The Way Things Are Supposed To Be
Chapter Three: Revealed
Babblings: Sorry it's taken me so long. I will really try to update more frequently, though this story will not be all too long. Now that finals are over, I won't have to spend all my free time studying.
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When I woke up, he was gone.
I began to panic, throwing off my blanket and searching for anything – anything – that would tell me where he went. Then I saw it: a note quickly scrawled on a piece of parchment, written in Draco's fancy handwriting.
Harry,
Please understand: I love you with all my heart, but I cannot go against my father. Try to forget about last night. I know I said I would forget, but I never will. I will never forget you. Ever. That is a promise.
Don't look for me. You won't find me no matter how hard you look, but I will always be with you, in your heart, even if you don't remember.
With all my love,
Draco
I wanted to cry, but I couldn't bring myself to. I had to move beyond this. I had to forget Draco, no matter how much my heart told me I needed to remember. I let out one last long sigh, glancing at the remainders of our camp, my last memory with Draco. Then I gathered my things and nudged Buckbeak awake. "C'mon, boy," I said, gently caressing his beak. His stood, shaking himself, nearly blowing me backwards. In spite of myself, I let out a soft laugh.
The fly back seemed to go by too quickly. I really didn't want to go back, but I knew I had to. Everyone was probably worried about me. And Lucius… I shuddered at the thought of how he would react.
We landed in the courtyard. Within a few seconds my husband-to-be was on me, clutching my thin wrist in his large hand. "Where the hell have you been?" he hissed, roughly yanking me off Buckbeak.
"I just… had to leave for awhile…" I muttered.
"I'm sure," he sneered. "Well, I'm going to make sure you never leave again." He pulled me down many winding corridors until we came to my bedroom. Shoving me inside, he said, his mouth twisting into an evil smile, "Don't even try to get out until we are wed, love," and slammed the door in my face.
And, suddenly, I was totally and completely alone and I allowed the tears to come. No one was there to hear them.
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For days I sat alone in my room, staring out the window at the beautiful view, yearning to be out there amongst the flowers and the birds and Mother Earth. It was so close, yet so far out of my reach. This had always been my favorite time of year: Spring. It was when everything got to start over again. Everywhere you looked there was new life. But this year I didn't get to be a part of it. So I watched everyone else laugh and love while I wilted away in my room.
Then, a few weeks after the beginning of my exile to my room, I started to get horribly sick to my stomach, though it was mostly only in the mornings. No one comforted me as I threw up the entire contents of my stomach over and over again. The maids that brought me my meals every day must have noticed how pale and sickly I had gotten. But they didn't say anything. Maybe they thought it was only because I hadn't been out in the sunshine for so long.
Apparently no one was allowed to visit me, because I didn't even see my parents for several weeks. So, suffice to say, I was rather surprised when my mother stepped over the threshold of my door one morning after I had finished puking up my guts. "Harry?" she asked, walking to my bed where I laid, resting, my body seemingly exhausted.
My eyes fluttered open and I rubbed them in an attempt to clear my vision. "Good morning, Mother," I said, wearily.
I felt a cool hand touch my forehead. "You're burning up. Is something wrong?"
I was unsure of what to tell her: the truth or a lie? After a moment of deciding, I opted for the truth, figuring maybe it would get me out of my room if I had to take a trip to the healer's. "I've been throwing up every morning for two weeks."
A shocked and worried look came over her. "Why didn't you tell anyone?"
"I'm not allowed to leave my room, remember? Or did you not know?" I asked, bitterly, almost sarcastically.
"Has no one talked with you since then?"
I wanted to glare at her, to show her how much I hated my life and everything that had been happening to me, but I couldn't. I wouldn't let her blame herself for this. "No."
"Well, come on," she said, taking my hand. "I'm taking you to the healer's. If Lucius doesn't like it, then he can take it up with me. You won't make a very good wife if you are dead."
A laugh came up in my throat, but I forced it back. Wouldn't that be ironic if I died before I could even get married to the man who had ruined my life? A thought occurred to me that this may have something to do with Draco. I didn't know how or why, but I had always been perfectly healthy until… I shook my head, refusing to let the memories of that night come back to me. They were too good – too good to be real. Perhaps I had made up that night so I could have one good memory amongst so many bad ones.
But I knew it was real; the note Draco had written to me was tucked safely in a locked drawer in my room.
Mother held my hand as she led the way to the healing rooms on the other side of the castle. I breathed in deeply, once again getting used to the feeling of fresh air in my lungs. Already I felt better. Hopefully I wasn't suffering anything more than heartsickness.
… but what if I was?
"Harry?" asked my mother, interrupting my thoughts. We were in front of the healing rooms. "I have to go take care of some things in court, but I will be back in a little while." She brushed away a few strands of hair from my eyes and kissed my forehead, gracefully flitting away.
Inside the healing rooms I found only the healer. Part of me was hoping she had more patients – then I would be able to stay out of my rooms longer. She looked up from some medicinal potion she was making and smiled. "Hello, Prince Harry. I haven't seen you in here for ages." Somehow I managed to smile to back at her. "So what brings you to here today?"
"Well, Mother… she said I should come see you, because I've been really sick every morning for a couple of weeks now."
She nodded and stood up, leading me over to a small bed she used for examining. "Lay here," she commanded softly, closing her eyes to concentrate. In my kingdom, healers were rare beings. Healing was not a skill one acquired: you were either born with it or you weren't. I didn't know exactly how it worked, but every time I had been in here before, she always closed her eyes.
When she opened them again, she began prodding my stomach, asking if it hurt, which was kind of odd, because of course it hurt when she was poking so hard. Then she closed her eyes again and held her hands over my body. She stopped when her hands came to rest immediately over my lower stomach. A puzzled expression came to her face. When she opened her eyes she looked at me as though I had done something really bad.
"What is it?" I asked nervously.
"Well, if I didn't know better, I'd say you were pregnant. But that can't be possible, right, Harry? You're supposed to be…"
"…a virgin?" I finished for her.
She nodded and I lowered my eyes. Pregnant? I mean, sure, it was possible, but after just once? Surely not.
"Is there something we don't know about?" she asked, lifting my chin so I could meet her eyes. "This is very important, Harry. If you are pregnant, you will not be able to hide it for long."
What was going to happen to me? My parents would disown me; too ashamed of their own son. At the very least they'd hide me from the world. What would they say to me? I was supposed to save my virginity for my husband. Lucius…
I shuddered violently.
Lucius would kill me.
Suddenly, a wave of sobs came over me and my healer held me in her arms, telling me it would be okay, but I knew it wouldn't be; it couldn't be. "I-it was D-draco," I stuttered through my tears. "I s-slept with him."
I thought she would be disgusted with me, toss me to the side, and run, blabbing, to the whole kingdom. Instead she just held me closer, this time not even trying to stop my crying.
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My eyes were glued to the floor; I found myself unable to meet any of their gazes. The healer told me I had to go tell them right then. If I waited I would never be able to do it. She was standing somewhere behind me while I stood in front of my parents and Lucius.
"Did you find out what was wrong with you, Harry?" asked my mother.
"There was something wrong with him?" asked Lucius, eyeing me suspiciously, as though he were trying to read my mind.
"I had been throwing up a lot," I managed to say.
"So what's wrong?" asked Father, seemingly growing impatient.
I felt all their gazes boring into me, all waiting more an answer. My voice got stuck in my throat, my stomach felt ill again. Finally, I managed to say, "I'm pregnant."
"WHAT?" yelled Father standing up and glaring at Lucius. "YOU SAID YOU'D WAIT UNTIL YOU WERE MARRIED!"
Lucius' lips turned up into a sneer. "It wasn't me. I haven't gone against my word."
"Harry?" asked Mother, in that calm tone of voice I hated so much because it showed how disappointed she was in me. "Who was it?"
"Draco."
You could have heard a pin drop. Complete silence filled the room. Then, Father spat at me and said in a voice dripping with disgust, "Get out of my sight. Don't let me lay eyes on you. GET OUT!"
I nodded and turned, tears pricking my eyes. As soon as I had left the throne room though, I felt someone behind me: Lucius. He grabbed me roughly and I protectively put a hand over my stomach. He cackled maliciously, poking me. "You've put me to shame, Potter," he hissed. "Don't expect this to be the last of this." And then he did something he had never done before: he slapped me, hard, across the cheek. "I will get what I want one way or the other."
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Needless to say, I couldn't sleep that night. The cold and darkness seemed to press in around me. I felt more alone than I had ever felt in my entire life. As I lay on my bed, I brought my knees to my chest, rocking myself back and forth, whispering to my unborn child. "I will love you, I promise, even if no one else does. I promise."
In a way, it was ironic really. Draco said he'd always be with me, and in a way that was true. He had left something behind inside of me. I only wished Draco was here with me, holding me as I cried.
I didn't know what to do. I could run away, but where would I go? I didn't really know how to live by myself for any long length of time.
I needed Draco. But where in the world was he?
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Babblings: So there is chapter three. I hope you liked it. Tell me what you think in a REVIEW. Ha. I love you guys!
Oh (this is kinda random but...) if any of you are inerested in roleplaying, I desperately need to start a couple more. They're m y addiction. lol