I looked at Lydia angrilly and sparks of fury fell ffrom me
"I SAW WHAT YOU DID"
no no its not what it looks lik-"
"DONT TAKE THAT TONE WITH ME" and then I attacked her with my nails
"no no pLEASE" she grovelld at my power/skill and then I stopped even tho i'm related to mr collins (AN: he is a bad person)
"i'm sorry Lydia" I said and my treas came from my eyes. She got up and hugged me
"its okay I forgive you" she said, cryingly and then "youre the best, I no you didnt mean it"
now it was all over the four of us put on a movie- we watched bridget joans diarrhea which I thoutgh waz really cool cos she's posh and englesh. Often people say i'm a bit like bridget joan (AN: srsly watch this movie or els ur wurkin class). We got to a bit when she locked all cool and posh and upper class and was openning art gallerys all the tym.
Just then I got a text message on my brown sence & sensible phone. It was Darcy – what a dick I yoghurt. It sed "Liz im sorry I didnt mean it take me back" but I was like "yeah rite im not stupid you second-rate delinquent!".
But then Emily brontosaur...PRESSED SEND
"OMFG why you do that?" I said and charlotte started crying. Darcy's jaguar (the lisence plac said POSH) suddenly pulled up outside, upperclassly. He had a gun!11
HE STORMED INTO THE BIG HOUSE AND nocked down the door- "ok hu sent da messaje!" he said quietly loudly.
"I did but I love Lyz" sed Emily bronte and then darcy SHOT HER and she died BLOOD CAME FROM HER everywhere and we all started crying. Even darcy did, and he looked really psoh and I wasn't angry with him any more. I hugged poshly him and he wouldn't let go.
He took off my corset thingy and I took off hi sclotehs and we started SCREWING each other, poshly! He placed his gentlemanly-thing into my lady's questionable and we did it for the first tym (were divorced so its ok)
tehn I rememberd dat lydia charlotte and emily were in the room
"EW YOU PERVS what r u DOIN? Go away" I shouted middleclassly1! (to scare them) I was so poshed off (get it?) htat they were watching us!
"we're sorry but you never said goodby"
"GET THE HECK OUT OF MY HOUSE" and then they went away.
Darcy and I went upstairs and started paris kissing (get it cos paris is posh) but then
"WHAT IS GOING ON HERE YOU BODACIOUS CHUMPS!1111"
It was...Collin!