He took the drink, looking at it carefully.
"Don't tell me it's your first drink sailor!" Sneers a voice. It makes Killian's blood go cold as he remembers the familiar voice, and the dark full beard.
"N-No sir." He says simply. The man's friendly enough and it seems he doesn't remember him. "But it's my first drink with…" He looks back at the joyous crew members. "My mates." He settles on. He takes a hesitant sip.
"That's not how it's done lad!" The man bellows, making him flinch and the amber liquid slosh in the glass. He takes his own glass and swallowing it in one foul swoop. Killian hesitates before mimicking his motion.
Why not?
The crew lets out a howl of laughter as he takes another, and another.
Before long, Killian can barely see straight, he's mumbling and the things that come out of his mouth…its bloody strange.
"You were right mates, the deckhand does make for a good source of entertainment." He recalls…someone saying, he feels someone push him into someone.
When had he gotten up?
"Killian! You're here! Your…drunk." He hears a woman say. He nods.
"Birthday!" He says with a drunken laugh. "Did you know Liam gave me a wooden sword for my birthday? Now I've got lots and lots and lots of ruuuuum!" He finds himself losing his balance, swaying like he was on the Jewel and it was in a frightful storm.
"Storm! There's a storm, that's why I can't stand you know lass?" He tells the woman. "You might need a coat for the storm." He warns her. He can make out dark curls from his drunken haze.
"How much have you had to drink?" She asks, righting him, he suddenly finds himself sitting in a chair.
"Drink? Why would I drink? We're on a Navy ship!" He laughs. "Liam would hate it." He tells her. "Liam Bloody hates the Navy." He flinched at the word, trying and failing to bring a finger to his lips, a shushing motion.
"Don't tell him the Jolly's a Navy ship now." He tells her.
She sighs, he suddenly feels a hand on his head, lifting his head up, she's looking at his eyes.
"Oh sweetie, you're past drunk aren't you?" She said softly. He shook his head.
"Don't want to brood no more." He admits. "Is that what it's called, that's what they call it. I call it nurseing a… nurseing a …" He couldn't find the word.
"Broken heart!" He said with a laugh. "Fell in love with someone I shouldn't have." He tells her, bopping her on the nose. "But it's a secreeet." He warns.
She laughs.
"Ok Killian, come on, lets get out of here." She says, pulling him up and leading him out the door. Her gentle touch on his shoulder.
She shakes his head. "Bad form to take advantage of a woman." He states. She just laughs, as he sags against her, his steps are unsteady, but she wraps her arm around him, steadying him.
"What if I wanted to take advantage of you Killian?" He chuckles. He can feel her tense, can't quite make out her face, but he can tell she frowns at the way he laughed. Killian couldn't help it.
"Why not lass? Everyone else takes advantage of the bumbling Deckhand? Why not a beautiful woman?" His laugh is dark, only matched by his despair and utter hopelessness.
"Killian…" She sighs. "I wish you'd remember this when you woke up."
He remembers her opening a door, laying him on a bed, his head in her lap, fingers through his hair. He sighs in contentment.
"Well lass? Going to have your wicked way with me?" He prodded. She didn't answer him, just continuing her movements, they were calming and relaxing.
Killian barely realized when his eyes had fluttered shut, and he'd drifted to sleep in this strange woman's home.
XXX
He woke up with a headache to rival the dead. It burned and throbbed and everything was so bright, his sleeping quarters on the Jewel were never this bright.
He moved his hand, feeling cloth rather than wood. His eyes snapped open and he practically jumped out of his skin. He was in a home. Someone's home, worse, he was in a bed. He shivered.
Killian had no recollection of being here, a thousand thoughts ran through his head. Had he attracted someone's attention? Had he disgraced his name even more, bedding an unmarried woman? How far had it gone? How much had he drunk?
He was staring at the bed when he heard a voice behind him. He jumped whirling around, eyes wide.
"Milah? What? How? Did I? Did we?" He can hear the slur in his voice, he's still on unsteady feet and can barely hear over the pounding in his ears. He presses his face into his hand to try to bring some instance of relief but finds none.
At least until he feels her hand on his shoulder leading him back to the bed. He resists, wide eyed and terrified. The last thing he wanted was to have bad form with Milah, and here he was in her bed chambers.
"Shh." She murmured. "Its ok. You had too much to rink last night. I'm surprised you haven't gotten sick."
He gives a soft smile.
"It's a Jones thing. We get wasted, we get intolerable, but Jones men don't get sick from good rum." He says proudly, head hitting the pillow as he let out a content sigh. "I'm never drinking again." He sighs, again trying to sooth his pounding headache.
"Especially with those cretins, trust me Killian, you should only drink with people you trust." She informed him in a lecturing voice she usually only used on Bae.
Usually.
"How much do you remember?" She asked, sitting on a chair besides him, holding his hand as he closed his eyes. He was so tired.
"Not much, just starting to drink and then meeting a beautiful lass and then…nothing." He explains.
"I went to the tavern as I usually do, and found you stumbling around, the men were picking on you, teasing you, engaging you in a conversation when it was obvious that you had gone too far. They were even trying to talk you into taking a swim." She explained.
Killian didn't remember that.
"I convinced them that I was a bar wench and I wanted to take you home to uh…for some entertainment." Milah blushed heavily at that.
"I remember you saying you would take advantage of me." He whispered.
"Killian, you know I would never-" She said suddenly eyes flashing with fire e recognized. He shook his head.
"I know love, I know." He insisted. "Thank you for looking after me" He says. Even after he'd crossed the line, after she knew that their feelings would do nothing but cause her strife, he still took care of him. Milah was an angel.
"Killian, will you do something or me?" She asks.
He nods. "Anything."
He expected something along the lines of: 'Disappear and never come back.' Or 'stop complicating my life.'
Instead, he got: "Tell me, are those men the ones who hurt you?"
He flinched, denying instantly, it was an automatic reaction.
"Tell the truth. Killian, please."
Killian sighed and nodded. "Captain likes to keep us in line you see, and, and, the crew sometimes likes to remind me of it, that's all, its no big deal Milah." He says quickly, seeing the horror on her face.
"I knew it!" She screeches in blind rage. "After how they were talking to you, treating you! After what you said, I just knew!" She practically roared. "I'm going to go march down there and give them a piece-" She had turned, starting to storm out of the room, but Killian was quick, getting to his feet, and catching her arm.
"Don't." He said sternly. "Milah, I'm serious." He insisted.
"Why do you go back there? If the Captain and the crew abuse you, because this isn't some form of discipline Killian, its straight on abuse." She demanded.
"Its Liam's ship." He admitted. "I have to protect her."
Her eyes softened as he told her about Liam and how he'd been captured on the Jolly, he'd been working ever since to bring him home.
"Then why not leave? Continue your search. I'm sure your brother would understand that you can't be risking your life over a few planks and some sails." Milah insisted.
Killian smiled softly.
"It's home."
She approached him carefully, placing her hand on his arm, guiding them both around her waist ans placed her own on his face.
"Killian, please, don't leave again." She begged in a small voice. "I've been thinking everyday about what happened, what we said. And I've come to a conclusion."
Killian's face was pink, body stiff, but he didn't let go of her, the beautiful Queen who wanted to be held by him.
"I don't love my husband. I haven't for a long time. I want you." She insisted. "Stay here with me." She begged.
He faltered. "I can't." He said softly. "Not yet. I need to find Liam first. Once he has his ship back, I promise you love, I'll never leave your side."
She smiled, leaning up and kissed him.
Their first kiss was desperate and needy. This was something else, something lighter and brighter. It made him love her more for the way he felt holding her.
"Promise me you'll always come back."
He grinned. "As long as you're here waiting for me." He replied.
XXX
He kept his promise.
After they buried her, many years later, he never came back.
Drink with people you trust, that's all I'm saying. Not my best work, but I like it just the same.
My favorite one-shot is the next one.
A little MilahxKillian teaser, which isn't always favored in fanfics, but in canon and in my story, I think their relationship is very important. Its a defining moment to both of them, I don't always like when certain stories depict Milah or Neal so villainous. Even though its usually fun to read sometimes.
Share your thoughts...
But anyway, its been more than a week between posts, sorry about that. I got sort of stuck at a part, but then I decided "Hey, you know that way you carefully planned and organized what's going to happen for the last 5 chapters? Lets do something completely different!"
And after what I just wrote...when I post it in 20+ weeks, I may have to go into hiding. (beware of chapter 20) sorry, just excited rambles.
On a side note, when I write, I use stars, the symbol besides the 8, to have sort of a scene break. I've just discovered that fanfic no likey, now I'm wondering if i used them in Freeing the Witch. uggggg. I used so many in the sequel. taking them out is going to be soooo annoying.
Guest Reviews:
andria: Backstory is important, I usually think of everyone's backstory before i even dabble with including them. So I'm hoping to include more backstory and side story one-shots. Hope you like this one too.
This isn't getting as much attention, which I totally expected, but I'm going to keep writing it anyway, helps me keep from getting writers block and to organize my thoughts a bit.
Next: Letters Home
~Luna
