Nyctophilia

Chapter 3

WARNING: This chapter was not beta read; I merely proofread this.

NOTE: Haru is Lucy. She will be called like that whenever it's Jellal's point of view, but when it comes back to hers, she will be Lucy once again. Sorry if this might confuse you.

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Fairy Tail, Hiro Mashima does.


He sat down on the bed, feeling the soft sheets under his fingertips and listening to the shuffling of Haru's feet on the wooden floor. He couldn't tell what time it was already, but he knew that it was night because of the air that drifted through the windows. It was cold and it made him shiver just a tad bit. It was always cold during the night.

Their little adventure outside the inn was somewhat terrifying but it was pleasant in some ways. He still needed to go out a bit more often though if he wanted to get used to the feel of people walking beside him and so that he could train himself to sense if there was something in front of him. But it was hard. Like earlier, if he had known that Haru was in trouble... if he had known that she needed his help he would've—

What? What could he have done? He was blind for fuck's sake. He couldn't see a goddamn thing. So how would he have been of help to Haru? He couldn't just march up to the guy and punch him. He was sure he would even miss his face.

He hated this so much. He hated being useless and weak. He wished Haru could see that, but she was caring for him too much and he appreciated it, really, but his pride was being crushed by a woman he didn't know about. A woman whose name he had no knowledge of, whose face he had yet to see and will probably never see. He was being treated like a child, being guided all the time.

However he knew that if she didn't help him, he would look even more humiliating. He wouldn't know what to do, wouldn't know what to say, wouldn't know where to go. If she hadn't arrived in his life, he would have died in this room, waiting for a miracle to happen.

So he was still grateful, despite of the pain that he felt for being unable to do anything. He was grateful because she wasn't getting tired of him, because she was patient with him. He could feel her kindness emanating from her whenever she was near him, and could feel the pulse of her magic. Her magic—it was like light. Or perhaps it was. He didn't know. He probably would never find out unless he asked her.

He heaved a sigh and raked a hand through his hair. He heard her footsteps stop and then resume as if she had looked at him for a moment and then continued on with what she was doing. What was she doing?

Before he could even ask, though, she was already speaking.

"You! You snuck this in my bag, didn't you?"

He leaned back a bit, startled. Was she talking to him? It didn't sound like she was facing him. So who was she talking to?

"You left without saying a word! I placed that lacrima in your bag ages ago. You forgot, didn't you?"

He furrowed his eyebrows. There was another woman speaking, but her voice sounded a bit like static. He guessed Haru was speaking with someone using a communication lacrima. How convenient. How terrifying.

He heard Haru groan. "I'm fine, okay? I'll be back soon."

His blood ran cold.

"I know for sure that you are referring to months rather than days."

He waited, the silence unnerving.

"You know me well."

He released a breath he didn't know he was holding and swallowed hard. Whoever Haru was talking to, he didn't like her. She sounded chirpy and too loud for his liking. And it sounded like she wanted to take Haru back home. He didn't want that.

His eyebrow twitched. What in the world was he saying?

"You need to come back home, idiot. They're looking for you! They already have an idea as to what you're doing, where you're at and why you're doing this."

There was another pregnant pause, one that he didn't like. It was deafening and although it was short, it seemed as if it was taking forever. It was the kind of silence that made you want to scream in frustration, the kind that made your insides twist with anxiety. It was the kind of silence that he experience while waiting for Meredy to return. It was a silence that made you hope for nothing. It was horrible. It was deadly.

"I'm not coming back until I finish what I started," Haru said at last. Her voice sounded sad to him and he wondered why.

"You can't just decide that—Hey... is that... on the bed... is that...?"

He tensed, suddenly feeling Haru's eyes on him. Her friend noticed? What was he going to do now? Hide? No, he couldn't do that. There was no furniture in the room that could hide him, and even if there were, it would be pointless. She had already seen him anyway.

He fisted his hands. "Who's... that?"

"No one, Jellal."

His eyes widened out of shock. He also heard her friend gasp. He couldn't believe it, she even used his name so casually... what was the other girl supposed to think? He could feel his heart race in worry and in nervousness. He wished he could see the expression on Haru's face, to know if she was mad at him for speaking.

"Wha—Why are you with him?! I knew it! You took off to save him after all! You're not supposed to do that! God forbid, they'll imprison you!"

He lowered his head and gritted his teeth. So he was putting her in danger just by being with her?

"They won't find us. We're going to leave this town tomorrow and look for another place to stay."

He jerked, surprised once more. They were leaving tomorrow? He didn't know that. Did she plan that all along? Or was that decision made on the spur of the moment? Who was she talking to? Why so many secrets?

She seemed like she was saying Haru was in danger. Well, actually she was. She did say she would be imprisoned for helping him, but if Haru knew that, then why was she still here with him? He was beyond confused and he wanted to ask her what was going on but she was still busy talking.

"Bah! Whatever! You decided this and I've known all this time that you would have left to help him anyway! Fine! Just don't get caught, got that?"

He swore he could hear the smile in her voice. "Got it."

"I'll contact you again in a week. Bye!"

He heard Haru bid farewell to her friend before everything went still. He frowned, cocking his head to the side. He knew she saw him do that, so why wasn't she saying anything? He sighed and crossed his legs on top of his bed, choosing his words properly.

"You... didn't tell me you were in trouble," he said finally, nibbling on his lower lip. "If I had known... I wouldn't have taken away all your time."

"Silly Jellal," he heard her say, her voice laced with mirth. "I can handle myself just fine. Don't worry, I know what I'm doing."

"Your friend didn't seem to agree with that," he told her, his lips tight.

"She's always worrying about me," Haru said, sounding sad. He heard her sigh. "Ever since that day..."

He went quiet and fiddled with his fingers. He knew he had no right to question her about anything concerning her life, but he wanted to know. He wanted to know what her intentions were, why she was helping him, why she was here. He wanted to know a lot of things but he couldn't bring himself to ask her, anxious that she might leave him if he tried. He was afraid that she would find him too nosy and would just walk away and never come back. Like Meredy.

He heard her chuckle and felt her hand ruffling his hair, her cool fingers massaging his scalp and staying there. Strange. When did she move to sit beside him? He didn't even sense her. "You shouldn't worry too much for a stranger, it's unbecoming."

He flinched, his body turning rigid at the recollection of what he had said before. He clenched his jaw. "I... Earlier I said we were strangers but... I was mistaken. You're no longer a stranger, at least not to me."

"Oh?" She sounded hopeful.

"Am I a stranger to you?"

She released a shuddering breath. "You never were."

His head shot up, surprised. He turned his head towards the direction of her voice and reached out, trying to hold onto something. His hand landed on something soft and silky. Realizing that it was her hair, he moved a bit to the side. His heart raced in his chest, pounding in his ears and driving him insane. He stopped at the curve of her bones, cupping her cheek. And that was when he realized something.

This woman. She was crying.


She froze as his fingers touched her wet cheeks. She didn't know when she started crying, but before she could even jerk back from his touch, he had already realized that. Biting back a sob, she looked into his unstaring eyes. They didn't meet hers, that was for sure, but he was facing her like he wanted to look at her. Like he wanted to see her and meet her gaze for the first time.

She leaned away from his hand and wiped the tears streaming down her cheeks. He looked troubled when she did so and he dropped his hand back to his side, his knuckles white. She rolled her shoulders and pounded a fist on her chest, hoping to get rid of the tension although she knew it wouldn't work.

"Why are you crying?" he asked her, his voice lower than a whisper, like he was scared to ask.

She could at least try to lie. "I'm not—"

"You sound like you're okay, but your cheeks were wet," he cut in, his lips tugging down into another frown. "And you smell salty."

She flushed and covered her face even though she knew he wouldn't be able to see her anyway. "Ah, I see."

"Was it something I said?"

She blinked and allowed her hand to fall on her lap. His eyebrows were furrowed and his lips were pursed. Clearly he was nervous. "No. Well, yes but," she paused, seeing his face contort into terror, "But it's not anything bad," she finished with a smile.

"Really?" He asked, still looking troubled.

She giggled and leaned back, supporting her body with her arms. "Yes, really."

The crease on his forehead stayed and she huffed, reaching over and pressing on the space between his brows until the crease went away. He seemed surprised. "Now then, I wasn't originally planning on leaving until the day after tomorrow or the day after that but, we've been discovered, unfortunately. We'll leave first thing in the morning."

"We're taking the first train?" he asked, head cocked once again to the side.

Lucy sighed, pouting. She was glad he couldn't see her. "We have to leave soon if we want to avoid a clash. I'm sure they're on their way to catch me now as we speak."

He blinked, confused. "Are you a criminal?"

She stared at him for a moment and laughed, falling back on the bed. "We're both wanted people but not in the same way. I was under house arrest before I came here. It seems that they finally found out that the "me" at my place was a clone. Took them long enough."

"You can create clones?"

She hummed in thought. She could tell him that it was one of her spirits, but that might give away her identity and she didn't want that. It was a good thing she was careful with her words. "Not exactly, but let's just leave it at that."

She was met with silence and she stared at him fondly, a smile gracing her lips. For a moment, she forgot all about her worries. "You've been asking so many questions, Jellal," she pointed out, grinning when the said man turned pink.

"Sorry. It's just that, after your conversation with that girl... I can't seem to stop worrying. All these questions just keep coming one after another," he told her, eyes casted downwards. She wondered for a brief moment whether he did that out of habit or just because he wanted to.

Then she frowned. She knew how that felt. Thinking all the time. Trying to look for answers when no one would give her any—it was a sick feeling. It haunted her mind all the time, never giving her time to rest, never giving her space to think about something else. It was always there and she didn't know how to get rid of it. She didn't know how to calm down.

Looking back at the bluenette beside her, she closed her eyes. "I know the feeling," she murmured, remembering the time when she was always restless.

She laughed bitterly and looked at him. "It's a horrible thing, isn't it?"

He gave a smile that was just as rueful as her laugh. "It is."

She went quiet and stared at the ceiling, her gaze distant. "We're probably going to travel a lot from now on," she told him, shrugging. "I hope that's okay with you."

"It's okay, I'm used to it but... why?"

Her breath hitched, somehow very excited. "Well, we're going to look for a cure of course. I know those eyes of yours can still be fixed and I'm going to find a cure even if it's in the hands of Zeref himself."

Suddenly she felt his hand gripping her shoulder at an awkward angle and she turned her head towards him. Jellal was breathing heavily, his eyes wide with fear and his body trembling with anxiety. She swallowed thickly and waited for the bluenette to speak.

"Don't you ever say that again," he managed to wheeze out, still out of breath. It was almost like he was having a panic attack. "Zeref's dangerous. I don't want you to get in trouble just for me. Just don't... say that again."

Lucy's heart fluttered in her chest and she flushed. "What the... I'll be fine, Jellal. He won't hurt—"

"Don't even say it. Please, Haru," he begged, his grip on her tightening. "Just... don't say that again, okay?"

She stared at him in surprise and at the same time, awe. She had never seen someone (a stranger no less) that panicked before. And she hadn't seen a look like that aimed for her in a very long time. With a shaky exhale, she gave in. "Alright, alright. It was a joke. A bad one, but a joke, okay? I'm sorry."

A relieved smile broke out on his face. "Just refrain from saying that again."

She rolled her eyes. "I'll try," she told him, shrugging. "But I can't promise anything."

Jellal nodded and they remained silent for a while. She eyed the man in front of her, watching, waiting for a reaction. But he seemed content with the tranquility. She didn't blame him. With all that was happening, he probably still needed to think even though it scared him because sometimes it could act as a distraction. Sometimes it could be a cure to all the madness.

She hated thinking. She hated it to the point where she wished she could just stop. But on days where she needed it, on days where she missed it, on days when she was alone, she craved for it. She wouldn't stop thinking. It was like a love-hate relationship. Sometimes she hated it because it created problems that were never there to begin with. And sometimes she loved it because she could imagine things in her head, because she could think about her dreams and ambitions.

But right now, thinking wasn't what she had in mind. She didn't want to worry about the consequences. She didn't want to fear the danger that was lurking in the future. Hell, she didn't even want to think about the possibility that Zeref really had the cure for Jellal. She wasn't lying though when she said that she would still take it even if the dark mage itself had it—she really would. But how far would she go? Would she actually die for him?

Probably, if it ever came to that. She was set on helping Jellal ever since the opportunity rose anyway. Nevertheless, the thought of dying, the thought of laying down her life for someone who didn't even know her that much, and the thought of giving everything up just for one man, it scared her. She wasn't supposed to be scared; she knew it could happen. She knew that if she actually had to fight Zeref until her heart stopped, until her soul flew out, she would do it. Because it was for Jellal. Because it was to help him.

Was that frightening? Yes. Which was why she refrained from thinking about it. It gave her confidence, although it was temporary. She had already thought about that before she even came to Amari, while she was on the train. She came up with a lot of possibilities that gave her chills, that made her want to scream, but she didn't mind. If it could help someone, if it could lift someone's spirit, then that was fine with her.

She sounded suicidal. Maybe she was. She sounded like she wasn't even doing this for herself anymore. That was partially true. Her original intention was to help Jellal so that he could help her realize things she couldn't understand. That was still her main goal. But earlier, just seeing the man so helpless, so vulnerable, so full of agony, it made her want to help him for him and only him instead.

But that wasn't what she was supposed to do. So she was going to push that thought back into the depths of her mind and stick to her original goal: to help herself. It made thinking a lot easier, knowing that it was to ease her confusions away. It really frustrated her though because she was selfish. She was doing this because she yearned for attention, because she wanted to be needed. She might have sounded like she was doing all of this for Jellal, but there was a darker truth to that and this was it.

Although like she said, she had strayed from that. Perhaps meeting this man was going to help her after all. More than what she had originally planned. Further than what she thought. And she felt relief, knowing that he could help her with not just her needs but with her character as well.

She almost wanted to cry because of him. She was so thankful. So very, very, very thankful.

Ridding herself of her thoughts, she was brought back to reality. She looked at Jellal and noticed that he too was trying to stop himself from thinking too much. With a smile, she stood up and stretched her arms above her head.

"You hungry?" She asked, facing the bluenette on the bed.

He gave her a nod. "Are you cooking?"

"Yup. Want anything specific?"

"Fish," he answered immediately, sounding very excited.

She frowned. "I didn't buy any fish, sorry. You should have told me earlier when we went out."

His face fell in disappointment. "Oh."

Her heart clenched painfully, seeing that look of dismay in his eyes. There she went again, letting someone down. She told herself she would never do that again but she failed. She bit her lip and looked at the time. It was pretty late already and she knew she shouldn't go out at this time of the night but...

"Wait here," she told him as she got her wallet from her bag that was on the floor. "I'm going out."

She saw him jolt forward and felt his hand tugging her shirt. She pretended she didn't notice and walked away from him, holding her pink wallet with her teeth while she tied her hair into a ponytail. When she was finished, she took the thing in her mouth and headed for the door.

"Haru, wait! Let me come with you!"

She chuckled and stepped out into the hallway. "I'll be fine. Fish, right?"

"No! I'm fine with anything else. Just stay! It's dangerous!"

She heard him hyperventilating, his feet thundering on the wooden floor as he raced to reach her. She stared at him for one more time. "I won't be long," she told him, the door closing behind her.

"Wait, no! Haru!"


A/N: Been a while since the last update :) Were you confused about the Haru thing? Sorry, it would be weird if Jellal called her Lucy in his own point of view so... You know what? I'm surprised that three chapters are already up and they're still about one day. The next one might still mention some things, but they'll also be boarding the train so yeah. Please forgive Jellal if his feelings confuse you. He doesn't know whether he wants to treat Lucy/Haru as a stranger but he's finally made his mind hihi. And about Zeref having the cure, who knows? Can you guess who Lucy was talking to? It was pretty hard trying not to say her name while I was writing this.

If you have any questions or if you just liked the chapter and would like to leave me a heart-warming comment, please review below :) I also write drabbles and one-shots on my tumblr, so check the link on my profile. I also draw fanart there :D

"The inside of my mind is a place where even I wouldn't want to reside."

Byee! -Anne :D


- Please support/read my other stories: Celebrity Issues, The Devil and the Assassin, Fragile, Life's Challenges, Forgotten Memories, Queen of Stars, A Love That Lasts Forever and Going Against The Current.