"It's good to see you took my words to heart, Gabriel, about punishment, about being alone."

"Yeah well, there's no good way to fix broken wings when you can't move."

"Oh, come on, it isn't that bad."

"I don't count having to be bathed by the Winchesters ad a particularly good time."

"Hm… sounds funny, did someone get video."

"No, but I could make you a video of how you should go screw yourself."

Lucifer smiled, slipping his arm around his brother's shoulders. "Glad you still have your humor."

"Easier too when everything doesn't hurt."

"You did fine before."

"Before or after you cut me up like a roast?"

"Well before, but there's nothing to be ashamed about. I've had that pain Gabriel. You don't know what it was like Gabriel. Nothing, nothing hurts as much as being cast away from father. You think my vengeance isn't justified? Think of what you experienced and multiply it by a million and then continue it for eternity and then maybe you'll understand why. I'm not even being unreasonable. If it were you, you'd probably want to turn everything into something it's not supposed to be-"

"Luci, not that I don't love your monologues, but shut up."

Lucifer smiled again and rested his head on Gabriel's shoulder. Gabriel crossed his arms over his chest. He could feel something like a floor and wall, because his back was supported by something solid and there was a something he was sitting on enough to extend his legs, which he'd crossed at the ankle. Lucifer had one knee pulled up to chest.

"I was so scared, little brother. I thought I'd have to kill you, you know."

"Yeah, and I was afraid of that too."

"No, I mean it. I don't even want to kill Michael."

"Bullshit, Luci."

"Okay, so maybe I want to a little. But I'd rather not have to kill my brother."

"Only if Michael would apologize and you could punish him too."

"No one can understand pain until they've experienced it. Gabriel, don't' tell me that you're angry with me."

"You've made me an invalid."

"You'll heal."

"I'm useless, Lucifer."

"And now you know how I felt. I was locked away, what could I do? I just had to wait and watch, which is what you will do now."

"I'm never going to be on your side, Luci."

"I know, you've told me. You like the mud monkeys, not that I understand why."

"Lucifer-"

"Which is why I will keep some around, a few, for you. Mostly it'll be the earth and it's wonders, but I'll keep a small amount around. Enough for genetic diversity, but never too many. And they'll know who their masters are and where they stand. And that pagan woman, I'll keep her around for you, because I saw what you were willing to do to protect her."

"It wasn't just her."

"Yes I know, but it's why the humans. Maybe I'll keep a few angels around too. Do you know any good ones to recruit."

"No one's going to your side, Lucifer. We all know how that ends."

"Well, of course, I mean after I've won. What about our baby brother who keeps tagging along with the Winchester, Castiel."

"He's never going to listen to you."

"I don't know about that, Gabriel. He's just like you, you know. He's defied heaven, he's been cast out."

"He doesn't follow you."

"It won't matter after I win. He'll have to be punished too… not as severely as you had to be, because you really could have done something and he really couldn't have. But I'll accept him."

Gabriel sighed and slipped his arm around Lucifer.

"Big brother, I love, but you are an idiot."

"I beat you."

"Eh, you're just older, you're not smarter."

"You're fairly stupid too. Did you really think I wouldn't know your tricks?"

"Eh, had to try."

"See, stupid."

Gabriel had to smile a little at Lucifer's sulky tone. If only it could be this easy outside of a dream.

"You really think that getting what you want will make you happy."

"That's generally how it works."

"Now you know that isn't true. You know the song. You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you just might find you get what you need. So you blow up the world to your satisfaction and Michael's dead and so are most of the angels, but you around up a few, and me and baby brother Castiel, who you'll put on a pedestal, because we rebelled and ran away and you like the screwy ones. And you give us some toys to play with. You're trying to make your own family. One you control because that way they can't pull a Michael on you."

"No one will ever be able to do that again. I'm always aware."

"Yeah, constant vigilance and all that jazz. This isn't going to work out for you, Luci."

"Well, for your sake you should hope it does."

"What does that mean."

"You can get to your grace without me."

"All I need is the jar, and hell, I can find that. Not what I meant. You might have zoned out when I stitched you up. I put your remaining grace back where you kept it, and then I stitched that up too. No one can cut those strings but me. If I'm gone you'll exist forever without your grace. Even if you find it you won't be able to get it back in."

"Why would you-"

"Insurance little brother, just some insurance. Now, I was feeling generous. I fed you a tiny bit of Grace just now to speed up the healing process. You should be able to ingest food now."

"Oh how gracious of you."

"And now I send you on your way. I, after all, have an apocalypse to run."

"Gabriel?"

"What?" Gabriel's voice was groggy

"Sorry to wake you, but Dean and I decided you need to try eat," Sam said.

"Nice to see the two of you finally found two brain cells to run together," Gabriel muttered, pushing himself up.

He'd woken up a few times during his current five day stay at Che-Singer. So far he'd slept under a mountain of blankets (and scarves and hats and towels and coats and ponchos and socks and eventually newspapers, just anything to make him stop shivering, though he never stopped) and been unable to keep down even a little bit of food, or literally anything but water. He was still so weak that he couldn't hold himself up to do anything. At least his throat had healed enough for him to speak again.

"Easy," Sam said, sitting down next to Gabriel.

He slipped his arm around Gabriel's middle and Gabriel leaned on Sam. There was no other way to do this. Sam moved the little breakfast in bed tray over to stand over Gabriel's lap. Gabriel had to admit he was impressed at Sam's ability to not spill food while arranging the legs all with one arm. Gabriel didn't even think to help until it was over. He'd probably have made a mess of it.

"A bendy straw, really?" he asked.

Sam picked up the cup, holding it up for Gabriel to sip. It was just water, but Gabriel was happy for it. If Lucifer's little dream communication was correct, then Gabriel should be able to keep this stuff down anyway.

"Open up," Sam said, offering Gabriel a spoon full of oat-mush.

Gabriel did in fact open up, but the second he closed his mouth over the spoon he wished he hadn't. Sam must have realized this because he offered Gabriel water, which Gabriel sipped quickly to try and get the taste down.

"Are you trying to make me be sick?"

"You kept it down." Same sounded amazed.

"What the hell was that?"

"Um… apple cinnamon instant with a lot of peanut butter. It can't be that bad."

"It is that bad, what the hell were you yahoos thinking making that unholy concoction?"

"That you needed protein," Sam said. "Come on, it isn't so bad. I've had it before."

"When?"

"When I was a kid and Dean was trying to get me better."

"And what happened then?"

"I threw up- but that isn't the point. I had a stomach virus."

"Are you sure it wasn't just spontaneous expulsion?"

"No, Gabriel, come on, just try and get a few bites down. It'll help you get better."

"There's no better, Sasquatch, not without my grace."

"Well, there should be better than this. Castiel was okay without his grace."

"It's not the same thing."

"Why not?"

"Give me the mush," Gabriel said.

Sam looked torn. Finally he offered another spoonful. Gabriel accepted it. He gagged and needed water just about instantly, but he got it down. In fact he got five more spoonfuls after that down before he felt like he just couldn't take anymore.

"I'm done," Gabriel said when he finished the last of the water. "No more of this."

"Okay."

Sam moved the tray by himself and helped Gabriel lay back on his stomach. Gabriel's other wounds were starting to heal, but his wings had barely healed at all. Sam tucked the warm things about around Gabriel. They didn't have a way to put a shirt on him and he shivered non-stop no matter what they did. Gabriel only felt comfortable when he was asleep. Gabriel knew Sam would be back in under a minute, but they both knew Gabriel couldn't be without as much warmth as they could provide, even for that short time. He didn't even have a fever, he was just cold all over.

Sam did return in a moment. He helped Gabriel get out from under the covers and helped him up. Gabriel had been stuck in different pairs of Dean's underwear (which was something he did not appreciate) until they could go buy him extra pairs, which Gabriel had thought took way too long. Still he was still in just underwear. Everyone was too tall for him and considering that he still needed someone to hold him out so he could go to the toilet (something he was horrified to learn he had to do now) it was really just too complicated to worried about pants. Shirts weren't even an option because of his wings.

Having to piss was a hellish experience. Getting to the bathroom down the hall was a hellish experience, and it was one in a long line of things he had to do before he could get back into bed. Crab walking down the hall while being supported by Sam Winchester more than himself was no fun. Gabriel wasn't having that carried thing anymore if he could help it. Sure he was basically being held up by Sam and practically standing on the younger Winchester's feet in order to be moved at all, and yeah it was basically carrying and completely exhausting, but at least Gabriel wasn't being carried around like a baby anymore.

The bathroom was a place from Hell, Gabriel was sure. No amount of bathmats could convince Gabriel otherwise. He started shivering at least double, if not triple fold once he stepped inside. Without his grace the porcelain room felt like he'd been asked to walk in the Arctic in his underwear.

Then came the deed itself, the less to be said about that the better. Either way he had to have someone where, which wasn't comfortable for either occupant. And Sam insisted on everyone washing their hands. Gabriel couldn't decide if washing with cold was worse, or waiting longer in the hell room for the water to warm up was worse.

What Gabriel knew most of all was that before the experience was over he'd practically wish to stay in the bathroom just to not have to move anymore. Sam would dutifully remind him that it would easier for everyone if Gabriel just let himself be carried. Gabriel wouldn't do that. So he'd just was to trudge back to bed and let Sam wrap him up like a kitten in stupid sweaters. Under all those layers and Gabriel still couldn't get warm, but at least the cold wasn't so bad that he wanted to burst into tears.

Settled back under his layers Gabriel wondered if this was how Lucifer felt when he'd been cast out of heaven. Was the cage this cold? Or was it like the bathroom, where there weren't even layers to hide under. Gabriel was sure that he was warming up (or he was hoping that he would eventually) but had Lucifer warmed up? Or did it take until he was free and in a vessel before he could feel warm again?

Lucifer wanted him to think like that. Gabriel hated it. Thinking about being so cold made Gabriel think about what Lucifer was offering. Would it really be so bad? If Gabriel could get Sam to say yes, then they could probably save Dean and Bobby, and probably a few hunter friends that both had. Hell, they might even be able to get Sam and Dean's parents, that girl Sam had, all those people they cared about back, and a few others, just some people. And Castiel, and a couple of others. And Gabriel would have Kali and they could be happy. He thought they could be content anyway.

And he knew just how dangerous those thoughts were. The more he thought about them, the more he wanted them and the less he wanted to keep helping. He wasn't even sure he could help, especially if his grace was something only Lucifer could give him back. Gabriel wasn't even sure he could use his grace if it wasn't all together. He'd never even heard of someone carving up grace like Lucifer had done to him. He wouldn't put it past Lucifer to have just tried it for the first time.

If he hadn't then Gabriel pitied the ones who'd gone before.

"Gabe?"

"Dean."

"We got a lead on Pestilence."

"Oh good, we can pop right out and nab him."

"There's been a virus outbreak. Me and Sam are going to check them out."

"Good plan. Not be de a dick, but where does that leave me?"

"Well, you're keeping food down now."

"If you can call it food."

"And Sam said that you're not leaning on him so much for support, so we got a friend of Bobby's to come check on you."

"Friend how?"

"Sheriff!"

"Is this the boy you wanted me to meet, Dean?"

"Sheriff Mills, Gabriel the Archangel. Gabriel, Sheriff Jody Mills."

There was a moment of silence.

"Seriously Winchester? You know the amount of time I avoided the law only for you to bring ti up here to babysit me?"

"Dean, are you really asking me to babysit an archangel?"

"Well, we have to go hunt one of the four horsemen to try and stop the apocalypse. Sheriff, I wouldn't ask if it wasn't important."

"An angel, Dean, an Archangel."

"He's harmless."

Gabriel offered an impressive death glare.

"We owe him, Jody."

"And you're running off and leaving me."

"Yeah, well, some yahoo in a porn video gave us a job to do."

Gabriel snorted. Jody looked confused and more than a little troubled.

"So, hopefully we'll be back in a few days. You two play nice."

Dean left. Gabriel propped himself up on one of his many pillows and indicated the chair before shrinking even further under his covers. Jody walked to the padded chair and sat down, crossing a leg at the knee and her arms over her chest. She looked very closely at Gabriel's large golden wings.

"So, an archangel?"

"Yep."

"Never seen anyone with wings before."

"They're normally very well hidden."

"Oh… what happened?"

"My big brother and I got in a fight, he won and he takes winning very seriously."

"Lucifer?"

"Yup."

"I heard from the boys that… well, the apocalypse was started, but you know… even with… what happened here, it's hard to accept."

"What happened here?"

"People uh… coming back from the dead."

"Cool, anyone you know?"

"I'd rather not talk about it."

"Too close to home?"

"It was my son."

"Ah, well, very close to home then."

Gabriel shifted his wings a ducked his head, biting his arm to try and keep silent from the pain.

"You know, a lot of people, just about everyone in the town had or knew someone who came back. And we have a very good veterinarian."

"Do I look like I have cats I need to be tending to?"

" Well, you look like a man who can't go to a hospital because you have an extra appendage problem, and you also look like you could use a professional who knows how to deal with those kinds of things."

"No such things as an Angel Doctor."

"What you don't have wing problems in heaven?"

"We normally heal ourselves."

"Dean said you'd been holed up here for a few days, why aren't you healed."

"Let's just assume that for any question about my health you may have, Lucifer is the answer."

Jody uncrossed her arms, he eyes fixed on Gabriel's wings.

"Do they hurt?"

"Only when I move them or they touch anything or anything touches them."

"Sounds sensitive, what happened, and don't say Lucifer."

"Well, he did."

"You know what I mean."

"Broken."

"Badly?"

"I don't care what my brother says, I don't think they're going to heal back."

"Then I'll call Dr. Smith."

"What happened to not being able to get a doctor?"

"He's a Veterinarian."

"And I look like a dog to you?"

"He's dealt with hundreds of birds in his practice and he's probably as close as it's going to get to someone who can actually help you. Wouldn't you like to get a second opinion about whether they'll heal or not?"

Gabriel studied Jody. She wasn't exactly his type. He went after young and insanely attractive. Jody was older, not unattractive, and she reminded him a bit of Kali. There wasn't a real wish to kill, but there was that very serious stubborn 'I'm right, you're wrong, the sooner you figure that out the better' attitude. She'd probably call the vet anyway.

"Okay, fine, but I better get a lollipop for this."

Jody laughed.

"You think I'm kidding."

"Lollipops are what kids get at the Pediatricians."

"They're also what archangels get when they happen to have a sugar addiction."

Jody smiled and stood up. "Okay, tell you what. I'll call Dr. Smith and go pick him up, and I'll pick up from lollipops up on my way home. Sound like a deal?"

"Sounds like a deal I can get behind."

Gabriel buried himself deeper into his covers. A couple of the layers had slipped and he could really feel it and he couldn't really move to fix it. It surprised him when he suddenly felt warmth instead of just biting cold in those places. He turned his head, seeing Jody rearranging his covers for him. He turned away and closed his eyes, pretending to be asleep. It was such a mom-thing to do. He thought again about Dean helping him drink water when he'd first been found.

These people were why the apocalypse was important. If Gabriel did support Lucifer, he could save them, their small bit of kindness and caring that they offered freely. Or Gabriel was in so much pain because of those small acts of kindness. Yes, people were broken, but they tried to be better. That was why this was important. What would happen to the people?

A/N: Who says I never do anything for you? Eh mostly the speed of updates is for me because I want this to be done quickly so I can get it done, and it's like… only in the 4 episodes of the end of season 5, because if I start thinking about alive!Gabriel through the rest of it, I'm going to have so many fucking problems, because yeah.

Also, the cold!Gabriel is based on old Medieval art where Satan is depicted as being blue. The idea is that Satan is the farthest from God, who is light and warmth, and therefore Satan is always freezing. It's why Dante put Satan frozen in ice in the 34th Canto.