Elrond is assigned to a stint of drudgery in the Healing wing after a misunderstanding. The road to becoming a healer is not smooth.
Patient Beware
Second Age 80, somewhere between the morgue and the privy
Dear Elros
I acted like a total imbecile and got grounded mopping bodily fluids off the floor of the citadel's healing wing. I was just stating a fact – that one day you would be as the skull Thranduil and his guards found on the beach and dressed up to scare the carp out of Amdir's little elfling, Amroth. I borrowed the skull from the party and sat it up on a scarecrow in the grand hall to make Lord Oropher jump. However, Oropher was late this round. Aunt Galadriel and Gil-galad walked in on the skull-headed scarecrow propped up at the Council table. And everyone blamed me for the stunt Thranduil pulled on little Prince Amroth. When Gil-galad asked me why I put the skull in the seat reserved for the Edain's chief, I said you deserved to be with us in spirit.
Aunt Galadriel did her stern talking-to thing with me and I promise solemnly not to go poking about dead bodies, bones or not. Oh, and no bullying elflings. Then Gil-galad slapped me with healing-wing duties assisting the healers. Promises to Aunt Galadriel aside, I even had to assist the healers in an autopsy to try and figure out what for one of the patients. Personally, I think too much drink did him in, going by the state of the liver the master healer had me hold for a bit. I think it was pickled enough not to need an alcohol bath. Oh, I also got to help out at a surgery to remove an arrow from Thranduil's leg after a hunting accident. He could really cuss up a storm. We had to hold him down least we accidentally cut off his balls.
Brought back loads of memories of those days back in the War of Wrath. Remember when we had to hold part of Ada Maglor's gut as they rushed him into the healing tent? And that time we walked in with a water jug while His Royal Majesty Finarfin had his pants down so they could stitch up his hip? Or the time we tried to help the healers and almost took a leg off Prince Ingwion? Those were that days…
I was looking forward to a break from all that travelling but what do you know but for a plague-ship from the South to call at Lindon, sending a virulent illness through our Mannish neighbours. We are rushed off our feet tending to the sick and dying here. Nasty stuff – vomiting, loose stools, bleeding from the orifices… Not your regular flu for sure. Then they turn a sickly blue before dying. At the rate we are losing patients, we expect the Mannish population in Lindon to crash.
Excuse me, but I need to go empty someone's chamber-pot now…
Elrond
Second Age 100, Lindon
I am slowly adjusting to life being an 'only' twin. I guess I have forgiven you, brother. Remember Celebrimbor? I finally received a letter from him. He finally found a quiet corner called Hollin where he has not been chased out by neighbours waving pitchforks (often after he gifts them the very same farm-tools as a welcome gift in the first place). Aunt Galadriel feared he was going Dwarf at one stage when he hid away with some Longbeards or other Dwarf clan. Well, I do wonder how Ada Maglor is faring.
I have spent the last twenty cycles of the Sun apprenticed to a healer at Gil-galad's recommendation. He has some idea of training some soldiers with healing knowledge and I believe I am going to be their instructor once I am qualified. Not looking forward to that. I am sure that surly dwarf in Bed 3 would not mind if I bungle changing the dressing on his arm. I hear they are a hardy breed.
We were fortunate Maedhros gave us the foundation for the warrior arts. It got us through to the Second Age. Ada Maglor taught us basic healing skills just so as to keep us away from the worst of the fighting. Sure, tell the orcs healers are off-limits. That did not work, seeing we had orcs overrun our healing tents twice during the War. It's tricky when you are trying to stitch Mad Maedhros back together and he is trying to gut the nearest orc.
Less visits from Kings Amdir and Oropher now once they really got their realms up and going. Not that I miss them. Well, maybe I miss having Amroth. Kid's like a puppy at times. Thranduil, Prince of the Greenwood? Not so? It is annoying how all the women flock to him whenever he visits. It's as if he cast some sort of spell over them but Aunt Galadriel assured me this was not the case. It's his natural charisma – something which apparently Gil-galad and I lack. Note: Aunt Galadriel can be damaging to anyone's self-esteem. I recall an obscure history I came across in the library about her making the Great Feanor cry as a little girl.
Elrond
Second Age 120, Lindon
Dear Elros
Finally qualified as a Grade IV healer. That allows me to travel with the army and work in the healing tents – something we were both doing before we were even in our Elvish majority. Think old Halon passed me on purpose so he need not have to deal with me. He also wrote a letter to His Majesty recommending that I return to my former employment as his herald instead of proceeding straight to training soldiers in basic first aid. I was sure those were whoops of joy coming from the House of Healing as I left.
Okay, perhaps I did liven things up a bit when things were slow. It's not as though we have a plague every week or folks coming in after a run-in with orcs. I pulled some of our old pranks – like that farting cushion we made and left on Maedhros' chair before that war council meeting. Master Halon had to evacuate the entire ward, just like what happened back then. Halon caught me slipping red dye into the hip baths and made me wash out the chamber-pots for two weeks. Setting off a flour-bomb in the linen closet had me copying medical texts in the library. I set off another one so I could get a chance to finish reading those special art books in the restricted shelves. Would you believe they put them right next to the medical scrolls? Lucky me. I never thought there were so many different positions (some of which would require the skills of a contortionist). By Bomb no 3, Halon caught on and it was privy scrubbing for me.
I am looking forward to some time-off travelling outside Lindon and maybe I would get lucky and run into Ada Maglor. Or I might get luckier and meet that special someone I can try out those positions with. Well, one can always hope…
Darn, my first order from Gil is to saddle up and ride to some Dwarf kingdom in the mountains with Gildor Inglorion. Must get going now.
Elrond
P.S. Gildor just dropped in with one of those art books (one not really to my taste). I think he is trying to make a pass at me. I am going to Gil-galad to demand a change of travel companion immediately.
Author's Notes:
Elrond will slowly but surely mature into that Loremaster in the Hobbit and the Lord of the Rings. I will leave it up to the readers to deduce what those art books are.