Pallet School Adventures Chapter 3 : A Lesson of Shapes


After forty four long days later, I finally get enough inspiration to update this fanfic. So, it is awesome, and really does not follow the plotline, but... eh. Enjoy !


Ash - 5 - does not like school ; likes Gary

Gary - 5 - does not like school ; likes Ash , and hates the teacher

Axletia - 5 - very dominant ; has a big crush on Gary

Carid - 5 - likes school , and is a brainiac ; does not like the teacher

Teacher - pretty old and ugly


" So, what do we do about Miss Hartford ? " Ash asked.

" I say we burn the bitch, "

" Gary, you can't solve all your problems by burning stuff, " Carid said. " Look what happened when you burned Fluffy ! "

Axletia stood next to Gary. " Fluffy was weird, anyway. "


(Flashback : A few days ago :

The four kindergarteners stood outside of Ash's house with Fluffy, who was his dad's Persian.

" Uh, Ash ? " Carid inquired. " Are you sure Uncle said we could play with Persian ? "

Ash rolled his eyes. " We call him Fluffy. And Mom and Dad have been having issues lately. So... yeah. Just another way to see Dad turn red ! "

Gary snickered. " Hence his name ! "

Ash pulled out Fluffy from the kitchen table. Gary tied him up , and Axletia took out a match.

" Okay. We have about ten minutes before Ash's dad comes, " Axletia explained. " So... Gary. Do your thing ! "

Gary grinned as he struck the match against the weird Persian, and it immediately started to get burned. The whole group started laughing, and Gary continued to grin. " That will teach Fluffy not to pee on me ! " Gary sneered.

Suddenly, Gary was picked up by the collar and he met the furious eyes of Ash's mom. " Gary ! How many times do I have to tell you not to bring matches over to my house ? You're going to get banned from here one of these days ! Now, be a good boy, okay ? "

" Yes, Mrs. Ketchum. "

Ash's mom grinned. " Now, let's give Persian a bath ! "

The kids squealed in delight.

End of flashback. )


" Yeah, your dad was ultra mad ! " Gary said, snickering. " He gave a funny talking to with us ! "

Ash and Gary sighed in content. The four kindergarteners were standing inside the classroom, eating their snack of Oreos. The boys had finally went back to school after three days of " suspension " .


One day ago...

" This is awesome ! " Ash whispered. " You should cuss at the teacher more often, Gary ! That way we'll get uspended more often ! "

" Ash, it's suspended, " Gary corrected. " And how long do you think we have to stay here before Fluffy comes and betrays us ? "

Ash gave a small shrug. " I dunno. It's been about... I think three days. And Mom thinks we're still going to school. So... I really don't care. "

Suddenly, very fast and angry footsteps were heard. Ash quickly managed to pee his pants.

" Okay. We're busted, " Ash muttered.

Gary kicked Ash where it hurts. " Dag, yo. "


So now Carid shook her head. " You two are weirdos. Why did you guys suspend yourselves anyway ? "

Ash shrugged. " Principal Fairydust was on beer. And we tried to stay away from school for a week, but one day Mom got this darn paper thingie and the next thing you know, she and Dad , along with Gary's dad , was standing outside of our closet. Miss Hartford snitched on us ! "

" So now we have to have revenge on her, " Gary added.

Axletia gave an evil grin. " Can I help ? "

Gary rolled his eyes and gave an agitated sigh. " Whatever. Just be quiet. "

The kids stood in silence until Miss Hartford finally decided to show up, her high heels clacking in a military - like sound. She drew a crappy circle on the board, and gave a toothy grin. " Does anyone know what shape this is ? " she asked.

Gary raised his hand, and Miss Hartford scowled at him. " Okay, Mr. Oak. What is it ? "

" It's you when you had your sixth miscarriage ! " Gary replied, grinning.

Ash peed his pants, and somebody raised their hand. " What's a miscarriage ? " she asked.

Gary took a deep breath. " When a mommy and a daddy love each other very, very much, the man does some sick things with his fireman. Nine months later, the mommy has a baby, and a whole gob of blood. Sometimes, if the mommy drinks too much, the baby becomes so retarded that it decides to leave the mommy because they hate her ! So, that is my lecture of what a miscarriage is, and where babies come from ! "

Suddenly, seventeen kids rushed to the bathroom. The only ones that stayed were Ash, Gary, Axletia, and Carid. Miss Hartford glared at Gary, and also at Ash, who was making farting noises. She put a square up to the board. " And what shape is this ? " the old woman cackled, pointing at Ash.

" Your mama ! " Ash declared proudly.

Miss Hartford threw her ruler at Ash. " THAT 'S IT ! I AM CALLING YOUR PARENTS ! " she screamed.

Ash grabbed Miss Harford's knees and started crying and peeing on her. " Have mercy, Lady Teacher ! Dad will kill me ! "

Miss Hartford just smirked. " I would love to see that . "


Freaking ouch, man ! I did not say Ash's dad's name in this fanfic, but if you want to guess, it's okay with me. Until next time... bye !