Shikyo-Shouki's Comments and Stuff

This Story Contains: NaruSaku, One-sided NaruHina, One-sided NaruSasu, Lemons, Lime, Angst, Romance, Adventure, Blood, Action, Humor, Gore, Naruto-ness, and Sakura-ness.

OTHER PAIRINGS:

KibaHina

ChouAyame

ShikaIno/Tema.(Haven't decided what girl. Shikamaru is a player.)

I'm thinking of tossing in Ino for the competition for Naruto's heart if I put ShikaTema.

Slight InoSaku (Depends if I put Ino in the competition.)

Pairing Policy: The Pairings will not be final until they make an appearance in the story. If you want a certain pairing send a review or pm and I'll see if I'm up to it.

This Chapter Contains: Some character development, more One-sided NaruSasu, lame humor, some action. Also the word FUCK and it's many fucking uses in the english language. Some Flirting. Some Ranting.

Rating: M for lemony-ness. Also 'Big People Language' like the word FUCK. (Sorry Peeps, still no lemons.)

Disclaimer: I wouldn't be writing this if I owned Naruto would I jackass. Thanks for reminding me that I don't.

Author's Notes: I just realized how much I'll hate Kishimoto if he makes it anything, BUT NaruSaku. He knew what people were gonna think when he put that tidbit with Yamato and Sakura. That's just cruel for even giving a sliver of hope to us... -sighs- If any other male, other than Naruto, ends up with Sakura... well the Shonen Jump just lost a fan.

Retrieval of Team Hebi

(Whole)

A pair of emerald eyes opened. Sakura stiffened as she realized that the room which she was in was not her own, but relaxed on recalling the previous night. She noticed a pair of arms firmly secured around her mid-riff. She slowly unwrapped the arms from her body and got out of bed.

Sakura could of sworn she heard Naruto whimper. She looked back at him and he instantly grabbed the nearest pillow and cuddled with it. She had to hold back a laugh less she wake Naruto. Sakura had to admit that there were times when Naruto was just plain cute.

She decided she would get some breakfast with Naruto. Although, she wanted to wear somethng else than her usual ninja outfit. With some clean clothes in mind she wrote a note for Naruto and set of to her apartment.

"I can't wait to get out of here." Karin said to no one in particular.

"What makes you think that we are gonna get out of here?" Suigetsu asked.

"Sasuke-kun will come save us!" She sighed with a dreamy look on her face.

Suigetsu just looked at her like a dumbass. He looked at the guard through the steel bars once again. 'He not paying any attention. Maybe I can just...' Suigetsu pressed his body up onto the bars. He slowly liquified dripping through the bars. Jugo and Karin watched in amazement as Suigetsu made his way through the bars

Kakashi wasn't one for guard duty. Although he could read in peace when he was at the prison. So when there were no missions you could always find Kakashi reading his smut next to some jail cell. Kakashi continued to flip through the pages, but he noticed water spilling out of the bars from the corner of his eye. He continued to watch as Suigetsu began to take shape of a person, though made it look like he was still reading.

"Get back in the cell."

"Damn..."

Kakashi heard snickers from the cell.

Sasuke continued to walk down the dirt path to Konoha. He looked up at the sun. It appeared the sun was highest in the sky meaning mid-day. There was still along way to go from where he was to Konoha. He would probably get there a little after 2 o'clock.

"Naruto-kun..."

Flashback

Sasuke had been walking around the town until he happen to come upon the academy training grounds. His nine year old body wandered through the small patch of forest next to the academy. He heard the faint sounds of something hitting wood, and grunts. As he continued farther on he wandered into a small clearing.

The noise by now had stopped completely. In the middle of the clearing, a blond boy layed. His heavy breathing brought his chest up and down. Across from him was a tree with a small target. The tree itself had various scars along it's trunk. On the ground were a few shuriken and kunai. Sasuke took a closer look at the target and noticed that there were hardly and marks on it.

"You're not very good." Sasuke said smugly.

"Shut up!" Naruto yelled out. He had seen the dark haired boy in class before. He certainly didn't seem like a bad person, but was somewhat arrogant and demanding. Sasuke sat down next to the blond haired boy.

"The name is Sasuke. What's yours?"

"Naruto"

"Do you want some help?"

Naruto sat there deciding wether he should accept the help. He certainly wasn't getting anywhere hitting nothing. He sighed in defeat. "Sure, I could use the help."

The following hours consisted of more shitty throwing followed by some immense improvement. The two boys got to know a lot more about each other. After that day they became good friends. Although whenever Sasuke was around Naruto his heartbeat would quicken, his palms would become sweaty, and felt like something was missing in his life.

When he asked his mother about these small things she simply said that he was in love. Of course he freaked out when she said it. I mean he couldn't love another man right? Even then he wasn't a man, he was a child! Sasuke was to young to have confusion about sexual preference right? Wrong!

He found himself wanting Naruto. A few weeks after they became friends Itachi murder all of the Uchiha clan excluding himself and Sasuke. He told himself that he would be able to pull himself through the whole mess. Sasuke continuously assured himself that everything would be fine... as long as Naruto was there.

A week after the massacre a new girl joined the class. She had pretty pink bubble gum hair, big wide emerald eyes, and a slender figure. Sasuke loathed this girl with a passion. First, she immediately became one of his fangirls after having met Ino. Second, she recieved all the affection from the boy he loved.

Sasuke started to grow distant from Naruto slowly over time. He acted coldly to everybody he knew. Then all of a sudden they, Sasuke and Naruto, acted like rivals. Naruto always tried to best Sasuke at... something, but never really could. For as long as Sasuke he hated Sakura. Overtime he began to hate Naruto too. He still loved him just so angry that he would never love the same sex, much less Sasuke.

When Sakura asked Sasuke out, he replied crudely knowing it would get Naruto riled up. Then if by chance, they would get physical. The only form of physical contact that Naruto seemed interested. Although Sasuke hated it when Naruto would try to cheer her up because she would just put him down harder than Sasuke did to her.

In the end it was a big coincidence how the team turned out. Sasuke loved Naruto. Naruto loved Sakura. Sakura loved Sasuke.

Flashback END

He sighed, and returned his gaze to the dirt path and continued walking.

Naruto shifted in his sleep until he realized that Sakura had become extremely soft. His eyes snapped opened and realized he was cuddling with a pillow. He was glad no one saw that, but then realized that Sakura was gone. He surveyed the room, but there were no signs that Sakura was there.

His eyes took notice of a note on the nightstand to his left.

Naruto,

I went to my house to go shower, and get a change of clothes. Meet me at Ichiraku's at 1 o'clock. Don't be late kay?

Hugs and Kisses

-Sakura

Naruto's eyes turned toward the clock and squinted. '12:30' He got up to take a shower when the phone rang.

AN: I'd like to reiterate the fact that they should totally have phones. You know why? BECAUSE THEY HAVE FUCKING EAR PIECES. I'M PRETTY FUCKING SURE THEY INVENTED PHONES BEFORE EAR PIECES. I'm here sitting in my chair watchin Naruto when they fucking whip out some earpieces. I'm like 'Oh shit! Ninjas with some tech!' Then I noticed they fucking use birds for communication, and them I'm like 'WTF MATE?' So I think I now have earned the right to put fucking phones in my motherfucking story. FUCKERS!

His arm reached across the bed and he picked up the phone.

"Hello?"

"Yes Naruto... Yes Naruto!... NARUTO I'M GOING TO COME!" Sakura yelled out.

Sakura had to call Naruto that she was going to be a little late, but she ended up yelling into the phone reassuring him that she would be there.

"Naruto I'll be there don't worry. I will be there a little after 1 o'clock so go head and eat when you get there... Okay bye bye."

Sakura wanted to make sure she worded her questions correctly when she met him at the stand. She didn't just want to blurt out "ARE YOU GAY WITH SASUKE?!" No that would be somewhat mean to just accuse someone of being a homosexual, and sound like she was some freak homophobe. This was the only chance this week to talk to Naruto since she would be busy at the hospital.

As Naruto reached the front gate of the Hyuga Compound he bumped into to somebody. He fell onto his rear and heard a soft whimper. He opened his eyes and saw Hinata laying on her bottom also. Naruto got up and dusted himself off.

"Sorry about that Hinata. Didn't see you coming." His hand reached out for hers. Hinata blushed at the contact of hands, but steeled her resolve and managed to keep wake.

"No it was all my fault." In actuality, it really was her fault. Though she did it on purpose. "So where are you going?"

"To get something to eat." Naruto said.

"I'm a bit hungry myself..." Hinata said looking at the ground.

"Me to, alright well see you later Hinata!" She paled... He couldn't be that dense right? As he was running off he stopped in mid-stride. He ran back.

"Hey do you want to come?"

"I'd love too!" She almost squealed.

Sakura was walking toward Ichiraku's. It was about 1:50, maybe a little earlier. She didn't mean to take so long, but she didn't want to sound like anything but caring when she asked Naruto about his sexual preference. The thing was she didn't know why it bothered her so much. She decided not to dwell on it.

Once she arrived at the infamous ramen stand she noticed that Naruto was not alone. Upon closer inspection, she realized that Naruto's guest was Hinata. She walked into the stand.

"Hey Naruto-kun." She told herself that she didn't add the suffix because she liked him, but because she respected him so much. He was just so strong. Physically and emotionally, which seemed like a good reason to her.

Hinata averted her eyes towards Sakura. She smiled a sweet smile, but Sakura could sense some malice in it. She merely smiled back with nothing but big green eyes of innocence.

"Ohayo Sakura-chan!" Naruto called out.

"Greetings Sakura-chan. So Naruto-kun I was wondering if you could help me with some training. I want to learn some new jutsu." Hinata said, not leaving a time for a conversation to begin between Naruto and Sakura. "Of course you're not allowed to train, but I just want a few tips and pointers."

Naruto looked a little unsure, but Hinata latched onto his arm and pressed her bosom up against it continuously. Hinata was blushing furiously, and it took all her will not to pass out but she managed. Sakura didn't notice, but she was glaring one hell of a glare. Naruto himself was doing all that he could to stop the blood from his nose.

"All experienced ninja there is an attack near the jail! Three prisoners have managed to escape!"

Naruto immediately recovered from the blood rush. 'TEAM HEBI!' He dashed off to the prison.

'SHANNARO! We didn't get to ask him our questions.'

'Maybe next time.' Sakura sighed and ran off after Naruto.

Hinata was about to run off, but was stopped by a voice calling to her. "Young lady you forgot to pay."

'I forgot my wallet!

(Part 2)

Naruto was definitely in no condition to run. There was a sharp burning pain on his chest. His breathing became labored. His pace was quickly slowing. The pain from his chest was intensifying each and every second. It was similar to the pain caused by the wave of electricty sent to his body from Sasuke's sword.

As the prison came into view he dropped to his knees. The pain was to intense. He planted his palms against the dirt and continued to take shallow breaths. Suddenly there was a shadow looming over him.

Sasuke thought that it was going to be easy. Just run in and run out with the prisoners. He got by most of the average ninja with a simple genjutsu, but a surprise came to him when he found himself facing off with his former sensei at the prison. Kakashi looked a little surprised, but Sasuke could see looks of regret and sorrow.

"Sasuke..."

"Save your worthless drabbles about team ethnics Kakashi." Sasuke activated his Mangekyo Sharingan and watched as Kakashi's eyes widened.

"How.." He was going to ask how Sasuke obtained the eye, but he was cut off.

"Amaterasu."

Kakashi immediately jumped out of the way as the black flame flew past him. "It's gonna take a bit more than colored fire to take me down Sasuke."

"I wasn't aiming for you." Sasuke watched as Jugo walked out of the cell and hit a pressure point on Kakashi's neck. Suigetsu walked out of the cell taking caution not to step on the black flames.

"The great Copy-nin, Hatake Kakashi, takin' out by a push of a pressure point. Ninja these days," He sighed."just aren't as good as they used to be." Suigetsu said smugly. He planted a big kick on Kakashi's stomach before walking off to get his sword. Karin had jumped out of the cell pristinely and had been latched onto Sasuke's arm ever since.

"See! I told you you Sasuke-kun would come to save us." See I told you he would come save us.

"Hn. I need Suigetsu and Jugo." Karin looked crestfallen. Sasuke sighed. "And Karin to detect any chakra signals that might be tailing us."

"Thanks Sasuke-kun!" She beamed happily, but then noticed a familiar chakra signal. "Oh Sasuke-kun that blond guy you fought he is outside. Although he's not moving..."

"No it can't be he's dead." Sasuke's brow furrowed in confusion.

"I'm one hundred percent sure. The chakra has some contant malice feeling in it. It never wavers. That's what makes it distinct. It's him for sure." She said confidently.

Sasuke walked outside and as was told, a person was on all fours. Though this person had blonde hair which was very rare in Konoha. Sasuke walked up to the figure. The blond haired figure kept his face down as he was breathing heavily until a voice rang through the air.

"Hey teme."

"Naruto?!" Sasuke gasped. He could feel tears stinging the his eyes.

"In the flesh teme." Naruto coughed out.

"Tsukuyomi!"

"Where did you get the Mangekyo Sharingan? I thought you had to kill your best friend!" Naruto yelled out. He tried to move, but realized he was tied to a pole.

"It seems that the thought alone, of me killing you, was enough to trigger my eyes. I didn't know you were alive..."

"So, what? You here to finish the job?"

"Naruto I want you to come with us."

"What the hell? Are you crazy? Why would I do that?"

"We can be friends again! I got what I wanted and you're still alive!"

"You sure you're not on your period Sasuke because first you want to kill me then you want to make friends. What the fuck is up with you?!"

"Damnit Naruto! I love you!" With that said Sasuke closed the distance between their lips. Naruto eyes opened in shock. Sasuke frowned as Naruto was unresponsive to the kiss. He pulled away and looked into Naruto's bright blue eyes.

"Sa-Sasuke I don't know what to say. I'm not like that." Sasuke knew this would happen. His lips trembled and his body was quivering. He felt like crying. Not just for this, but for everything. "Sasuke I'm sor..."

"Kai."

"Sasuke we got to get the hell out of here before any more ninja come!" Suigetsu yelled hit a leaf ninja with the blunt side of his blade. All Sasuke did was nod. As they were running away Sasuke told himself not to look back, but he did.

He saw Sakura kneeling next to him making sure he was ok. Maybe his whole life was a mistake, but it was to late to turn back on the path he taken. He looked foward and saw that his teammates were looking at him.

"Let's head to Otogakure."

"Naruto-kun!" Sakura ran toward the said boy.

"Ugh... The ground is uncomfortable." He said as he flipped over onto his back. Once Sakura had reached him, she checked him over to see if there was any injuries. As soon as she was done...

"YOU IDIOT! YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE LOOKING FOR A FIGHT!? BAKA! BAKA! BAKA! BAKA! Don't ever do that again Naruto. Never again you got that?"

"I got it Sakura-chan. I'm kinda of tired now so I think I'll take a nap..." Naruto said drowsily

"Go ahead and rest Naruto." He closed his eyes. Sakura picked him up and carried him to the Hyuga compound.

AN: Ouch. Sorry guys I actually wanted 11 reviews for last chapter instead of 10. So no mindless sex for now. Poor Hinata got stuck with the bill. The whole 'bosom' thing was just a preview of what's to come and happen to poor Naruto. For those of you who thought Sakura was 'Coming' when she was on the phone... Well just call yourselves perverts now. Also I release the rest of the chapter tomorrow. I just got lazy sorry.

ScholarCOTA: Yes death to all who oppose. Bow down to my feet and succumb to NaruSaku! I bet you thought I was dead since I hadn't updated in a while. Also I remembered you like InoSaku, if I'm up for it I might put some in.

Terrybogard0: There put up a warning. Sakura is head med-nin, she's loaded!

TwiztidOne: It is a definite NaruSaku. NaruHina will be mainly one-sided.

animefan29: I love writing stuff that make peoples laugh! Sure she won't get the man she desires, but she'll get her one TRUE love.

GnosisMaster: If you notice the listed pairings I might put Ino in there for Naruto's heart which means the kunoichi of the rookie 9 are going to have a throwdown. Expect it to be cheap, dirty, and in a house full of breakable stuff. I think it will be somewhat similar to Crain's Ino/Saku fight from Fury, Guilt, and Love. Although we'll cross that bridge when we get to it.

OiToTheWorld: Quote "Very Interesting." Unquote. My Response: Indeed.

ref346: Perverted SON OF A BITCH! Oh wait I'm the one who suggested mindless sex. OMG I'M A PERVERTED SON OF A BITCH.

wind797: No problem just keep reviewing.

spazzgirl: LOLZ OMG! Best Quote ever! "Mindless sex is a brilliant idea!" Thanks for the review.