Disclaimer: I don't own anything obviously!
A/N: Well, I'm back, it only took how long, writers block sucks ass.
The light from the Great Hall danced shadows on the wet grass as Hermione walked up the lawn towards the gigantic oak doors. Her footsteps were dogged with indecision, doubts playing games with her mind. Facing the other students, she reckoned, would never be as terrifying as her mother "that day". This was the sole driving force behind Hermione's slow uneven steps. The only thing she looked forward to was the beginning of classes, and her warm four-poster bed. Classes would become an escape route for all that had happened, and bed where she would spend all of her free time.
As for Harry and Ron, Hermione couldn't even think of them now. Her mistreatment of them, Ron in particular was an open wound in her stomach, a dull ache reverberating somewhere around her heart. She had purposefully ignored them this summer, opting to spend time with Char, ignoring their urgent letters, Harry's constant 'We are AT WAR' she dutifully pounded out of her mind with alcohol. Ron was a delicate issue, how could she tell a man that obviously loved her that she couldn't love him back, that is wasn't in her make-up. 'Maybe, just maybe' Hermione thought intently as she squelched onward in the twilight, 'we can pretend all is as it was before, maybe they won't need to know, chin up Hermione, smile big and you'll fool 'em all.' With her decision firmly in place, her footsteps sped up, her back straightened and the enormous stone steps crept ever closer.
Closing a petite feminine palm on the bronze plated knob, Hermione gave the oak door a gentle push, praying it wouldn't squeak. Silent as a whisper the door slid open, warmed air rushed out with the sound of voices, laughter and the smell of food. Hermione smiled for the first time in what seemed like years, but had only been days. 'Home' she smiled wider at the thought.
Quietly Hermione stepped onto the warm luscious marble. Her footsteps consumed by the sounds of the Great Hall as she crept slowly forward. Trying with all her might not to attract any attention, Hermione slid quietly along the stone wall, her nails creating a faint click click as they passed across the rough hewn wall. As the warm light bleached Hermione's face she closed her eyes and leaned away. Opening her eyes, she glanced at the head table, there Professors seemed unaware of her. 'Thank my lucky stars' she smiled, heading towards the Gryffindor table.
"Ah Miss Granger, so glad you arrived safely, I'm going to have a word with Hagrid about the Thestrals" Dumbledore's quiet murmur cut through the massive hall, his eyes twinkling as she turned to look at the Professors table. The chatter had all but died, and all eyes were glaring at her. Flinching slightly as the questions blazed through her and a whispery conversation began, Hermione straightened her back, pushed her head down towards the floor, and muttered "Sorry".
"Ah my dear that is unnecessary, it wasn't your fault , you're here now, no harm done. I suggest you go sit next to your friends though, looks as if he may launch out of his seat in a moment, and we don't want that." Dumbledore chuckled merrily as Hermione glanced back at Harry and Ron, they both smiled and waved at her, Ron in particular looked eager to see her. Her gaze then slid to Ginny, someone who she was generally happy to see, her best girl friend. Smiling at the sight of the petite redhead, Hermione headed quickly to the Gryffindor table, her spirits lifted.
Throwing herself into Harry's warm hug, Hermione smiled wider, she was home finally. Sitting on the bench, she turned to Ron, her eyes careful not to meet his loving look. Quickly he smothered her in a hug, Hermione cringed at the length, but pushed him off with a laugh.
"Ron, Ron, RON, let me go, I can't breath," Hermione laughed as he sheepishly turned away.
"Sorry Mione, I just, I missed you," he murmured, cheeks competing with his hair. Hermione smiled then, a pang of sadness flitting over her features,
"S'okay" she said with full conviction. Turning to the vast table, Hermione started to load a plate full with salad and chicken, glancing up a Ginny with a wink, the knowing smile of we'll talk later.
"So Mione how was your summer? We missed you at the burrow." Harry questioned, eyebrows raised.
"Ya Mione where were you? I never even got a letter!' Ron exclaimed, 'and look at your hair! Why is it so dark?"
Hermione just laughed at the questions,
"my summer was okay, sorry I didn't write, I just had loads of stuff going on. I ended up studying mostly. It was boring, but my parents seemed happy to have me home for a change." The lies came easily, almost to easy, and suddenly Hermione wasn't hungry anymore. 'Why can't I just fucking just tell them the truth, their my friends they will support me. They have to right? These guys are my family.' What she didn't tell them was that her summer was the summer of Char and Hermione, that it had been a drunken stoned haze, that she smoked cigarettes, swore like a sailor, and partied hard. They didn't need to know that Hermione had been this way for years, that she put her hair down every chance and liked to keep it that way. Mione was for school, days at the Burrow, fighting the war; Hermione was for all the after times.
She couldn't eat the chicken in front of her anymore, pushing it around in minuscule circles. She could feel the boys next to her taking her answers as 'typical Mione'. Yet Hermione could still feel eyes on her, looking up quickly, she saw Ginny staring at her plate, watching the small neurotic circles the fork made. "Later" Hermione mouthed quickly, and Ginny just nodded, their unspoken girlish agreement. Hermione went diligently back to her chicken circles, drifting off.
Hermione's mother waited politely outside the door for Hermione and Charlotte to get dressed. As they did neither spoke, passing glances and small giggles, touching hands briefly. Once both had dressed, composed themselves, Hermione reached for the door. Issuing Charlotte out first, she didn't see the note Char slipped onto her bed, nor would she until that night.
Hermione's mother stood in their way however,
"Now my dear…Charlotte is it? Your leaving, now, don't come back, ever!" Hermione's mother screamed, grabbing Char's arm and pulling her towards the door.
"No mom! Don't do this! I love her!" Hermione yelled, yanking on Char's other arm.
"Hermione, go sit in the study, we will talk about talk this later," it wasn't the words that stopped Hermione cold, it was the tone, and the look. She had no choice but to be the dutiful daughter once again.
"S'okay Love, I'll be back before you know it," Char winked, and Hermione had never pegged her for a liar, but in that moment she doubted her. 'I love you' Hermione mouthed, Char just nodded before the door was slammed in her face.
"Mom!" Hermione screamed,
"What, honey, what? You don't want that, that is for those freaks down the road, but let's not talk about this anymore, how's some breakfast sound?" Her mother smiled briefly before moving past Hermione into the tiny kitchen, the only telltale sign of her true emotions was the vicious banging of pots and pans. Hermione sighed before shuffling into the kitchen.
It was only later that night when Hermione collapsed into bed that she saw the note from Char. She opened it and the tears started to fall. Clutching her pillow tightly, Hermione felt her heart fall on the floor, watched as it flopped and lay still.
Love,
I'm sorry, but I can't be with you anymore. Your leaving for school and I know it just won't work. We had fun. Please forget about me and go be happy, go meet other girls. I will miss you, you were best friend.
Cheers,
Char
xxxxxxxxxxx
A/N: Well, there you have it...the third chapter, its moving slow I know...patience my pretties for there will be more.. as per usual..its M for a reason, lesbian, and there, so just fucking deal!
