Chapter Three - Hanging On

Teal'c stepped out of the wormhole without sparing a glance at the marines pointing weapons at him. He hurried down the ramp, handing over his staff, and immediately disappeared through the now open blast door.

He reached the infirmary in a matter of seconds, having taken the stairs in his haste. O'Neill was leaning against the wall; standing next to a closed door that Teal'c knew led to an observation room.

"How is Colonel Carter?" he asked his commander, who looked like he had aged ten years since he had last seen him.

"She's… in a coma. They're bathing her… making her comfortable," Jack replied listlessly.

At Teal'c's tense silence, the general continued to explain. "The structure came down on them. Many of your Jaffa died, but some survived. Jacob is hanging on, but… they say they think the symbiote… Selmak… is dead."

"What are Colonel Carter's injuries?" the Jaffa prodded when his friend fell silent.

"Internal bleeding, injured liver, four broken ribs, concussion, broken arm, cuts, bruises. It seems she covered her head with her left arm, otherwise she'd be dead."

"She will survive," Teal'c stated categorically.

"They're not sure. I guess the liver trauma is serious, and she was bleeding internally for a while," Jack responded.

"She is strong. She will survive, O'Neill," Teal'c repeated, placing a large hand on his friend's shoulder. "You should get clean so that you can be with her when they are done. I will stay here until you come back."

O'Neill glanced down at his uniform as if for the first time realizing that he was covered in dust; then he nodded and silently walked away.

A few minutes later, two nurses came out of the infirmary room, followed by Dr. Brightman.

"Doctor," Teal'c greeted her.

"Teal'c, where's the general?" she asked.

"He has gone to change," he replied, but his eyes questioned the physician.

"I assume he explained about the colonel's injuries," she said.

Teal'c nodded. "He is concerned about Colonel Carter's liver injury. I assured him that the colonel will survive," he responded.

"We all hope she will, Teal'c," she agreed with a nod. "The CT scan revealed that she had stopped bleeding by the time we brought her in, so we did not have to perform surgery. We're trying to drain the abdominal cavity and replenish the blood she lost, but she's in critical condition." Then she added, "You can go in and see her. Tell the general when he returns that he can stay with her as long as he wants. Talking to her won't hurt. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some other patients to attend to."

Teal'c bowed as he watched the physician disappear down the corridor; he then pushed the private room door open and stepped in.

Colonel Carter was lying on the bed looking frail and battered, her blonde hair still damp from her recent bath and her face marred by a few cuts and bruises, but the swelling was not bad. Her left arm was heavily bandaged and held against her body in a sling, and she was hooked up to too many monitoring machines and tubes. Most prominent was the blood bag hanging behind her bed. Teal'c understood the need, but he always associated such contraptions with impending death, and he hated seeing his friends attached to them.

A middle-aged nurse was still in the room, making notes in a pad, and she smiled when he bowed in greeting. "We're monitoring her pulse and blood pressure, but I'm done. We will be back later, and we'll continue to keep an eye on her from up there," she informed him, pointing at the glass window overlooking the room.

The woman then gave her patient one more concerned glance and left.

The Jaffa silently stepped close to his team leader, gently taking her hand and marveling, as always, at how small and delicate it was. Colonel Carter was always so strong and capable that he rarely acknowledged how truly fragile she was as a human female, but her frailty was hard to ignore now.

"Colonel Carter, you must listen to me," he began.

GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

'Teal'c?' Sam thought, her mind lost in a dark fog devoid of the intense pain she remembered suffering only seconds ago. The gentle, deep voice of her old friend soothed her senses even further, and she paid attention to his words.

"We have defeated our adversaries. We are, at last, victorious, and our struggle has ended. It is time to reap the benefits of victory, to rebuild, and to reclaim our lives and our loved ones. It is time to live our dreams."

'Victory!' Yes, she remembered.

"Nothing stands in our way any longer. The sacrifices of the past were painful but necessary. They are needed no more."

'Yes, no more.' She was tired of sacrifices, of struggle, of frustration.

"It is time that you allow yourself your heart's desire, and that you become one with your true love."

'Jack!'

"It is a time for rejoicing and healing. O'Neill needs you."

'He needs me.'

"He will not heal without you, and he will certainly never rejoice again if you leave him. You both deserve happiness together; therefore, you must fight and survive."

'Together!'

Yes, she wanted to survive. She wanted to finally taste happiness in Jack's arms. She wanted to wipe out the bitterness he seemed to dwell on; she wanted to see him smile again.

Sam tried to open her eyes, to squeeze the hand that held hers, to respond in some way, but she just couldn't. Blackness was claiming her again, and her friend's voice gradually faded.

GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

"T," Jack said as he entered Sam's room.

"O'Neill," the Jaffa responded. "She is still sleeping."

The general nodded, not trusting himself to speak. He had retreated into survival mode, utilizing as few words as possible and relying on his capable staff to keep the SGC running. His sole concern was for the woman lying on the bed before him.

"I will leave you with Colonel Carter. I will visit Jacob Carter and return later," his friend said; then he silently left the room.

Jack pulled a stool close to the bed, where he could sit and hold Sam's right hand as he stared at her battered features, willing her eyes to open.

She was so beautiful! She was always beautiful, even when covered in blood and grime. His heart never failed to swell with pride when he looked at her, so powerful and magnificent even in her darkest moments. His body could never refrain from responding when he witnessed how she handled herself in battle, as tough and lethal as any male warrior, and his heart could never avoid melting when he saw pain and anguish reflected on her delicate features.

He looked down at her slim fingers as he played with them, gently caressing her bruised hand and forcibly pushing back the fear that threatened to overwhelm him. He had to remember that they had gotten her out in time, that she was alive and breathing, and that she was a fighter.

Glancing again at her beloved face, he slowly brought up her palm to his lips and held it there, closing his eyes and inhaling her scent, his mouth warm against the fair skin he had long desired to taste. He kept her fingers pressed to his cheek as his eyes opened again, tears threatening to fall.

Sudden movement above him distracted him, making him lower Carter's hand to the bed, and he noticed that a nurse was quietly walking out of the observation room.

Well, that was awkward. He knew that he had not said anything compromising, but the woman had certainly seen the despair written all over him as he kissed his Colonel's hand. He had no doubt that the grapevine would be distributing this latest bit in no time.

He wondered whether Sam's heartfelt declaration inside the tunnel had already made the rounds, but he just could not seem to care. He didn't care about barriers and rules anymore.

His attention returned to the face of the woman he loved with all his heart, the one he was terrified of losing, and he made a secret vow.

When Sam recovered, he would give up command and retire. Nothing would keep them apart anymore. She had said she loved him. Maybe he could claim her back. Maybe it wasn't too late.

It was time to start living again. There was no one to listen to his words now, except the woman that needed to hear them, so he softly spoke to her.

GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

Sam felt the warm kiss caressing her palm, the pressure of calloused fingers holding hers, and the wetness of tears as her fingertips grazed thick lashes. Jack.

His scent caressed her senses, making her heart soar. He was with her again. He was back.

She struggled to resurface from the depths of darkness, to move, to make some kind of sound, but she could not.

'Jack! I can feel you next to me!'

Then she could hear him.

"Carter, I know you don't belong to me. I know that I have no right to ask you this… but… I need you to live."

'I want to live.'

"Even if your happiness lies with someone else, and even if all I ever have is your friendship, I need you to survive."

'I need you! I don't want anyone else.'

"I don't want to live knowing that you're not there."

Sam desperately tried to respond, to squeeze her fingers around his, but her body refused to respond.

"Everything we ever did for this planet would mean nothing to me if you're gone. I mean that. I would not want to live without you. What I said inside that room years ago still applies. I'd rather die than lose you, Carter."

'Oh, Jack! I want to live for you. I want to be there for you!'

"I love you, Carter. I've always loved you. I could never stop."

Sam felt joy flood her soul, but her body remained motionless, unresponsive to Jack's caresses.

"I'll do anything you want me to do, Sam… anything at all. I'll be here for you in any way you want if you just beat this. I promise you anything you want."

'I want you,' she whispered in her mind, her senses again relinquishing her tenuous hold to reality. Then blackness slowly sneaked up on her again.

'Jack! Stay with me!'

GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

"O'Neill," Jack heard his friend's deep voice call from the door, making him hastily wipe his eyes dry and gently release Sam's hand. Then he turned to face Teal'c.

"I must speak to you," the Jaffa informed in a grim tone, making Jack's heart freeze with dread.

He stood and exited the room, facing his friend in the corridor once he closed the door behind him. "What is it, T?"

Teal'c's face was drawn with sorrow, his eyes holding Jack's worried gaze with sympathy. "Jacob Carter has expired."

Jack did not visibly respond to the unexpected announcement, but he felt blood draining his face as he stood frozen in the corridor, his heart twisting with grief. He just stared back at his friend silently, willing himself to regain his composure.

"I am sorry, O'Neill," Teal'c finally said, his gaze dropping to the floor.

"Yeah," Jack at last was able to verbalize. "Me, too."

Telling Sam about her father would not help her condition. He hated the blows fate had decided to deal Carter at this time, a time when she should be rewarded, not punished.

Just as he was about to go back into the room, he saw the slim form of Agent Kerry Johnson approach from the end of the corridor.

Crap! He had completely forgotten about her! This was going to be awkward.

"Jack! I just heard about General Carter. I'm so sorry!" Kerry said as she came to stand very close to him, her hand landing on his arm, which made Jack's body stiffen in discomfort. He casually took a step back, creating a little more distance between them.

Teal'c, clearly sensing his uneasiness, bowed lightly and walked away, leaving the couple standing alone before the infirmary room's door.

"How is Colonel Carter?" Agent Johnson asked with sincere concern in her tone.

"She's in a coma," Jack replied.

"I'm so sorry!" Kerry said again.

"She'll pull through," Jack responded with conviction he was far from feeling.

Kerry gave him a concerned look, then tried to step closer, obviously worried about him, but Jack again stepped back.

"We'll talk later. I want to be there when she wakes up," he said. Then he gently patted her shoulder and went back to Sam.

Kerry just watched him disappear behind the infirmary door, her intelligent brown eyes missing nothing. She then nodded and went back to her temporary office.

TBC