Harry Potter and the Godfather Crisis
Summary: To Sirius, Remus is the love of his life, an obsession, and an unreachable goal. When Light denied him the one thing he really wanted in life, Sirius turned to Voldemort. Now, with the Dark Lord's new demand, Black may finally get what he wanted.
Chapter rating: PG-13 for sexual innuendos, one line at the end toes the line (no pun intended)
Pairing: SBxRL, with minor DMxHP and JPxLE
Warning: yaoi, violence, lemon (this story will contain gay relationships, so if you don't understand the implications, please refrain from reading)… the non-con bit was over in chapter 2
Type: AU, romance, drama
Disclaimer: Harry Potter is property of J.K. Rowling, Bloomsbury Publishing Plc, Raincoast Books and others.
Chapter 3: The Silver-eyed Anomaly
"Let go!" Remus tugged hard at his hand, which was currently enclosed in Sirius' vice-like grip. They were going to see Voldemort, or at least, some prominent Death Eater, and the very thought made him sick to his stomach.
The halls of Voldemort's hide-out was unexpectedly cheerful, despite the fact all the portraits that stared critically at him were dressed in Slytherin green. The floor swayed to a gentle, almost non-existent rhythm that Remus had gotten used to after a while.
They had crashed down in a room with a ring of Death Eaters surrounding them, wands drawn. There had been a sense of deja vu, only this time, Remus was the one outnumbered nearly ten to one, wandless and scared. He had nervously licked his lips, eyes flickering from one hooded figure to another.
"Good morning," Sirius had grinned, picking himself off the ground and pulling Remus with him. It was amazing how much grace he possessed despite having landed in a clump of arms and legs on the floor. "I trust that you will inform Lord Voldemort for me that the mission was a complete success. And you will inform division three that they owe me three galleons each."
Then something had dawned on Remus; the wizards present… had ridiculously weak magical auras. None of the more prominent dark wizards had been present. Could this mean something? Perhaps there were no strong wizards available. What had Voldemort been up to lately?
And more importantly, where was their spy?
Remus stumbled, too caught in his own thoughts to pay attention to his footing. Something irked him about the place. These halls… they seemed somehow familiar. Long, crooked, with tiny corridors that grew off on either side like a splintered branch.
He had a headache, a dull throb in his head that prevented him from thinking properly.
He blinked. Sirius had stopped walking and stood with his back towards him. From behind, there was a certain tension in the taller man's crunched shoulders. For a moment, he looked lonely, even with the jovial light dancing across his black hair. Remus didn't want to think how Sirius had survived the last five years, probably as cut off as he was. He contemplated what to say but Sirius turned abruptly.
"Listen, Moony," his voice was low, all laughter gone. "This isn't the Order. Without me here, any of the Death Eaters will kill you any chance they get." He released Remus' wrists to run a hand through tawny hair that was as soft as he remembered. Remus backed away, mouth set in a thin line. The headache only grew worse.
"Better them than you," he said finally. "At least they are not hypocrites."
"Moony, we're all hypocrites," Sirius snorted. "All the Death Eaters boast about things they've never actually done. All of us say things we don't truly mean." He folded his arms. "Which is why you need to stay by my side at all times."
"I fail to see the connection."
Suddenly, Sirius was before him, arms gripping his shoulder tightly. Remus swallowed, the sudden movement was like a hammer inside his skull.
"They swore that they'll stay away from you," Sirius hissed. "But knowing this bunch, there's no trusting that. Moony, listen. I know you're not afraid of them, but what if they cast Legilimens? Veritaserum? Are you about to give away every secret Dumbledore's ever told you? If, Merlin forbid, you're Prongs' secret keeper, you better think about others before acting rashly."
"You let me worry about that, Black," Remus shoved the other away, knowing full well that if Sirius really tried, he could easily overpower him.
It was true, he would die before revealing where James was. However, he wasn't even the secret keeper anymore. "I wouldn't have been made secret keeper if I can't defend myself."
"I'd like to see you defend yourself when faced with a billion Death Eaters," Sirius snarled. "You have no idea-" He cut himself off. Remus stared at him in confusion as he tried to collect himself. A moment passed before a slow smile crept up his handsome face. "Moony, I'll tell them about the spy."
Remus felt a chill. Spy… Snape. "I have no idea what you are talking about."
Sirius smirked. "I'll tell Voldemort about Snivellus, Moony. How long do you think he'll last? Unless, of course, you've changed your mind."
"Bastard," Remus' eyes flashed. "That was low, Black, even for you."
"Anything for you, Moony," Sirius grinned. "First order, don't move." Before Remus could wonder about what Sirius meant, several things happened simultaneously.
A hand grabbed his wrist and pulled him closer to the taller man, whose lips fastened over his mouth. Remus didn't have time to react as a tongue forced its way in, easily defeating his own unprepared tongue and tangling it in a domineering kiss.
"Mmmph!" Remus yelped into the deep kiss as he was lifted off the ground, head angled for better access to his mouth. Sirius smirked into their locked lips, and the arms around him tightened.
It was a moment before Remus found the state of mind to push himself away, and Sirius released him from the kiss with a grin. He shifted the smaller body against his, carried in bridal fashion, and resumed his trek.
Sirius laughed when Remus protested. "I thought it was customary to carry the bride into the house. We're basically married, Moony."
"I said, 'let go,'" Remus said angrily. His life looked thoroughly bleak. Werewolf mating is like a marriage without the possibility of divorce, one of his old books had said. It is the ideal situation for abusive relationships. That is why the laws banned them, even though they will make previously vicious werewolves docile.
"Sure thing, Moony," Sirius said gently. "Just remember what I said about Snivellus." To his surprise, he was slowly lowered down, and his wrist was taken again. This time, Remus allowed himself to be led down the hall. A new sense of helplessness washed over him. How was he even supposed to know if Snape was still safe? For all he knew, the spy had already been found out and Sirius was just using this as leverage.
They turned down another hall, and Remus again felt that tickle at the back of his mind. He had been here before! He was sure of it. But… why would he have been at Voldemort's hiding place? The discomfort had now traveled down and there was an uneasy feeling in his stomach. For a moment, he fancied that the ground had lurched.
"Where are we going?" He blurted out.
He wasn't expecting an answer, and wasn't expecting it when Sirius whirled around, with a smile that couldn't have been brighter if Christmas had come early. "We need to go get our wounds taken care of, then report to Voldemort. And we need to go home soon."
"Home?" Remus echoed in disbelief. "We need to go home?"
"Of course," Sirius said cheerfully. "I need to check on my cousin and Malfoy's brat. They moved in next door, and I wouldn't trust Malfoy Junior to keep himself alive for more than a couple hours. We also need to think of a way to get your things."
Remus didn't know if it was the way it was said, like living with Sirius was already a fact, but he suddenly felt cold. For a moment, he considered running away just to find somewhere quiet, where he could break down and cry. It was hard being cold to Sirius, and it was hard pretending to be strong. He closed his eyes tightly. He could sense an oncoming conflict deep inside him. Merlin, he did not want to lose control when he faced Voldemort.
They were silent the rest of the way, with Sirius stopping to talk to the occasional Death Eater. Remus could feel sneering gazes upon him and couldn't help but lower his head. Fist clenched at his side, he stuck close to the walls and pretended not to hear when Sirius fended off the infrequent "He's as pretty as I imagined, good eye, Black." or the doubtful "You sure he's worth seven years? He doesn't look like he could take much."
On some level, Remus was grateful that Sirius only answered with a simple "Thank you," or "You have no idea."
"Don't worry, I'll make sure he lasts," Sirius' last remark made Remus snap his head up. Sirius wasn't even looking at the Death Eater talking to him, but at another black cloaked figure standing on the other side of the hall, eyes lit in both triumph and revulsion.
Remus followed his gaze. The black cloaked figure noticed him, and pushed his hood down to reveal unnaturally pale skin and a cold, unfeeling face. Remus felt his eyes widen in shock, then in relief. It was Snape, still undiscovered.
A look passed between them, two allies both virtually prisoners in a sea of enemies and strangers. Instinctively they noted the other's welfare critically, satisfied that there were no outward signs of injury.
Sirius seemed to notice the little exchange and angrily pulled Remus closer to him. "Later Igor," he said courtly. "I've got to report back to Lord Voldemort."
That was when Remus noticed the wizard he had been talking to. Igor Karkaroff. His memory clicked.
Durmstrang! This place was the School of Durmstrang! Before Dumbledore found him, he had been thinking of a teaching job and came for an interview. However, the staff had shooed him out the door before he made it into the main office. He still remembered the strange winding halls. That would explain why the school rocked from side to side!
The school had been built virtually on water, and the result was no different from being on a ship. And the nausea Remus was feeling was sea-sickness.
But- how had they hid it from the students and other teachers?
Sirius came to a stop before the infirmary. "I've changed my mind," he proclaimed suddenly. "You go get your wounds looked after while I report to Voldemort. It saves time."
"Um…" Remus looked adorably confused. "No it doesn't, Pa-" He cut himself off in time, instead settling for an uncertain glance at the closed door.
"Anyways, Voldemort will have my hide if I'm late," Sirius clapped a hand on Remus' shoulder. A stab of pain ran through him when Remus flinched and backed away. "Go on in."
It took every ounce of Sirius' willpower to keep himself in place as Remus vanished behind the door. He wanted nothing more than to race after him, sweep him up in a tight embrace and never let go. The thought of anyone other than him exposing the smaller man's soft, pale skin, even for medical purposes, nearly drove him insane. However, asking Remus to meet Voldemort with him was asking too much.
He fingered his Dark Mark, which was beginning to smoke, sending waves of pain through him. "Damned impatient bastard," he muttered. "Can't a man take care of his wounds first?"
Perhaps it was better if Remus went in alone. What faces him on the other side of the hospital door should probably be faced alone. If Sirius was there with him, there would be very little healing done at all.
All too soon, he was before the Dark Lord's study again. Voldemort's new study had a different decoration from last time, and now everything seemed to be shrouded with a curtain of misty red. There was a hint of crimson in the walls.
He knocked courtly on the door.
"Come in, and bring the werewolf with you," Voldemort's pleasant voice seeped through the door. Sirius shivered. It was right to leave Moony at the hospital, he told himself. No telling what Voldemort will do.
The Dark Lord was smiling as he entered the room. For a moment, both stayed silent. Blue-starred ceilings and walls wore a faint tint of red. There was a small stain of blood that Voldemort had not bothered to clean beneath his feet. Sirius stepped to one side.
"Yes my Lord?" Sirius waited, but Voldemort did not gesture for him to sit down.
"Where is the werewolf?" Voldemort asked, eyes slightly narrowed.
"Right here," Sirius answered. Suddenly, his Dark Mark burst into flames. Crying out, he stumbled backwards, clutching his arm to his side. The fire died down as quickly as it came, and Sirius drew in a shaky breath. He collapsed into the nearest chair, arm cradled protectively against his chest.
He stared at Voldemort with slight apprehension. There had been no forewarning, no wand held outward, no whispered spell, not even a flicker in the dark wizard's eyes. There was no question which one of them would win in a duel.
"Kindly answer the question, Sirius," Voldemort smiled as if nothing had happened. "Where is Lupin?"
"At the infirmary," Sirius gritted his teeth. "You asked about a werewolf. My Lord, I am one of them now." His breathing had calmed, but his hand still hovered nervously beside his Dark Mark, in case the unpredictable Voldemort decided to set him on fire again.
"Ah, I apologize, I had misunderstood," Voldemort said. "I had thought you meant to hide the werewolf from me. If that is not the case, send for him. I have a great desire to see this so-called moonchild."
Sirius didn't answer.
"Or should I take this as an indication, Black," Voldemort continued idly. "As soon as you'd gotten what you wanted, serving me becomes second priority? You'd like nothing better than to go back to those muggle lovers, betraying those that helped you in your direst moment?"
"No, my Lord," Sirius said quietly. "I would still serve you."
"Of course," the older man pulled a loose strand of dark hair behind his ears. "I was the one that gave the moonchild to you. He is also mine to take away."
Sirius felt his expression harden. He wouldn't dare touch Moony. He swore. "Honor your promise, my Lord," he said stiffly. "And I'll keep my word with you."
Back at the Infirmary
Remus couldn't help but feel nervous as he entered the brightly lit hospital. What Death Eaters would be waiting for him there? Was Sirius stupid enough to actually expect him to accept care given by Voldemort's cronies?
He decided that even if he didn't have his wand, he could still give any Death Eater a few broken teeth.
"Hello, how can I help?" the strangely familiar voice asked. A face still barely rid of baby fat poked around the curtains. Familiar blond hair and a slightly chubby cheeks stared out at him, eyes small and watery.
Remus gasped, the world spinning around him. "You-" he breathed. "It… I thought you-"
The other party wasn't much better off. The years had not been kind to Peter Pettigrew. While they had given Sirius another two inches in height and an even more handsome face, it had stolen the thin layer of blond hair that once stood atop Peter's head. He was as short as ever and there were wrinkles under his eyes. The other young man looked, if possible, even more tired than Remus was.
"M-Moony…" Peter stammered, eyes impossibly wide. "Wha- what are you doing here?"
Remus didn't hear him. "I thought you were dead…" He whispered. Defenses broke. After seven years, memories of Peter was like a faded image in a lake, there only if the sun shines in the right place. "Wormtail… you…"
"It's good to see you, Moony," Peter said quietly. "I though- that I'd never see any of you again… Not even Padfoot comes here much anymore." At Remus' silent daze, he grew nervous again. "Right, so um… sit on that bed. Are you hurt then? Why are you here?"
Numbly, Remus sat. Peter folded back his long robe and began to inspect a particularly nasty bruise on Remus' left arm, frowning as he did. It was amazing… seeing Peter alive, with a finger missing from his left hand. He stared dully as Peter cast a simple healing spell, then moving on to another wound. Emotions bubbled up through him. Finally, it boiled over.
"But you're dead!" he cried. "Padfoot killed you! We all saw it in the papers! Nymphodora saw you! And all the muggles-"
"That's because… I-I didn't want anyone to hate me, alright?" Peter said with difficulty. "So I faked it. It was just better that way. You'd all remember me as a marauder. You and Prongs. Prongs especially. I wouldn't have been able to stand it if any of you hated me."
A cold chill ran through Remus' chest. "Wormtail…" He said. "Let me see your arm."
"Moony-"
"Wormtail, please, I need to see your arm." Remus grabbed onto Peter's robes as the other backed away in near panic. There was little doubt, but Remus had to see for himself to be sure-
He pulled up Peter's sleeve to reveal a black skull with a snake wound around it. In the bright light, the Dark Mark looked ridiculously harmless, much like the common tattoos that some muggles have. However, Remus could feel the intense dark power lurking behind those black lines.
"Wormtail…" Remus' head felt strangely light. Of the old marauders, two had became Death Eaters. Where did it go wrong? What had happened to their friendship, the pranks they played? The oaths they had sworn to each other without saying a word?
Peter promptly burst into tears. "I never- never wanted you to k… know," he blubbered. "Pl… please don't let Prongs know… Just… let him think I've d… died."
"Why," Remus whispered, biting his lips. "It's Voldemort, we… weren't we going to become aurors together? Weren't we going to be the best of the best, like Padfoot always said?"
Peter shook his head, and buried his face in the white hospital blankets. Remus could see the other boy's shoulders quivering. Seven years ago, he would've thrown his arms around his friend and said something ridiculously funny that they ended up laughing on the floor. He turned away, pressing a hand against his closed eyes. He tried to concentrate on breathing as Peter began to stammer.
"I… I wasn't strong like the rest of you," Peter choked out. "When I left Hogwarts I… saw this group of people… they were so str- strong… and rich… They just had so much control over themselves. I- I thought I could be like that Moony.
"Then they told me that I was a… pureblood and one of them. That I was part of… something b… bigger."
Remus glanced at him as Peter raised his tear-stained face up at him. There was helplessness in his eyes.
"I know I had relied so much on the rest of you that- it m… meant a lot to me to belong. By the time I… realized it was wrong… I'd… too far." He faltered. Remus placed a hand on the other man's shoulder. "I can't get out, Moony… None of us can. He'd k… kill us! He'd destroy everything we'd… ever loved."
"Wormtail… it's alright…" Remus swallowed. "You've been their mediwizard, haven't you? You haven't killed anybody."
"You don't get it," Peter jerked himself away, stomping off to get his records. Angrily, he wrote Remus' name at the top of a blank sheet. When he returned, his face was hard. "I gave away where Prongs was."
"What?" Remus didn't quite understand.
Before Peter could reply, the door slid open. They both look up and the conversation died at the tips of their tongues. Sirius Black had just entered the infirmary. His lips were tightly set, and he gingerly lowered himself down beside Remus, who was too overwhelmed to care. Thin lips stretched into a grimace. "I need my arm looked at."
"P- Padfoot!" Peter squeaked, all the toughness he had obtained in the earlier moment was gone. "This is- a surprise-"
Sirius ignored Peter. Instead, he fixed his unnerving gray eyes on Remus' face. "What he means is that, unlike the Daily Prophet would have you believe, I was not the one that gave Prongs to Voldemort."
Peter whimpered at the name. He busied himself with the various cuts on Sirius' arm. Part of Sirius' robes seemed burnt off, revealing a Dark Mark with tiny blisters around it.
"But you were their secret keeper," Remus said. "Prongs asked you. Unless… it- it was Wormtail. Unless you switched, without telling me-"
Sirius nodded, eyes never leaving Remus'. He brought his had up to cup his mate's face. Remus pulled away. "Yes, it was Wormtail."
It was as if the sky collapsed over his head. The expression on Remus' face was so horrified, so vulnerable, and Sirius leaned in without thinking. He pulled the smaller body tightly against his and felt an ache when there was no resistance. It wasn't because Remus accepted him… but because he wasn't capable of resisting.
"I couldn't refuse," Peter spoke up desperately. Remus' eyes were slightly glassy as he rested his cheek against Sirius' shoulder. "Prongs was all earnest, and you guys ask me favors so rarely… I knew I was a D-D-Death Eater, but-"
"You?" Remus asked softly, haunting eyes dimmed. "You gave Prongs away? You were the one that betrayed us…" Sirius buried his face against the smaller man's neck, holding on tighter as if that could shield him from all the harm in the world.
He breathed in the slightly sweet scent of Remus' hair, trying to enjoy the moment as long as it lasted. Finally, he decided to clarify. "Wormtail got in that pansy Dolohov's way and was put under the Cruciatus curse for nearly half an hour. He was rambling by the end and was found out. The bastard told Voldemort about it and blackmailed Wormtail into framing me."
"Dolohov? As in Antonin Dolohov? That Death Eater that was sent to Azkaban?" Remus regained his mind and pushed Sirius away again. The black haired man tried to hide his disappointment.
"One of my more ingenious moments," His smile turned positively malicious. "I dropped him off at Lockhart's. Remember that Hufflepuff that was only good at memory charms? You should've seen his face when Dolohov fell through his chimney."
Remus blinked, trying to imagine that and failing.
"He screamed like a bloody girl and started shooting Obliviate in every direction. That was why Dolohov couldn't remember a thing when they questioned him on trial." Sirius laughed.
"And now Lockhart's claimed as a hero! I mean, have you read his books?" Remus said in stunned horror. "So really you were the one who turned Dolohov in."
"He was a useless Death Eater anyway," Sirius said dismissively. He sneaked a look sideways at the delicate face framed by tawny hair and was promptly mesmerized. Remus flinched as an arm was wrapped possessively around his waist. Peter's eyes went wide, anxiously looking from one marauder to the other. The atmosphere had abruptly changed.
Remus tried to stand, but Sirius tightened his grip and gave a sharp tug. Anybody else might've fallen onto his lap, but Remus was a werewolf. "What are you doing?" he demanded, bracing his feet against the white stone floor.
"What- what are you- doing, Padfoot?" Peter echoed.
"Hmm?" Sirius stood up as well, enjoying how he was an entire head taller than his mate. Merling, Remus was so beautiful… face flushed with anger and embarrassment. This was what he wanted… wasn't it?
"Moony's my mate. I'm allowed to do this." Sirius' words were as much directed at himself as at Peter.
"You're out of your mind! Let me go!" Remus struggled. What had happened? Just a moment ago, they had been acting like the gap of seven years was nothing, like they were marauders again. And now-
"Kiss me," Sirius ordered, staring deep into golden eyes. The force behind their bond hummed in the back of his head. For a moment, Remus looked fearful, and small hesitant arms locked around his waist. Sirius swooped down as his mate slowly raised his head upwards.
There was a thrill… Remus was accepting him! Perhaps it only happened because of the bond, but the acceptance shot straight into Sirius' heart. Their faces were so close… and Sirius could see those beautiful golden eyes fixed on him.
The white scarf inside his pocket spilled out, draping itself against the bed. Remus' eyes left him for a moment as he saw the scarf. Then the kiss was turned away. "No," he gasped, a hint of panic in his voice. "No, I'm not- going to kiss you."
And it seemed as if the world had just broken in half. All the warm feelings in Sirius chest seemed to be washed away. The arms by his waist fell away. He snatched the scarf up furiously.
"But we just established that I didn't kill Wormtail, nor did I betray Prongs," Sirius growled. "You're mine and there's no way around it. Why can't you just accept me?"
Peter was completely lost, looking between his two former friends. He was… obviously out of his league.
"If you don't know," Remus gritted his teeth. "Then don't bother. You don't know anything, Sirius."
"We'll talk about this at home," Sirius said gruffly, cutting him off. At least, he told himself, Remus had called him Sirius. Not Black, Sirius. That was better, wasn't it?
Ignoring Remus' struggles, Sirius pressed a quick kiss against the werewolf's lips and turned to Peter. "I'm using your floo, alright?"
Peter nodded dumbly, too scared to speak up.
Home
"Why did you do that?" Sirius said slowly. "You were going to kiss me, so why did you resist? Why do you- deny the bond?"
Remus' teeth tightened. He didn't plan on answering Sirius' question. When he saw the scarf… it brought back that same snowy day when they were all just children. There had been no lust, no complications. At that moment, they were just marauders…
So he resisted, fought the bond with everything he had. And he had won. Remus never knew triumph could feel so horrible.
"I love you, Moony," Sirius reached for him. "I don't want to hurt you."
Hurt? But… it was too late. Remus looked away. Why did he feel like crying? It was just another statement. Sirius had said it himself… all Death Eater's are liars.
No! He can't cry. He didn't even lose much of his calm when facing Peter, who was supposed to be dead! He can't cry in front of Sirius. He had to leave, surely there was a bathroom in this house where he could turn on the tap to hide his sobs. Or at the very least, he had to make sure Sirius didn't see him.
Turning, Remus was about leave when Sirius spun him around and locked him into their tightest embrace as of yet. Remus stopped, stunned for a moment, before realizing his situation and the confining heat of the arms around him.
His hands fisted in Sirius' robe and he pushed on the other's chest, trying to maintain what little distance there was between them. "Let go!" He said hoarsely. "Black, I need some time alone."
Sirius ignored him. Remus didn't know what he needed or wanted. Pulling forward, he rested his chin in the soft downy hair and weaved his hand through it. He was a head taller than Remus, and it was easy to securely hold the smaller man against him like this. This… this felt safe. When Remus was this close to him, he could be sure that, at least for the time being, nothing was going to hurt the one he loved.
It was warm… but Remus knew he didn't want this. "I don't want to see you right now."
"Then close your eyes," Sirius whispered. "Just… just shut up for a moment. Don't you… feel anything?"
They were too close… Remus didn't stop struggling. Even as the first tear slipped down his cheeks. No! Sirius would see! He can't know how weak he really was. They were enemies…
"You're crying."
"No, I am not," Remus forced out, hating the tremor in his voice. "I'm warning you. Let me go."
At that Sirius grew angry again. "Damn!" He loosened his arms and allowed Remus to push them apart. His heart was thudding painfully. "What do I have to do? What does it take, Moony?"
Remus stumbled backwards, trying to stop himself from crying. "You- you've never known what true love is."
"I don't?" Sirius raged. "Seven years, Moony! Don't you dare tell me I don't know what true love is."
"Seven years, seven years, that's all I hear from you!" Remus bit his lips. "Love isn't measured in years! Do you remember telling Snape about my werewolf form in sixth year?"
"Oh so this is about him, is it?"
"No this isn't about Snape!" Remus wiped a hand across his eyes, swallowing thick lumps down his throat. "You and Prongs have always hated him. But Lily and he had been friends-"
"Get to the point!" Sirius snarled.
"Prongs saved Snape, Padfoot! For Lily!" Remus cried. "Lily liked Snape more than him then! But Prongs still saved him! That's what true love means. You wouldn't be able to do it! If I did like someone better than you, you would have killed them yourself."
For a moment, Sirius had nothing to say. Remus was right. Remus knew him too well, knew his every habit, every fault… So that was what it took.
But how could he change… when the mere thought of Remus smiling at someone else drove him insane with jealousy? And whenever somebody else mentioned that precious name, he tensed and immediately became defensive?
"I-"
"Sirius Black," Remus forced out. "I loved you once. I'm not going to make the same mistake again."
"Let's… go upstairs…" Sirius whispered. He was an idiot. He had assumed that Remus just didn't know how he felt… He'd assumed that if he showed Remus that their mating… and their bond wasn't purely based on physical attractions, he would be accepted.
Sirius was unable to look into Remus' bright eyes, knowing that Remus understood the depth of his feelings… and that it wasn't enough.
Remus nodded courtly. Trying to control his conflicting emotions. There… he'd said it. He'd finally told Sirius how he'd felt. What he didn't say was that once upon a time, he wouldn't have cared as long as he was with Sirius. But that trust had been broken once.
That wasn't going to happen again.
They were silent as they made their way up the stairs. The house was far smaller than Remus would've imagined for Sirius, and there was only four doors at the top. One obviously led to the bathroom, with a small shower schedule pinned on the closed door.
Sirius opened the door at the far end and Remus swallowed. It was quite a large room, with a fancy double bed shoved against one wall. A small fireplace sat at the far end, cradled against the corner. The soft plush carpet beneath his feet was a brilliant Gryffindor scarlet. A door at the far end of the room opened to another small bath.
"This is… your room," Sirius said quietly. "I'll lock the door and you can make sure the windows are shut. I'll be going… now."
After he left, Remus had made sure that the door was locked. He checked the fireplace and found that it wasn't connected to the floo network. Exhausted, he had washed his face and crawled into bed fully dressed.
At the Headquaters
"James! Oh Merlin, James!" The redhead leaped across the banisters in one swift motion. She bounded up the small winding trail that stretched up to the small cozy home she shared with James Potter. Slightly curled hair was flung behind her in disarray as she burst through the door, breathless with distress.
"James! It's Remus!" She gasped as a bewildered man looked up from his cooking. She leaned herself against the kitchen door in exhaustion.
"What's Remus?" James asked in confusion. "Did he hurt himself during full moon or something."
Lily shook her head tearfully. "I just heard from Dumbledore. Remus was- was taken away by a Death Eater! Just- this morning!"
The chairs clattered backwards as James leaped to his feet. "You aren't serious," he gasped. "It can't be possible! Some of the best aurors and spell sensors were there! You'd think at least Alastor would've suspected something! What kind of idiot would challenge that kind of security?"
"You know who it was, James!" Lily said. After a moment, James nodded.
"I don't understand," James sucked a mouthful of air through his teeth. "Why didn't they tell us? Today at work nobody said anything! I mean, I should've known that Alastor being absent from work was strange but," he shook his head in angry disbelief, "we should've been the first people to know!"
"They didn't even tell Dumbledore," Lily slumped into a seat and laid her cool cheek against the counter. "Dumbledore only knew because he was supposed to meet Remus earlier this evening and Remus never showed up. He had threatened the Ministry into telling him what happened."
An uneasy silence fell over them. James calmed, then looked at their son, who had stopped trying to steal bread dough and was listening silently. "Harry," James said quietly. "Can you go play upstairs for a little?"
Staring at his Father, Harry reluctantly nodded and left the table, and both parents watched the short form slowly leave the kitchen with a mixture of fondness and anxiety. As soon as the boy seemed out of earshot, James spoke.
"It was Sirius, wasn't it?"
Dejectedly, Lily nodded. "Yes… single handedly. He- nobody knows how he got in, but he was just in Remus' room this morning. He disabled Alastor and left using a port key."
"Must've been animagus," James forced out. "I thought they were on the lookout for wizards in animal forms! And why would Moony go with a Death Eater?"
"Some sort of mind control…" Lily's beautiful brows knitted slightly. "The wizards and witches present said Sirius had some sort of control over Remus. Maybe…"
"You- you don't think they mated… do you?" James asked uneasily. "Moony would never accept something like that."
"James," the man looked up to find the most beautiful green eyes in the world staring in determination at him. "We're going to get him back. And if… he was mated… depending on what he wants, we'll deal with Sirius."
"Yeah…" James said tiredly. He leaned over the counter and embraced her. "They… they mean so much to me, Lily… I… losing them would be almost as bad as losing you or Harry…"
"Don't worry," Lily whispered gently. "You know as well as I do that if it's Sirius, Remus would be safe until we get there. We just have to find out where they are."
"If only I'd paid more attention to him!" James burst out. "This would never have happened. Last time I saw him, I didn't even remember when full moon was. What kind of a best friend am I? I should've seen it coming…" He looked pleadingly at Lily.
But Lily only eyed him disapprovingly. "Unless you can find a Time-Turner that takes you back more than six hours, James Potter, that kind of talk is useless. Now listen, Remus won't be kept at Voldemort's headquarters. It's too risky and Sirius would never chance it."
"Then he'd be with Sirius, in his house, most likely," James caught on. "Lily, they can't be at number 12 Grimmauld Place. It's too obvious. What other places does Sirius own? We have to check through the Ministry."
"That would give us a clue, but James, don't get your hopes up too high."
"I know, he could've purchased under a different name, or even as a muggle. His place may be as well hidden as ours, but this is the only clue we have, so we can't let it go." Jame stood up. "I think I'll floo Dumbledore right now."
"Daddy?" Before James could exit the room, Harry was blocking the door. Clutching his toy-wand in one hand, the boy looked solemnly up at James. "I know where Remus is."
Lily looked slightly annoyed. "Harry, Daddy told you to go upstairs. Why didn't you?"
"I wanted to help Remus, Mommy," Harry ran to Lily. "I know where he is. He's near that school floating on the water. Dung stank."
"Dung… stank?" Lily looked at James, both exasperated and amused. "Harry, maybe you should go to bed. Mommy and Daddy need to go talk to Dumbledore."
"Lily," James' voice was strangely quiet. "Hold on. Harry? Did you mean Durmstrang?" Harry shook his head.
"My friend said dung stank. The school floating on water for idiots."
"Lily," James quickly explained, seeing his wife's perplexed expression. "This morning, Snape owled us and told Dumbledore that Voldemort had moved his hideout to the dungeons of Durmstrang. He also said that Karkaroff is now officially a member."
"Oh god…" Lily looked as if she needed a long night's sleep. "Harry… who is this friend? When did you last see him?"
"He's not a real friend," Harry pulled himself up on Lily's lap, glad that his mother wasn't ignoring him now. "He lives in the mirror. He talks to me sometimes. You know, when Ron and the twins aren't over."
The Next Morning
Remus woke to the tense feeling that there was someone else in the room. Cautiously, he cracked his eyes open a slit. The bed was in better condition than the one at home. For a moment he was disoriented. He was in a room that was much too big… And who was in the room with him?
The light was still dim from the slanting window. A shape hovered before his bed. For a moment Remus thought it was Sirius, but the figure was… short.
His eyes snapped open as he remembered where he was and stared at the child standing by his bed. A moment passed as the two stared at each other. How did he get in? He couldn't have been more than seven years old. One of the most good looking children Remus had ever seen. Sirius… didn't have a nephew or anything… did he?
For although the boy staring passively at him had hair so blond it was almost white, and a far more aristocratic face than Sirius did… they had the same presence. Even gray eyes that made you uneasy without portraying intense emotions. Only… the boy's eyes weren't exactly gray… they were silver. Perhaps it was the lighting, but there seemed to an unearthly quality in those young eyes. This was no normal child.
Finally, the boy spoke up. "So you're the werewolf."
"Um…" Remus pushed himself up, not having an adequate answer. He moved so he was sitting on the bed facing the boy. "That's… right. Who are you?"
"None of your business," the boy replied. It wasn't meant as an insult. The boy merely stated the fact. He crossed his arms, and Remus noticed that the clothes he was wearing looked… very expensive. The silvery silk gave the boy the coloration of an angel. "Where's Black?"
Remus opened his mouth briefly before regaining his composure. "He's uh… in his room."
The boy only stared at him. "This is his room."
When Remus didn't seem to understand, the boy smirked. Remus decided right then that the boy wasn't Sirius' relative, but his clone.
"If you don't believe me, check the wardrobe. Black has things in there that not even he would put in a guest room." The boy looked as if he was enjoying himself.
Hesitantly, Remus stood and ventured to the closet. He braced himself for a moment, then slipped the two large doors open. Color flooded his cheeks and he promptly shut the doors with a clang. He turned towards the boy, heart thudding loudly.
Inside the closet, half hidden beside the formal black and blue robes, resting on some expensive muggle clothes, were several volumes of magazines. Remus only had to peek at the cover to discover what they were about. Three naked young men laid entangled upon black sheets. Not two, three.
"Saw it?" the boy asked in a slightly bored voice. "If it was a guest room, you'd think he'd hide it slightly better."
"Who are you?" Remus asked again, more insistently this time. "How did you get in here?"
"Give a message to Black for me," the child said. "Tell him my Mother is in an emergency situation and needs his help. He'll know who I am. I've got to go, Lupin." As soon as the child said that, the familiar tone speaking his name told Remus who the child was.
"You're Malfoy's son! The one that's living next door," Remus said. "No wonder you remind me of-"
There came the sound of a door being opened down the hall. The boy panicked. He glanced up at Remus and the cockiness was gone from his voice. "He'd kill me," he told Remus in a whispered hush and darted for the bathroom across from the door.
Not knowing what else to do, Remus followed. Intrigued, he watched as the boy pressed both hands to the large mirror that hung on the wall. He whispered something so quickly that Remus couldn't make out the words. Then, as footsteps began approaching Remus' room, the boy's hands began to melt into the mirror.
A key jingled in the lock behind him, and Remus stared, stunned as only a reflection of the blond, silver-eyed boy remained in the mirror. The reflection smirked a very Sirius-like smile at him, then said, "Malfoys aren't addicted to mirrors for no reason."
The door to the room opened, and Remus snapped his head around to see Sirius. As he turned back, the young Malfoy was gone from the mirror.
"Moony?" Sirius asked. "You're awake. I was so angry that I forgot to check in on Narcissa last night, so we need to pay her a visit. Come on."
Remus ignored him and looked back at the mirror. "There was a child here a moment ago, Black," he said idly. "He said his mother's in trouble."
Sirius cursed. The Malfoy brat was here? "Damned, how is he getting in? The windows and doors are locked! Yet he just comes waltzing in! What did he say to you?" He demanded. "He didn't offend you, did he?"
"No, but he told me to look in the closet."
Sirius paled as he remembered the erotic magazines. "Moony, I can explain that. Those are just-"
"You don't have to explain," Remus said calmly. "They have nothing to do with me anyways." He mind was still so otherwise preoccupied that he didn't realize the shadow of anger the crossed over Sirius' face.
Suddenly he found himself pressed against the wall, both hands pinned beside his head. Remus gasped in surprise. Sirius leaned in until his lips were less than an inch away.
"I'd been thinking about what you said last night, Moony," Sirius whispered, breath playing against Remus' mouth. "You said you won't love me again. Well, I'm going to prove you wrong."
Author's Note: I can't seem to get this chapter the way I want it to go… T-T. I don't know what's wrong with it, aside from the tone being a little different. No worries! Remus as a human is still a virgin. As to why he said that, you can see next chapter.
By the way, I was trying to make children Draco and Harry that would fit into the story that's supposed to come after this one. Were they alright? OOC I know, but were they at least likable? Please review and tell me?
Question: technically, are lemons allowed on I'd read some really erotic ones, and some milder ones, and I'm not sure which fits best in this fic. Anybody have any ideas? (It won't come for a while though)
Night Wolf Vixen: Thank you! But um… I didn't find the overall plot of this story all that dark, maybe it's the way I wrote it in the beginning chapters. (thinks) And Remus being a female werewolf is probably going to be important later on, if I decide to write in the plot concerning the pyrelings. You reviewed before the second chapter was even up. How did that happen? O.o
Can it be? Are my eyes deceiving me? It is! It's almost Sirius hate-mail. O.O… lol. Psychotic? Maybe, but I don't think he's evil. Part of how he acts will be explained later when their past at Hogwarts is revealed. Next chapter.
Apus-Equuleus: (blushes) OMG, I don't think I'd ever been so flattered in my life! You're my favorite reviewer so far. To tell the truth, I began the story to improve grammar, I'm glad it's working. And Remus is still a virgin. He just thought he was raped. That's why he doesn't have some of the touchiness and uncertainty that comes from people actually with those experiences.
Lost and by the wind grieved: Thanks!
Nightmare-chan22: Yay! I have a fan! Well, the whole werewolf thing just couldn't be glazed over, you know? And I agree, Remus is soooo pretty as a wolf.
FlamencoPenguin: Wow, Sirius is really getting on people's nerves. This is his second hate-mail. Well, Remus isn't that strong, but it's just that I kinda dislike the fics that portray him as weak willed and giving in as soon as someone snogs him.
Freya: Yup yup, you didn't misunderstand the paragraphs, but those are entirely from Remus' point of view. There will be a long flashback next chapter. I promise.
Emma Lupin: I have now come to terms with the fact that I seem to have an original story plot. O.o Thanks so much!
Andie12: I think this chapter is the longest one yet, and I still didn't get through all the content that I meant to cover. This is a relief. I thought everyone 'disliked' Sirius in this fic. When really he's just… misunderstood.
Alpha2nd2003: Funny? Hm… Remus would kill you if he heard you say that. And nah, I failed both math and physics and had to retake them in summer school. I wouldn't call that smart…
Remusnsirus4eva: I agree! They rock! And of course Remus is going to fall in love. (Hm… technically, the love is already there, they just have to um… cope)
OrA-ShiNi-gi: Right right! Wait, what am I agreeing to? I agree, poor Remus. Hate to be him… wait a moment, what am I talking about! A lot of fan girls would kill to be him! (I hope)
Potter Mania: A lot of people seems to be wondering about that. It'll all be cleared up the next chapter. You guys will definitely hate the ministry. (and NO Remus wasn't raped by anyone from the ministry)
Larka: One long chapter coming up! Or… had just come up… hm… Yup, I thought I better put the R-rated violence warning there.
YamikiofAnime: Well… not now but… um… now?
Tiff ashley: (blushes) not the best fic EVER for sure. But I've been getting a lot more reviews than I expected.
Tiffany: Well, then, here it is! (cackles evilly)
Their love is so Canon: Er… as long as I don't get blamed for your death. And um… Sirius had been with several people during the seven years. BUT I SWEAR HE'S NOT A PLAYER IN ANY WAY! And I agree with you in that, even if their love is not canon… IT SHOULD BE (cries)
Next Chapter: The Snow-flavored Scarf
Mikril-dey