Chapter 3 redone.
Chapter 3: Pancakes
Tsunade woke up that morning with a personal mission to figure out how to undo the forbidden jutsu that led to the future children being here. Though the scroll was placed in an obvious spot, it was not placed in an area that it could just wander into the hands of a genin, she thought with distaste as she sat at her desk, scroll in front of her.
Dispelling the seal that protected the contents, she let out a soft gasp to see that a note was attached to the parchment. It was her job as the hokage to keep up with the scroll and make sure no one opened the scroll, yet clearly someone had opened the scroll and read through it. As she finished she let out an irritated groan. She need some sake.
"Wake up dad."
Naruto heard the voice, but he just ignored the command.
So Mai tried again.
"Dad, wake up!"
But yet again, Naruto continued to ignore the voice. Seeing that her attempts were futile, Mai left the blond and decided she could make breakfast while allowing her dad a few more moments of rest. She walked out of the bedroom and headed towards the kitchen to prepare them breakfast.
"Over the years, with the help of many cookbooks and lessons from Iruka-sensei, I learned to cook."
Mai could remember her dad telling her during a cooking lesson that if he weren't a ninja, he would have loved an opportunity to be a great culinary or pastry chef. Mai went into the small kitchen and after fishing out the flour from behind the cartons of ramen, she was finally ready to start making pancakes. She hummed a quiet rendition of Sadness and Sorrow, to herself. It was peaceful, only with the occasional cracks of eggs, and soft snoring of her dad.
Mai checked the time to see it was only about 10, and her dad still wasn't awake. The skillet was heated and the batter was perfect, so three at a time she poured in round blotches of the pancake batter, flipped them when the sides started bubbling, and then put the perfect pancake on a plate. Thirty minutes and twenty-one pancakes later she was finished with the buttermilk pancakes. She went to the table to set it up for two. Syrup, butter and the pancakes were all ready. All she needed was the blond. She turned to go wake her father up once more, but didn't have to when she saw the older man in the small hallway, laughing.
Naruto was having a dreamless sleep, when the sunlight woke him up. He really didn't want to wake up, but when he got a whiff of something cooking, he got up. He got even more excited when the smell he'd smelled were pancakes. He pulled on a t-shirt and went to walk out to see if Mai would give him pancakes, because he really didn't know how hungry he was until he smelled pancakes.
He stood in the hallway watching Mai for a while, just thinking. He didn't mind the fact he'd have a family one day, but with Sasuke? Naruto never pictured the Ice Cold Sasuke Uchiha as a family man. Ha! With a mental picture of Sasuke trying to at least hug someone, nonetheless a child, he burst into fits of laughter causing Mai to look at him.
"Dad is weird…" Mai thought, as she looked at her dad laughing for no apparent reason.
"Nothing is that funny." Mai said in a serious tone causing Naruto to stifle his amusement.
Mai rolled her eyes and went to sit down.
"Are you going to grace me with your presence for breakfast?" Mai said sarcastically.
"Sure." He said with his amusement at bay.
Naruto settled down in his chair and looked at Mai. He still couldn't get past how Mai looked so much like him. He stared as she piled pancake after pancake, after pancake on her plate. Trying to break the awkward silence, well at least awkward for him, he tried to start a conversation, with a little joke.
"If you eat all those pancakes, you'll get fat." he said, with a chuckle.
Clink!
Mai's fork fell onto the floor. Her eyes turned from calm, to rage, and her eyes were now set on Naruto, who wiped his smile off his face.
"Did you just call me fat?" she stated with an icy tone, which caught Naruto off guard.
"Eh?" Naruto thought in confusion.
"I know I'm a bit bloated, but fat?" she said in exasperation.
Trying to calm the girl down he stuttered out a 'No, you're not fat.', but Mai, was hysterical and in her own world.
"I am NOT fat. I know I am NOT fat. Oh my word! Dad thinks I'm fat!" she wailed to herself.
Naruto got up to move around the table to calm Mai down, but threw the man right off, sending him crashing into the wall, leaving a big crack.
"Oh shit! She has Sakura's strength! Plus she isn't controlling her chakra." He thought, while rubbing his throbbing head.
Naruto saw as Mai got up so fast, it sent her chair through the window, and the table with all of it's contents into the living area, leaving quite a mess. Mai, through her tears, ran into the bathroom, leaving Naruto wide eyed at his now ruined apartment.
Fifteen minutes later, Naruto was in agony and during the moments of his agony he realized a few things.
1. Girls don't like being called fat, even if it was a joke.
2. He really needed to pee.
3. And finally, that girl just ruined his apartment! It now smelled of syrup and butter.
Naruto was in one hell of a predicament and this caused his mind to start wandering to a topic he really didn't want to think about.
"I wonder if Sasuke is doing better with his twin."
Sasuke was enjoying the silent Sable, who was currently munching on a piece of toast. Sable wasn't silent all morning, but after her shower, she was pleasantly silent. By the way she had her face in deep concentration, he knew that she wanted silence and Sasuke was more than happy (on the inside) to oblige. So there they ate their simply breakfast of eggs, toast and bacon Sasuke had prepared, in silence.
Sasuke looked at the girl. She still had her shoulder length hair in a part over one eye, and he was still getting used to the striking resemblance. He wanted to ask Sable a lot of questions, such as what he did in the future, how he looked, and most importantly, why the hell did he marry Naruto, but he was never one to initiate a conversation, but since the answers were too tempting, he decided to against the norm. Yet at the same moment Sasuke opened his mouth, Sable spoke for the first time during breakfast.
"Can you go to the store for me?" she asked in all seriousness.
Sasuke narrowed his eyes slightly in suspicion.
"Why can't you go yourself?"
"I have no money." She answered simply.
Point there.
"What do you need?"
At this Sable blushed.
"I-I need some feminine products." She said softly.
Sasuke let out an inaudible sigh. Sasuke wasn't embarrassed to actually go buy the items; it was the fact he'll probably have a bitch to he'll have to endure for the next five days or so.
"Fuck." he thought.
"Fine." He answered getting up, which caused Sable to smile brightly.
"Oh and can you get me some chocolate?" she asked.
"Whatever." He said looking for his money pouch.
"And can we go get ramen at Ichiraku's for lunch?" she added, remembering the fact she needed to meet her sister.
Not wanting a crying girl he muttered another 'whatever' and headed out the door. Sable went back to her peppy self and started humming jovially while clearing and cleaning the dishes she and her father had used during their breakfast.
Naruto really needed to pee. It's been thirty minutes...Thirty fucking minutes!
Well, at least he got Mai to stop crying. She was actually fine really. She was taking a shower now, and the running water wasn't helping Naruto's condition, so he tried to clean up his apartment to get his mind off needing to use the bathroom. While scrubbing the syrup off the floor, after throwing all the broken items away, Mai called out from the bathroom.
"What is it?" he inquired, noticing the shower wasn't running anymore, making his condition easier, but actually using the bathroom would help him better.
"I need you to go to the store for me." It wasn't a question, but an order.
"O-okay." He replied, taken aback a little.
"I need some feminine products." She said coolly.
"Huh?"
"What are feminine products? Are there masculine products? " he thought in confusion.
The first thing Naruto did when he got to the store was use the bathroom. After that he went down the aisle that said 'Feminine Products'. Naruto looked down at the list he wrote down.
One package of pads. Regular
One box of tampons. Regular. Plastic.
Naruto busy looking at his list ran into someone. Being a ninja, one was trained to have excellent reflexes, but Naruto completely threw that concept out the window, and landed flat on his butt.
"…Idiot…" said an arrogant voice.
One that could only belong to Sasuke.
"What are you doing here, bastard?" Naruto asked getting up and rubbing his backside.
"Shopping." He answered and went back to picking out a box, then turned back to the blond.
"What are you doing here?" Sasuke asked.
For a while it seemed as if the blonde wasn't going to tell him, but then...
"Mai wanted some things called pads and tampons." He answered looking at the various brands on the shelf.
Sasuke cocked an eyebrow.
"You do know what they are used for?" Sasuke asked.
Naruto turned towards Sasuke.
"Hmm…I guess the pads are used to protect something, but I have no clue what a tampon does." He answered truthfully.
Sasuke was shocked at the moron's answer. After those years with the perverted sannin, the study of the male and female anatomy at the ANBU prep course, Kakshi and Sakura, Naruto didn't know what pads and tampons were.
"So you never knew why Saskura was a bitch during a certain time of the month?"
Naruto glared at his team-mate.
"Don't call her that! And besides...isn't that your girlfriend? Do you enjoying fucking a female dog? I didn't know you were into bestiality, bastard." Naruto replied hotly.
Sasuke glared at the shorter blond, who grinned at his clever comeback.
"If one knew what bestiality was, one would also know what a tampon is, unless, you were too intrigued with bestiality to notice." Sasuke replied back, before turning at Naruto's fish look.
Sasuke grabbed the list in Naruto's hand, looked over it and then went out to throwing two packages at him.
"Did you know the best way to get information is to read?" Sasuke said before smirking and walking to the cashier.
"This is going to be entertaining" Sasuke thought as he walked towards the check-out line.
3…
2…
1…
"OH FUCK!" said a disbelieving Naruto.
Sasuke smirked when he paid for the items. He found it highly amusing.
Naruto walked with his bag in hand towards his apartment and couldn't get his mind off what he just read, since being angry at Sasuke's comeback made him angrier. He was not intrigued. He only knew because of when Ero-Senin was giving him a very in-depth "sex talk", did he know what bestialilty and because of that talk, he started tuning out his mentor since he was shuddering at the perverted things people do with...things. But still, Naruto couldn't fathom the idea as to why women put plastic up…there? Shuddering for a quick moment, he continued on his way to his apartment, when in the distance he saw Mai walking towards him.
"Hey! I was just heading back." He said once they met.
"Oh thank you." She said giving him a smile.
"Let's go get some ramen." She added, after grabbing the bag.
Naruto wasn't the one to deny a ramen trip, but he was worried about his apartment.
"But the apartment is still a mess." He said.
"Don't worry about it. I cleaned it up while you were gone."
"Umm…" but didn't finish the sentence, when inhuman strength started dragging him in the direction of Ichiraku's.
Sasuke and Sable were already eating their ramen when Mai and Naruto came through the curtains of Ichiraku. Sable went to sit next her sister, leaving the only unoccupied seat next Sasuke.
"Miso-ramen please." Naruto said to the old-man as he settled himself on the stool.
Mai and Sable chatted animatedly, while Sasuke and Naruto sat in awkward silence. They have yet to talk about the 'kids' thing and sooner or later Tsunade was going to pester them into moving in one or the other's home. Plus, the twins wouldn't like being separated and there was the issue them being married, having children, being happy to together, having sex…
"How did two guys have sex anyway?" Naruto thought.
He knew the basic concept for a man and a woman, but how did he and Sasuke…This caused Naruto to blush.
"…dobe!" cried an irritated Sasuke.
"Huh?" he asked in utter confusion.
"Your ramen." Sasuke said, and indeed his ramen was in front of him and his face was dangerously close to touching it.
"And you're blushing." Sasuke pointed out, which caused Naruto to turn a deeper red.
"I—I—" but was cut off from an explanation from a loud thunderous clap of lightning, a scream and then Sasuke falling on him, crashing his lips with Naruto.
A/N: Help me, help you. Please point out any mistakes you find in a review, so I can fix them and hopefully make other's reader experience better.
Reviews are not required, but are appreciated.
