Chapter 3: The Secret

He asked too many questions now and she tried to be honest with him, but every question scared her to death. What if he remembers? What if this is how I lose him again? So she told him just enough and never enough.

Sometimes it was worse, knowing her secret. Before when she'd disappear he'd simply be in a bad mood for the rest of the day, never dreaming that the super-heroine risking her life each day was his Marinette. He found himself glued to the television, to the ladyblog, to anything that would tell him that she was safe.

Sometimes she came home elated, sometimes exhausted. The worst nights she came home bruised or bleeding and he would carefully help her to bandage up her scrapes, silently cursing his own helplessness.

Tonight was a bad night. He'd seen her on the television again, smiling in victory but her hands clenched a little too tight. A forced smile that he knew all too well. He pulled out the first aid kit before she even got home and checked his phone every few minutes, hoping for news. Within a few minutes it chimed.

Marinette 9:23pm: Can you come pick me up?

Adrien 9:23pm: Where are you?

Adrien 9:24pm: Marinette?

Adrien 9:26pm: Mari, where the hell are you?

He grabbed his keys and sprinted for the door, heading for the place where he'd seen her giving an interview just a few minutes prior to her text. He left the car in a spot that was certainly not legal and looked around.

She was tired, probably hurt, she needed a place to hide, to transform out of sight... quickly. A small dark alley caught his eye and he ran, lighting up the space with his phone's flashlight.

There.

At the end of the alley, Marinette was crumpled against the wall, her tiny red kwami dancing around her face nervously.

"Marinette!" He rushed to her side, shoved his phone in his pocket and moved to lift her. He felt something warm and wet. "God, she's bleeding. What the hell happened out there, Tikki?"

"I'm sorry, Adrien," Tikki said quietly.

He slipped one arm under her knees and the other around her back and gently lifted her from the ground. Mari's eyes flickering open blearily and she groaned.

"Shhh, It's all right, bugaboo, I've got you."

"Chat?" Mari whimpered, "Oh thank God, mon chaton, I thought I'd lost you." He glanced down at Tikki who suddenly refused to meet his gaze.

"I'm taking you to a hospital, you're going to be all ri-"

"No hospitals, chaton. Home. I just want to go home."

He'd already reached his car by now and he set her gently in the passenger seat. It didn't take long for them to reach home but she was out cold again before he lifted her from the car and hurried inside.

"Tikki, get the key from my pocket," he ordered and in moments the door was open. He kicked it closed behind them and laid her down on the couch, grateful that he'd pulled out the medical supplies before he'd left.

Darting to the kitchen, he grabbed a kitchen towel and hurried back to her. He pressed it to her side where most of the blood seemed to be coming from and held it fast until the bleeding began to slow.

"She can't keep doing this, Tikki," he chided as he pulled out bandages from their kit. "It will kill her. One of these days, it will kill her." Once he'd bandaged and cleaned her up as well as he could he'd nothing to do but wait. She wasn't unconscious, nor was she entirely awake. She seemed to be in a daze and he found himself worrying that she'd hit her head.

"Mon chaton," Mari whispered again, and Adrien's jaw tightened.

He paced back and forth in their living room, doing his best to wear his path into the carpet. "I should take her to the hospital," he grumbled after what seemed like hours of listening to her mumble mostly incoherent nonsense to her dead partner.

"She's right, Adrien," the kwami replied. "People might suspect something if she goes to a hospital. She just needs to rest."

"Rest? She's hallucinating her damn partner, Tikki. That hardly seems fine."

She began to murmur again and he knelt next to her, brushing her hair from her face and cupping her cheek in his hand. She didn't seem feverish at least.

"mmm'fine, Chat. paw-sitive." She giggled lightly, "get it?"

"I need you to wake up, sweetheart," he said gently. "Please, open your eyes for me. Let me know you're all right or I'm taking you to the hospital." It took a few minutes of his gentle prodding but she gradually roused herself enough to open her eyes and focus on him.

She gave him a small smile. "Adrien. How did I get…"

"You texted me, Mari, and then passed out. Scared me to death again." He helped her to sit up and pressed a glass of water into her hand. "Drink, it will help."

"Thank you for finding me."

"Always. Though I'd thank you to not be covered in blood next time. " He passed her a couple pain killers next and she swallowed them with the rest of the water.

It did help and Tikki was right, after a few hours she was tired but mostly herself again. He wondered if she remembered her hallucinations. He must have been staring, because Marinette's eyebrows furrowed. "What's wrong Adrien?"

"What if next time I can't find you in time?" he asked quietly, voice strained. "You could have bled to death in that alley, alone... less than a kilometer from our home."

"But I didn't. Adrien, I'm all right. I'm going to get hurt sometimes in this line of work, but most of the time the magic patches me right up again anyway. You know that, you've seen it."

"You need a partner, Marinette."

"Yeah, well I had one," she said bitterly. "I let him die."

Adrien was quiet again before finally he sighed. "He was very special to you, wasn't he? Chat Noir? He was... more than just your partner."

"Yes, of course. He was my best friend."

Adrien shook his head sadly, "You thought I was him when I found you, Marinette. That's not... that's not how you speak with your best friend. You were in love with him, weren't you?" Marinette hesitated.

"It's not… It's not that simple-"

Adrien looked up at her. "Don't I deserve to know if you were in love with another man?

"Yes, alright," Mari admitted. "Yes, I was in love with him."

Somehow he'd known for a while now, but hearing her say the words out loud sent a pang through his heart regardless. While he was struggling to cope with the barrier of lies between them, there was another who knew, who understood this secret side of the woman he loved.

"I never told him, I don't even think I fully realized it myself."

Underneath the pain and confusion an unexpected feeling came to the surface. Relief. Relief that for once she was telling him the truth.

"I … I understand," he whispered, the words surprising even himself. "He was a part of this life that you had to keep to yourself. You counted on him. And hey-" he laughed bitterly, "you always came home to me, right?"

"Yes. Always."

He nodded. "I'm sorry. Now was not the time for that conversation. But I just listened to you talk to Chat Noir for a few hours. I guess I'm not a good enough man to just… let it go."

"You are a good man, Adrien. You're the best man I know."

He smiled and rose, stretching out muscles that had begun to cramp squatted next to the couch. Not particularly comfortable. Speaking of comfortable... he bent and put one arm under Marinette's legs. "Grab on. You should sleep in a real bed."

"I can walk you know," she protested.

He smiled half-heartedly, "I may not be a superhero but I think I can manage this much." She locked her arms around his neck and he lifted her gently and made his way back into the bedroom. He set her on her feet next to the bed, keeping one arm around her waist until he was sure she was stable. He helped her to change out of her stained clothes and got her settled into bed. He dropped a kiss on her hand before retreating to turn off the light, but she refused to release his hand.

"Stay, please?"

"I was hoping you would say that," he said with a relieved smile. She pulled him down next to her and he placed a kiss on the top of her head.

"Sleep well, Princess."


Once Marinette was asleep he slipped from the bed, tucking her back in to ensure she was fast asleep. He grabbed his coat and hurried from the apartment in search of the one place that he had been quite certain that he would never set foot in again.

His father's house.

He'd a distant memory of a book that had something about Ladybug. Whatever that book said, he needed to know now, before she got herself killed. He needed that library, and Gabriel Agreste was not going to keep him from what he needed to know. He tried his code on the pinpad, unsure if it would still work but to his surprise the light flashed green and the gate creaked open.

The house was just as he remembered it. Cold and empty.

He made for the library, hardly bothering to quiet his steps. He'd never been noticed when he lived here, he doubted anything had changed. When he reached the library he paused for a moment unsure of exactly what he was looking for.

Bypassing all the shelves he headed straight for where his father would keep whatever was most precious. A safe in the back hidden by the portrait of his mother. He stared at the portrait for a moment, the one part of this cold house that he truly missed. Finally he pulled it open and looked at the safe for a moment. A doubtful look came over his face and he tried a number. The safe opened with a cheerful chime and his jaw dropped. His own birthday. His father had used his birthday to protect the safe? There were some years that Adrien wasn't even sure his father remembered his birthday. He shook his head and reached into the safe, pulling out some papers and a small black box to get to a large brown book in the back. Opening it he found that the text was in code, but with illustrations. This was about Ladybug and Chat Noir. He opened the box and saw a simple black ring with a green paw-

"Adrien?"

Adrien froze at his father's voice, some part of him suddenly feeling like a child again, caught doing something disappointing to the family name. He slipped the ring into his pocket and shut the box before turning around.

"Father."

"There was no need to sneak in, Adrien, this is your house too. But that book… why do you seek it?"

"This is the reason there has been no new Chat Noir, isn't it?" He held up the black box, "Because you're keeping it… why?"

His father hesitated a moment and then seemed to make a decision. "I hoped it might help me to return something to me that I lost."

"This city needs Chat Noir. Ladybug needs Chat Noir."

"And you suppose it's a simple matter of putting on a ring?" his father commented. "The power in that ring would destroy someone not chosen to wield it. Put it down. You are my son and I will not allow you to court danger with delusions of grandeur."

Affecting his most convincing disappointed face Adrien returned the box to the safe and his father shut the door the moment it closed.

"Ad-"

"I'm keeping the book," he told his father and stalked from the room. Some tiny part of him hoped that he would be followed. But he walked out the same way he had every other time. Completely alone.


Marinette was still asleep when he woke the next morning, having crawled into bed late after returning from his father's house.

The last akuma had really been hard on her... He got out of bed carefully, and dressed trying not to wake her. He dropped into the chair in front of his desk and opened the brown book again. He thumbed through it absentmindedly, not entirely certain what he was looking for. He could read very little of it, but he found illustrations of Ladybug and Chat Noir and their miraculous. He saw Marinette's earrings on one page and Chat Noir's ring on another. His hand slipped into his pocket when suddenly he was startled by a cry from the bed.

"Adrien… where did you get that?"

He turned, surprised. "My father's library. Do you know it?"

"Yes, I thought it was lost when I came back. I mean- Why do you have it?"

"You can't do this alone, Marinette. This book has the key to bringing back the power of Chat Noir's miraculous. I know it won't be the same but... you need a partner."

"No. Adrien, please." She pulled herself tentatively from the bed and moved towards him. "You have to let this go."

"Let it go? Marinette, you almost died yesterday, you can barely walk today. How could I possibly let this go?"

"There is a reason the power is gone. And it cannot come back."

"Why? Mari, you need help."

"When he died… Listen to me, Adrien. I can't tell you everything but I need you to know that what I am telling you is the truth, okay?"

He nodded as she leaned against the desk next to him and flipped to the page on Chat Noir. She pointed to the ring on the illustration the one that matched the one hidden in his pocket. "You're right. This ring is the key to bringing back Chat Noir's power, but Chat Noir's death is what allows you to live."

"How do you know this?"

"Papillon."

"And you believed him?"

"I couldn't risk losing you again, Adrien."

"Again?"

"I can't explain, and I'm begging you not to ask. But if Chat were to return… I might lose you both. Do you understand?"

"No, but I trust you." She flipped closed the book and leaned into him. He wrapped his arms around her shaking frame. "You shouldn't have to carry this alone," he whispered.

"I'm not alone."

The sound of sirens pulled her from her reverie and she felt Adrien stiffen.

"No, Marinette, please… not this time. You're still hurt."

"I'm feeling better already," she gave him that fake smile that made him cringe and stood.

"Tikki, spots on."


Damn.

She was gone before he had the chance to say another word and he dropped his face into his hands. It's going to kill her. This is going to kill her.

He raced out of the apartment after her, watching her take to the skyline. She wasn't feeling better. He knew it before the rest of Paris, but Paris would know soon enough. In the distance he watched something hit her hard and she went flying from the rooftop, just barely managing to catch herself.

Adrien ran, hardly knowing what he would do when he caught up with her, only knowing that he couldn't leave her alone. Not like this.

The Akuma she faced had a bizarre reptilian face and the wings of a dragon and God… she was in no shape for this. Reporters had gathered on the street below, awaiting the inevitable victory speech but this time was different. The creature tossed her like a ragdoll up on the roof and the reporters watched with dumb horrified expressions. Adrien didn't wait, sprinting into the building and finding the stairwell. He raced up, flight after flight, his lungs burning, listening the the crashing from above with increasing terror.

"Give me your miraculous, bug," he heard the creature roar. "Or you will splatter on the streets of Paris!"

He reached the roof access and pushed it open slightly. Ladybug was on her hands and knees bruises blooming across her face and her uniform once more wet with blood. Her yo-yo lay lost on the other side of the roof while the creature stood over her and she glared up defiantly.

The reptile dove for her, fangs gleaming in the sunlight and Adrien moved without thinking, bursting from the roof access and placing himself between the creature and Ladybug.

He closed his eyes but to his surprise it stopped and looked confused, he reached into his pocket and a small smile slipped over his lips. "I'm sorry, Princess," he whispered, "I refuse to watch you die."

Realization and horror dawned in her eyes but it was too late. He put the ring on his finger. A small voice near his ear screamed at him to say transform me but the reptile knocked him out of the way to reach Ladybug. He said the words and there was a sudden burst of light and the sound of voices in his head. Too much, too loud. He cried out, his head falling into his hands as the voices screamed at him… not voices… memories.

He remembered. He remembered races across the rooftops and terrible puns. He remembered Timebreaker and Copycat and wanting to kiss her so badly when they defeated an Akuma but knowing he'd have to wait until they got home. Because Adrien was allowed to kiss her… Chat was not. He remembered a moment not unlike this one. A strike that Ladybug had not seen coming, desperately throwing himself between her and her attacker. The thought was enough to make him look up.

"What have you done?" The reptilian creature was screaming at her, but her eyes were fixed on him, tears falling freely. He glanced up and saw a dragon wing necklace hanging around the creature's neck and launched himself for it. "Paw-don me," he cried, grabbing the necklace with one hand and pulling it free. He tossed it to Ladybug who caught it with a look of surprise.

"Come on, bugaboo. Help meow-t!"

She snapped out of it and smashed the necklace between her boot and the concrete, quickly neutralizing the Akuma. The recently akumatized man stammered something incomprehensible and bolted for the stairs back into the building.

"Bien joue'?" he said, dropping down beside her and offering her his hand.

"You're-"

"Chat Noir, pleasure to meet you-" he teased, taking her hand and pulling her to her feet.

"You were dead… Hawkmoth said if you remembered…"

"He lied."

"Why?"

"So he could keep the ring for himself, probably. Bugaboo… My Lady? Why are you crying?"

"Why am I crying!? You were dead you stupid cat! You died and I lost you and THAT'S how you tell me you're Chat Noir? And I got you… I got Adrien back, but you weren't … quite right and I was so afraid. So afraid that if you remembered I would lose you again." She launched herself into his arms and he stumbled back a step but closed his arms around her, nuzzling her neck with his nose.

"I'm sorry, my-"

"You're sorry? Don't you ever do that to me again, Chat. You shouldn't have jumped in front of me, you shouldn't have-" Tears were streaming afresh down her face and he shushed her gently, rubbing the tears away with both thumbs.

"I'm not sorry for that, my lady. Never." She punched him in the shoulder and he shrugged. "I love you."

"I love you too."

She'd told him that before, of course. Countless times as Marinette and they had been happy, but they had not been whole. There was a distance between them of so many lies, so many half-truths. But this time... no more secrets.

She closed her eyes, the last secret between them weighing heavily on her mind.

"I know why he lied. I know why he tried to keep you from remembering your life as Chat Noir."

"Because he's a super villain? Lying is what they do."

"He was trying to protect you."

Chat pulled away slightly to look at her. "Protect me? That doesn't make s-"

"Because he's your father, Adrien."

His jaw dropped and for a moment he said nothing, then he murmured something under his breath and Chat vanished in a flash of light.

"Spots off," Marinette said, joining him in civilian form.

Adrien was sitting on the ledge of the roof now, his Kwami in the palm of his hand, and Marinette came to sit next to him.

"Are you alright, Adrien?"

"What happened?"

"You jumped in front of me. You took a blow that was meant for me and it killed you." Her voice was small and she leaned into him for support. "I thought I'd lost you, both of you. Hawkmoth said he could bring you back with the power of your miraculous… I had to try."

"It was lucky that nothing else changed," Tikki spoke up. "Changing the past, even just a few minutes...it's very dangerous, Marinette."

"And to change something further back," Adrien asked. "He would need Ladybug's power for that?"

Tikki nodded.

"My mother." The words came out on a breath and this time she leaned in to support him.

"Would you let him try, if it were up to you?" Marionette asked carefully.

"Marinette!" Tikki scolded, but Marinette shushed her.

Adrien was quiet for a moment then finally shook his head. "Tikki is right. Even if changing something from so long ago didn't risk so much today… my father cannot be trusted with that power. All this time, all this fighting, so many people caught in the crossfire. He doesn't care who gets in his way." Adrien stood and pulled Marinette up with him, "Does he know … who you are?"

"No."

"Good. You'll need to be more careful. He'll keep coming, but now that he knows who I am he'll be trying to go around me to get to you."

"Let him try," Marinette said stubbornly.

"Not if I can help it, in fact... I think it's about time I had a conversation with my father."


Chat Noir marched into the Agreste manor armed with no more than an old book and a gamble. Gabriel met him in the grand foyer and Adrien would have been lying if he said he did not enjoy ordering his father to a more private room. Once they were alone he slammed the book down on his father's desk and flipped it open to the histories of previous cat-miraculous holders.

"Do you know, Monsieur Agreste, how many Chat Noirs have died protecting their Ladybug?" Before he could answer Chat continued, flipping through page after page of the history. "Nearly. Every. One."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"Because I know who you are. I know what you want, and I will not allow you to have it."

"You don't understand-"

"Don't I, father?"

"Adrien... if you'd only allow me to explain-"

"You cannot be trusted with the power of your own miraculous, let alone ours, and my mother would be ashamed of the carnage you've wrought in her name. Messing with time is dangerous and my lady and I have agreed that we got lucky, but it is not worth the risk again. So let me be very clear, you can continue to fight us, continue to seek the ultimate power, but I will be there by her side every day. I will block every strike. I will trade my life for hers without a second thought should it come to that. I have made my decision. Now you must make yours."


He was still shaking with a potent mixture of adrenaline and relief when he returned to their apartment where Marinette was pacing nervously. Without bothering to detransform he swept her up into his arms and held her tight.

"Do you really think it will work?" she mumbled into his shoulder.

"I don't know, Princess, but I had to try."

"And what if it does work? What happens to Ladybug and Chat Noir when there are no more super-villains to fight?"

"I don't think Paris will ever not need our help… and I do know you'd miss the leather."

She reached up and rubbed his ears teasingly, "Like you wouldn't?"

He grinned, unabashed, "but I would not mind facing villains without superpowers occasionally. And not having to run off at the sound of every siren…" as though at his cue the sound of a distant siren drifted through their window and he winced.

"Could be nothing..." he started, tightening his arms around her.

"Could be a… a false alarm, the police could probably handle it," she agreed.

Her eyes drifted towards the window and Chat sighed, loosening his grip. "You want to go check it out don't you?"

"It'll just take a minute," she bounded to the window and cried 'spots on.' He grinned when she looked back at him, a bright smile on her face and her trusty yo yo in her hand. "Well, come on! Last one to the scene does dishes for a week!"

"You're on, Bugaboo! You know… I do hate getting my paws wet."


AN: Hope you all had fun. Come say hi to me or leave a note so I don't get lonely and get akumatized. Just sayin' :P