Lawndale 2021
SDCU-0001-AAAA
Episode 017 [2-03]: Murder, They Sang Part Two
Daria and Beavis and Butthead are property of Glenn Eichler, Mike Judge, and MTV.
Sealab 2021 is property of Williams Street Productions, LLC.
Metalocalypse is property of Brendon Small and Williams Street Productions, LLC.
Opening Theme [Heavy Metal Variation]:
Excuse Me, Excuse Me…
I guess I'll have to be direct!
If you're gonna' stand!
On my neck!
[Chant of neck]
Then you'd better check!
[Chant of check]
Under the sea!
[Chant of sea]
Cause that is where you'll find me!
[Bitchin' guitar solo begins]
[Bitchin' guitar solo plays]
[Bitchin' guitar solo ends]
Underneath the Sealab!
Underneath the water!
Sealab, Sealab!
Sealab, Sealab!
Sealab, Sealab!
Sealaaab!
At the bottom of the Seeeaaa!
Date: Thursday, November 19th, 2021
"So, I thinks that wents pretty well," Toki said after the curtains closed in front of the band. "Yeah... that was actually kind of fun," Nathan said. "Did anyones gets any ideas for new songs from this?" Skwisgaar asked. "Uh... actually, no. I didn't," Nathan said.
"Yeah, neither did I," Pickles admitted. "Trues, but mans did those other guys sucks!" Toki exclaimed after checking to make sure that Mystic Spiral was nowhere to be seen backstage. "I know," Nathan said as he started packing up his gear. The band had used their backup pit-stop gear for the performance instead of their regular concert gear.
"You put it on a shelf? What kind of lyrics are those? And there's, like, only one or two verses... and they're pretty damn short," Pickles said. "I swears, if I ever hears Ice Box Womans again, I will kill somebodys," Skwisgaar said. "You know, I think I know what songs we should play on Saturday," Nathan said.
"Yeah?" Murderface asked him. "Thunderhorse, Bloodtrocuted, Hatredcopter, Go Forth and Die, Better Metal Snake, Face Fisted, and, uh... Murmaider. "We played almost half of those tonight," Pickles said. "Yeah, but they still rock," Nathan said. "Hmm, that's true," Toki said. Wait, what about that song you sang when we releasd those kitties on that island?" Pickles asked him.
"What? I didn't sing anything when they were released," Nathan said. "Sure, you sang 'Release the Kitties!'" Pickles said. "Dude, I was giving orders to the guys opening the box," Nathan said. "Oh," Pickles said in embarrassment. "Hey, do you thinks our son is doings okay on that island?" Toki asked. "Eh, I'm sure he's doing fine," Pickles said.
"Hey, why don'ts we plays that Awaken song again?" Toki asked. "Uh... maybe not," Nathan said. "Oh come ons! We're underwaters! The sound won't be heard anywhere but inside of Sealab," Toki argued. "Yeah, but... the first time we played it, that troll thing woke up. The next time we played it... I think something happened in Japan with a volcano. I'm not sure about the details," Nathan said. "I think the Japanese volcano was just a coincidence," Pickles said.
Line Break
"Go forth, be conquered... Go forth and die!" Nathan Explosion's voice played out over Stacey Rowe's music player. "This song is so... true. It's actually kind of depressing, now that I think about it," Stacey said to herself as she listened to the music.
"Strangled by the IVY... Drown in student loans... Better off just dying." Stacey began doing an air guitar while the music played, not noticing Quinn entering her room. "Hi, Stacey!" Quinn called over the music. "Stacey!" Quinn called. She put her hand on Stacey's right shoulder. "Huh?" Stacey asked.
Quinn turned the volume down on the music player. "So, ready to go see Dethklok on Saturday?" Quinn asked her. "Hell yeah!" Stacey exclaimed.
Date: Friday, November 20th, 2021
Daria entered the bridge and sat down at her station. Jane was right behind her. "Afternoon, Daria," Sparks said. "Afternoon, Sparks," Daria replied. "So, I heard that you gave Dethklok the grand tour on Wednesday," Sparks said. "You heard? Must be difficult to hear when your constantly listening to communication channels," Daria snarked.
"Amy told me last night, just before... never mind," Sparks said. "Yeah, I know that you two are... seeing each other, but I really don't need any details," Daria said. "Daria... have you noticed anyone acting strangely around Sealab lately?" Sparks asked her.
"Why?" Daria asked him. "Anyone close to Commander Li? Anyone who could have gotten access to her housing unit?" Sparks asked. "Sparks, what did you steal from Commander Li?" Daria asked him. "Nothing. Someone murdered her and framed Ms. Morris yesterday," Sparaks replied nonchalantly.
Jane nearly dropped her art supplies. "Wait... someone murdered Commander Li?" she asked. "Yup. Strangled her and then plopped Samantha Morris on her bed as a decoy," Sparks said. "Well, who's looking into the case?" Daria asked. "Commander DeMartino is in charge of the investigation," Sparks replied.
"You know, there are plenty of people on Sealab who want Commander Li dead... it could be anyone," Jane said. "Not really. Only someone who was close enough to figure out Commander Li's access code for her housing unit, or had authorization to enter it based on rank," Sparks said.
"That would include you, Commander DeMartino, Captain Murphy, Captain Shanks, Commander Oats, and the late Commander Li herself," Daria said. "And Samantha Morris. She was really close to Commander Li, if you know what I mean," Sparks said. "And here I thought that Barch and O'Neill were the only ones," Jane said.
"Wait, why didn't Aunt Amy tell me last night after I came home?" Daria asked. "I don't know. Maybe she didn't want to worry you. Ask her," Sparks said.
"Sparks, how's the communication traffic today?" Daria asked him. "Almost non-existent," he replied. "Okay then. Jane, we're going to solve a mystery," Daria said as she stood up. "I'll tell them that you ate something that didn't agree with you and then had to use one of the large bathrooms down the hall," Sparks said.
"Thanks," Daria said before she and Jane left the bridge. "She can handle it," he said to himself as he returned to a rousing game of Chess against his computer. "You cheating whore!" he growled under his breath as the computer check-mated him yet again for the tenth game in a row.
Daria and Jane grabbed a transport cart and made their way to Commander DeMartino's office. "Daria, when did you get a license for the carts?" Jane asked her. "Two weeks ago," Daria replied. "Oh right! That was what we were celebrating that night, wasn't it?" Jane asked her. "You forgot?" Daria asked her as they slowly turned a corner.
"Well, most of what I remember involves you and Tom taking turns eating my-" "Look, we're almost there," Daria said as she saw a handful of people in the corridor. She slowed down the cart and then parallel parked it next to one side of the wall. Jane followed Daria as they got out of the cart and approached the doors to DeMartino's office.
Daria entered an access code and scanned her ID badge before the door opened for her and they entered the waiting area. "Can I help you, Lieutenant Morgendorffer?" Commander DeMartino's voice asked from a speaker. "May we enter your office?" Daria asked him. "You may do so," his voice said. The door slid open and Daria and Jane walked into Commander DeMartino's office.
"Commander, we'd like permission to join the investigation," Daria requested. "The investigation?" he asked her. "Of Commander Angela Li's murder," Daria clarified for him. "Who informed you?" DeMartino asked her. "Sparks," Daria replied. "Figures. Is there any way to convince you to pursue other interests at this time?" DeMartino asked her. "Well, asking for money won't work, since you aren't either of my parents," Daria said. "That is true," DeMartino said in agreement.
"So, what have you found so far?" Daria asked him. "Wait, I haven't agreed to let you in on the investigation," DeMartino countered. "You can either let me in or I'll investigate on my own. Which would you rather see?" Daria replied. "Fine," DeMartino said as he began sharing information with her.
Line Break
Stacey Rowe's eyes were bugging out in adoration as she listened with rapt attention to Toki Wartooth telling her about Fat Kid. "He was, likes, our little neutered angel after that," Toki said. "Yeah," added Nathan, "Then we sent him to live on that island with the kitties." "Yeah... they ripped him to shreds," Pickles said quietly with a smile.
Quinn and Stacey had been heading towards Tiffany Blum-Deckler's housing unit for a fashion club meeting when they encountered Dethklok in the halls of Pod 18. "Hey, remember that time when Murderface started trying out those different religions after his near-death experience?" Pickles mentioned.
"Oh yeah," Nathan said. "Hey, Skwisgaar, how much have you re-thought your life lately?" Nathan asked with a smirk. "Shut ups," Skwisgaar said. "So... what are you guys doing wandering the halls right now?" Quinn finally asked them. "Oh, just looking around, exploring. Getting some ideas for future songs and stuff," Nathan replied. She hadn't been able to ask them earlier, because as soon as Stacey recgonized Toki, she turned into a squealing fangirl, and Quinn was forced to spend all of her efforts on keeping Stacey properly restrained.
"C-C-C-Can I have your autograph?" Stacey asked Toki. "Sures! You gots somethings to writes with?" he replied. Stacey took off her backpack and pulled out her notebook, before handing Toki a pen. He signed his name on a blank sheet. "Hey, guys, do yous wants to give autograph to this girl too?" Toki asked the rest of Dethklok.
"Eh, why not?" Pickles said as he took the pen and wrote his name down. Nathan was next, followed by Murderface and finally Skwisgaar. "There you goes," Skwisgaar said as he handed the pen and notebook back to Stacey. "Whens was the last times we didn't gets molested while signings something?" Skiwsgaar asked himself.
Line Break
"So, we know that it isn't Commander DeMartino, or Lieutenant Sherman," Daria said as she looked over the list of suspects and the alibis they'd given. "We know that Captain Murphy wasn't responsible, nor was Captain Shanks. And Commander Oats was with Marco that night at Pizza-Marine. That would leave... Commander Sparks," Daria said. "You don't that he... you know, did it, do you?" Jane asked her. "He was the one who told us about the murder. It would have been the perfect way of deflecting attention away from himself," Daria said out loud.
"Li was killed Wednesday night, so we have to find out what Sparks was doing on Wednesday night," Jane said she and Daria made their way to the bridge. "We don't know for certain that he was responsible, though," Jane added. "As Sherlock Holmes once said in The Adventure of the Beryl Coronet, when you have excluded the impossible, whatever remains, however impossible, must be the truth," Daria said.
The two girls eventually reached the bridge and entered. "Sparks," Daria said as they moved closer to him. "Yeah?" he asked her while keeping his eyes on his computer screen, playing a game of Solitaire.
"Um... where exactly were you on Wednesday night?" Daria asked him. "I thought you didn't want to hear about what Amy and I do together," he said. "You were... with Aunt Amy that night?" Daria asked him. "Yeah. You can ask her yourself when you find her. Why do you... oh, right, that's the night that Commander Li was murdered," Sparks replied.
"So... your alibi is that you were... spending time with Amy Barksdale," Daria said. "If by spending time you mean having sex, then yes," Sparks replied with a smirk. "Thanks. We'll, go find Amy and ask her for confirmation," Daria said as she and Jane left the bridge. Sparks turned back to his game of Solitaire.
"So... do you think he was lying?" Jane asked Daria. "No. He wasn't lying. He and Aunt Amy have been seeing each other for two or three months now. They're adults, and that's what adults tend to do when they... date," Daria said. "They're dating?" Jane asked. "Well, it's more of a friends with benefits kind of thing, according to Aunt Amy. Sparks hasn't said anything to challenge that statement, so I guess that's how it is," Daria replied.
"Hold on... why do I get the feeling that we've already talked about Amy seeing Sparks before?*" Daria asked. "I don't know. But there is a strange feeling of familiarity about this discussion," Jane said. "Anyway, let's go find Aunt Amy," Daria said.
Line Break
"Yes, Daria, I was having sex with Jodene that night," Amy said with a sigh. "Thank you for confirming this," Daria replied. "Why did you want to know?" Amy asked her. "So that we can rule him out on the list of suspects in Commander Li's murder," Daria replied.
"Daria, you really shouldn't get involved in this," Amy said. "Too late, and Commander DeMartino already gave me permission," Daria replied. "Dammit," Amy muttered.
"So... who else is there?" Jane asked as they ruled out both Commander Sparks and Amy Barksdale. "It would still have to be someone close to Commander Li. Or maybe... someone close to Ms. Morris. Since the investigation revealed that Morris and Li were seeing each other, Morris would have been given access to Li's housing unit, and that means that someone close to her could have gotten access," Daria said.
"But who could that be?" Jane asked. "We'll have to talk to the teachers at New Lawndale High. Come on, Jane," Daria said. "Wait, I'm coming with you," Amy said as she followed her niece and Jane.
Line Break
"Nope," Janet Barch said. "I don't talk with Samantha very much. Not after she tried to stab me in the back by threatening to expose me and Skinny here when she herself was involved with Angela," she continued. "So, you haven't been close enough to her to be invited over to her domicile, I take it?" Daria asked her. "I believe I just said that," Barch replied.
"And you were with Timothy O'Neill that night, correct?" Daria asked. "What did you-" "It's not that much of a secret," Jane interrupted her.
Line Break
"No. Samantha isn't my type," Timothy O'Neill said. "I mean, yes she is physically attractive, but... well..." "We know that you and Miss Barch are seeing each other," Daria said. "Oh! I guess we haven't done a good job of keeping that a secret, have we?" he asked in response. "Well... most people are too oblivious to notice, but the signs are there," Daria replied.
"So, anyway, you were never invited to her quarters and never did anything with her?" Daria asked him. "That's correct. She and Janet had a bit of a spat some time ago, and I've tried to avoid being around her so that she won't try to do anything to me in an attempt to hurt Janet, as a precaution," O'Neill said. "Samantha Morris, well, can be very vindictive, much like Commander Li," O'Neill explained.
Line Break
"Why are you interviewing me?" Commander Anthony DeMartino asked. "We're being thorough," Daria replied. "You already have my statement in the document packet I gave you, along with the interrogation of Samantha Morris as well," he said. "Oh yeah," Jane said. "Now get out of my office. Mister Offdensen has requested a meeting with me in an hour, and I haven't eaten anything since lunch," DeMartino said.
"And you, Lieutenant Barksdale, I need you to take a maintenance to the stadium again. Someone found some loose screws near one of the stage lights. I don't want any accidents occurring tomorrow."
Line Break
"Oh, I was with Claire Defoe that night, talking to her about an art project she has planned for her class next week," David Van Driessen said. "Hmm, since now's as good a time as any, what happened on Thursday?" Daria asked him. "Oh that? Well, I'm ashamed to admit it, but I had flashbacks to my time in Highland when I heard Kevin Thompson's chuckling and his comments. It reminded me so much of Beavis and Butthead," he admitted sadly.
"Their laughter sometimes haunts me in my sleep," he said. "Sometimes, when I'm around Dolphin Boy, I have flashbacks than can last up to ten minutes, thanks to his incessant chirping sounding so much like Beavis's laughter," Van Driessen said with a frown. Daria frowned as well. David Van Driessen was one of the few adults who she would ever admit to looking up to, and to see him like this was... depressing.
Line Break
"I was with David that night. We were talking about a special art project I have planned next week. Jane, I think you'll really enjoy it," Claire Defoe said. "Um... sure," Jane replied. "So, what else were you doing with Mr. Van Driessen that night?" Daria asked her. "Him. I mean, we had a very eventful night together," Defoe said with a blush.
"And, what about your relationship with Miss Morris? Has she ever invited you to her quarters?" Daria asked her. "Once or twice. The first time I actually went along, not realizing that Angela Li was there as well. I thought that they were going to inform me that my class was going to have budget issues again, but instead they... wanted to discuss something else," Defoe said.
"They propositioned you?" Daria asked. "Well... yes. I don't swing that way, although I do admit that Samantha is attractive, but I just don't see her in a romantic light," Defoe replied. "I turned down the second offer a few weeks ago," Defoe said. "And I've never been close to Angela."
Line Break
"Oh, I've spent a few nights at Li's quarters or Samantha's quarters while going over budget plans," Diane Bennett said. "There have been a few times when she's actually had me meet her in her office in the security area, which I've always found strange." "I see, and on Wednesday night?" Daria asked her. "I was busy going over budget costs for tomorrow's concert," she replied.
Line Break
"No, I've never really been close to either of them," Calvin Deckard said. "Both of them just kind of rubbed me the wrong way, in terms of personality. Miss Li always had this paranoid tyrant personality that just creeped me out, and Samantha... I don't know. She always struck me as someone who doesn't care for what's right as long as she gets what she wants."
"Thank you, Mr. Deckard," Daria said. "And that night?" "I was busy going over papers and grading homework. I remember passing by Miss Bennett on my way to my quarters, though. I said hello to her, but she didn't respond."
Line Break
"Eh, I've tried makin' friends with Sam, but she always blew me off," Coach Gibson said with a sigh. "I see, and you were never very close to Commander Li?" Daria asked. "Not really. I did my job, did whatever she told or asked me to do, and that was that," he replied nonchalantly.
Line Break
"I've considered Commander Li to be an academic equal, sometimes, although her paranoid security measures have always given me a slight sense of unease. Every now and then I find myself checking the bathrooms for hidden cameras," Alfred Phelps said. "And you've never been close to Samantha Morris either?" Daria asked him carefully. "No. I will admit that from a purely objective viewpoint, her body is attractive, but she isn't my type," he replied.
"No?" "No. I can admit to the beauty of the female form, but my tastes are... elsewhere," he said. "You like other dudes," Jane said plainly. "...Yes." Phelps said. "Hmm, this means I win that bet with Andrea," Jane said.
"So, even though you've made it clear that you've never been close to either of them in that way, where were you on Wednesday night?" Daria asked him. "I was grading papers. I have to say, Miss Morgendorffer-" "Lieutenant Morgendorffer," Daria corrected him. "Lieutenant Morgendorffer, that your sister is showing a marked improvement in the time since the move from Lawndale," Phelps said.
"I'll be sure to pass that on to her tonight," Daria said. "Please do, and be sure to tell her that the Advanced Math Club is always looking for new members," Phelps said. "I'll try to remember," Daria said as she and Jane left Alfred Phelps' housing unit.
Line Break
"Never spent much time with either of them outside of work hours," Thomas Hanson said. "And that night?" "I was grading papers and homework. I think I fell asleep at my desk, though. At my housing unit, of course. I keep a work desk there."
Line Break
"I've always tried to stay as far away from Commander Li as possible," Megan Fitzgerald said. "And on Wednesday night?" "I was grading papers and mast-I mean, relieving some stress."
Line Break
"None of these leads go anywhere," Daria said. "Wait... Miss Bennett said that she'd been at both of their quarters before and that she'd been in both of Commander Li's offices. She's the most likely culprit," Jane said. "You're right," Daria said.
"We need to find Commander DeMartino right away," Daria said as she and Jane made their way over to a set of transport carts. "Let's go," Daria said as they sped off towards Pod 08.
Line Break
"See, these guitars are mades from the metals of the sunken wreckage of the Titanic," Skwisgaar said. "Coooool," Stacey said in awe as Skwisgaar showed off his guitar collection. "Hey, I gots a rebuilt grandpa's guitar from that time we wokes up that troll," Toki said. "Did you bring it with you?" Pickles asked him. "No," Toki said sadly. "I lefts it at home," he added.
"I have this guitar made from wood found in a Siberian forest. I once swung it this car that some douchebag had parked between a regular parking space and a handi-capped space, and it totally wrecked up the car!" Nathan bragged. "Cool! Can I see it?" Stacey asked him. "I, uh... I left it at Mordhaus, didn't I?" he said.
"Aw, don't feel bad, Nathan," Toki said. "I lefts my specials guitars at home too," he added in an attempt to cheer up Nathan. "I only brought my regular guitar and two spares as backup," Murderface said. "I wanted to leave room in the Death-X for souvenirs," he said.
"Did you bring any cool guitars, Pickles?" Stacey asked him. "I'm the drummer. I only play guitar as backup in case Toki forgets his insulin before a show that doesn't need drums for some reason. I mean, yeah, I brought one just in case, but it's just a standard guitar. Cause, I mean, you know, it's a backup guitar that I probably won't even use," he said with a shrug.
"So, what songs are you guys gonna play at the concert tomorrow?" Stacey asked them giddily. "Well," Nathan began, "I'm pretty sure we're gonna play Thunderhorse. People like that one. We'll also play Go Forth and Die, uh, Bloodtrocuted, Murmaider, Hatredcopter, Face Fisted, and Better Metal Snake. We're also thinking about maybe playing Awaken, but given our history with that song, we might leave it out."
There was a knock on the door. "I'll get it," Quinn said. She opened the door and saw Elsie Sloane standing in the doorway, along with a goth girl she'd seen at school. "Elsie, um..." "Andrea," Andrea LaGotha replied. "Right. You're in my sister's grade, aren't you?" Quinn asked her.
"Pretty sure," Andrea replied. She looked over and saw Stacey standing next to Dethklok and her eyes widened. "Wait... one of the Fashion geeks is a fan of Dethklok?" Andrea asked out loud. "Oh great, more fans trying to get pre-show autographs," Pickles said.
"Well, you aren't wrong about that," Andrea said with a smirk. "So, who's the other one, and what is that thing on her face?" Pickles asked. "Yeah, whats is that?" Toki asked curiously. "It is my voice modulator," Elsie replied.
"What do you needs it for?" Toki asked her. "My voice is dangerous to the ears of mere mortals, and only a small number can listen without succumbing to the insanity unleashed by it," Elsie said. "Um, what?" Murderface asked. "My voice is a dangerous weapon, capable of making grown men collapse on their knees as the blood spills from their eyes and their voices cry for a salvation that will never come," Elsie explained.
"Whoa! Those words were brutal. Those would make great lyrics for a song," Nathan said in awe. "What did you say your name was?" Nathan asked her. "Elsie Sloane," she replied. "Can we hears your real voice?" Skwisgaar asked her. "No. Mere mortals such as yourselves would not be able to handle it," Elsie replied.
"Ha! Please, I am no mere mortal," Skwisgaar said. "I am a rock star!" "You are not making my point any less valid," Elsie commented.
Line Break
"Are you sure?" Commander DeMartino asked Daria. "She's the only one who could possibly have access to Commander Li and Miss Morris's quarters and not raise suspicion from either of them with her presence," Daria explained. "What about security footage of the hallway? How did she not get caught earlier?" Offdensen asked. Daria and Jane had interrupted his meeting with DeMartino.
"Whoever was watching the cameras must have been in on it. But who was in charge of the cameras for that section of the pod that night?" Daria asked. "Wait, Tommy Sherman was on duty that night. He might know something," DeMartino said. "I thought Sherman was with you when you found the body of Commander Li," Daria noted.
"He was, but since he always followed Commander Li's orders, and Miss Bennett was close to her, he may have willingly given her the access code if she were to have asked him, since he also had an access code for her quarters," DeMartino said. "So we have to find Sherman and ask him for confirmation," Daria said.
Line Break
"Um... ouch," Jane said as she looked at Tommy Sherman's corpse. "Do you think she killed him because he discovered the truth? I mean, he was never the brightest bulb in the socket, but wasn't a complete idiot either," Jane asked. "It's possible that she wanted to make sure that he couldn't talk. Dead men tell no tales," Daria said.
"But... why? Why would she kill Commander Li and Lieutenant Sherman?" Commander DeMartino asked rhetorically. "Wait... Bennett is in charge of the budget for both New Lawndale and Sealab, correct?" Daria asked. "Yeah, she is!" DeMartino said.
"What if Commander Li's deal with Dethklok made her suffer a breakdown because of the cost? Or what if she found out that we were being paid in pennies for hosting the concert?" Jane asked. "Pennies?" Offdensen asked her. "Yeah, she hates pennies for some reason," Jane replied.
"We have to find her. Quickly," DeMartino said firmly. "I need to get to the band. Keep them safe!" Offdensen said as he ran off.
Line Break
"Eliminate them, before the rest of Sealab's crew can catch you!" General Grozer said to Diane Bennett over a special communications device. "Affirmative," Bennett replied emotionlessly. "Once you succeed, make your way to a transportation vessel and hide. We'll pick you up at the designated rendezvous point tomorrow after you reach the surface and make your way back to the mainland. Good luck, Agent Shadow," Grozer said.
Line Break
"Thanks you guys!" Stacey row called out as she, Quinn, Andrea, and Elsie left Dethklok's suite. As they made their way over to an elevator, they saw Diane Bennett slowly walking towards them. "Hey, Miss Bennett, what are you doing here?" Quinn asked her.
"Oh, I'm just... checking on the band to make sure that our money was well spent on their accommodations!" Bennett said. "Oh, okay," Quinn said. "She is lying. I can sense it," Elsie said. "Why, what ever do you mean?" Bennett asked Elsie as she drew a gun from behind her back.
"Hey, you guys left this notebook behind!" Pickles said as he opened the door to the suite. Bennett took out her gun and opened fire. "Holy shit!" Pickles exclaimed as he closed the door. Bennett ran over and grabbed Elsie, putting the gun to her head.
"Come on out now and I'll let the girl live!" Bennett called. "Do you truly wish to die so soon?" Elsie asked her. "Shut up! I have my orders!" Bennett snapped at her. "Very well. Quinn, Stacey, Andrea! Cover your ears or get into Dethklok's suite!" Elsie yelled.
"Wait, why would we-" "Come on!" Quinn shouted as she grabbed Andrea and Stacey by their arms and opened the suite entrance, rushing inside. Bennett ran forward and leaped inside as well, rolling onto the floor with Elsie still in her grasp. Part of Elsie's voice modulator came loose. Quinn grabbed Andrea and Stacey and this time ran out of the room, closing the door behind them.
"Dethklok, if you truly wish to see brutality in its purest form, at least cover your ears," Elsie said, keeping her face pressed into the modulator as Bennett stood up and let her go. She aimed her gun at Toki first. "Good bye, Dethklok!" Bennett shouted as she placed a finger on the trigger.
Elsie had taken her modulator off by now, and tapped Bennett's shoulder. "Don't worry, I'll deal with you eventually," Bennett said, before she noticed that Elsie's voice modulator wasn't on her face.
"Foolish mortal! You have played with fire for far too long, and now your actions must bear their decrepit fruit! Behold, the torment of a thousand agonies, suffered by a thousand victims!" Elsie shouted.
Bennett's eyes rolled back and blood began to leak from her nose and ears. "I-I don't... I... W-W-Whhyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!?" Bennett screamed in agony as she fell over onto the floor. Elsie walked over and grabbed her modulator, carefully placing it back on her face. She looked over at Dethklok, who were all staring at her and Bennetts body.
"That... was fucking metal," Nathan said. "Brutal," Murderface said in awe. "The most metals things I have ever seen!" Toki whispered. "Dude, you just, like, killed her with your voice!" Pickles exclaimed. "Yo, thats was pretty brutal, what yous dids right there," Skwisgaar said as he pointed at Bennett's body.
"So, it would seem that you are not mere mortals after all," Elsie said, before the door opened and Quinn ran inside. "Elsie, what-oh," Quinn said as she looked at Diane Bennett's body.
Date: Saturday, November 21st, 2021
"So, Elsie Sloane ended up putting Diane Bennett in a coma," Commander DeMartino said as he watched Dethklok getting set up on the stadium stage. "Yep. It seems that Miss Sloane's voice was not something that we were given any warning about by Commander Li," Offdensen said with a frown. "Miss Sloane attends New Fielding, and Commander Li did not serve in any capacity there. She only served as a part-time principal at New Lawndale," DeMartino said.
"Hmm, is there anything else we should know about Miss Sloane?" Offdensen asked warily. "Nothing that I am aware of," DeMartino said.
Line Break
Dethklok looked around at the stage full of people. "Hey, full house," Pickles said with a grin. "Yeah. Let's rock," Nathan said before he stepped up to the microphone. "Are you people ready for the taste of metal?" The crowd cheered. "Our first song is... Hatredcopter!"
Dethklok began playing, and the crowd sat in rapt attention as they listened.
Trent Lane and the rest of Mystic Spiral, sitting in a back row, began nodding their heads in tune with the beat of the song. "Hey... they're pretty good," Trent said.
Down in another row, Daria, Jane, Tom, and Elsie watched the band perform with smiles on their faces. "You were right, Jane. Dethklok... rocks," Daria admitted. Jane smirked.
An hour later, after performing at least two encores of Thunderhorse and Better Metal Snake, Nathan cleared his throat. "And now, for a special song, that we debated playing today. After realizing that we might not come back here again for a very long time, we've decided... that we will finish this concert... with Awaken!"
Dethklok began playing, and everyone watched. However, Elsie began shift oddly in her seat.
"Mustakrakish!
The time has come... (Mustakrakish)
To awaken him (Mustakrakish)!"
Elsie's eyes began to glow as she formed a smile on her face.
"Mustakrakish!"
Daria turned to look as Elsie's skin began to glow and become slightly translucent. "E-Elsie?" Daria asked with a nervous gulp. Jane and Tom looked over at her as well.
"Mustakrakish!
I call upon the ancient lords of the underworld to bring forth this beast, and...
Awaken, awaken, awaken, awaken!"
Elsie began to slowly lift into the air, and great beams of light shot out of her back, forming glowing white wings. Tom, Daria, and Jane looked on in confusion, amazement, awe, and terror.
"Take the land that must be taken!
Awaken, awaken, awaken, awaken!
Devour worlds,
Smite forsaken!"
Elsie rose into the air and her wings spread, soon encompassing the entirety of the stadium width. Everyone began looking around, while Dethklok, oblivious to Elsie's transformation, continued the ancient oath to bring about the destruction and renewal of the world.
"Rise up from your thousandth year of sleep,
Break forth from your grave, eter-nally!"
Elsie's eyes glowed red and she spread her arms.
"I command you to rise!
Rise, rise, rise, rise, rise, rise, rise, rise!"
"Elsie!" Tom shouted in fear.
Tom, Daria, and Jane watched as people all over the stadium began exploding into puddles of orange liquid as Elsie's form grew in size and she began to float through the metal of the pod and rose through the ocean depths.
"I am the conjurer of demons,
I am... the father... of your death!
I.. bring forth... the ancient evil!
I... control... it's every breath!"
In the meeting room of the Tribunal, everyone watched as satellites picked up the imagery of the Giant Glowing Naked Elsie rising above the Earth, looking down on the life forms below.
"My god! What the hell is happening!?" General Grozer exclaimed in a panicked tone.
"I instigate... your misfortune!
With the birth... of killing trolls!"
"Complementation!" Keel Lorenz exclaimed. "It begins!" he shouted. General Grozer took out a pistol and shot Keel in the head. Mr. Salacia merely narrowed his eyes.
"I awaken Armageddon!
Feeding on... a thousand souls!
Awaken!
Awaken... awaken... awaken... awaken... awaken!"
Captain Murphy saw a giant cupcake in his doorway, and ran over to hug it before he burst into LCL.
"Awaken, awaken, awaken, awaken!
Take the land,
That must be taken!"
Multiple members of the Tribunal began exploding into orange liquid. All over the world, small crucifixes of light arose over the spot of every person who was freed from their barriers and merged with a greater consciousness.
Awaken, awaken, awaken, awaken!
Devour worlds,
Smite, forsaken!
Rise up from... your thousandth year of sleep!
Break forth from your grave eter-nally!"
Helen and Jake Morgendorffer watched as everyone in the office of Sebben and Sebben began bursting into puddles of orange goo, except for that perverted hippo.
"Drink, we'll die,
And land... will all... be burned!
Mu-sta-kra-kish!
King and gate to worlds!"
Mr. Salacia frowned as he stared at the image of Elsie on the monitors. She had become humanity's eternal mother, as the great Lilith before her had been.
"I command you to rise!
Rise, rise, rise, rise, rise, rise, rise, rise, rise, rise...
And... AWAKEN!"
Dethklok finished the song and looked around the stadium, seeing only Tom, Daria, and Jane still sitting, staring wide-eyed at them. Nathan scratched his head in confusion. "Mmmmmmmm... Okay. Where'd everybody go?"
Ending Line Break
Ending Theme: Through The Fire And The Flames, by Dragon Force.
* See Episode 015 (2-01): The Fourth Hull.
Well, that was episode 017, and as you can see, Dethklok has brought about Third Impact. Was there ever any doubt? The song Awaken is property of Dethklok and Brenden Small and Williams Street Productions.