Author's Note: I'm sorry for the huge delay in all my stories guys. Life and computer problems got in the way, not to mention me obsessing and rewriting this one chapter a million times. LOL
Anyway, this chapter is super long though, so I really it makes up for the wait a little. And again, thank you so much for your support with this story. You're reviews truly drive me.
Now, you're going to have even more questions after reading this chapter, but I promise in time they will all be answered, including how Haley ended up in the water. With that said, this chapter is a high 4, so proceed with caution.
I want to thank Christina for beta-ing and just always being all around amazing. hugs
This is dedicated to Sara, who I so have to catch up with and catch up on her incredible story as well. I've missed you girl!
"Paper Doll"
Only daughter
You got your ticket too soon
Holy water
'Cause everybody's getting ruined
They are waiting to see what you do
Too long, waiting
Everybody's cleared the room
And they'll dress you up
Stand you in all the right places
Words like honey
They smile as they change your faces
With no regard to you at all
And you find they treat you like a paper doll
Oh, the bridge is narrow
And you've got so far to fall
And you know down in dirty water's
No place for a paper doll
Rachael Yamagata
July 4th, 2005
"All right Scott, I had to charm three drooling assholes to get my shit out of my car and into my apartment. Where the hell where you?" Peyton Sawyer demanded, frustrated, as she plopped down in a leather recliner in the main living area of the basketball house.
Nathan kept his eyes on his Xbox 360 game. "Sorry, I guess I lost track of time." He simply replied.
She rolled her eyes. "You lost track of time? That's all I get? And since when do you get to wear the bitch crown? For the past month you have flaked out on me, screamed at me more times than I can count, and been a fucking zombie. What's going on?"
"Nothing is going on."
"Nathan, I never take your shit, especially your bullshit, so what the hell is up? Is this about Jake?"
As usual, she managed to say the wrong thing and the wireless remote in Nathan's hand flew across the room, hitting the wood floor with a loud crack. "Fuck off Peyton." He stood to leave.
Jumping up, Peyton grabbed his arm, forcing him to face her. "Don't do this. This is a hard time of year for me too."
Sighing he mumbled out a quick sorry. "Training has just been hitting me hard lately." He explained and it was partly the truth. His body had never been through so much punishment than it had in the last few weeks.
Realizing that was as close as she was going to get to answer she let go of his arm and switched subjects. "When are you heading back to Tree Hill?"
"I'm not." Nathan said simply, sitting back down on the couch, not objecting when she sat beside him.
"It's the 4th of July, Nathan, a.k.a. your parents annual ginormous summer bash."
Shrugging indifferently, Nathan crossed his arms at his chest. "So."
"So…your mother and father will string you up if your ass isn't there."
Unfortunately, she was right. This party had been held every year since he could remember. It was a chance for his mother and father to show off their legacies and flaunt their wealth and if part of their legacy were missing it would not be pretty.
"I guess you're right." He conceded. "You wanna come? I could use an ally."
She stood and ruffled his hair, earning her a scowl. "You know I love ya like a brother, but I'd rather sell my soul to the devil than spend two seconds with your parents."
"Bitch."
"Yeah, yeah. Call me when you get back, and you can show me some of the local haunts."
Walking her to the door, Nathan said goodbye and went to grab his keys. If he didn't leave now, he never would.
…
"How do I look?" Brooke spun around in her tiny bright red bikini, complete with a sheer white sleeveless tunic as a cover up, which didn't really live up to it's purpose.
"Like a slut, but a hot one." Haley grinned as she finished putting on her own bikini, an azure colored halter style top, kept in place by a gold tone clasp in the center front with low rise bottoms to match.
They were getting ready at Brooke's parent's beach house for The Scott's annual 4th of July bash. This had been their routine for the past eight years. They always lay out during the day while the boys are busy helping set up for the party. Then around five they head down the party and reunite with their guys for a dip in the ocean and a night of hanging out by a bonfire waiting for the sky to explode with a multitude of vibrant colors.
Pulling her hair into a high ponytail, Brooke decided to let her best friend in on a secret. "Guess what Hales? Tonight's the night."
"Huh?" Haley faced her confused as she secured her short black silk pareo low on her hips. "The night Brooke Penelope Davis finally gives it up. Can you believe I actually made it to sixteen?"Laughing Haley slipped on some simple black flip-flops. "You're still fifteen Brooke."
"Oh please, I'll be sixteen in two days. Besides, not all of us plan on wearing our chastity belt till our wedding day."
Haley froze, as the image of Nathan tearing through her and bringing her more pain and pleasure than she ever fathomed sucked the breath right out of her, just like it had every morning when she woke up and realized it was her reality.
The ironic thing was, though, that she'd gotten over the act itself, gotten over that she'd betrayed Chase in the worst possible way, but what she hadn't gotten over was wanting to do it again and again and again.
Brooke rushed to her side, feeling her suddenly pale friend's forehead. "Shit Haley, what's wrong? Are you sick or something?"
Blinking a few times, in an attempt to come out of her daze, Haley managed a smile. "I'm fine. Let's head over to the party before Lucas starts to whining."
"Whatever, after tonight that boy won't even remember his name." Brooke winked, looping her arm through Haley's and leading them out the door.
…
Coming up from the water, Lucas spotted Haley and Brooke laying out their towels on the sand and made his way out of the waves towards them.
"Broody, if you get my hair wet I will kill you." Brooke threatened pulling her tunic over her head and tossing it on a nearby lounge chair, Haley following suit.
"Of course not honey." Lucas smiled sweetly, while giving a conspirator nod to Haley.
"Good." Brooke replied bending over to find her sunscreen in her oversized hot pink tote, letting out a scream of surprise when her boyfriend yanked her over his shoulder and took off towards the water.
After being dunked against her will, Brooke popped back up turning shell shocked eyes on her best friend who was currently laughing her dry ass off mere feet away from the water's edge. "What the hell happened to hoes over bros, Hales?"
Before she could respond. Haley was literally swept off her feet into Chase's arms and flung into the ocean as Brooke's laughter cut through the air.
Coming to the surface, Haley wiped the excess water from her face and spotted Chase wading, with a shit-eating grin, to the left of her.
Swimming over to him, she was pulled into his arms as soon as she was within reach.
"You hate me?" He asked with a pout while enjoying the view of her slowly licking the salt off her lips.
"Nah, I'm not as high maintenance as Brooke." She giggled knowing Brooke heard her when she felt a splash come from behind.
Catching his girlfriend's eyes, Chase smiled, "I've missed you Hales."
"I saw you this morning." She laughed, relaxing a bit in his embrace. After her night with Nathan, she'd barely been able to look Chase in the eye, but for the last week or so it had gotten a bit better. She'd even agreed without hesitation to attend the party. Of course, it helped that Lucas had mentioned in passing that he didn't think Nathan would show.
He tenderly pecked her lips. "That seems like a lifetime."
She kissed him back—deeply—pushing away all her thoughts of Nathan Scott. This was her sense of normal; this is where she belonged, even if it was slowly eating away at her soul.
…
After making a quick stop, in his designated bedroom of the beach house, to change into pair of cobalt blue swimming trunks, Nathan walked out onto the back deck, raising a glass full of his father's finest Scotch to a group of older sluts already ogling his muscular bare chest.
'Not a chance in hell bitches.' He mumbled through a fake smile, not aware his mother was coming up from the side until it was too late.
"Nathan, darling," Deb cooed, with open arms, as she approached her adopted son.
Cringing, Nathan let her hug him, taking note of the slight sway in her steps. Anytime his mother wasn't out of town she was knocking back the bottle. He didn't blame her though. Having to be within ten feet of Dan Scott would drive anyone to drink.
Pulling back Deb kept her hands on his shoulders. "Let me look at you. Do you know it's been two months since you've been home? I'm starting to think I didn't raise you right."
"Funny. Now let's figuring out how much of my childhood you missed out on?"
She cut her eyes to either side of her, then glared at him. "Nathan this is not the time nor the place."
He chuckled, amused by her sudden worry over her reputation. "Don't worry Mom. No matter what, in this town, you'll always be the martyr, and I'll always be the bastard you had to raise. So sit back and enjoy it."
Turning his back on her, he headed down to the beach, hoping to catch the last few rays of the dwindling sun.
It was when he finally settled onto a large white lounge chair, a little ways away from the house, that he spotted the girl that had been haunting his dreams for the last month, both conscious and subconscious, in all her fuckable glory.
Her arms were wrapped around another guy, but it did nothing to deter his want for her. She could be walking down the aisle, about to say 'I Do' and he'd still want throw her up against a random pew.
Usually, once he got a taste, that was it. With Haley, though, he only wanted more.
Since their night together, he'd tried to get her out of his head, tried to remind himself of the damage he would without a doubt cause in her life, not to mention his brother's, however seeing her now none of that seemed to matter.
He needed a distraction and as if on cue Damien and Tim came up from behind him carrying a large red ice chest between them, which was undoubtedly filled with beer for the guys and wine coolers for any chicks that showed up.
Nathan took the last sip of his drink then turned back to them. "Toss me one." He motioned towards the ice chest.
Damien grabbed a bottle of bud light and threw it to him. "You know, you call me and Tim on your way back to TH, tell us to get our ass's in high gear and over to your parent's beach house and all we get is 'toss me one.' I'm starting to feel used man."
Chuckling, Nathan popped the top of his beer. All in all he'd actually grown to like Damien over the past few weeks. Now that they were on the same team their bitter rivalry had vanished in favor of a common goal—bringing back the championship title to Duke.
"What the hell else where you two going to do besides stare at your life sized cut outs of Jessica Alba. At least here you actually have a chance to stare at some real ass."
Tim gazed out at the water, spotting Haley and Brooke engaged in a game of chicken and looking oh so hot. "Damn straight and stare I will."
Letting out a long satisfactory whistle Damien agreed. "Fuck yes, I'm so tapping some of that tonight."
"No you're not." Nathan warned, not comfortable at all with the prospect. "The brunette is my brother's girl and the blonde…"
"Has a boyfriend." Tim finished for his friend.
"That pussy looking dude? I'll give him a run for his money. " Damien boasted as he continued to enjoy the view of the two hot girls grabbing at each other. What he wouldn't give for one of them to accidentally yank the other's top down. Where the hell was the girls' gone wild crew when you needed them?
Nathan pulled his sunglasses up to glare hard at Damien. "Stay the fuck away from her West, got it?"
"Geez, got it, but y'all sure as hell know how to grow them in Tree Hill."
Smiling at that, Nathan bumped fists with him. "You better believe it."
…
"Damn it" Lucas blew out after Haley sent Brooke tumbling off his shoulders. "How can you be so tiny and be so damn feisty?"
"Wouldn't you like to know?" Haley quipped, as she slid off Chase's shoulders and dipped her head back to rewet her hair.
Brooke shivered. "It's getting cold guys."
She was right, the sun had already begun to set, taking away any warmth it had been providing for them with it.
Facing the shore first, Lucas squinted his eyes to focus on three familiar looking figures setting up a fire in a pit about a hundred yards from the beach house. It had to be his brother and his friends, because in the past Lucas and Nathan always made it a point to distant themselves from the adults as the party shifted from day to night.
"Hell yes! Nathan is here, and I see an ice chest." Brooke exclaimed pointing in the direction Lucas was already focused on.
Haley jerked around only to have her worst fears confirmed. She must have done something really bad in a former life.
"Hales, you coming?" Chase's voice called out to her while he swim away from the underwater sand dune they'd been occupying.
Nodding, she followed him out of the water, making sure to take her time, as if waiting a second longer would solve all her problems. Before she could even try to avoid eye contact with Nathan, though, a random guy moved to block her path.
He gave her a dazzling smile and stuck his hand out. "Damien West."
Grabbing a towel from Brooke, Haley began drying her hair, but still took a second to shake his hand. "Haley James."
She smiled kindly, figuring he was another Duke player, given his height and athletic figure. He wasn't bad on the eyes either, with his sandy blonde hair and cat green eyes. No doubt, he was a player on and off the court and enjoyed every minute of it. It was only fitting he was one of Nathan's boys.
"So Miss Haley James, do you believe in love at first sight, or should I introduce myself again?"
She had to admit he was amusing. "Actually, yes. Just ask my boyfriend."
Damien tilted his head towards Chase, who was in the process of poking the fire with a large stick and obviously not paying attention to her. "Is that him? Because gorgeous, one night with me and you won't even remember his name."
Haley laughed at his boldness, but her laughter quickly died down when she felt Nathan's eyes burning holes in her back, sending shivers down her spine. "Um, yeah that is, and I better get back to him."
Turning her back on Damien, she found Nathan's eyes had left her and focused on some blonde bimbo bouncing by in a tiny sports bra and tight jogging shorts. 'Ass.'
Draping a dry towel over her shoulders, Haley walked over to where Chase was sitting, leaned down, grabbed his face and gave him a smoldering kiss for all to see.
After a good twenty seconds, she pulled away and sat down beside him, trying with all her might not to cut her eyes to Nathan.
"Damn gorgeous, just break my heart why don't ya." Damien proclaimed pulling a bottle of everclear out of the cooler and taking a couple shot glasses out of his pocket. It was time to really start drinking.
An hour later, everyone was well on their way to drunk, except for Haley who had yet to touch a drop per usual in her friends' presence.
"Halessssssssss." Brooke grinned broadly at a melancholy looking Haley that was focused on the crashing waves before them.
"Yes Brooke?"
"Before I get so wasted that I can't form sentences. What time does the bus leave for cheer camp tomorrow?"
Nathan glanced over at that, watching a flash of absolute boredom cross Haley's features at the reminder.
"We're meeting at the school parking lot at five, but I think I might just drive up later that night. Remember I signed up to help tutor some kids and Principal Turner is giving me a trial shot tomorrow afternoon with a couple kids taking summer school."
A frown immediately came across, Brooke's usual cheery face. "Hales, you can't miss the bus ride up there. We're co-captains and we have to go over all the routines on the way so we can practice as soon as we check in, you know that."
"You're right." Haley apologized, not wanting to let Brooke down. "It's just I don't know when Turner will give me another shot."
Chase cuddled up to her. "Aw, babe, you don't have time for it anyway. Cheerleading is all year round and then there's us." He huskily reminded her, giving her a few kisses on her neck.
For a brief second, Nathan felt sorry for Haley, even identifying with her to a degree, but his indifference with the world stomped it quickly out, as did watching she and Chase begin to make out.
"Woah, Hales, is someone else thinking of giving it up tonight?" Brooke teased; taking an opened strawberry flavored wine cooler from Tim.
Damien's eyes lit up. "Shit, you're a virgin? Marry me?"
Even Chase had to laugh at that. Of course, he never got jealous anyway. After all, Haley was perfect and perfect girls never cheat.
Haley gave Brooke an annoyed look. "Do we really have to bring up my sex life in front of everyone?"
"Sorry love." Brooke blew her a kiss. "You know I have no control over what comes out of my fabulous pouty lips."
Nathan threw a beer bottle cap at Chase, garnering his attention. "So, you've been dating little Haley James for eight years and haven't hit that? Damn, we need to start calling you 'blue balls' Adams."
True to form, Chase remained a gentleman. "Dude, we're not about that and it's our business."
Snuggling into his side, Haley kissed his cheek then focused on Nathan. "And that's why you'll be married five times and Chase and I will live happily ever after."
Chase returned the favor, kissing her cheek.
Nathan chuckled at her half ass attempt in trying to make him jealous. He was sure it took all her strength not to choke on her own words.
"I don't ever see Nathan marrying." Brooke threw her two cents in. "In fact, I see him only having baby mommas in the form of pathetic groupies he banged on the road."
"Thanks for the vote of confidence." Nathan raised his beer bottle up to her in mock salute.
She rolled her eyes. "Oh, shove it Scott. Like you ever give a shit about any girl you see."
Damien joined in on the debate as he sat back down on the other side of Haley. "I have to agree with dimples. You're the only guy on campus that could rival my pimpness."
Nathan grinned. "Fuck it, why am I arguing? I'd rather fuck a new girl every night, then be pussy whipped." He eyed Chase and Luke. "No offense." He smirked, then finished off his beer and tossed it effortlessly into a trashcan twenty feet away.
Lucas took a drink of his own beer, while holding back Brooke with one arm. "Listen, let's stop this debate before the girls go ape shit."
Nathan wasn't backing down; especially with seeing how uncomfortable Haley looked. "What? It's pathetic. You guys have been together since grade school and never do a damn thing without the other. Seems boring as hell to me." He leaned over and grabbed another beer from the cooler.
"Yeah, but you also get ass anytime you want." Tim grinned, happy with his comment.
"Not if you're with Haley." Nathan set his amused eyes on her. "Do you at least give Adams, here, decent blow jobs? You do have some big lips, I bet…"
Lucas reached over and clamped his hand over his brother's mouth. "Shut up."
Haley could feel herself about to lose it. Being in the same place with the one guy that could destroy her world with a single confession was too much to bear. At first, she didn't think he'd even give her a second glance, but now it was obvious he was zeroing in on her and enjoying the hell out of taunting her.
And unfortunately being in Chase's arms was doing nothing to comfort her, nor was the fact that he just sat there and didn't do a damn thing to defend her. His default passive approach was starting to wear thin.
"I'm not feeling too good. I think I'm going to head back." She rushed out, as she hopped to her feet, letting her towel drop to the ground.
Chase grabbed her hand from his sitting position. "I'll come with you."
She forced a reassuring smile his way. "No, stay and watch the fireworks. It's just one of my migraines coming on. Come visit me later, though."
"You got it." He kissed her hand, too drunk to really argue with her, then let her go.
Once everyone watched her practically bolt away they cut their eyes to Nathan, clearly not pleased in the least with him. Even Damien and Tim had turned on him.
"I'll go apologize." He sighed, annoyed at having to play the good guy, but from the look on Lucas's face he knew he'd crossed the line, and he didn't need his brother on his ass twenty four seven until he made nice.
He stood and took his keys out of his pocket to which Lucas quickly snatched them away. "No way in hell you're drinking and driving with half the town's justice system partying in our house. It's only a little over a mile down the shore to Brooke's. You can walk."
Rolling his eyes he began the slow walk down the beach. Twenty minutes later he'd reached the long daunting pier that led from the Davis' land and stretched out at least a thirty yards out into the ocean.
When he got a bit closer he spotted Haley sitting at the very edge, her feet dangling off the side, still in her bikini.
She heard the creaking of the boards behind her, but didn't turn. Somehow she already knew who it was.
"Not thinking of jumping are you?" He asked lightly as he sat down beside her, leaving only a few inches between them.
"You'd probably enjoy that wouldn't you?"
He shrugged. "I have had a few sluts threaten to slit their wrists after I got all I needed out of them, so just checking."
She laughed and shook her head in disbelief. "God, you're so damn full of yourself."
"Didn't stop you from jumping on my dick, did it?"
"Do you have to be so crude?"
Smirking, he let that comment slide and the pair fell into an oddly comfortable silence.
A few minutes later, Nathan spoke again. "So, you really didn't tell anyone, not even Brooke?"
"I told you before it's not something I'm proud of. You're the one that seems to want to tell the world."
"Honestly, getting under your skin just helped me pass the time tonight and that's all there is to it. I won't knock you off your pedestal, James."
She turned slightly to face him. "Don't you ever get tired of being an ass?"
Twisting around he met her vibrant eyes that were deep, he was pretty sure he could spend a lifetime staring in them and never reach the other side. "Don't you ever get tired of living a lie?"
"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"
Still staring in her eyes, he clearly saw the anger she wanted him to see, but he also saw the fear; saw that she was terrified he could actually see through her façade.
"Nevermind, it doesn't matter." He chuckled and got to his feet.
She hopped to her own feet, however grace was not her middle name and as if in slow motion she began to stumble backwards, her heels digging into the edge of the pier as she felt herself falling over.
Her eyes shut tightly as she prepared for the thirty-foot drop into the sea—but it never came. And when she opened her eyes again, she found herself in Nathan's strong arms and realized his quick reflexes had saved her. The strange thing was though, that she was still terrified. In her mind, being this close to Nathan was just as dangerous as the crashing waves below.
"Careful there, you don't need another halo."
Stepping out of embrace, she winced when she put pressure on her left foot.
Noticing her discomfort, he groaned. "Jesus, this night and shining armor shit is getting old." He mumbled and surprised her by sweeping her into his arms and unlike with Chase, she felt a strange exhilaration at the act. Still, she despised that he was helping her.
"I don't like it any more than you do. Just drop me at the house and then you can go find your whore for the night."
He stayed quiet, choosing to focus on not dropping her in his semi-drunken state.
Once inside, he sat her down on the granite kitchen counter and gently took her tiny foot into his hands noticing a nice size abrasion on her heel. It wasn't bleeding, but looked painfully raw.
"I told you to leave." She snit, biting her bottom lip when his fingers brushed the marred area of her heel.
Ignoring her, he let go of her foot and made his way into the other room to the large wet bar he'd passed when he carried her in.
Returning a few moments later, he carried a bottle of gin in his hand. Grabbing a paper towel, he opened the bottle and poured some of the liquor onto it.
Watching him quietly, as he cradled her foot again and dabbed her wound, she was amazed at her careful he was being with her. Careful or gentle were never two words anyone would use to describe Nathan Scott, so to see a glimpse of those qualities in him was pretty damn astonishing.
"I didn't see any band aids in the bathroom down the hall. Are there any downstairs?" He questioned, as he dampened the paper towel with a bit more liquor and repeated his earlier ministrations.
"Are you kidding me? If it isn't in a design magazine or at least ninety proof, Claudia Davis won't allow it on her property."
Nodding in understanding, he tossed the paper towel in the nearby stainless kitchen sink and lifted her foot a bit higher up and softly blew on her abrasion, hoping to dry the alcohol in it's place to prevent any infection.
Haley shivered when his breath hit her skin and within seconds, her hate for him was replaced with uncontrollable need. The same need that had overpowered her a month before. 'How could you hate someone one moment and want to rip their clothes off the next?'
Bringing her hand up to her cleavage, she found the gold clasp just below it and with a flick of her wrist the sides of her top fell apart, exposing her full breasts with her rosy nipples on fill alert.
She knew she was acting like a whore, the ones she always looked down upon in school, but it was the only way she felt she could escape her other life. It was self destruction at it's worst, but still she honestly didn't see why anyone would find it more damaging than her turning to drugs and alcohol like most teenagers do to escape their demons. At least she could have sex and still drive. Walking may be another story, but driving she could do and in her head that was reason enough to repeat this mind blowing mistake.
Of course just like all vices, you always have to pay a price. All she could do was hope that her debt wouldn't be called in anytime soon
Satisfied that he'd done all he could, he softly released her foot before standing back upright and getting one hell of a shock and subsequent hard on.
"Damn." He half stated, half growled.
She smiled seductively and spread her legs, clearly inviting him in.
God she wanted him.
Just like before, a part of him knew this was a mistake, knew that this would most likely destroy his relationship with his brother if it ever got out, but he also knew he couldn't walk away.
Gazing at her displayed before him with her hair cascading in loose curls down her creamy shoulders, nothing else in the world seemed to matter and this time he wasn't praying for a distraction.
Closing the distance between them, he took her face in his hands and pulled her into an earth shattering kiss that was so powerful and dominating, Haley felt as if he was capturing her very soul and ironically in a way he was. With each kiss, each touch, he was chipping away at everything she was taught to believe and everything she was supposed to desire.
Moving his lips to her neck, his hands fell to her heaving breasts and grabbed each mound hard, squeezing and twisting her nipples until she was bucking against him and clawing at his back as her uncontrollable moans filled the air around them.
God he wanted her.
Sliding her hands in between them, she made fast work of untying his trunks and as soon as he was free, she gripped her right hand tightly around him, eliciting a primal groan from his lips, that filled her with a sense of power she never knew existed before him. It was intoxicating and she was pretty damn sure it always would be.
Feeling his fingers slip inside her bikini bottoms, she cried out at the exquisite jolt that sparked deep within her belly. She was so close and they both knew it.
In her haze she barely noticed him retrieve condom from the one pocket in his bathing suit and slip it on himself. Apparently guys like Nathan Scott were always prepared; not that she was complaining at the moment.
Aching to be inside her and push her over the edge, he shoved himself forward, slamming into her and just like he predicted she shuddered in his arms and cried out his name.
Breathless, Haley opened her eyes and found his cobalt orbs staring back. "I hate you."
"I know." He promised, then kissed her deeply, as he began to move in and out of her, thrusting hard and fast, as if her words hadn't phased him at all.
Her hands dug into his scalp as he claimed her as his once more, slamming her back repeatedly into the decorative tiles behind her. But just like this last time, the pleasure took away any power the pain held as she rode wave after wave of ecstasy.
Feeling her muscles contract around him and her body shiver as her second orgasm spread throughout her tiny body, he let go. And with a just few more thrusts she had milked him gloriously dry.
When she felt him withdraw from her, an uncontrollable ache overtook her at the loss of him. Maybe just one more round and he'd be out of her system.
Running a finger down his bare chest, she smiled shyly, still showing signs of her innocence even after what they had just done. "You know I think we could both use a shower."
Reaching out, he brushed the back of his hand across both her still erect nipples. 'Damn, they we're fucking perfect.'
"Don't be such a cockhound James, it doesn't suit you." He smirked, taking off the condom and tossing it haphazardly on the counter beside her before securing his member back in its confines.
Her mouth fell open in shock, as if she'd been slapped in the face. Feeling like a whore had felt incredible in the moment, but once it passed, she felt even more worthless and alone than before.
He knew his words hurt her, yet he didn't make a move to retract them. After all, he was a bastard in every sense of the word and no one; not even the girl he couldn't get off his mind, was going to change that.
So he walked away, without even a second glance. All the while burying the unfamiliar urge deep in his heart to run straight back.
Present Day
"This feels so wrong." Brooke whispered a few tears streaking down her porcelain cheeks, cheeks that hadn't been dry for more than thirty seconds since Haley's accident one week before.
Holding up a picture of Haley and him in mid scream as they propelled down a roller coaster, Lucas offered Brooke a sad nod. It was wrong, being surrounded by Haley's things, her possessions, and knowing she wouldn't walk into the room any minute with a smile that warmed his heart like no other was something he didn't think he'd ever come to grips with.
Dabbing at her eyes with a tissue off Haley's computer desk, Brooke went to take the frame from Lucas. "I'll get these, why don't you work on some of her books and music. She and I never did see eye to eye on that stuff. Remember all those fights you had to referee…" Her voice trailed off. If she finished her thought, she'd break down in sobs again.
"Yeah, ok." Lucas agreed walking to Haley's cherry wood bookshelf, his hand immediately finding the book he'd given her for her sixteenth birthday. He'd definitely have to read a few passages to her later.
Flipping through the worn pages, a smile came to his face as he remembered every detail of the moment he gave it to her. Reaching the last page, he made a shocking discovery—a key—held in place by a single piece of clear tape.
Confused and curious Lucas quietly removed the key from under the tape and slipped it into his front pocket of his tan colored army jacket, a staple of his current wardrobe along with his recent affection for plaid shirts.
"Lucas?"
Turning around he saw his girlfriend holding a single loose photograph. "What's wrong?"
She handed him the photograph. "I found it behind a photo of Haley and me on her vanity mirror."
Looking at the photo Lucas immediately recognized the curly blonde wrapped in a friendly embrace with Haley, at what looked like a concert, as Peyton Sawyer.
Peyton Sawyer was one of his brother's best friends. While Brooke, Haley and Chase had always surrounded Lucas; Nathan had been by Peyton, Jake, and Tim.
Jake had truly been Nathan's best friend since birth. Peyton had come along around fifth grade and while Nathan and Tim were hesitant of letting a girl into their inner circle, they couldn't really object when Jake fell head over heels for her.
The end of their sophomore year, however, every thing changed. Jake had been suffering from chronic headaches since junior high and after collapsing at the playoffs, an inoperable tumor pressing against his brain stem was discovered. They gave him three to six months to live. He died four months later at Tree Hill Hospital with Peyton, Nathan, and his parents by his side.
Nathan and Peyton were never the same. Watching someone they loved die bonded them, but it was a bond that was laced with darkness. Both retreated into their own bitter lonely worlds; Peyton in her art and Nathan in his mindless partying and basketball.
In addition, even Lucas's relationship with Nathan shifted. He used to always be able to break through Nathan's walls, see beneath his hard exterior, but Jake's death changed all that. They still hung out and did all the things brothers do, but there was always something missing, something Lucas wasn't sure if they'd ever get back.
"Why would Haley have a picture of her with Peyton? Have they even spoken more than two words to each other?" Brooke broke through Lucas' thoughts.
"I have no clue." Lucas answered truthfully. Sure Haley knew Peyton in passing and they maybe had even talked a bit when they crossed paths at the Scott house before Jake was diagnosed, but afterwards Peyton never came to the house and she was two years older so they definitely didn't associate at school. Hell, he was pretty damn sure once Peyton went to Duke she barely came back to Tree Hill, so it's not like they would have ran into each other.
His head was really starting to spin.
…
Hearing a noise, Nathan looked up to find Peyton slowly making her way towards him, fear radiating off her usual detached features.
Noticing Chase's confused stare across from him, Nathan stood and met Peyton half way. "Come on, I'll take you to see her." He whispered low enough for Chase not to hear, then lead Peyton around the corner to take the long way to Haley's room.
When they reached the door to Haley's private room, Peyton halted and began to back away. "I can't."
Nathan didn't need an explanation. He was shocked as hell Peyton had actually shown. After losing her mother at the age of eight, then losing the boy she'd loved at sixteen, Peyton had swore to never set foot in a hospital again and he didn't blame her.
His track record hadn't been much better. His own mother had died in this very hospital and he'd witnessed Jake disintegrate, right along with her, until there was nothing left but a soulless body.
Time would never heal those wounds.
"How did you do it?" Peyton quietly asked, wanting to know the secret to Nathan's courage.
Nathan faced the small window in the door to Haley's suite, which her parents had insisted on, the same parents that had left after only four days. Apparently, Haley passing the apnea test was a good enough reason for them to return to their other responsibilities. Never mind that their daughter was in a coma and may never come out.
"I love her, I won't leave her." He answered softly, his voice thick with emotion. "Never."
Going to stand beside him, Peyton placed a hand on his shoulder. "Is anyone asking questions?"
He released a heavy sigh. "Brooke and Chase have been giving me a few odd looks here and there, but no one's said anything. They probably think I'm here to support Lucas."
"All that matters is Haley knows why you're here."
Turning his head towards her, he found sincerity in her eyes, but it did nothing to alleviate his guilt. "I said so many things I wish I could take back, so many things I didn't mean. What if…"
"Don't say that." She quickly stopped him. "She's going to come back to us…she has to."
Peyton couldn't lose another person she loved and neither could Nathan. Without Haley, he would have no life, no heart. And while their relationship wasn't simple by any means, Peyton knew they were the real deal and that gave her cynical heart a reason to believe this world wasn't as doomed as she once thought.
Putting her hand on the door handle, Peyton took a deep breath.
Nathan moved out of her way. "You need to do this alone. I'll get us some coffee."
"Thanks." She smiled weakly before entering Haley's room, the familiar sound of a heart monitor sounding around her, bringing the memories of losing Jake even further to the surface. She had to do this, though, for Haley.
Taking the few steps to Haley's bedside Peyton observed her fragile yet angelic appearance, wanting so bad for Haley to open her eyes and demand she be released from this depressing place.
Glancing around, Peyton took notice of the enormous amount of roses in the room. 'Didn't they know Haley hated roses?'
Then there was the massive collage on the wall in front of her. Pictures of Haley and Brooke Davis shaking their pom poms, Haley and Chase locked in each other's arms and last but not least Duke medical memorabilia stuck in between. All of which she figured were supposed to aid in the efforts in getting Haley to come back to her life.
The ironic thing was, all this was probably driving Haley further away, keeping Haley on the bottom of that ocean floor. Why would she want to come back to a life that was suffocating her, to a life that she was living for everyone else?
She wouldn't and that terrified Peyton.
"How's it going fellow music junkie?" Peyton took Haley's right hand in hers. "You're right, stupid question. When you wake up you can slap me for it." She joked, receiving only silence in return.
"Listen, you are probably the only one besides Nathan that knows my darkest secrets and vice versa. So, I know you didn't go into that water willingly. You'd never do that to us. Just don't give up though. You can beat this, I know you can. Don't use it as an excuse. Don't use it as a sign you're time is up, because it's not. If anything it's a sign that life is too short and you need to go after what you want. You're entire life, the life you're meant to live is waiting for you." She paused when Haley's autonomic IV switched on.
"And the biggest part of that life is with Nathan. He can't live without you Hales. For the last two months he's barely existed and he hasn't left the hospital since the accident. I don't even think he's had a decent shower or shave and you know the boy is usually anal about his appearance, so that should tell you a lot." She cracked a smile knowing Haley would too if she could.
"But in all seriousness, he's a wreck Haley. He's carrying around so much guilt and so much love that he's about to lose it. He won't even expose y'alls relationship and earn his rightful place by your bedside because he doesn't think he deserves it…and no one else does either. He sits in the shadows while everyone else, who thinks they know you, spends every waking moment urging you back. You know that's not fair Haley. So you have to wake up and make things right for the both of you. Because if you die, he does too."
The door opened behind her and Lucas Scott walked into the room, a mix of confusion and intrigue on his face. "Peyton?"
Giving Haley's hand a final squeeze, Peyton faced Lucas. "I was just leaving."
She went to move past him, but he moved blocking her path. "Wait…why are you here?"
"Um, for Nathan. He wants to be here for you and I just wanted to check up on him." She fought the urge to roll her eyes at her lame attempt at an explanation.
Lucas wasn't convinced in the least. "So, you decided to come into Haley's room uninvited, hold her hand, and from what I saw from the window, have a very intense talk with her just for Nathan?"
"Look, I didn't mean to cause any trouble. I'll be going now."
He locked eyes with her. "Peyton…please."
Maybe this was it—her way to help Haley come back. "Meet me at the Rivercourt in an hour."
Before he could even say thank you she was gone. Leaving him alone with his best friend, a best friend that he feared he didn't know at all.
Cath