Authors Note: Two chapters in one day because why not?

Also, see is you can spot the secret Easter Egg.

Chapter Three: Cheesy Puns

"Cake, give me cake!" Stampy shouted frantically searching in cupboards for cake.

"Stamps," Squid said as his friend ran about the kitchen at light speed. "I'm worried about ya. Y' are running really fast."

"There's no cake!" Stampy exclaimed. "There are only cake ingredients." he lowered his head. "This is real crummy."

Just then, a set of drums appeared out of nowhere, with an airplane pilot in the seat, who played the classic "BA DUM tsssssss!" before disappearing again.

Their eyes widened.

"Stamps," Squid said slowly. "Don't say another pun. Their dangerous."

Stampy nodded and quickly went back to searching for cake. One of the cabinets was full of cheese. This didn't interest him, (He didn't want cheese unless it was cheese cake) but when he was about to close it, he noticed one of the cheese blocks moved. Stampy jumped back in alarm falling on his back.

"Squid th-that cheese just moved!" he said pointing to the cheese.

Squid ran over and looked into the cabinet. The cheese was motionless.

"Stamps," he sighed after staring at the cheese for about half a minute. "I think you need a rest. I can rent us a hotel." He began to walk towards the door.

"No, Squid!" Stampy called out.

Just then, the biggest cheese in the cabinet began to shake.

"Squid..." he said slowly as the cheese began to shake faster.

Squid turned around to see the cheese growing. Soon, before them stood a living, breathing, cheese man who was at the moment putting on a grey sweater that was hung on a shark disguised as a coat rack. This shark has nothing to do with the story, and is just there to make the whole thing seem cooler.

"Boy, this sweater is grate." the cheese man said.

The drums and pilot appeared out of nowhere and played, "BA DUM tsssssss!" then it disappeared again.

The two stared at the cheese blankly. They stood there for a long time.

"I'm AshDubh!" the cheese beamed after a long while.

"You are a talking cheese…" Stampy said slowly.

"Yup!" the cheese confirmed. "By the way, did you like my joke?"

"Yes," Stampy said as thousands of puns popped in his head. "I liked it even though it was pretty cheesy!"

Pilot, drums, BA DUM tsssssss, you get the deal.

"Stamps," Squid said. "What did I tell you about puns?"

Stampy shrugged. "I can't help it. It's a gift." He then turned to look at Ash. "Where did you come from?"

"From that cabinet." Ash replied pointing to the cheese cabinet.

"We know that much," Squid assured him. "But how are you alive?"

Ash shrugged. "Because I didn't die?..." he then reached into the cheese cabinet, grabbed a handful of gouda, and began eating. "But I do know that this cheese is grate."

Pilot and drums, "BA DUM tsssssss!"

Stampy and Squid's eyes widened. Not because of the pilot/drums thingamajig, but because the cheese was eating his own kind.

"Um…" Stampy began slowly.

"Yup?" Ash winked.

"You're kind of being cannibalistic…" Stampy grimaced.

Ash put this into thought. "But it tastes really good." he pointed out.

Stampy sighed and decided it wasn't worth the argument. He turned around to notice that Squid was gone and the door was just closing.

"Uh oh, don't tell me Squid got himself in trouble again!" Stampy panicked as he ran out the door.

Ash was alone. "Now I'm here by myself, uh, talking to myself. That, that's chaos." he said to himself before running after the cat.

"Squid!" Stampy called out as he ran down the street. "Squid, you there?"

He wasn't watching the street, and he was nearly run over by a car. He apologized as the car honked at him and he continued going.

"Hello!" Ash said as he ran alongside the feline.

"Sorry! No time to talk, gotta find Squid!" Stampy panicked.

"You mean that guy with the party hat over in the hotel?" Ash asked pointing to a hotel with a glass doorway to the right of them.

Through the glass, Squid was visible at the front desk. Stampy face-slapped/paw-slapped and ran in.

"Squid, what are you doing?" he asked.

"Getting us a room in the hotel," Squid replied. "I thought you might need a rest."

And so, Stampy and Squid spent a week or so in the galaxy city hotel with their new friend the talking cheese, Ash. Everything was going fine with Stampy eating/selling cakes, and getting plenty of money. Then one morning, Stampy turned on the TV.