He walked slowly; step by step he could feel his hands shaking. He's not afraid of meeting him, he's afraid knowing what runs in his mind.
As the elevator rang, signaling him he reached the floor, the door opened and he stepped out of it.
"Chuck, you in here!" Dan shouted, looking at the place.
Chuck emerged from the kitchen, holding a glass of scotch.
"Drinking early in the morning?" Dan asked again.
"Humpty dumdum, you're back!" His arms wide open for a hug.
"You're drunk" Dan started. He didn't give him a hug, he just stared at him.
"I'm celebrating your home coming" Chuck answered and grinned. Dan helped him to the sofa. "Want something to drink? I have a lot" Chuck slurred.
"Nope. Thanks, I'm here to ask you something, but I don't think it's the right time though." Chuck eyed him, shook his head and smiled.
"I know you'll ask about her," Chuck tapped his back and continued "Go for it"
"What happened?" Dan asked.
*flashback*
Chuck and Blair went out of the limo, with baggages in hand; they both entered the helicopter saved for them to go to Las Vegas. It's always been Blair's dream to go to Vegas, where glitz and glamour awaits.
"I promise we'll be happy blair, we'll always be together." Chuck assured her while holding her hands. Blair looked outside the window and finally, she could see the lights of Vegas. She smiled, she remembered how Dan also wants to go to Vegas and watch Cirque de Solei, and he's always been a fan.
When they reached the Rooftop of the MGM hotel, Chuck held her hand; they reached their hotel room that looks almost like the Penthouse: chandeliers, glass windows, soft mattress, antique decorations;
"Just like home.." Chuck proudly said. "We'll stay here for a week, Let the Grimaldi get tired of looking at the airport and we'll go to San Paolo," He laid down his plan. Blair just smiled and took his hand. She wasn't sure this is what she wanted; all she knew is that in her mind, running away with the man she loved for 4 years is the right thing to do.
What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, and for a week both live the life of a total socialite; parties, casinos, sex and alcohol.
"My assistant informed me that the Grimaldis went back to Monaco, we could go now" Chuck informed Blair with a smile, he was happy and Blair knew it.
For an hour they started packing and headed back to New York; Chuck needed to get their fake Passport's he asked to be made, and from there they will leave to Brazil. A place no one would dare to look for them.
They held hand in hand while entering JFK, hoods covered their faces, sunglasses completely fill up their disguise.
"Stay here, I'll look for our man who has our passports" Chuck whispered on Blair's ear. She just smiled in return.
And there at one corner of the airport, she saw a girl, reading the book that made her heart jump a little, INSIDE. She smiled, proud of what her boy best friend had made from his life. She sat near the girl and started;
" I know the author of that book" she proudly stated with a big smile.
"Well I know him too, he signed this book for me" the girl answered with pride and irritation.
"Well I know him as I mean closely, his my best friend." Blair explained looking pass the girl's irritated voice.
"You mean you're Sabrina?" The girl asked with eyes wide opened and as if looking she's about to cry stars trucked.
"What? Oh no no no! I'm Blair, the girl who Clair was inspired by" Blair answered. She wanted to explain more but the girl was more eager to talk rather than get information.
"Oh my gosh! You're Clair Carlyle?" The girl shouted, hands shaking, with teary eyes.
"Blair actually that's my name... Blair Waldorf.." Blair interrupted but the girl no longer listening to her.
"You we're the love of Dylan's life.." The girl exclaimed. Blair stunned unable to respond; she hasn't really read the whole book yet, she just read the part where Dan wrote them about having sex, but not him being in love with her, because that would be impossible.. Right?
"What did you just say?" Blair asked. The girl eyed her, smirks;
"You haven't read the book are you?" The girl asked,
" No... Not really, we have a fall out after me reading the part where he wrote about us having sex." Blair explained. "And then I have to run away from my wedding day, I have no time"
"Why are you running away?" The girl curiously asked.
"Because I don't love who I'm marrying with" Blair answered.
"Are you running away with Dylan? Is he here?" The girl asked excitedly.
"What? No! No! That would be absurd. I'm here with Chuck, Charlie trout in the book" Blair again explained. She smiled proudly.
"You're running away with that man? Why?" The girl looked disappointed and sad.
"Well... He's the love of my life... I think" Blair tried to explain, but nothing good is coming from her mind, no good argument why she's running away with chuck. She herself doesn't even know why she's running away with him.
"You think? Or you know?" The girl asked. "Because that's two different things"
Blair smiled at the girl who knew things more than she did.
"Charlie Trout died in the book, you know why? Because he never let people in, that's just how he is. Clair felt weak when she's with him, thought she was stronger? Nah... She felt like a prisoner on her own obsession... I don't think that's good"
Blair was unable to respond to the girl's statement but instead stared at her.
"You should read the book... It's all about you. All about Dylan's love for you" The girl suggested. "And maybe you'll know more about how you truly feel"
"Why?" Blair asked, not even knowing what her question is about.
"Because seeing you unsure with Mr. Chuck or whoever he is, made me think, Dylan's love for Clair is not a one-sided thing. I think Clair loves him too, just too afraid to admit it." A female voice talked on the speaker, " oh that's me.." The girl exclaimed. She closed the book and about to put it in her back but hesitated, she held the book and offered it to Blair, "You have this, Read it.. You'll see" The girl smiled and waved goodbye.
Blair tried to remember her life the past few months, and all she could was herself spending more time with the Brooklyn boy she once dislike.
Her and Dan at the Hallway saying each others thoughts..
Her and Dan at the gallery, Dan telling her that she should take a risk..
Her and Dan at the party, Him telling her she deserves to be with someone who makes her happy..
Her coming to the Loft to save Serena...
Her and Dan in an old car to go after Juliet...
Her and Dan alone at the holidays watching Nanette...
Her and Dan hiding in a closet where Chuck declared his love for Raina...
Her and Dan on the phone celebrating Valentines together while watching Rose Mary's baby...
Her and Dan hiding their friendship and enjoying it...
Her and Dan at the bathroom, her admitting she was pregnant...
Her and Dan at the loft discussing about paternity test and Dan assuring she would always have him...
Her and Dan in the streets, her admitting she came to Dan because he's the only one who could save her from her own worst instinct...
She and Dan at the loft, him hugging her and telling her he knows how to make her happy...
Her and Dan at the Church after her losing the baby and Chuck in coma...
Her and Dan at Vera Wang, her admitting she can't wear a wedding dress designed to fit with her and her baby...
Yes... Blair's memories float out, her losing the baby... Losing the only thing she was holding on, Blair tried to look for Chuck, she's crying, she need someone...
Blair looked around; people passing her by, different kinds. Those are people not running away but instead going to a place they know they should be. She walked backwards; overwhelmed of the fear she has inside of her, then she bump into a baggage, she tripped and fell to the floor, tears running from her eyes, tears of fear. She's afraid of what she's feeling right now, the confusion, the uncertainty and the willingness to stay.
"Miss are you alright?" A female voice asked. Blair looked up and saw a woman carrying a child that might be ten months old. She felt her heart ache. All this time she hid her guilt from her baby's death inside of her. She felt as if she should be that woman, carrying her child to the airport as they go to their first family trip. She stood up, wiped her tears and smiled.
"I'm fine." Blair looked down and walked away.
Walking towards a store, she saw a little girl, sitting on the floor playing with a cabbage patch doll, she stared at that little girl who looks so happy, then her mother came and smiled at the little girl, told her something Blair couldn't hear, and the child stood up, grabbed her mother's hand, and both walk hand in hand towards the tunnel to the plane. She felt her heart ache more, if her baby hadn't died, she would have grown up just like that little girl, happy and contented, everything blair wasn't while growing up. She wanted to forget about the accident, but she can't... She can't run away from it anymore.
*end of flashback*
"I didn't know what made her change her mind, she just did." Chuck explained gloomily,
"You went after her?" Dan asked.
"When I came back here at the empire, Louis was here, checking up on us...When he learned that Blair didn't run away with me, he felt happy, he told me its better that Blair chooses herself rather than choosing me..." Chuck explained again, " and then I decided that our love, our obsession with each other is unhealthy, I need to let her go, we need to let each other go... In that way we may both find the things we both needed"
"That's bull!" Dan shouted. "She's not like any of us, she was born here, never left this place not without Serena, she will get lost... And if she did, you'll answer to me" Dan stated angrily.
"Give her credit Humphrey, she's moving her own parameters, unlike anyone of us she's moving pass the old Blair" Chuck answered calmly, pouring another drink.
"Why do you say so?" Dan asked.
"Because the last words she told me, that I don't have her heart anymore, it belongs to someone else" Chuck stated now looking straight at him. " I think we both know who that is...and the old Blair would not have the heart to do that"
With those Last words, Chuck stood up and left Dan in the living room, stunned and uncertain on what to react. Everyone's growing up, looking passes the old them... Everyone except him.