NARUTO: READY, SET, COOK!

Chapter 2: Love, Tacos, and Temptation Part II

Hey! Well, this is part 2 of chapter 2!! It will be short, so sorry. Hm, Thanks again to my readers!! Oh, and a lot of the ideas here were suggested or inspired by Shadow Priesstes and my sister. Hm, I forgot to mention that there will be some het love aside from yaoi. The same warnings still apply.

Disclaimer: Never will own Naruto!! I am not lucky enough to own it!! TT


Continued:

Sasuke took the mango into his arms and…

Sakura came back to Sasuke's house with a cooking book that she had found. It took forever to find it, but she did in the end. Though she did have to wrestle a girl to get it. Why did that girl want the book for? She didn't have a ninja competition to win so the world's hottest Uchiha (in her eyes) would fall in love with her. Well, it didn't matter anymore.

The pink haired kunoichi opened the door (yeah, Sasuke does not lock his door!) and came in with a joyful smile placed on her face. "Sasuke! I'm back from the store, and I found a great recipe book, too!" she beamed with pride. Her smile soon washed away and was replaced by a face of pure horror and dread. The recipe book in her hands fell to the floor as she soon followed. Sakura was stunned!!

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! YOU ATE THE MANGO!!!"

Sakura could only stutter after bellowing. Too anyone other than the two present in the room, she would have seemed like a mental case. Now, she laid in the fetal position, completely shocked and horrified since they had nothing now. Their chance at winning the competition was over!! SHE WAS IN HELL!!!

Three hours later… according to crazy Sakura's brain. (Like ten minutes later in reality time for sane people.)

There on the kitchen floor laid Sasuke with the pitiful remains of the once glorious mango all over and around him. Too be honest, he looked like a pig! (Sorry fan girls!) Sasuke was so stuffed, so he couldn't move at all. Sakura couldn't believe her eyes at all. Why on earth would he have eaten it after she specifically told him not to? She was indeed more confused than angered at this point. Could things get any worse?

"Ugh, my stomach feels so…" Whatever Sasuke's remaining words would have been they were silenced by the vomit currently coming out from his precious Uchiha mouth. Sakura felt pity growing somewhere really, really, really, really, really deep in her heart. It was so deep that it didn't even affect her at all. Okay, so could things get any more worse, or is that an ill-fated question that dooms anyone?

Your answer is here!

The door suddenly flew opened and was tossed somewhere into outer space, never to be seen again by a very livid blond. "YOU STOLE MY MANGO, UN!!" His voice nearly popped everyone's ear drums, which angered his companion. "Deidara, please be more quiet. I know that pink haired bitch stole your precious mango that you cared for more than me, but you can't make us deaf for it," the one and only Itachi Uchiha said to his boyfriend.

Deidara gasped and immediately kissed Itachi on the lips as an apology for his outburst. "I'm sorry, un. I didn't mean to make you feel unwanted, Itachi-kun." Too everyone's surprise a smile grew on the cold Uchiha's lips.

"WTF? You're dating a guy?" Sasuke suddenly asked, unaware of how filthy he looked at the moment. "As if you're in a position to lecture me, otouto. The sight of you makes my eyes sting and my tummy churn," he said to his brother. Sasuke felt as if everything he knew and believed in was sucked out of his tiny dinosaur brain and stepped on, followed by it being burned.

Sakura looked at Deidara and wondered how Sasuke thought that Deidara was a guy. 'He looks like a girl with a flat chest, so I thought he was a girl. Sasuke is so smart!'

Deidara noticed Sakura staring at him, and immediately jumped on her. He started to hit her face and yank her hair out while Itachi and Sasuke watched in disbelief.

"Aren't you going to help your girlfriend, pig?" Itachi asked with a grin. "She's not my girlfriend! I am not a pig! And I always wanted to see Sakura getting beaten up by someone!" Itachi's eyes widened, but he thought about it and decided that he agreed with Sasuke this time.

After thirty minutes of torture, Deidara decided that he was tired of beating the now half-dead girl up and went over to his boyfriend crying hysterically. Itachi put his strong arm around his beloved and comforted him. Sasuke only glanced at Sakura with little interest and decided he needed to call someone over. He picked up his cell phone from his pocket and speed dialed Naruto's number. "Hey, I got something that you might want to see," Sasuke told Naruto over the phone. "Awesome! What is it? Is it porn?" Naruto's annoying voice replied. "No, it's not porn, and it isn't ramen either. It has pink hair. Come over, dobe!" Sasuke hung up and went over to Sakura.

She was half-conscious and kept muttering something about mangos, apologies, and her hair. So the young Uchiha did the only thing that he thought of. He took out a stick out of nowhere and started to poke her hard on the forehead. "How is it possible for anyone to have a huge forehead like this?" he asked himself. Itachi had been watching him and sweat dropped. 'I can't believe I am related to him,' he thought. Though he did have to admit that his brother looked adorable like that. There was nothing cuter than watching a (evil) self-proclaimed avenger that is related to a murderer poke the girl that has always loved him hard on the head. Deidara noticed Itachi's quietness and looked to see what the reason was. Once he saw Sasuke he knew why. "Itachi, you really love him deep down, un?" The blond only needed to see the small (creepy and dangerous to anyone else) smile forming on his thin lips to know that he agreed with him.

"SASUKE! YOU KILLED MY SAKURA!!"

"Naruto's here," all three of the men said.

"Shut up, Naruto. Sakura's still alive, but my brother's boyfriend almost killed her," Sasuke explained. "Boyfriend? Your brother's gay?!" Naruto had obviously had so much happened to him in one day. He didn't think he could handle anymore. And honestly he did not care if Sasuke and Itachi killed each other off right now…which wasn't a bad idea to the blond idiot. "Sasuke? How come you haven't killed your brother? Don't tell me the great Sasuke Uchiha is still weak," Naruto taunted. Yet somehow Sasuke knew this was going to happen. "Naruto take your Sakura to the hospital and quit bugging me. I don't want to kill him anymore because I found out that we share some things in common. And I am tired of being an avenger. Can't I take a break?"

Naruto's eyes widened and he collapsed. Was the world coming to an end? What on earth could have made Sasuke say that? Or was he going crazy? Despite his questions, Naruto got Sakura and left to the hospital in a flash.

"What is the reason for not trying to kill me anymore, little brother?" Itachi really wanted to know, but he tried to remain calm. Sasuke's eyes got big and sparkly before answering, "You're my brother and you're suppose to help me in any way!" There was no way in the Akatsuki hell that Itachi Uchiha would believe that at all!! Deidara giggled when he saw the disappointed face Itachi made. "You better tell him or else he'll end up killing you. And besides he gets teased a lot, especially by yours truly when he wants some, un." Itachi made a deep growl, but otherwise ignored Deidara's teasing.

"I need your help in the competition I am in. We need to cook a dish to win, but it has to be the best damn thing ever! Since Sakura is in the hospital due to the beating she took from your boyfriend, I decided that you owe me big time! So… PAY UP!" Itachi literally fainted when he heard what his otouto wanted. 'He is right. If you hadn't come, then none of this would have happened,' his mind scolded him.

"Wait, why should we help?" Itachi suddenly piped up. Before Sasuke could retort, Itachi countered with his reasoning. "You stole the mango that Deidara worked hard to grow! You still owe us!"

Sasuke had been counting on this to be happening, so he was ready with his surprise move! (a/n: this sounds like a YU-GI-OH! duel.) "Yes, she did take it without your permission. I am not to be blamed in this since I was not present when it happened, but I am guilty of eating it. However, I have something to use against you, brother dear." Sasuke's serious face was suddenly replaced by the face of evil!

Itachi gulped, but waited for Sasuke to say whatever it was that he was going to say. "I still remember what happened when we took a bath together, Itachi. All those times… Remember?" Itachi's face collapsed. Deidara was he only one that was clueless, obviously. From the way Sasuke said it, it almost sounded like something horrible. Something that brothers shouldn't do! Deidara's mouth was wide opened now. Sasuke noticed, so he warned the poor blond. "You've got a fly inside your mouth." Well, it still is a warning.

Deidara made a disgusted face as he spat out the fly (now dead). "It isn't incest," Itachi said, making Deidara's face glow bright red from embarrassment. "T-then what was it?" Both Itachi and Sasuke glared at each other, and Deidara knew where this was going…Nowhere.

"I'll make some tea, un," he said as he left the Uchiha brothers to their glaring contest. Needless to say that the issue was over. Both Deidara and Itachi were going to help Sasuke and Sakura with their dish.

………………………………...Meanwhile………...………………………...

Gaara's eyes fluttered opened. He remembered half of what had happened earlier, but at the moment all he cared about was his poor, hurting head. He noticed that he was in a blue-colored room. It had a drawer, closet, a nightstand, a lamp on the nightstand, a small mirror hanging from a wall, and a vase with flowers too. And of course the bed in which he laid in. It felt really cozy and he noticed the sheets were probably satin. He turned to his side and saw the most beautiful sight ever! Haku was laying next to him on the bed and pretty close to him too. Gaara felt nervous, excited, and full of joy. His hand slowly reached over and stroked Haku's silky cheek. The boy smiled and neared the source of contact. A smile formed inside of Gaara, and he felt complete.

Haku opened up his eyes and noticed that Gaara was awake and staring at him. "Have a nice nap? You passed out, so I brought you to my room to rest. Well, mot my real room since we don't actually live in the village." Haku sure was cheerful, but it didn't annoy Gaara at all. He found it rather cute to have this beauty care about him. "Thanks," Gaara whispered.

'He's cute…And sexy!' Haku turned beet read when he realized what he had thought about Gaara. The red-head only turned away to hide his smile after seeing his secret crush (or love) blush. However before the atmosphere got anywhere near romantic it was brought down by loud laughter and cursing coming from another part of the…house? Where the heck were they? (a/n: I don't know either!)

Haku got off from the bed and walked to the plain exit door. "It seems that we have company downstairs." Gaara followed suit and came next to Haku before exiting the room. They walked down the stairs, and only then did Gaara notice that they were indeed inside a house in the forest. "We sort of borrowed the house," Haku explained, leaving out the actual details of how Zabuza threatened the poor people that were going to use the small house for their camping trip.

Upon reaching the living room, they were greeted with a room full of nine laughing people. All except for Zabuza, were wearing black cloaks with red clouds on them. They all seemed rather weird to Gaara, but he forced himself to remain calm and collected as always. They kept laughing at some joke that Kisame had told them, so they didn't notice Haku or Gaara until Konan pointed them out. "Zabuza, who are they?" Haku immediately bowed to the woman and introduced himself and Gaara. "I am Haku, Zabuza's assistant. And this is Gaara, we just met him."

The Akatsuki were rather impressed with Haku's mannerisms, since they usually didn't display them themselves nor did they ever got treated like that (I wonder why). "Nice bitch you have here, Zabuza," Hidan said. Gaara nearly pounced on the man for that remark. 'How dare he talk about Haku like that!' Haku restrained Gaara's arm, preventing him from actually doing any harm. "Haku's not a girl; he just looks like one, you ass," Zabuza cleared for Haku, whom was rather glad that he didn't have to explain it. The Akatsuki looked at Haku for a long time before deciding that Zabuza was right. "I though the same thing when I first met him," Kisame said with a grin. "No one wants to know, you idiotic shark." Kakuzu barked. "Why are you acting like this? Don't tell me it's that time of the month for you." giggled Konan and everyone burst out in laughter.

"Are you drunk?" The room went silent and nine pair of eyes (even though not all were visible) landed on the young red-head. Gaara blinked several times and started to get really uncomfortable. They all started laughing and some (Tobi, Pein, Sasori, and Zetsu) collapsed. Well, that question was answered rather quickly, ne?

"Gaara, I heard you were in the competition. Though I failed to hear whether you had a partner or not," Haku quietly said to him, while the still-standing Akatsuki and Zabuza gawked at them. "Um, I don't have one yet…but I can choose whoever I want as my partner," Gaara told the beautiful boy that happened to be standing a little too close to him now. How he wished he could just kiss him, but there was no doubt that he would be laughed at, punched by Zabuza, and laughed at again. Basically, he was afraid to kiss Haku for fear that the boy might not like him back. As if that was the case.

"Gaara, so who will you choose?" Haku asked, his hands practically shaking. He could feel his breath get shallow from waiting anxiously for Gaara's response. 'Great, I'm afraid now!' Haku tried to get calm, but then Gaara's answer came. "If you're a ninja, then we could partner up…and work together…if you wanted to."

Haku's eyes lit up like a fireworks. His heart raced, and he actually thought that he might die at that moment. However, he knew it wasn't a suitable time to get like this when Gaara was still waiting for his response. "I-I am a ninja. Um, we could…you know…if you wanted to…"Haku couldn't form a damn sentence around the red-haired boy. Then he suddenly heard a gruff grunt and remembered that his life was not exactly his yet. "Oh! If that's alright with you, Zabuza sir," Haku added quite quickly for Gaara's comfort. Gaara looked at Zabuza, and felt as if he was gazing into the pits of hell itself. Zabuza saw the fear within Gaara and smirked. "Fine, but we'll all be keeping a close eye on you two and your competition!" Zabuza barked, leaving no room for protest from anyone in the room. And yet again, the Akatsuki were dragged into the competition, no thanks to their leader whom was currently passed out from drinking too much. In fact, this almost felt like a set-up. Why did things turn out this way for them?

……………………...…...The Next Day………...……………………...…...

"So, Naruto…what the hell are we , going to do for the competition?" Neji asked from his phone. Naruto had decided to stay in the hospital since Sakura was yet to be released, and Neji was not happy with it at all. They were suppose to be together in the competition and work together, but instead things worked out differently. Who the hell would beat up Sakura? In his opinion there were many, but none would do it and send her to the hospital!

"Hm, I don't know…How about a chocolate cake?" Neji could have slapped Naruto for that, too bad jutsus didn't work across the phone or on certain blondes whenever you snapped your fingers. "Naruto, after that little stunt that Sai pulled deserts and especially chocolate are the last things on my mind!" Naruto made sure to hold the phone away from his ear. The Hyuuga sure could shout loud, and would most likely leave him deaf. "Okay, so let's meet tomorrow…Or whenever my beloved Sakura can get out of the hospital, okay? We can decide then!" Naruto's voice was cheerful, too cheerful for Neji. And as soon as those words were said, the line was dead. "Damn it! Who forgot to pay the phone bill?" Neji was livid!

And so another day went to waste for Neji and Naruto.

………………………………...Meanwhile…………….…...……………………...

"Damn, don't you guys know how to cook?" Sasuke scolded his brother and Deidara. The two were in charge of baking their cheery pie (nothing original, ne?) while Sasuke worked on cleaning everything up after doing most of the work himself. However, leaving two lovebirds in charge was far from a bright idea. Instead of watching the pie bake, they were too deeply involved in exploring each other's mouths and groping each other. And now they had to deal with a small kitchen fire…Well, Sasuke since the other two were no longer present there and currently working their way towards a more private area. Apparently, they had chosen Sasuke's room. Things weren't exactly working for them now, so who else could have trouble like they did now?

………………………………...Meanwhile……………………...………………...

Lee looked at Shikamaru with uneasiness. They had been like that for two days (after Shikamaru got through with being high), not really moving a muscle. And why? Well, they were currently playing GO! Why? Because Shikamaru said that it would help him concentrate on picking out a dish. LIAR! Lee suspected that it was merely a ploy so they would not have to cook at all, and waste all their time playing board games that were really boring to him.

Things were just getting ridiculous. They had no plan for when day actually came that they had to cook something; Shikamaru was behaving beyond lazy than his usual self; and Lee had not been able to see his beloved sensei in such a long time now!!! "Um, Shikamaru, we should try to come up with something for the competition. I know you don't want to cook or do anything for that matter, but I want to win!" Lee began to whine. Shikamaru rolled his eyes. 'Crap, I listened to this speech already!' His mind was getting drowsy from not sleeping during his time with Lee. He felt too tired to even be thinking now.

Lee kept on rambling until Shikamaru felt flat on his face, causing all of the pieces of the game to fall and scatter around the floor. Lee took a moment to process what had happened. 5...4...3...2...1! "I'M FREE!! I'M FREE! WHOO-HOO!!" Lee was ecstatic that he didn't have to play anymore, especially since he had never played in his entire life!

His mind finally gave him a bit of bad news that definitely took years of his life. "OH MY GOSH! WHAT THE HELL ARE WE GOING TO COOK?! AND HOW THE F--K AM I GOING TO WAKE UP A LAZY BASTARD!" Lee fell to his knees and cried several tears of sadness and frustration.

Looks like things didn't go well for this team. Maybe the next will succeed in something, ne?

………………………………...Meanwhile……...…………………………...

"Uh, no!" Hinata tried desperately to keep Choji from eating their ingredients, but kept failing every time. That caused them several trips to the grocery store, but their money was dwindling and Hinata's father and Choji's father were getting pretty sick and tired of giving them money. Hinata wished she had a jutsu to make food appear out of nowhere…Or transmute it by using alchemy…but that was a different anime unfortunately. (("That's right! Keep going!" a voice message from our dear Edward Elric.))

Choji didn't mean to eat all the food, but his tummy kept telling him to do it. And unless poor Choji wanted to suffer the consequences of his stomach, he had no choice but to obey the horrible commands that came from his beloved stomach.

Hinata grew tired of going to the grocery store, keeping Choji away from the food, and trying to look up the recipe for making a chocolate soufflé that had mysteriously disappeared from Hanabi's secret recipe book.

She collapsed and waited for Choji to stop eating, so maybe then she could die in peace.

So much for this team working out. Sigh, maybe the next one!

………………………...………...Meanwhile…………...……………………...

Kiba and Shino were far too busy to actually cook something. Somehow they had both admitted their feelings to each other, well, after getting into a food fight and nearly demolishing Asuma's house. Why Asuma's house? Well, he agreed to let the boys use it (after Kurenai asked) since both were not allowed to cook in their own houses. Must be a guy thing. Well, needless to say that they were both far too busy exploring each other to even think about the competition. That was a thing of the past now, and they didn't bother with it now.

Apparently, things worked out differently for this team, but the next has got to be better!

………………………………...Meanwhile……………...…………………...

Ino glared at Temari through the bars of her cell. She was livid, and wanted to get the hell out of jail! Temari glared back, feeling exactly how Ino felt. They knew that the other was never going to give up, so the war still kept going.

A couple of hours earlier…

The competition was going to be tough, both kunoichi knew that. They had to put their differences aside and worked together like the team they were forced to be in. However, if they had kept cooking the lobster and chopping the vegetables to go along with the lobster instead of talking about boys this would have never happened.

"You know, Shikamaru isn't all that bad when you get to know him on a very personal level. He may be lazy, but he's cute!" Ino chirped happily as her hand held the knife steady as she cut up the vegetables. At first, they were both having the time of their lives. They realized that they had many things in common, and both shared things to each other that they couldn't with others. Yet, jealousy and possession do get involved when someone becomes infatuated. And this was no exception.

"Sure, he is. But I bet he'd enjoy a comment like that if it came from an admirer, not his little sister," Temari said, immediately starting the war!

"Sister? Hm, I think he likes me. We have been spending more time together, and I've developed feelings for him. I'm sure that he feels the same about me!" Ino glanced up at Temari and noticed something was off.

"OH MY GOSH! YOU LOVE SHIKAMARU, YOU BITCH!"

Temari managed to get a hold of the pan containing the lobster while Ino clutched the knife in her hand. Immediately both girls began to hit each other with anything that their hands grasped. And after they were done with those utensils, they began pulling hair, kicking, punching, and biting. (A/N: Whatever happened to using jutsus?)

Well, their little brawl escalated up to the point when neighbors complained about the disturbance of the peace. And they were both tranquilized, put in jail, and were not to be released until a day before the competition was to end.

Eh, so much for them. Come on, you just knew something like this would happen! LOL.

…………………………...……...Meanwhile…………………………...……...

"So, you got anything?" Kankuro asked as he polished Crow. Temari, whom had given up on looking for the perfect dish after hours of reading, was now listening to music and sharpening her own weapons. "Nope. Nothing we cook will be edible. We're both lousy when it comes to the kitchen," she replied, with mild interest. They had both decided that they would try to win the competition, but their morale was not at all high. Now their only chance was to wait until the big day and then decide on a dish.

So much for this team as well…

……………………………...…...The next day……...…………………………...

"Okay, so it's decided! Naruto, this is what we will make!!" Neji was at last full of happiness. Nothing and certainly no blond idiots could burst his pink giddy bubble!

Naruto had come over surprisingly early to the Hyuuga's house to decide on the dish. He secretly came over early so he could then go back to the hospital and help Sakura back to her home, but Neji didn't need to know that, right?

Even though the Hyuuga pretty boy was wide awake at five in the morning (A/N: LOL. My bed time!), didn't mean that the poor Uzumaki kid was. Naruto was half-asleep and barely listening to Neji's piercing voice. He heard something about going to the store to buy their ingredients since Neji had to go and get something from the garden. 'Why the hell does he need to go to his garden for?' Naruto questioned, but left to the store nonetheless.

Arriving at the store, he forgot all that Neji had told him to pick up. Not a good sign. So instead of calling his teammate, he decided to go along with his memory as best as he could.

"Hm, I'm pretty sure he said something about tacos…I think." Naruto went all over the store and gathered all the things they needed to make tacos. It did bother him that he felt as if something was wrong.

"Since when does Hyuuga like tacos? I thought he ate stuck-up princess food." Naruto thought for a moment, but pretty soon his mind shut down and he had no choice but to pay for the stuff and go back to Neji.

Neji was absolutely delighted at the though of winning the competition. He felt that with his dish they were going to win. The first couple of days were chaotic, but now things were going to go smooth. He heard Naruto walk in into the kitchen and went to meet him there. 'Doesn't he know how to knock? I could have him thrown in jail!' As much as Neji would have loved to do that, he knew he needed Naruto (much to his dislike) and so he had to look out for Naruto.

"I got…yawn…the…yawn…taco…stuff…yawn," Naruto said, but looked at Neji when he received no response.

Neji's mouth was as wide as a fish's gasping for air. "WTF? NARUTOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!" Well, that woke the little dobe up. Naruto took a couple of steps back and asked, "W-what's wrong?" Neji's ears released steam and he answered, "Naruto, we were going to make sandwiches! Why the (bleep) did you buy (bleep)-ing taco (bleep) for?" Angry and tired, Naruto was in no mood to take crap from anyone!

"Damn! Neji, will do tacos now since I bought the stuff already! Stop complaining, princess!!" Neji roared and pounced on Naruto. Naruto yelped but rapidly managed to flip Neji over so that he would be on top and Neji on the bottom. They began to punch and kick each other and pretty soon both were unaware that they had almost destroyed the entire kitchen. After getting tired they glared and panted. Their fight was not a difficult one, but all the steam that was let off was nice and tiring.

"I told you that we were going to make fruit sandwiches, but you…" It was completely unnecessary for him to continue, even Naruto could piece it all together by now.

"Too bad! We're doing tacos! I want tacos!" Naruto shouted. "Well, I say fruit sandwiches are better!" Neji retorted. "Baka! Anyone can make a stupid sandwich!" "Dobe! Anyone can make tacos!" "Tacos rule!" "No!" "Yes!" "No!"

And so it kept on going for eight long hours, and the next few days weren't easy either. They kept debating about their dish anytime they could, never getting anywhere in the end.


TBC…

A/N: Hm, well this is where we are going to leave off for right now. As you can see the Akatsuki is now in it against their free will; Naruto and Neji can't do a simple thing together; the rest of the teams are no better off; Gaara has finally found a partner; and Sasuke can eat a huge mango by himself.

Well, next time… The Akatsuki are finally going to get really involved in the competition, causing several others to fail. Hm, some trouble within the Akatsuki as well. Orochimaru-sama joins us along with his, and mine, beloved Kabuto Yakushi. What are their plans? The Sound of Five might join us. And we'll see how the all of the sensei (jounin) are doing. Can they be better than the rookies?

And I am also at a loss for pairings. The only absolute one that I know of is the one between Itachi and Deidara, and that will not change. It's something special for one of my lovely reviewers. You know who you are. LOL. And maybe Kiba and Shino. Yeah, but the rest are all free for the taking! Choose whoever you want, no matter how crazy the pairing is. I will see which has the highest points. You can vote for as many pairings as possible. I just need help with deciding the pairings. So, if my dear readers and reviewers could help, then that would be awesome!

BYE!

:-)