Disclaimer: Characters do not belong to me, they belong to Masashi Kishimoto.
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Spaghetti and Burials
'BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP.'
Naruto growled and threw his pillow at his alarm clock. Having to wake up early was one thing – but having to do it twice was simply suicidal. Sighing, Naruto hauled himself out of bed and hit the 'off' button. He then cautiously checked his watch earlier, which he'd retrieved from his bag, seeing as his alarm clock was under threat of being tampered with. For the second time today, Naruto got ready for class. However, unlike the first time he had enough time to have a shower and put on some socks. He stepped out of the room and locked it behind him.
Bastard Sasuke hadn't returned to his room like Naruto did, making it seem like he got up regularly at 6am. This idea seemed strange and inhuman to Naruto.
'Waaaait. Sasuke isn't in the room and I have-' Naruto glanced at his watch '-15 minutes until I gotta be in class. Hm. Breakfast or...revenge.' Naruto grinned. What a stupid question.
- - - - -
"KIBA! KIBA, OPEN THE DAMN DOOR!" shouted Naruto breathlessly, banging on the door with the number 6 above it. "Come on! Please!" he begged.
"What the fuck do you want, Uzumaki?" growled Kiba, flinging his door open. His eyes went wide when he was faced by a mattress in front of his door.
"Oh. HiKibahowareyou? Merrymorningwillyoulookafterthisformepleasethanks!" Naruto shoved the mattress at Kiba, sending him stumbling back into the room. The blond grabbed Kiba's door and slammed it shut before cackling like a maniac and running for the stairs.
'That'll teach Bastard-Sasuke!' He thought triumphantly. He was aware that he was late for his first lesson – the damned mattress had been heavier than he thought – but he was grinning to himself as he imagined the Bastard's reaction later on.
Naruto slammed into the heavy entrance doors to building B and shoved through them, running across the concrete toward the sport centre. He had originally thought that physical education lessons had been held in the main building, but upon asking Kiba the other boy had explained that there were a few small classrooms in the sport centre, specifically for students training in PE – Naruto being one of these.
The blond burst through the entrance doors of the sport centre and looked for room 14a. Sure enough, it was near the end of the corridor. There were also 3 other classrooms – 14b, 14c and 14d, but the rest of the rooms looked like they led into training halls, outside or changing rooms.
"Sorry I'm late! I got a little lost," Naruto grinned apologetically as he entered the classroom, using the first, and lamest, excuse that popped into mind. What was he supposed to say? "I'm sorry I'm late because I was sabotaging my bastard roommate's mattress"? Naruto was caught off-guard when he was enveloped in...Green, and shook wildly from side to side.
"Another new, youthful student arrives at my class! Never has there been such a joyous day!" the teacher whom was clad in green spandex shouted, tears of joy streaming down his face. Naruto wriggled out of his iron grip and stumbled toward the first empty seat, thoroughly scared. Not only was this guy's outfit terrible, but also he had the worst haircut ever – a shiny bowlcut – and his eyebrows...Well. Let's just say they resembled angry hedges in a gale. The teacher wiped his eyes and grinning at Naruto, his teeth gleaming, and gave him two thumbs up.
"Naruto Uzumaki, if I am correct! I am your new physical education teacher! Call me Mr. Gai if you will!" he grinned even wider. Naruto stared like a rabbit in headlights and nodded vigorously – anything to save him from any more death-hugs.
"As most of you youths will probably know, the first day only consists of you visiting each one of your teachers so that you will learn what rooms you are in, what equipment you may or may not need to buy, and to get to know your new teachers a bit. Please, my youthful students of joy, call me Mr. Gai!" the two thumbs up appeared again, "As for equipment, as I am going to be teaching the majority of your courses, you will need to buy four different textbooks from me – one for each course," Gai paused to slam his fist on a pile of textbooks lying on his desk, "and obviously, your training gear for the physical lessons. But most of you will already have that. Now, youthful students, go and be youthful in my fellow teacher's classrooms!" he grinned again, and everyone all but sprinted out of the room, Naruto not far behind.
Looking at his timetable once he was safely out of the sports centre building, Naruto could see that he only had two other teachers – the joys of being a student studying PE. He only had 6 courses, and Gai, being the head PE teacher, taught 4 of those. The other course he had to attend now was science – scientific foundations, which was also required. Naruto had a teacher called Kabuto Yakushi.
The blond followed the stream of students from the class that had just left Gai; most seemed to be going the same way as he was. Naruto guessed that they had taken the same course as him. Naruto entered the main hall and followed a couple of students down the corridor on the right of the building. Sure enough, there was a metal sign saying "Science" swinging from the roof. He looked for the room that he was supposed to be in, and darted into it, relieved that he wasn't late this time.
Thankfully, this teacher was less scary. He had long silver hair that was tied back – despite only being in his late twenties, Naruto suspected – and circular glasses. He was leaning against his shiny white desk, obviously waiting for everyone to take a seat. Naruto took the one closest to the door.
"My name is Kabuto Yakushi," he began slowly, "Just call me Kabuto. Basically, in this course you will be learning about the human body; the bones and muscles, important systems in our body that we need to keep healthy and the mechanics of body movement. You will know by now that your other teacher – Gai – is teaching you PE pedagogy, movement analysis, practicum's and professional education program. Pedagogy is basically a course on how to teach PE, movement analysis briefs you on what you need to teach. Professional education programs simply tell you about the issues that teachers face – and lastly, practicum's are exactly what they sound like: practicing to teach – and then learning how to do it better," he paused. "Any questions?"
Naruto looked around the room and was relieved when no one spoke up.
"Okay, well, good. The only thing you will need to buy from this class is this textbook on the human body – fifty dollars. You should know that your last teacher in this course is Iruka Umino. He will be teaching you the last course that you need – health education. He is located next door to this classroom, conveniently, as he is also a science teacher. You may leave now," he finished, waving a hand dismissively and turning his back on the class. Naruto obediently shot out of his seat and back into the hallway.
Yawning, Naruto trudged into the classroom that was next to Kabuto's, and sat down again in the seat closest to the door. A quick escape for lunch. Naruto thanked God as Iruka seemed more sane than Gai, and kinder than Kabuto.
'Maybe I don't have to throw myself off the top of building B after all.'
"No doubt you have already been briefed on almost the entire of your course by Kabuto, I am just going to quickly explain what will be included in this course, and what you will need to buy," Iruka paused to grin at his silent students, "Health education is extremely simple – it teaches you about diseases and drugs. It also teaches you enough about health so that you are able to teach it to your own students – once you have them. You will only need to buy one textbook – this one," he patted a pile of textbooks with his right hand, "I don't really have much else to say...Gai is insane, but he'll grow on you," Iruka winced, along with some of the other students in the class – Naruto included. "Good luck to all of you in your courses to becoming a physical education teacher – I'm sure all of you will do fine. Welcome to the university – and I just want to remind you that there are no classes on weekends, so seeing as today is Friday, I'll see you all in two days! Oh, and last thing. Next week you are all starting a project, which requires you to go on a trip for three days. More information on Monday – have fun!" he grinned cheerfully and waved. Naruto sprung out of his seat and bolted for the door, grinning that he had no more lectures to attend now.
- - - - -
"Naruto! There you are! WHAT THE FUCK?" roared Kiba, hitting Naruto around the head with the palm of his hand as he sat down. "CARE TO EXPLAIN WHY YOU THREW A MATTRESS AT ME THIS MORNING, BASTARD?" Naruto cringed and made motions with his hands for Kiba to shut up.
"Shhh. He might hear you," Naruto whispered, frantically looking around the canteen. This earned him another smack around the head, courtesy of Kiba.
"Mind explaining why I have a mattress in my room?" Kiba raised an eyebrow. Naruto – glad that the Bastard was nowhere in sight, turned his attention back to the pissed brunet.
"Revenge," he said simply. Kiba understood and laughed.
"Nice. Now the Uchiha is a mattress-less bastard," he snorted and gave Naruto a high-five. There was suddenly a change in the cheerful atmosphere and Naruto turned his head to see Sasuke walking past.
"Geez. That guy walks around with enough hate-aura to make people drop dead. I don't see why the girls obsess over him so much," Naruto raised an eyebrow as the unapproachable Sasuke was swarmed by a mob of drooling girls, all batting their eyelashes and flouncing about in front of him. The Bastard remained indifferent and stormed past them all, blatantly ignoring them. The girls seemed crestfallen and then scurried back over to where they had been sat previously, probably to gush about how the Bastard had 'glared in their direction' and how that made him 'totally in love with them'. Naruto snorted and rested his head on the table, extremely tired.
'Sasuke's fault for waking me up at 6am,´Naruto mentally groaned.
A few minutes passed by and Naruto's head stayed on the table and Kiba eventually went silent. Naruto half-raised his head and was about to ask why the other guy had gone silent so suddenly, when he felt something wet slipping down his head.
"Gah! Gross!" He yelled, sitting bolt upright and feeling some of 'the stuff' slipping off his head and onto the floor from the momentum. Horrified, Naruto reached up with one of his hands to pat the top of his head, and pulled off... a string of spaghetti covered in bolognaise sauce. Naruto was disgusted and used both of his hands to wipe the oozy mess onto the floor behind him – then turning to face the figure stood by the end of the table. His jaw dropped when he saw Bastard-Sasuke stood there motionlessly, an eyebrow raised and a smirk on his perfect features.
"Sorry," he drawled. "Didn't see you there." Naruto looked at the empty tray and plate in his hands, and instantly worked out that the bastard had "accidentally" dumped an entire plate of spaghetti bolognaise on his head. Oh yeah, sure.
'If that was an accident, I'd eat my hat – if I had one.'
"You BASTARD!" Naruto yelled at Sasuke. "You did that on purpose!"
"No I never. I just apologised, didn't I?" he narrowed his eyes at the blond. Naruto stood up angrily; his chair sent screeching across the floor. This attracted a lot of unknown attention from everyone else in the canteen.
"Yeah, sure, you just "accidentally" dump an entire plate of food on someone! Why are you such an arrogant, stuck-up bastard? I never did anything wrong, so why do you hate my fucking guts so much?!" Naruto yelled back. This made Sasuke narrow his eyes even further, but then his face returned to it's usual mask of indifference and calm.
"So. You wanna buy me more food, since you're wearing the food I just bought?" he smirked. Naruto snapped. He swung a fist at Sasuke for what felt like the millionth time in two days, but of course, it was blocked. He'd obviously been expecting it.
"Bastard!" cried Naruto, swinging his feet again. This time Sasuke caught it, and pushed hard, sending Naruto stumbling back into the table. Naruto jumped forward and angled another punch – this time hitting the Bastard's jaw. Sasuke's face remained expressionless and he hardly moved, although Naruto know it must've hurt because there had been a satisfying cracking noise. Sasuke pushed Naruto again, harder this time, making him gasp as his back hit the hard table. The raven then kneed him in the stomach, making him double over, and then pushed him hard again so he was sent sprawling onto the floor. Naruto gasped and gritted his teeth, struggling into a sitting position on the floor. There were a lot of people staring.
Naruto wiped the blood away from his mouth and glared up at the raven-haired boy whom was still stood before him. Without a word, the pale boy turned and strode away, pushing though the crowds of people who'd been watching and exiting the canteen. Naruto struggled to his feet and plopped down on his chair, rubbing his stomach and wincing. Kiba was sat staring at him, his jaw dropped in only what could be described as shock.
"What?" Naruto raised an eyebrow and winced.
"It's just...I've known that heartless bastard for at least four years, and that is the biggest reaction I've ever seen from him. Usually he remains so...expressionless. People always try to wind him up, never worked," he grinned nervously. "Geez, Naruto, he must really hate your guts." Naruto furrowed his brow.
"I am aware of that," he spat out. "Do you know where...I can get a shovel?" Kiba raised an eyebrow at the sudden change of subject. "I've got something I need to bury," Naruto grinned evilly, and Kiba stared blankly. Naruto sighed.
"Don't worry – I'm not going to kill the bastard. I just noticed a particularly lovely flowerbed outside this building earlier – and, well, you want to get rid of that mattress I dumped on you this morning, don't you?" Kiba and Naruto grinned, exchanging high-fives.