Order of the Phoenix

A/N: MAKE SURE YOU"VE READ CHAPTER 2; I GOT NO REVIEWS FOR THAT- yet?

Chapter 3: Hang on Tight, Baby, Cause This Train is Taking Off!

Freakishly Annoying Narrator (FAN): Merusa and Emma decided to do a small time skip 'cause they couldn't figure out how to write the wrath of the Weasleys. I get to fill you in. There was some yelling and screaming, than it was accepted. They went to Diagon Alley- surprise, surprise- and have now just settled into their compartment on the train.

Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny: *settles down in seats, and begin to talk about Quidditch and the upcoming year*

Harry: Blah blah, blah blah blah blah.

Ron: *jumps to feet in mock outrage, and points at Harry* Blah!

Hermione (Mione): *eye roll*

Ginny: *eye roll*

FAN: Suddenly, the compartment door opens. Our heroes jump to their feet and pull out their wands- jump to your feet and pull out your wands!

Heroes: Oh! *jump to feet and pull out wands*

FAN: As I was saying, our heroes jump- oh you know what they do. It's Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle at the door!

Harry: Malfoy.

Draco: Well, well, well, Potty and the Weasel.

Crabbe and Goyle: *snicker*

Ron: *raises an eyebrow* Didn't you say that last year?

Draco: *ignores him, and notices that Harry has an arm around Ginny with a delighted squeal* Potter's got a piece of arse! To bad it's the Weasel's slummy little sister!

Harry: *glares, points wand at Malfoy's nose* DESAUGEO!

FAN: Uh...why isn't anything coming out of the wand?

Merusa/Emma offstage: *exchange glances* The special effects crew took the day off.

Everyone else: WHAT?

Crabbe (who is really quite intelligent, he just plays an idiot): How do you except us to act out the scene? Do you think the audience will IMAGINE the sparks coming out of the wand?

Merusa/Emma: Just try it.

Everyone: OK.

M/E: ACTION!

Draco: Rictusempra!

Harry: *stumbles backwards and gives very forced laughter* Ha. Ha. Ha. *falls to knees* Ha. Ha. Ha.

Ginny: This isn't working.

M/E: And we're skipping to the Sorting Hat.

Everyone: Huh?

M/E: Take five. Skipping to the big hat scene. No specials. *to the audience* Actor lingo.

Everyone: Ahhh.

M/E: Move it, because as far as we're concerned, this chapter is FINISHED.

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Author's Note: Sorry for the delay, small case of writer's block!