Before I start I'd like to say a big, big thank you to Emily-ILovedHerAgainstReason and WolfMarauder who were my only two reviewers despit my story being viewed 164 times!
You all made Poncho the smiley face Moustache guy sad! D}:
Anyway thanks guys!#
Tonks
I don't know if Molly was comforting myself or her any more as she hugged me. Telling me she was sorry but she couldn't heal me the rest of my 'wounds'. I just nodded assuring her I would take pain potions until I healed by myself.
"Do you want to stay at the Burrow tonight?" She asked.
I would have loved to stay there but I found myself answering. "No Molly I couldn't, you have a full house...," I started before she cut me off.
"Nonsense! I'm sure Hermoine wouldn't mind sharing with Ginny and Harry's already sharing with Ron..." Now it was my turn to interrupt.
"Harry? When did Harry get there?" I asked
"Right after you.. left," She said picking her words carefully.
"Oh, well if your sure there's a room for me," I said trying no to sound to eager.
"Of course there is dear," She told me quickly "Maybe you want to get changed first?"
I looked down at my torn and blood stained clothes and nodded "Yeah that might be a good idea," I said laughing bitterly. Yesterday I would have probably made a sarcastic joke out of that question, but now even though I'm only a day older I feel so much more grown up.
I took the fastest shower know to man! The full minute and a half I was in there I longed for the protection of clothes but when I finally put them on I still didn't feel safe. I knew it would take much more than clothes to make me feel protected , in fact I doubted I ever would again!
I was wearing long trousers and long top with and over-sized pink jumper thrown on over them, but I didn't feel trapped in them as I sometimes did in long clothes, in fact I was relieved to be hidden. They were giving me a sense of invisibility that even the most powerful disillusionment charm could not recreate.
I stepped down the stairs slowly, careful not to fall. Molly was standing by the door smiling at me, but I found myself unable to return it.
She took my arm gently and spun on the spot and landed just outside the door. "Some of the order are inside, they might want to ask you some questions, you don't have to tell them anything you don't want to though," She gave my hand a quick squeeze before pushing the door open.
The first thing I heard once I stepped in the kitchen was a surprise yelp of "Dora!" then I was in someone's arms, even though I was just being hugged I felt trapped. I choked back a scream as I thrashed desperately and hammer punched their chest. When they let me go and pulled back I saw it was Sirius. His eyes were searching me, looking for a reason.
I felt myself go pink, just my cheeks of course, my hair was a limp mousy brown. "I-I'm claustrophobic," I lied to try and justify my actions. I watched Sirius' eyes narrow, I know he doesn't believe me, I've never been like this before. I ignore him, sinking into a chair my head in my hands as I slowed my heart rate that had shot up.
"Tonks? What happened?" Such a simple question, that I just couldn't answer. I had been expecting it of course, but I still couldn't tell them, not yet.
"Just the usual Aunt and niece bonding," I told them deliberately avoiding the question.
"What REALLY happened?" Moody asked eyeing me up.
I pulled my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms round them, making myself as small as possible and shook my head hoping they would just stop asking me about it.
"You all right?" Arthur asked me.
"I-I'll live," I whispered my voice breaking slightly.
"Did you fight back?" Fred asked eagerly and rather out of the blue, I don't think he was trying to be insensitive, I am a fully trained auror, but none the less I hated him for asking it. I hated him because If I think about it I didn't fight back! Merlin! I'm auror and all I did was cry in a heap!
"I-I tried," I told them my voice barely audible.
"Bet you got a couple of good swings in," He grinned but I shook my head.
"I could barely move," I choked brushing away a single tear irritably.
"Right that's enough! I know you need to make sure she didn't give information away but so far all you've asked her are personal questions," Molly burst in glaring at Fred and George "So Tonks dear , what did they want to know and did you tell them?" She finished kindly.
"They-they wanted to know a-about Harry," I stuttered "And I didn't tell them anything," I looked round at every ones nods of approval "Can I go to bed now?"
"Yes yes of course dear, up the stairs second door on the left," She told me and with that I basically leapt of my chair and hurried out of the room away from all the searching glances and pitying looks.
Remus P.O.V
I'd been amazed when I found out Tonks had been coming I guess it took a mothers touch. But after being captured so cruelly like that I would have thought that company was the last thing she wanted, especially after how she acted in the flat. However I could also understand that she might be craving normality, trying to put it all behind her.
I tried to catch her eye, but she seemed determined to look at the floor from the minute she walked, rather stumbled, through the front door.
Padoot had her in a hug before she could even take in her surroundings, bad idea! I mentally screamed at him and smugly thought, told you so, when she started punching him frantically. Needless to say I wasn't convince was she told us she was claustrophobic and I only felt sorry for her when she was sitting there, head in her hands taking large steadying breaths.
"Tonks? What happened?" Kingsley asked her.
"Just the usual Aunt and niece bonding," She answered us. The words sounded like Tonks but the voice was so wrong! It was hollow and with no feeling, almost like it was a very bad actor playing Tonks, reading off a script.
"What REALLY happened?" Moody asked her.
I watched her bring her knees to her chest and, yet again, I couldn't help but compare her to a small child. I looked round everyone looked horrified! I could understand why, this witch sitting in front of us was simply not Tonks but a shell of the wonderful, bubbly person that had once been.
"You all right?" Arthur asked her his face full of concern.
"I-I'll live," her voice quivered and I wanted nothing more than to take her in my arms and tell her that everything was going to be ok, but given the circumstances I seriously doubt that would be a good idea.
"Did you fight back?" Fred asked eagerly. Smooth Fred, just smooth.
"I-I tried," I literally had to strain my ears to catch the answer and when I did I found the corners of my mouth twitch up the way a bit, there was the Tonks we knew and loved, I mean know and love.
"Bet you got a couple of good swings in," He grinned. Doesn't this kid know when to quit while he's ahead?
"I could barely move," She choked out. I watched the tears roll down her cheeks helplessly, if there was something I could do believe me I would do it without a second thought.
"Right that's enough! I know you need to make sure she didn't give information away but so far all you've asked her are personal questions," Molly burst in glaring at Fred and George "So Tonks dear , what did they want to know and did you tell them?"
"They-they wanted to know a-about Harry, and I didn't tell them anything, can I go to bed now?" She rambled quickly.
"Yes yes of course dear, up the stairs second door on the left," Molly told her and no sooner had the words left her mouth and Tonks was out the door apparently eager to be away from us all.
"Something is seriously wrong with that girl," Moody growled.
"What d'you mean?" Sirius asked
"Well she's been under the cruciatus curse and been captured and fought before, she's an auror it's almost unavoidable, but she's always come out the other end of it laughing and joking, refusing help, that sort of thing. She's one of the best young aurors I ever met, almost unfazed by pretty much anything, does that sound like the person we just saw leave?" Moody asked us "Another thing, have any of you seen Nymphadora Tonks cry before?"
Moody's revelation made the already bleak situation even worse. Every one was shaking their heads making one thing clear, she had never EVER cried in front of any of us before.
"So what do you think happened to her?" I asked
"It has to be something life altering, almost scarring," Moody told us.
"Oh it was scarring all right," Molly spat out angrily.
"You know what happened?" Sirius asked "Tell us!"
"I-I'm not sure I should," Molly said carefully "It's something that she needs to do herself,"
We all looked at her minds working to unscramble what she'd just said.
Tonks P.O.V
You weakling! A voice at the back of my head snarled at me. Crying in front of the order like that! Now they're going to think you to pathetic to be in it!
I collapsed on the bed trying to force the mental barricade back up again, maybe, just maybe I could get some sleep. So I pulled my jumper off and slipped under the covers relishing the safe feeling of being cocooned by myself.
He was chasing me down a long corridor with no windows and no way out. I saw my aunt running towards me so I slipped round a corner that appeared out of no where. I was running flat out desperate to get away but I could hear them pounding along behind me, getting closer and closer! Then the inevitable happened, I tripped landing on the cold hard floor. I found myself unable to get up! Then they reached me...
I woke with a start and a scream. I slapped my hand over my mouth desperately hoping no one had heard me. I sat in complete silence for a while, my ears straining to hear any foot steps and when at last I decided I was in the clear I realised how badly I was shaking!
I climbed out of bed with stealth that I had never possessed before and crept down the stairs. My heart nearly stopped when I saw a dark figure sitting in a kitchen chair. I pulled my wand out faster than the speed of light before realising it was only Remus. Do you really need a drink? I found myself asking. But the dry scratchy feeling at the back of my throat answered that for me.
"Tonks?" He asked surprised as he saw me lurking in the doorframe.
I took a deep breath and stepped into the darkness of the kitchen. I held my wand up and muttered "Accio," under my breath. Instantly a cup flew out of the cupboard and I caught it deftly before walking over to the tap and fulling it up.
I stood there gulping down the water quickly with my eyes never leaving Remus, who, was staring right back.
"Will you tell me?" He said breaking the unbearable silence.
"Tell you what?" I asked deliberately misunderstanding him.
"You know what I mean," He said "Will you tell me what happened?"
"I- Remus- you see," I stammered unable to find an answer. "Not yet," I finally settled on.
"Why not?" He asked me looking genuinely hurt.
"I-I'm just not ready, not tonight," I told him
He stood up very, very slowly and walked towards me until he was only inches away. I surprised myself by not shying away but standing up tall and almost confidently. I surprised myself by not screaming at him when he placed a cautious hand on my shoulder. I surprised myself by actually enjoying being held by him and being rocked from side to side.
"Then I'll wait for you," He whispered in my ear.
There you have it, chapter 3 xD Was it any good?
Please please please review an tell me unlike the other 162 people who read my story!
Oh and one last thing before I go! I'm away on holiday for a week and a bit tomorrow xD So I haven't given up, I just have no internet connection :( hopefully I'll have another chapter up soon xD