Chapter 3: Push and Shove

Perhaps his favorite part of being the master of an ancient family estate was the ability to apparate directly into whatever room he wished. After the evening he'd just endured, being able to pop right into the kitchen for a much-needed cup of tea was no small blessing.

He had not expected, however, to find a certain irritatingly stubborn, attractive, and very pregnant Ravenclaw to be sitting at the breakfast bar waiting for him. Though perhaps he should have…She even made tea for Merlin's sake. But instead of thanking her, he narrowed his eyes.

"You should be in bed," he muttered coldly.

She took her time sipping gingerly from her steaming cup before she set it down with an air of superiority. "I'm pregnant, Severus, not an invalid."

"You need your rest," he pressed.

"It's not as if this one-" she gestured meaningfully at the swell of her stomach, "- would let me anyhow! Little wiggle worm won't sit still if you're not around."

He rolled his eyes, vanishing his Death Eater robes as he takes the stool beside her and begins fixing his tea.

"That's illogical," he snapped, "The baby absolutely cannot tell whether I am in the room being quiet or not present at all."

Evangeline made a disagreeing noise beside him. "A muggle baby, perhaps. Though it is quite rare, it has been documented that some magical children are especially sensitive to one or both parent's magical signatures. It's not a guarantee since they tend to grow out of it, but there have been studies that prove a connection between en utero magical sensitivity and magical prowess later in li-"

He held up a hand to stop her. "You made your point half a textbook ago."

"Oh shut up, you prat," she sighed, swatting his arm. "How did it go?"

He grunted as he stirred sugar into his tea. "As well as expected. Lucius, Theron Nott, Crabbe, Goyle, and myself may as well be leading the Renaissance. Only Crabbe and Goyle weren't put on mandatory leave, so to speak. Those of us who were are only required to be present at status meetings. We're no longer expected to be part of raids either. Our 'duty to the cause' has officially switched to raising the 'next generation' and sculpting them to best suit the Dark Lord's needs. Congratulations. You're pregnant with a madman's future soldier."

The bitterness in his tone does not go unnoticed and thought she knew it was useless, Evangeline made an effort to try and comfort him. "He won't win, Severus."

He glared at her. "I've been talking with Albus and Minerva. The chances of them helping us are slim."

Her hand, the one that had smacked him not five minutes prior, comes to rest gently against his shoulder.

"You'll still be at the important meetings. You'll still have plenty of information for them if they accept you as a spy. Do they even know that the Dark Lord has his own spy among their ranks?"

He shook his head. "No, but I also do not know his identity."

"Yet."

He stared at her. "Awfully optimistic for a Ravenclaw tonight, aren't you?"

She graced him with a smile and took one of his hands away from his teacup instead of answering. She didn't even give him the chance to ask her what she was doing before she pressed his palm against her stomach.

He was neither aware that he was holding his breath, nor that he'd gone completely still. Never in his presence had the baby so much as twitched. Evangeline claimed that when he left it was extremely active, that if he wasn't in the room the little monster thumped and kicked and took her breath away. And though he kept such thoughts to himself, he assumed it was simply because he was that off-putting to other people, even the unborn. That he was that unworthy of affection, even from his growing child. That the little one would cling to its mother but cry when he was near.

Then he felt it. It wasn't strong, but it was there. Pressure against his palm that was just enough to be felt through Evangeline's thin maternity pajamas. Just pressing, hardly moving around, but pressure against his palm nonetheless.

"Breathe, Severus," Evangeline said quietly, still smiling sweetly. "She's happy you're home."

"You don't know the gender," he managed to murmur, still unmoving. "Nor its thoughts."

"I know she's been pushing in your direction since you got here."

"Coincidence," he argued.

She rolled her eyes and gve him a look. "She can feel that you're here, Sev. Trust that."

It took him several moments to remember how to breathe consistently again. All the while he was acutely aware of every muted fidget of his child under his hand.

"What makes you think it's female?" He asked suddenly.

Her hand, still covering his own atop her stomach, squeezed his fingers. "When children show magical sensitivity early, there's a distinct pattern. Boys are exclusively sensitive to their mother's magic while girls can be sensitive to either."

He gave her a look she was used to interpreting.

"Yes, yes, I know the world isn't ruled by data and concrete patterns. She could be an anomaly, but she isn't, Sev. I know she isn't."

He didn't show that he believed her, but he did take some small comfort in what she'd told him. Most of the men he knew were selfish bastards who only loved others for their own benefit. At least with a daughter he had somewhat higher, though still slim, chances of being loved in return without an ulterior motive.

Just a few more months…He reminded himself. Then she'll start judging you for herself. Slowly, but surely she'll decide what kind of person you are and once again you won't make the cut.

"You love your Daddy don't you?" Evangeline cooed to their hands, harshly contrasting his thoughts. "He loves you too."

Severus bit back the words he wanted to throw at her. Children can't love en utero. She didn't even know who he was yet. Don't teach her to love him, let her do it on her own if she's willing. Don't make him hope for things he doesn't deserve, even if he already was.