A/N: Hello my lovelies! I am so sorry for taking forever to update, I am very bad with updating I know! I hope you all had wonderful holidays and hope 2014 will be awesome for each and every one of you.
Thank you to everyone who Favorited/Followed this story and to everyone who reviewed the last chapter. It means a lot.
A special thank you to the amazing and wonderful Rachael for Beta-reading and editing this chapter, and obviously for being so patient with me. Sooo Thank you Rache :)
And here I leave you with this chapter hoping you'll like it. Reviews are very appreciated.
Happy reading..
"Hey Maura" Frankie salutes invading the room startling the moonstruck doctor.
Frankie had already got accustomed to dropping the formality while talking to the prestigious doctor. It was expected really especially after she invited his mother to stay at her guest house. Their brother-sister bond had naturally grown however unexpected it might once of seemed.
"Oh, hello Frankie" Maura replies shaking herself back to the present.
"I brought you the knife I found, as Jane instructed" He informs her trying to ignore the odd state the M.E seems to be in. "I thought I would find her here?"
"She left few minutes ago" Responding she touches her lips with her fingers as the memory of Jane impulsively kissing her penetrates her thoughts. "Y- You may put the murder weapon on the autopsy table. I'll take it to the lab, I have to go there anyway". Trying to hide the blush heating up her cheeks she looks intensely at the stomach on the autopsy table.
Noting this change, Frankie knots his eyebrows in concern and asks "Maura are you alright? You seem quite.." he pauses trying to find the right word "I don't know, distracted or something". Placing the object in his hand on the steel table Frankie looks at Maura out of the corner of his eye.
Shifting her focus to Frankie Maura debates whether she should say anything, and if not then how to avoid the truth without lying. "I have felt better before but I am alright. Thank you for asking Frankie."
Unconvinced he tries a different approach "Well if you need anything... if you want me to call Jane-",
"NO" it comes out sharper than she intends interrupting the tall man. "No, there's no need to bother your sister now" she tries again more calmly.
Astounded by the intensity of her reaction he proposes again "Maura, are you sure you're alright? Did Jane do anything? Because if she did I swear to God..." he trails off unsure of what he would do or say.
Defeated by her emotions she puts the stomach down, takes off her gloves and turns to Frankie. "No Frankie it is unnecessary" she starts sighing. Finding herself unable to stop she continues "Jane and I merely had a misunderstanding. I don't know what... What got into her... She has acted very strangely... I- I don't understand her" she wanders, lifting her hands up in defeat. "Whatever I say or do seems to... Outrage her or set her off" She pauses to take a breath waiting for Frankie to say something "There is something bothering her and she is hiding it from me. She's shutting me out" she continues when he remains silent.
"You know, I am not trying to defend Jane in any way Maura" he says this in a calm tone. "But I know my sister; she would never hurt you on purpose... Maybe she's going through something or processing things" he explains "I mean you know how she is. Never been any good with words.. Just give her some time I'm sure she'll come around."
"I hope you're right Frankie because honestly I don't know what else to do" she confesses defeated.
"Well doc for all we know it could be something connected to Samantha" he says waving his hands in the air. "I mean I don't know if she told you about this but things aren't so smooth between the two lately" he proceeds lowering his voice as if he's trying to keep this as a secret regardless of the fact there's no one else there.
"Maybe you're right. I have noticed tension at the mention of her name" She agrees "But I'm her friend, if something is bothering her she should talk to me about it instead of treating me almost like a stranger don't you think?"
"Just give her some time doc alright?, Jane loves you, she'll come around" the taller man tries to comfort her "But well you know, I can kick her a- sorry, behind" he corrects his language before continuing "For you if you want me to" he jokes alleviating the atmosphere by earning an honest chuckle from the M.E.
"Thank you Frankie" she conveys smiling sincerely "I really needed that."
"No problem Maura, that's what family's here for" he says giving her the best reassuring smile he can muster. "Alright I guess I should head upstairs see if I can be useful with anything" He excuses himself tapping the blue hat on his head "Have a good day doc, and if you need anything..." he trails off needless to continue the sentence.
"I know where to find you" she continues for him nodding and blushing at the world 'family'. She already knows that the Rizzoli's are her family, but the use of this world made her heart warm up.
"Alright then, I should get going" he excuses himself before leaving the morgue.
Jane fills Korsak and Frost in about the latest discoveries of Doctor Isles. The links between the little girl and John Davis. Frost on the other hand fills her in with the information he got about the victim. The little research he did while she was away proving fruitful. They have an address, the name of the wife and even the name of the little girl.
"You know I was going to tell you before you stormed in here, but you didn't give me a chance." Frost admonishes playfully. "I found the wife, Miranda Davis, and the little girl's name, our Jane Doe, her name is Amy Davis, she's 7 years old."
"Damn. Good Job Partner" she encourages him "But it's a little weird that they didn't file a missing persons report for the little girl don't you think?" Jane says thoughtfully, turning away from the victim's pictures on the board, talking to herself more than to anybody else.
She nibbles her thumb raising one eyebrow in concentration then turns to Frost patting his shoulder once "Come 'on partner let's have a little chat with the wife". She grabs her blazer and heads towards the door. Before she takes even one step out of the precinct she stops dead at the surprise visit she gets.
"Hello Samantha" Frost greets her sensing the tension growing between the two.
"What the hell are you doing here?" Jane bursts out with both her hands on her side and a very disturbed look on her face.
"Detective Frost" she greets back smiling at him before turning to Jane "I came to talk" she admits dropping the smile into a more serious looking face.
"I have work" Jane dismisses her simply.
"Jane it's alright I can go with Frost instead of you" Korsak offers sincerely.
"No, Vince thank you, but I've got this" she rejects the offer as gently as she can manage, raising one palm up as if physically trying to stop him.
"Jane, it's alright, I think Korsak and I can handle a little chat" Frost insists noticing how intensely desperate Samantha seems to be. "Really we've got this" he continues putting one hand on the brunette's shoulder before proceeding playfully "Besides, you can't come in this condition, I don't wanna have to deal with your trashy mood while interrogating a widow."
Jane shifts her gaze from Frost to Korsak to Samantha pondering and weighing her options. It is true that Korsak and Frost can take care of this little visit, but does she really want to sit and talk to this woman after what she did? Is she really ready for this? Maybe she should get the closure she needs now so she can move on and treat Maura the way she deserves to be treated. Especially considering that she's been really hostile with the M.E .
FOR MAURA.
She looks at Korsak again as he nods in encouragement and reassurance.
"Alright" she finally accepts placing her hands on her hips and gazing in space waiting for the two other detectives to leave.
"What do you want?" Jane asks unpleasantly.
Taking a step forward, Sam starts "Jane, I... I'm so very-"
"No, I don't wanna hear it" The detective interrupts her taking a step back. "If you're here to apologize you're wasting your time as well as mine" she continues as she turns her back to the other woman and sliding her hands into her pockets. She is not going to let this woman play her anymore.
"What do you want me to say, Jane?" the woman breaks in frustration squeezing her hands together.
"How long has this been going on?" Jane asks in a low intimidating tone turning to face her "This was not a one time thing, was it?"
"Jane, I don't think-"
"Answer the goddamn question Sam" she interrupts her, voice still low and intimidating.
"No. Jane, it wasn't" Samantha finally admits with guilt clear in her voice. She waits for Jane to say something, to react, maybe to shout right in her face. But the detective doesn't say anything; she only closes her eyes as she forms her palms into fists on both her sides in anger and hurt.
"Jane, you're always away solving murders and working, and if you're not working you're with Maura doing God knows what. And I was-"
"There was nothing going on between me and Maura" Jane bursts out all at once, interrupting the accusations that Sam is throwing at her not caring whether or not she's attracting anybody's attention to them.
"Was? Past tense!" The other brunette reflects slightly leaning forward while raising her eyebrows.
"What?" Jane asked shaking her head in confusion.
"You said was. There WAS nothing going on between you and Maura" Sam explains, emphasizing the word 'was' impatiently before she asks "So now there is?" shaking her head and shrugging her shoulders.
"You have no right" Jane starts with a low dangerous tone and a threatening finger pointed towards the other woman who interrupts her sharply.
"I have every right, Jane"
"You have lost that privilege when you fucked another woman" Jane's voice is getting lower and lower and more dangerous each passing second.
"You're never gonna let that go, are you?" Sam lowers her voice again in frustration, waving her hands in the air before brushing one hand through her hair pulling it backwards.
"You're damn right I won't" Jane answers as a matter of fact. "You know what Samantha? I don't even care. You can go play around with whomever you want. I'm done." The detective states holding her hands up in defense and exhaustion before throwing them back down again and turning her back to the other woman distracting herself with anything she finds on her desk.
"Jane, no. Please. Don't just-" Sam begs with her tears almost betraying her.
Jane suddenly interrupts this outburst bluntly "No, Sam. You're right." She pauses for a while trying to think about what she's going to say next and how to say it. "I'm always working. I don't have time to give to you" she continues "Which does not justify your actions by the way. But that's it, I'm tired of pretending, I'm tired of all of this" she waves one hand gesturing between them before she proceeds "So yes I'm done. We're done." she pauses again trying to sink in the words she's saying. "This is over Sam, It's been over for a while now" her voice is calm and low and so determined to end this conversation so she can go to Maura and fix things before it's too late. "I give you a week to pack all your stuff and move out"
"But Jane we can wor-" Sam starts with a lump in her throat that is very eminent in her voice but gets interrupted by a male husky voice.
"Jane" he stops as he notices Samantha's presence "Oh, hey Sam" he greets extending his hand to shake the woman's hand.
"Hey Frankie" Samantha responds extending her own.
"Am I interrupting something?" Frankie asks glancing between the two women sensing the tension in the room.
"No" Jane answers immediately. "Sam was just leaving now" She states glancing at the other brunette.
"This isn't over Jane" Sam insists.
"It is for me" the detective husks confidently before the other woman turns to leave. "One week Sam."
Sam doesn't say a word. She only turns around and leaves the room before her tears start streaming down her face. Having a breakdown in front of Frankie or anybody for that matter, is the last thing she wants right now.
Standing there confused not knowing what is going on in his sister's world, Frankie looks at Jane and asks her "What the hell Janie?" Worry evident in his voice, face and even posture.
"Drop it Frankie" Jane tries avoiding her brothers eyes. She is not in the mood for conversations right now.
"No, Jane I'm not dropping anything" He almost yells at her but not wanting to draw anymore attention he decides on a lower tune. "What the hell are you doing? What is going on with you?" He interrogates her in a tone loud enough that only Jane can hear him. "First I go down to find Maura in a miserable condition because of you and now I come up here to walk on whatever is going on between you on your girlfriend?" What the hell are you doing Jane?"
"She's not my girlfriend" is all that Jane is able to come up with.
"What are you-?" Frankie starts asking her not knowing what she's talking about but gets interrupted by Jane's quick explanation.
"She cheated, Frankie" She says defeated and her eyes watering at the thought of her girlfriend's betrayal. Her voice is full of sorrow and pain and anger.
"God, Jane. I'm sorry I didn't know" the taller man says apologetically.
"Yeah, and it wasn't a one time thing" Jane continues pain is still registered in her voice "But you know what's worse than that" and it's more of a statement than a question "I took it all on Maura. On the one pure person I know. See how stupid I am brother?" She pauses mocking herself but not expecting her brother to answer. "I don't even know how to fix this, or if I can fix it" she continues ignoring the lump in her throat while tears forming in her eyes, just at bay ready to fall at any moment she lets them. But she's not one to cry in front of anybody, not even Frankie. So she swallows her tears and takes a deep breath before letting out an exaggerated sigh. The only person who has ever seen her cry is Maura and she's not going to change that anytime soon.
"Jane I'm really sorry, but you know what? Just talk to her, apologize and she'll forgive you. I know she cares about you too much not to" Frankie says approaching his sister to put a supportive hand on her shoulder which makes Jane's brown eyes meet his similar ones.
She lifts her hand to pat the one on her shoulder ad gives him a weak smile before she speaks. "And tell her what?" she pauses briefly while raising her eyebrows "I'm sorry I used you? I'm sorry I don't regret it?" she continues sarcasm evident in her voice.
"Whaaa?" Frankie asks with his eyebrows shooting up to his hairline in surprise "What do you mean?" he asks her pulling his hand back.
"I think it's a bit obvious what I meant" Jane responds her voice low but not shameful then turns away from her brother.
"Damn about time" Frankie says excitedly clasping his hands together.
"Really, Frankie? Now?" Jane turns back to her brother furrowing her eyebrows in disbelief. "You joke about this now? Besides what do you mean about time?" she continues with one hand on her hip and the other gesturing into space.
"Come on Jane. I think the only person who doesn't know you have feelings for Maura is you. I bet even Sam knows."
"Damn. That obvious huh? she whispers to herself while pulling her hair back with her free hand.
Not missing this he suggests "Just go talk to her Janie, I'm sure you'll work it out."
"Thanks Frankie" Taking her jacket she pats her brother's shoulder grateful for his support and heads to the morgue.
Pushing the button of the elevator impatiently with one finger she stands there waiting for the doors to open. She starts thinking about what she's going to say to the medical examiner, how she'll apologize to the woman she loves for the way she acted. Is Maura ever going to forgive her? Did she just lose the most important person in her life?
A few seconds later and the doors are open. She waits for the few officers in uniform to exit the elevator before she enters. Nobody follows her into the elevator which she thanks god for. The last thing she needs is a small conversation with one of the detectives.
DAMMIT RIZZOLI HOW ARE YOU GONNA FIX THIS, YOU'LL BE LUCK IF SHE EVEN LOOKS AT YOU.
Checking her watch she notices that it is 7:30 Pm which means Maura is probably still in the morgue, possibly in her office. The Medical examiner never leaves the morgue or the office early, she always likes to make sure she has studied the body and the files very carefully to the point of perfection before she calls it a day. This is an advantage for Jane at the moment since she's hoping to God she'll find her still downstairs.
GOD! HOW MANY THINGS CAN HAPPEN IN ONE DAY!
The ring of the elevator sounds declaring she has reached her destination. It manages to shake her out of her thoughts. The doors open and Jane strides out and along the corridor towards Maura's office. hoping she'll find the committed Doctor still there like she usually does.
She enters the morgue carefully not wanting to startle the Medical examiner. Once inside she realizes that no one is there. Looking around the morgue she then focuses her eyes on the light coming out of the medical examiner's office windows.
THANK GOD SHE'S STILL HERE she thinks as she attentively approaches the source of the light.
She knocks on the door hesitantly afraid of Maura's response when she realizes it's her behind the door. She doesn't need to wait long before she hears the delicate voice of her lover calling out "Come in" with sadness and exhaustion unmistakable in her voice.
She pushes the door open slowly watching the doctor as she enters. Maura is sitting behind her desk looking tired and a bit drained. Wavy hair flowing on her shoulders and her hazel eyes focused on her computer.
DAMN, SHE'S STILL BEAUTIFUL EVEN WHEN SHE'S TIRED
"Jane" the blonde says in surprise as soon as she realizes who's the knocker and closes her laptop.
"Why do you sound so surprised?" is all what comes out of Jane's mouth.
"I'm not in the mood for another fight, Jane" Sighing she looks down at her hands absentmindedly playing with one of her rings.
"Oh no no, I'm not.. I didn't.." The detective stutters unable to begin. "I'm not here to fight. I came to apologize." Finally deciding on these words as she rubs the scars on the back of her hand out of habit.
The doctor shifts her attention from the ring to Jane without saying anything, thus letting Jane continue with what she has to say.
"I treated you very bad.. badly, and you didn't.. you don't deserve it" the detective continues approaching Maura's desk cautiously. I'm really sorry. I don't even know how I'm gonna make it up to you or how to prove to you that I really mean my apology but I really do mean it." She pauses waiting to see if Maura has any response. But nothing. So she continues.
"I don't regret that night Maura" Jane admits looking right into those hazel eyes she loves and tries to convey as much sincerity as possible with her eyes. "I don't. It was probably the best night of my life." She continues not breaking the connection between her brown eyes and the hazel ones across the room. Watching as the blonde furrows her brows in what seems as confusion.
"What about Sam?" is the only response Jane gets from the M.E who's voice doesn't get much higher than a whisper.
"Nothing. We're not together anymore." Jane admits breaking the eye contact to look at her hands rubbing the scars. Looking up to find a very confused look taking over the blonde's face. "I caught her cheating in my apartment" she explains with her eyes back on her hands again.
"It was right before you came to me, wasn't it? Maura asks as she gets up from behind her desk and walks to the other side of it leaning with her hands placed on the hard wood on each side for extra balance.
"Maur" Jane says astonished by the accuracy of the question.
"Oh my god it was" Maura verbalizes clasping her hands together at the realization of the truth. "So what, it was a payback?" She continues raising both her eyebrows to almost reach her hairline.
"What? No. Maura no, it was not a payback" Jane frowns with a bit of pain evident in her voice, hurt by the blonde's speculations and pauses to form the words she's about to say in as much honesty and sincerity as she can muster. "Maura when I witnessed what I did" she pauses again taking few steps forward until she's close enough to hold the medical examiner's hands with her own. Searching for Maura's eyes and continues only when hazel meets brown "The only thing I was thinking about is you. The only thing I was sure of is that I was broken and you're the only person to put me back together."
"Jane."
"No let me finish... please." Jane interrupts her looking down at their joined hands before meeting the doctor's eyes again. "Maura, the only thing that Samantha's actions did to me was wake me up. I know I didn't show you that by the way I acted afterwards and I'm very sorry about that. I'll keep apologizing for the rest of my life if that's what it takes" she pauses for a breath.
Maura on the other hand is looking into those dark brown eyes overwhelmed by the truth and honesty she finds in them. If she's surprised by Jane's vulnerability she doesn't show it.
"I was scared of my own feelings and I didn't want you to have to deal with Samantha. I was scared that you wouldn't return the same feelings. I guess I was a coward, which is not an excuse I know" Jane continues noticing that she's starting to ramble now.
"I thought showing you my feelings was enough" Maura's voice is low and sad while she looks down at both their hands.
"It was. God Maura it was more than enough" Jane admits releasing one hand to lift the Medical examiner's chin so she's looking into her eyes again. "Maura realizing my feelings towards you made me feel so happy. Happier than I ever was. I don't wanna lose that feeling. I don't wanna lose you." Jane continues as tears start falling slowly down her flushed cheeks. At this point she doesn't bother to wipe them or to fight them. She gathers the strength in her voice again.
"Maura I am so sorry I hurt you so much. You don't deserve this. You deserve so much better. I screwed up and I am so so sorry. If you just give me one more chance... Just one more chance to prove to you how much I love you" Jane practically begs as tears are still streaming down her face and breaking her voice.
"Jane" the blonde starts with her voice betraying her as her own tears flow down her cheeks. "Jane, I... I don't know what to say" she gathers what's left of her strength pausing as the detective wipes the tears off of her face while ignoring the ones on her own.
"I'm not expecting you to forgive me just like that Maura. I don't deserve your forgiveness" The detective says while brushing Maura's cheek. "But I promise you.. I promise that I'm gonna work so hard to earn your forgiveness she proceeds with honesty and determination filling her voice.
Maura's heart is breaking at the sight of Jane begging. She doesn't need any more apologies to forgive Jane. She knows how much it takes for the detective to form all her feelings into words and she knows that Jane means every single word she said. In fact she had forgiven her the moment she said sorry the first time.
Maura doesn't know how, but she finds herself closing the distance between them and taking the detective into her arms and hugging her tightly burying her face into the crook of Jane's neck.
"I believe you" is all that escapes Maura's delicate lips.
Out of any possible reaction Jane didn't see this coming. But she does not reject Maura's warm embrace. Instead her eyes flutter shut and she puts her arms around the doctor, hugging her back appreciatively and lovingly. "I"m gonna make this right Maura... I promise" she whispers as she strokes the honey blond locks gently while a new wave of tears offend her cheeks.
...
..
.
"I promise".