Chapter Three
I wake up early in the morning and order breakfast to my room. It's still dark outside when I peer out the window although the bright Capitol lights shine through my window. A Brunette female Avox brings me an omelette and orange juice for breakfast with a side of fruit. I sit on my bed and begin to slowly eat, trying to take up as much time as I can. I need to stop flirting with Annie which means it's better for me to not be near her as much as possible. I sit in my bed gazing out the window as the sun begins to rise, there are people walking outside our building staring at the windows trying to get a glimpse of a tribute, smiling and laughing and taking pictures. There are children playing with fake swords and bows and arrows pretending to fight to the death.
I find myself in the bathroom throwing up the omelet I had just eaten when I hear a gentle knock on the bathroom door, which is open. Before I even look up I know from the soft footsteps it must be Mags.
"Are you alright Finnick?" Mags carefully helps me up off of the floor and sits me down on my bed.
"Yeah, I don't know what hit me," Yes I do, the thought of all those horrible Capitol people thinking this really is a game. Thinking I'm their property and thinking of everything I've had to do for them… do to them. I shudder.
"It will end one day… when you're wrinkly and old just like me," Mags knows what's going through my mind… somehow she always does. She loves to make jokes to make me feel better but that just made it worse.
"Mags?"
"Yes dear?"
"Is that why you never got married? You were always stuck here… with them?" I don't really want the answer, but I need to be prepared for my future.
"Yes, and no. While it all did have to do with them, they finally let me go when I was a few years older than you, when a new victor took my place, poor Gabriella…" Mags shakes her head to focus "But by the time I was free, I couldn't feel right giving myself to another man when I was already so used up. I felt like I could never deserve a man after what I had done, even though it wasn't my choice. I eventually became an outcast because I rarely socialized, up until a few years ago I only came out of my house for the games, but then you came along Finnick, and I knew you were a fighter. It scared me because I looked at how handsome you were and how much the capitol loved you. It even got to the point where I thought they made sure you survived just so you could please the Capitol… sometimes I still wonder…"
I'd never thought about that before. Maybe I didn't win the games… Maybe the games were won for me. To make me be this sex slave for the Capitol, this realization sinks in and once again I'm running to the bathroom and throwing up whatever managed to be left in my stomach. Mags brings me a glass of cold water and she sits down next to me on the bathroom floor and gently helps me drink it.
"There was this very confused girl at breakfast this morning wondering where you were…" Mags says to me rubbing my back.
"I made a mistake last night Mags," I drop my head.
"FINNICK! YOU DIDN'T!" Mags voice raises as does her body and she looks furious. She thinks I slept with Annie. I jump up and defend myself, my stomach quickly reminds me this is a bad idea and I collapse again onto the floor.
"NO! I didn't do… that… not with Annie." Mags relaxes.
"What did you do then?"
"Well… I kind of yelled at her stylists about her lips… and then I iced her lips to make the swelling go down and I accidently kissed her." I put my head in my hands and sigh.
"Accidently?" Mags asked "How did you accidently kiss Annie Cresta?"
"I… I guess it wasn't an accident. But it was a mistake, a huge mistake. I can't deal with this right now." I talk to the floor as I stand up and walk over to sit down on my bed.
"You like this girl Finnick," Mags isn't asking a question.
"Yes, but I can't-"
"Why can't you?" Mags asks before I can even take a breath.
"She's 15, she's a tribute, I'm her mentor, there's hundred of reasons," I stand up and begin to pace.
"Do what you think is right Finnick, just remember, these could be the last few days of this precious girls life." With that, Mags leaves me alone in my room to think.
I promised Annie I would mentor her and help her and give her every way possible to survive without killing. I can't back out on her. Even though I know this can't work between us, I still can't stand watching her hopelessly die. I decide to man up, I dress quickly and brush my teeth before I walk out of my room and down the hallway to meet Mags and Milstra sitting on opposite sides of the room sipping tea and not looking in the others direction.
"Where are Annie and Chip?" I ask, neither of them in particular.
"They are with their stylists, we won't be seeing them until the opening ceremony tonight, you have an entire day to relax Finnick, I could show you around the Capitol," Milstra says in a very seductive tone.
"He's fine Milstra, let the boy alone," Mags barks at her. Milstra gives a death glare to Mags.
"Maybe some other time Milstra, I think I'm going to go spend some time alone." I'm grateful Mags said something, because if I would have said the same thing I would have been in grave trouble with the Capitol. One rule of being me: I'm never allowed to reject anyone in the Capitol. I quickly make my way to the elevator and ride to the lobby. I'm quickly greeted by last years victor, Johanna Mason.
"Finally someone who's not ancient," I smile at her "I'm-"
"Johanna Mason," She nods and smiles confidently "I'm-"
"Finnick Odair." She finished for me and I nod at her.
"I see you've done your homework," I joke "The first year is always the most awkward, everyone knows you but you have no idea who the hell everyone else is. After about two years, you're all family though. So welcome to the family Johanna."
"Not a very happy family though is it?" I'm surprised at how fast she seems to have gathered that just because you're a victor, it doesn't mean happily ever after for you.
"Some would have preferred to never of been chosen as a tribute, even though they won." I say.
"And some wish they never would have made it out alive," I can tell she's talking about herself. She seemed so weak in the games, so gentle and caring, and then when it came to the last few people we saw who she really was. A true killer. I can't imagine someone with that much power turning into someone like this. I would have expected her to be thrilled to have won and prancing around like some of the careers do the year after they win. This is not what I expected.
"It's already that bad for you?" I ask her as we sit down and get some coffee.
"Apparently there are some creeps in the Capitol who have a desire to watch videos of me which I refused to make, shortly after I turned down the offer-"
"You're family began to die, in mysterious ways," I finish her sentence for her.
"Did the same thing happen to you?" She asks.
"No, but it happened to my mentor. I accepted their creepish offers, and I still do to this day." She looks disgusted "My mentor warned me what happens when you reject the Capitol, and I couldn't do that to my family. But shortly after I won, my family disowned me."
"Why?" Johanna asks confused.
"They couldn't handle saying they raised me, when everyone knew what I was doing in the Capitol… They wanted to pretend like I was never theirs and that all my mistakes had nothing to do with them."
"Well Fuck them." I'm taken aback by Johanna's abruptness.
"Excuse me?"
"You don't need them, you should of just let them die if that's how they're going to treat you for saving their lives." Johanna sounds angry. "So, Fuck them," She repeats.
"They don't know I saved their lives though, I couldn't tell them that," I try and explain to her.
"They're your family, they should know that you wouldn't just bow down to the capitol if there wasn't motive behind it." I understand what Johanna is saying but I still couldn't allow my family to suffer on my watch. "They should always have your back, no matter what. I regret not having my families back every second of every day. I wish every day that I could go back in time and change what happened, just for them. Just as I know they would do for me."
"I guess families are different everywhere you go, I'm sorry about your family though," I say sadly.
"And I'm sorry about yours," She says, still looking rather upset and angry.
"What's it like being back here now that you've won?" I try and change the subject.
"Not quite as nerve-wracking. Though the foods not quite a delicacy anymore, but I'm surely taking advantage of the open bar this time around," I laugh at her and she smiles. "I feel like I'm always being watched here though."
"That's probably because you are," I shake my head "The capitol is very particular about what goes on here, they don't want any funny business on their turf."
"I guess that makes sense," Johanna mumbles "Just wish I could get some damn privacy now and again."
"Privacy for a victor is something we don't get much of," I tell her honestly.
"I can see that," she responds sadly. "What do you do if a friend gets reaped?"
"Pray that whatever you do helps them stay alive," I think of Annie and how I'll be praying throughout the entire games, again.
"It's nice to have someone else to talk to about these things that I feel like I can relate to," as Johanna says this I nod and I agree completely. I talk to Mags a lot, but it's different. She's much older than me and things just aren't the same.
"I'd love for you to meet my mentor from my games sometime, she's wonderful," Me and Johanna talk for hours, we get lunch together and talk up until its dinner time. We talk about what we used to do in our districts before we were victors, and what we do now. The hobbies we were forced to take or, or pretend we took up. The attention we get now wherever we go, the cheers and whispers, and there's always those we glare at us as if we're the worst people alive. We only realize how late it is when District 1's mentors come downstairs dressed up and ready and grab some drinks to wait for the rest.
I head upstairs and find Mags already wearing a long flowing light purple dress that looks very elegant on her. She yells at me for running late and asks me where I've been while I begin to change into black slacks and a white button-down with a bowtie matching her dress.
"I met Johanna Mason, the victor from last year. I was giving her advice and we just got to know each other a little better," at this Milstra storms out of the room. "Great."
"Don't mind her, what's Johanna like?" Mags asks me.
"She's fierce," I say and I try to think of another word to describe her "and very bitter."
"Already? So early into this?" Mags asks sadly.
"She's already lost most everyone," I inform her.
"Well good for you for talking to her, she obviously needed someone to talk to," Mags pats my back as we head down to the lobby. The elevator door opens and there stands Johanna Mason in a ruby red dress that stops just below her thighs. Her hair is pulled back in an elegant bun, her eyes are lined completely in black and her lips are as red as her dress.
"Mags, this is Johanna Mason," Mags smiles at Johanna.
"My dear, you look gorgeous," Johanna smiles at Mags as Mags gives her a hug.
"Really? I hate this dress!" Johanna says annoyed but begins to smile and chat with Mags as we make our way out of the building, I chip in on occasion. When we arrive we all sit together on a balcony set aside for the mentors for the ceremony. We wait patiently for President Snow to get through his speech. The first carriage begins to roll in, led by two beautiful white horses. The tributes in the carriage are wearing lacy white material with nothing underneath. I shudder hoping Annie's stylists covered her up. I pay no attention to the next two carriages and then my eyes land on a beautiful girl with flowing brown hair with highlights reflecting light. She's wearing a shimmery dress that seems to change from blue to white to purple depending on how you look at it. She has a shawl on that looks to be made of seaweed and it looks absolutely gorgeous on her. I hear a gasp to my left and look away from Annie and see Johanna looking mortified, I look down at the district seven chariot and I see why. Both of her tributes are wearing close to nothing. The boy is holding an axe and has a block of wood covering his privates, nothing else. And the girl has the same, plus a thick necklace of wood to help cover us her breasts, which is not working too well for her.
The crowd is hooting and hollering as the district seven chariot passes. The camera zooms in on the girl and you can see how embarrassed she is by the attention and what people are seeing. I feel instantly bad for this girl and for Johanna, she's going to have a lot of work to do tonight. Thankfully attention is brought off of Johanna's tributes when the District twelve chariot rolls out and it looks as though their stylists just told them to roll around in some charcoal and get on the chariot. Absolutely everything is visible. Haymitch Abernathy, the district twelve mentor sighs behind me and I turn around to see him take a swig out of his flask.
"You might want to take it easy there Haymitch," I say to him and he just chuckles.
"Kid, people have been telling me to take it easy since I was seventeen, hasn't killed me yet, and trust me, I've been trying."
I don't doubt it.
President Snow makes his closing speech and we all head back to the training center to talk to our tributes and to eat something and go to sleep. Mags and I meet Annie and Chip as they are being escorted off of their carriages and lead them back to the building. Annie makes her way next to me and brushes my arm so I know she's there… I always know she's there.
"Where were you this morning?" She asks me.
"I wasn't feeling well," I answer her bluntly.
"Did I do something wrong?" She asks me, she sounds hurt.
"Wait a few more minutes and we'll talk about this inside, alright?" I feel bad now and I look at her and she nods. They make each district take its turn on the elevator so nothing happens between the tributes. We finally make it up to our floor and Annie follows me to my room.
"Alright, so what's up?" Annie asks me seriously.
"I'm sorry about last night it never should of happened." I can't look at her.
"Why not?" Annie asks frustrated "You wanted it, I know you did."
"It's not good for you, I'm not good for you." I want to explain everything but I can't.
"I don't care about what you've done Finnick, I know you're a good guy, there's more to you than what people see," Annie reaches out and takes my hand but I pull away.
"You need to focus on survival, not me." I respond.
"And if I survive?"
"We can rethink this." I look up at her and she nods.
"Then I know what I've got to do." Annie says determined.
"And what's that Miss. Cresta?"
"I've got to win for you."
A/N: Thank you all for the reviews and follows and favorites! Every review motivates me more to write and update! I love writing this so I will definitely continue as long as I have fans who want to read it! Thank you again and please keep reviewing, it really means a lot!